Confessions of a retired star

Fang Shuyun held his breath and listened for a few minutes with pointed ears. After confirming that Fang Tingchen was crying, he hesitated for a few more minutes.

Get up to comfort him?Or leave him space and let him vent alone?

Fang Shuyun finally chose the former. He sat up slowly and stood beside the bed. With his height, he could easily see his brother on the upper bunk.

Fang Tingchen turned his back to him, his undeveloped body curled up like a shrimp, he was wearing earphones, his thin shoulders were shaking.

Fang Shuyun put his warm palm on Fang Tingchen's arm: "If you have any sad things, tell brother, brother will help you share."

Fang Tingchen ignored him, and Fang Shuyun also felt that what he said was wrong. It's not that he doesn't know why his brother is sad.

He left the bunk bed, took out the comics he picked up in the living room that night from the desk drawer, and put them next to Fang Tingchen's pillow.

"This is for you, I picked it up from under the coffee table, they didn't see it..."

Fang Tingchen's shoulders moved, his crying slowed down, but he still faced the wall.

"I read this comic. The characters and forms of expression are very unique. The content is a bit violent, but violence also has violent aesthetics," Fang Shuyun said softly, "and I believe readers can distinguish the difference between artistic creation and reality. You That's the way it is, right?"

"You are the only one with brains in this family."

Fang Tingchen was finally willing to speak, and replied angrily, Fang Shuyun laughed, and Fang Tingchen added in a tearful tone: "Grandma and grandpa also have it."

"Since parents are idiots, then people in Smart Country shouldn't be angry with them, should we?" Fang Shuyun coaxed patiently.

Fang Tingchen turned over and glared at Fang Shuyun angrily with his childish eyes: "Do you also treat me as a child?"

"No..." Fang Shuyun blurted out his excuses, then nodded slowly, "I'm sorry, you are my younger brother, I sometimes forget that you are already 12 years old."

Fang Tingchen curled his lips, wiped away the tears, and looked aside coolly with his chin raised: "I have lived in Gordon Hill for 11 years. Although Xue Fu often goes out to perform with the dance troupe, as long as she is free, she will always be there." Stay by my side, teach me life skills, teach me how to get along with myself and others. Fang Liwen spends his days in school and doesn't care about me at all. Now that Xue Fu died less than a year ago, this man remarried with his ex-wife. Talking bad about Xuefu, why should I put up with him? I have decided, I will leave tomorrow."

"Xue Fu...it's the first time I've heard her name." Fang Shuyun didn't immediately dissuade Fang Tingchen, but turned on the lamp and sat on the desk, "Tell me about your mother, what kind of person she is. "

"She's the one who respects me the most."

"anything else?"

"And..." Fang Tingchen sniffed and took off the earphones, "She grew up in an orphanage and later became a ballet dancer. She...she is no worse than your mother."

Fang Shuyun nodded thoughtfully: "Then she must have worked very hard."

"Yes, she suffered a lot when she was young, but she never interfered with what I did. She only gave me advice and let me make my own choices. She told me to follow my heart in doing things," Fang Tingchen's eyes were full of It is pride and nostalgia, "She is the person who understands me best in the world."

"Do you have a picture of her? I want to see her."

"Have."

Fang Tingchen took out a yellowed Polaroid photo from under the pillow and handed it to Fang Shuyun.

A young long-haired woman in suspender jeans sits on an armchair full of books, holding a fat baby in her arms, who giggles with a tambourine, and her husband points the camera at her, who is teasing the baby, in The moment she raised her head, the tambourine almost hit her small chin, and at this moment, Polaroid pressed the shutter.

Fang Shuyun looked at this photo for a long time.

"She's beautiful... feels like she's a happy person."

Fang Tingchen faced Fang Shuyun, lay on the bed, and agreed.

Fang Shuyun turned up the desk lamp a bit, put the photo under Fang Tingchen's pillow, organized his words, and it was time to get down to business.

"Do you really want to leave? You don't have any relatives to take care of you abroad. After the summer vacation is over, your parents will not live here. At that time, it will be just me, you and my grandparents... By the way, there will be me Good friend, the five of us, life will be easy."

"I want to go," Fang Tingchen was unmoved, "This is a foreign land for me. Gordon Hill is my hometown and my mother's hometown. I can go to boarding school or not. House I can cook for myself, apply for dole, I can take care of myself."

"You imagined well, but the actual situation may be very bad. You are only 12 years old, and the safety issue is first..."

There were footsteps walking outside the door, Fang Shuyun fell silent, and lightly turned off the desk lamp, Fang Tingchen also cooperated and did not speak.

The footsteps stopped, the water tank in the bathroom flushed, the footsteps sounded again, and then stopped again. After waiting for a minute, Fang Shuyun turned on the desk lamp and turned it to the darkest. Fang Tingchen had already slept back on the bed.

"You treat me like a child again, and it's not like I haven't lived independently before," Fang Tingchen said first, puffing his face depressed, "It's even worse for me here, your mother's desire to control is too strong, she looks like an independent |The arbiter, the manga and the game console are my partners, and they are all taken by her... If you stay here, you can't escape her control, I don't like her, I want to leave. "

"Comics, game consoles..." Fang Shuyun thought about Fang Tingchen's words, and seemed to have found the crux of the matter, "Wait a minute."

He took out a bank card from the drawer and put it in the palm of Fang Tingchen's hand spread beside the bed.

"This is the pocket money I saved. The password is my birthday and entered backwards. You can use it to buy your favorite comics and games, and put them in grandma's room to read quietly."

Fang Tingchen raised his head and looked at the card in his hand: "Can I buy other things?"

"As long as it makes you happy, as long as you don't break the law, you can buy whatever you want."

Fang Tingchen lay back and squeezed the bank card tightly: "Then...then I will borrow you first, and I will pay you back double when I have money."

After turning off the lights, Fang Shuyun heard Fang Tingchen say thank you, he smiled, said good night, and finally got a good night's sleep.

Fang Tingchen was found by Fang Liwen at noon the next day. At that time, he was buying a ticket at the ticket office with his passport. Fang Liwen, who was so angry, caught him head-on. Can't stop.

Xu Xian advised Fang Liwen not to use force. She asked Fang Tingchen who gave the money with a dark face, but Fang Tingchen didn't say anything, and was about to be punished again. Fang Shuyun hurriedly protected his brother and said that he gave it to him.

Now it's all right, Fang Shuyun suffered together, the two brothers were scolded, Fang Tingchen was sent outside the door and punished to stand and think about his mistakes, Fang Shuyun stayed in the living room and continued to be scolded.

Fang Tingchen was beaten and hadn't eaten lunch. His legs were limp, and he couldn't support himself after standing for a while. He sat on the swing chair in the garden, tucked his knees, and put on the earphones.

"You are too ignorant, you only know how to mess around with Chenchen!"

The father's stern scolding came from inside the house. The soothing music could not cover up the harsh scolding. There seemed to be a breeze passing by. Fang Tingchen raised his head slightly. There is a bicycle with a back seat lying on it, it seems to have just parked there, and it seems to have been there for a long time.

Before he had time to think about its origin, Fang Tingchen's distracted attention was drawn back into the conflict by the quarrel.

"More than 5000 yuan, to buy a plane ticket for a 12-year-old child!"

"It was Shuyun who felt sorry for Chenchen, so don't blame him."

"That's right."

"You are indulging Fang Tingchen. No one cares about him when he is abroad. He was 12 years old when he was wild. How can he still be able to return to China with Fang Shuyun's help? Send him to a military summer camp in a few days to sharpen his skills." Habit."

"I will not let you send him to a military summer camp, where children are punished physically. He is my brother, not some wild child."

Fang Tingchen's face was buried deep in his trembling knees, and bitter tears welled up in his eyes.

If you want to ask Fang Ting which day was the most memorable for him, he will definitely answer without hesitation: August 12rd when he was [-] years old.

Because in his loneliest time, his angel came.

At that time, Fang Tingchen first heard the sound of the bicycle creaking and riding far away, and then the sound turned from far to near, and suddenly a refreshing breeze blew, Fang Tingchen's earphones were taken off, and a boy in a light-colored shirt sat by his side.

He couldn't forget the scent on his body, cheap industrial essence mixed with alcohol, and the scent of fresh orange evaporated on his glistening white skin, permeated in his slow breathing, with the wetness of rain and dew.

He couldn't forget his light brown hair, which flowed softly by the ear and in the socket, curled up on the curls, and as he nodded and raised his head, the shaking hair idly fiddled with the fine sunlight above his head.

I can't forget his eyes full of light and morning dew, and the small, round red mole in his eyes. I'm afraid that if he blinks, the dots in his eyes will roll down with a puddle of water, which makes Fang When Ting Chen dreamed of him later, the self in the dream always followed him with a bottle, crying for him at any time.

There is also the smell of cotton cloth from the corner of his shirt, which has been baked dry by the temperature, and the faintly visible section under his shirt, after Fang Tingchen became sensible, entangled his slender waist in a hazy mood.

The song in the earphones, "Close To You", was heard by Fang Tingchen many times during the summer vacation when they met. At that time, he would hold his knees in the same position in the same position in the same afternoon, plug in the earphones, and wait The opponent came again.

However he never came again.

Fang Tingchen waited on the swing chair from summer to autumn, day after day, in a state that was almost superstitious.

The person who listened to the song with him, wiped away his tears, put the Galaxy Cube into his hand, and told him not to give up the pursuit of happiness never came.

"What's your name?"

"My name is……"

This is their last conversation, and it is also the bridge that Fang Tingchen must go through every time he dreams of him. Often the dream ends before the other party can answer.

What is the meaning of a word Li plus a vertical, is it a name, and who is it.