Forced to open

Lu Yuan got in the car, Lu Yuan drove home, but Yu Qing didn't say a word.

As soon as he entered the door, Lu Yuan raised his hand and hugged Yu Qing into his arms, pressed him to kiss and touch him, "Qingqing, I didn't mean to lie to you. You also know the bastard thing I did at the beginning, when you I don't want to talk to me at all, and I can't help but resist me!" Lu Yuan said while walking towards the bedroom in a daze, "Don't blame me, I really have no choice."

"I have to?" Yu Qing raised her arms and struggled violently, pushing Lu Yuan away from her body, "I don't want to talk to you is the reason why you lied to me? You still make me think I owe you so much money?"

"I told you not to return it to me." Lu Yuan was half a head taller than Yu Qing, with a strong body, and the little struggle in the face of Yu Qing could only be regarded as a trivial matter, "I'm not interested in that money at all."

Lu Yuan said what was in his heart, but these were not the most angry places in Yu Qing's heart. "You are a selfish young master, you don't think you are wrong at all!"

"I was wrong." Lu Yuan fell down on the bed in the bedroom dragging his emotions, put oil on his mouth and said the words before thinking about them, "I shouldn't have lied to you, it's all my fault."

"Let me go!" Hearing his tone, Yu Qing could only feel sadness in her heart. Everything Lu Yuan did was based on his trust and self-esteem, "You let me go, I don't owe you money, there is no need Listen to you here. You and I are here today. I mistrusted you before, and nothing will happen to us in the future."

Go... Lu Yuan suddenly panicked when he heard this word.

This word means parting, it means being a stranger, and it means that everything at the moment will be burned.

Lu Yuan turned over and put Yu Qing under him, "You can't go anywhere, I asked you if you didn't have money, would you stay... You didn't say anything, you didn't say you would leave!"

Where does Lu Yuan's cruelty come from? It's his childishness.Where does this childishness come from? It can only be attributed to the fact that he and Yu Qing are completely different people.Perhaps in Lu Yuan's world, playing games and buying and selling money and sex are commonplace and not worth mentioning, but for Yu Qing, it is an unbearable bottom line being ruthlessly trampled on, "How can you say such a thing?" Words? When you asked me like that, you were thinking that one day I would find out, so that I could use my reaction to keep me?" Yu Qing raised her head and took a deep breath, breathless under his pressure, "Let go of me, I am now I'm leaving!"

Yu Qing's words were admitted, and he didn't say a word at that time, implying that... stay.

"Qingqing, don't go." After hearing this, Lu Yuan didn't want him to leave even more. This unique and gentle hometown haunted Lu Yuan's soul, and he couldn't let go after getting used to it. "I won't let you go." Lu Yuan stretched out his hand while saying Rip off Yu Qing's pants.Logically speaking, making a love affair has to be consensual. If one party regrets, the relationship will be broken and each will be well.Lu Yuan is familiar with this 'rhythm process', but he can't put that casualness on Yu Qing's body, "You are also very happy by my side, don't you like this feeling these few months?"

"You bastard!" Yu Qing struggled violently, unable to bear Lu Yuan's confounding rhetoric.He hurt Lu Yuan's cheek with his elbow, and Lu Yuan got up and pressed him to undo his zipper, "You obviously like it very much." Lu Yuan supported his //root// son against Yu Qingshuang// Between//between the legs, the vicious eyes seem to express all emotions with //sex//love//.

This is the way Lu Yuan is most familiar with, the only way.

You have only so much patience.Yu Qing turned her head to look at Lu Yuan, he didn't say this, but his eyes were speaking, and the expression on his cheek was mocking Lu Yuan silently.

Laugh at his embarrassment, laugh at his helplessness.

At this moment, Lu Yuan was the one who lost his dignity and his body was bruised. He went around and went around and was finally inspired to 'out of control' by his remaining emotions.

As a last resort?Is this what Lu Yuan called forced?It's so pathetic and disgusting.

Lu Yuan took a deep breath and suddenly calmed down.All the emotions in his body were heading towards his lower abdomen, desire was burning but Lu Yuan's body began to turn cold, cooling down bit by bit with Yu Qing's eyes.He rubbed his temples, swallowed his saliva, got up and took two steps back, "Get lost!" His uneasiness and resentment came up all at once, why could his remaining emotions make him lose control over and over again, why could he be defeated by a single look? His self-esteem was torn apart, "Do you think I can't do without you? If you want to leave, get out now, get out quickly."

"..." Yu Qing got up from the bed, straightened her clothes and walked outside the house, without looking at Lu Yuan the whole time.

Yu Qing quickly packed up her own things in the house, and knocked down the unassembled Lego blocks when she left.

Crack...'Clarinet' fell to the ground and shattered, like the sound of a heart falling to the ground.

"Doctor Qi, I almost lost control again, I... don't know what to do."

"Almost?"

"Yes, but I got it under control."

"Still the same person?"

"Yes."

Lu Yuan fell into an unprecedented entanglement, he felt that he didn't need to be serious about a passer-by on the bed, but just the word 'passer-by' made him feel uncomfortable all over.The remaining feelings have not flowed from his heart, and it is not just a guest in this bedroom.

"Tell me about what happened?"

Lu Yuan seldom talks about the details of life to Dr. Qi, out of self-protection and the sense of distance between men.However, Lu Yuan was irritable and resentful. He hadn't been in such a dilemma and at a loss as he is now for several years.He told Dr. Qi a lot about Yu Qing, which included the similarity between Yu Qing and the butterfly, and also included the fact that he was looking for similarities in Yu Qing these days.

"Did you find it?" Dr. Qi, as a psychiatrist, has a strong professionalism, he did not comment on Lu Yuan's behavior, and simply guided the other party to express, "Have you found what you want?"

"I...don't know." Lu Yuan spent the past few months coveting physical pleasure, looking at Yu Qing always felt itchy, never asked what he wanted, "I just don't want him to go. "

"Do you still remember what I said when you were doing psychotherapy with me?"

At the very beginning, Lu Yuan found himself losing control over sex//love after more than half a year in a foreign country.Everything can make him feel sexual, but he can't feel the slightest emotion flowing in his chest.He went from enjoying to being enslaved//served, from pleasure to burden...Sex//love became the outlet of all emotions, the only way to vent.This feeling is as if only on the bed can Lu Yuan feel the intersection with the world, to connect in the most primitive but direct way, and at the same time bring deep disgust and self-abandonment.

Lu Yuan struggled in fear, and found himself a psychiatrist before he collapsed.Doctor Qi chatted with Lu Yuan, talking about his experience of losing his mother when he was young.Lu Yuan said, I didn't 'lose' my mother, she left me on her own initiative.Doctor Qi also asked about Lu Yuan's relationship experience, and after a brief chat, Lu Yuan said that he took my father's money and left me on his own initiative.

Dr. Qi has helped Lu Yuan a lot in the past few years, helping him to ease from his self-resistance and disgust, and helping him to reconcile with part of himself.For the rest, Lu Yuan used his own method.

He has plenty of money.When exchanging money for sex, whether it is in the name of love or the reality of nurturing, Lu Yuan will try every means to get himself out at the moment of disgust, so as to avoid the accumulation of emotions.

Lu Yuan has never felt this kind of disgust in Yu Qing, except that he complained about himself when he used violence out of control at first, and sex//love itself gave him something fresh and a different kind of expectation.At first, Lu Yuan thought that this expectation would decrease with time, but it turned out that when Yu Qing told him to 'break it all', this expectation was still lingering in his heart and could not be resolved for a long time.

Do you remember what I said when you were in therapy with me in the first place?Heart addiction is sometimes a manifestation of obsession.

Lu Yuan has remembered this sentence all these years, but he didn't pay attention to it, or he couldn't understand it at all.Doctor Qi didn't want to use the word 'sex//addiction' to describe Lu Yuan's state, he always described these two words separately to ease the pain in Lu Yuan's heart.

"Looking for the past itself is an obsession," Dr. Qi said flatly on the other end of the phone, and then added to Lu Yuan, "The last time he made you lose control was because of similarities, but this time? Or because of similarities? Why did you Got yourself under control?"

Lu Yuan recalled Yu Qing's eyes, which crushed his self-esteem, and at the same time pierced his heart like a sharp knife.Lu Yuan's body kept getting colder because of that pale and fearful but firm and beneficial eyes... Yu Qing looked into the depths of Lu Yuan's soul, as if looking for something in the endless abyss.Lu Yuan was terrified that he would find something unsightly, and even more terrified that he would find that there was nothing in that void, nothing... could be found.

"It's also because of him. I'm afraid he'll get hurt, I'm afraid I'll hurt him." Lu Yuan took a deep breath, closed his eyes and lay down on the golden velvet sheet, "But I regret letting him go...I can't let him go."

Dr. Qi was silent on the other end of the phone, and after thinking for a while, he said earnestly, "Then you can just let 'go' go."

"..."

"Put 'similar' away."

7-1

The building blocks that were broken on the ground due to leaving in love have not been cleaned up. Lu Yuan rested at home for a day, and his eyes lingered on the building blocks.

He called Dr. Qi, and then spent half a day adjusting his mentality.

Jiang Yuan 'consoled' Lu Yuan's situation later.Lu Yuan covered his face with the phone