Always get married in a parallel world [Comprehensive British and American]

Deadpool was in a bad mood today, and while he's always been in a bad mood, today was definitely worse.

Failed to attack Tony Stark for the 42nd time, and was laughed at by the little spider in the funny gym suit.Deadpool came out of Stark Tower, squatted down on the ground, and began to complain to the dog who was urinating at the fire hydrant.

"I really envy you for being so carefree. My child, I want to raise you, but a person like my brother doesn't have the energy to feed you dog food and shovel poop, and he has to... look at you and not let you Peeing and licking your own ass at the fire hydrant, it's really hard. I have a big job to do, and that's to kill that Tony shit who likes to seduce ignorant girls."

Seeing the golden retriever ignorantly lowering his head and sniffing a lump of colorless things in the shade, Deadpool suddenly became interested again: "Brother thinks maybe you will have a common language with shit, after all, you two They all have similar hobbies, and now... I have a task for you. When you see a slut wearing a red armor, you will bite him off like a bone. How about it! You rush to the front to attract all the firepower, and I will help you insert|knife ! Awesome! What a great idea!"

Deadpool changed his lying position, and looked at the dog with a silly face that was sticking out his tongue at him with a loving face: "I don't even know your name, buddy. Slum millionaire Dog? Terminator Dog? Or Deadpool 2?"

"Hey! Get out of here! Go lie down somewhere else!"

Deadpool turned his head innocently, and saw a seaweed head running over aggressively and roaring: "Yeah? What's the problem?"

"This is a handicapped driveway! You can't lie here! Get the hell out of here!"

"I want to defend myself." Deadpool jumped up, leaned in front of the man's face, clasped his hands together, pointed to his head and said, "Brothers are brainless!"

"You are simply crazy! Wearing strange tights in broad daylight! And talking to a dog for a long time! I want to call the police!" Seaweed head took two steps back, as if he was afraid of being infected with some germs.

And at this moment, the dog that Deadpool hoped for seemed to have seen something, "Wow..." After barking twice, it jumped on its four legs and ran out quickly.

Deadpool was in a hurry, and also chased after him: "Hey, the end dog! Do you smell the smell of shit?! You are so hardworking! You are so brave! I want to learn from you! Wait for me one by one"

Deadpool held the knife and followed behind the golden retriever, who stopped in front of a hot dog stand.But Deadpool didn't stop, and it must be that Jordan (the screenwriter) was giving him the key clue that would allow him to kill the little princess Tony they were protecting from the Avengers.

After walking around the small park, Deadpool finally found the guidance of the plot.

From behind a wall, a constant flash of light appeared.The constantly flickering light of the 'biubiu' made him unable to control his body at all, so he rushed over by himself.

Then, his forehead hurt, and when he opened his eyes again, he found that day had turned into night.

He came to another place.

"It's great! Brother with a belt without teleportation can travel freely! Brother has upgraded!" Deadpool happily wanted to dance a song immediately.

But soon he found a partner with whom he could dance.

One by one, those two white heads with distinct rhythms.

"Ouyiyiye! Hey guys, your white clothes are really trendy. Which band are you in? Form a group and come out to play violent disco? Great! How about letting me join? I like this kind of excitement the most."

The two super fitness bodies stopped moving, while the Flash Man Barry and the Green Lantern Man Hal, who were fighting anxiously with them, looked bewildered.

Barry and Hal looked at each other and asked at the same time.

"Is he your friend?"

"You invited him?"

After looking at each other, the two denied at the same time.

"no!"

"I do not know him."

"Who are you?" Flash Barry was pushed into the floor tiles by the super fitness body one second, and appeared next to Deadpool in the next second.

"Wow! My brother loves you to death! The speed is so fast! How did you do it just now?" Deadpool put his arm around Barry's shoulder, leaned into his ear and said, "Are you also at this speed on the bed? ?”

Barry pushed Deadpool away, resisted the urge to beat him and returned to Hal's side: "Don't worry about this guy, he should be someone who is not afraid of death!"

Deadpool didn't mind Barry's escape, he was still immersed in excitement.He greeted them enthusiastically: "Brother is Deadpool! The incarnation of superheroes, the killer of criminals. Everyone loves me! Even Nick Fury wanted to adopt me as a son, but I refused... He has no features except for one eye! My brother couldn't bear to destroy his old heart, so he went on his own independent path. When I was just born, a ninja broke into my man, since then I have carried these two knives behind me, I was a baby for half a minute, and I have been a great hero since then... It's all in my origin story..."

"These things are too heavy, now let's talk about some happy things. For example, how about a celebratory dance for you with my brother and new companions? To commemorate our wonderful..."

Before Deadpool finished speaking, the super fitness body behind him-the two white biochemical bionic robots were dispatched.One of them has the super-fast speed of the Flash, and the other has the attack method that Green Lantern can transform and amplify the weapon at will.

"You guys are too impatient, I haven't found a suitable soundtrack yet!" Deadpool was still very happy, except for one of the white faces who didn't know much about teamwork and kept trying to steal his beat.

Deadpool figured out the rhythm of his jump, and when it disappeared in an instant again, leaving only an afterimage, he stepped on the beat and stretched out his legs.

"Plop..." I almost fell into a shit with a pale face.

"Hahahaha..." Deadpool's exaggerated laughter resounded across the battlefield, he clutched his stomach and laughed, "Dude, your way of making fun of your body is too exaggerated, but I like it! Do it again!"

The white bionic robot, which was fighting with Superman, Batman, Wonder Woman, etc., turned at the same time and rushed towards Deadpool.

"Yohoo, it's actually a 7x common group! I feel more energetic! Come on, you little white sluts! My current energy is enough to turn over your 7x libido!"

Deadpool escaped the hot line of sight of No. 1 bionic robot, and then flipped two 360° in the air, and the little ballet jumped into the air.After evading all kinds of bat stabs and bat knives from No. 2 bionic robot, he grabbed its two arms with backhands and kicked its ass. Before it got up, he took out the rocket launcher from behind sent it.

The No. 3 bionic robot moved quickly. Deadpool rested on the ground with one hand and lay on his side. When he saw the phantom, he stretched out his foot again. No. 3 tripped again, this time with the oversized grenade presented by Deadpool.

Number 4...

Barry and Hal stared dumbfounded.

"Is he dancing? Or is he fighting?"

Hal's question did not get a reply from Barry, he was just surprised: "These robots can completely simulate actions just by fighting, but why can't they imitate that Deadpool?"

Superman and Batman also came here, the original center of the battlefield shifted, and all combat power attacks were attracted to Deadpool.

Deadpool seemed to have heard Barry's doubts, and took time out of his busy schedule to reply: "Hey, Miao|Sho baby, brother is unique, watch it."

After posing, Deadpool started to wave.

His legs trembled, his buttocks twisted, "Rub rub, step on the devil's footsteps, rub rub..."

Head lowered, body tilted, a red hot line of sight shot into the air, the waist was pressed down, legs split, the long sword transformed from the left of the robot pierced into the chest transformed from the right, and the double-edged bat transformed from the robot on the right cut off left arms.

"Wow, do you like it, come on, come on!"

The white bionic robots seemed to be irritated, and attacked the past together again.

As soon as Deadpool fell, he stretched his arms back, raised his legs, and kicked another one.

"What are you talking about, jump up!" Deadpool twisted his buttocks towards a white robot embedded in a certain wall: "Shake my milkshake, oh yeah! Shake it back and forth, you know , huh one by one"

A * pronunciation, the white robot's eyes were blazing, and the thermal sight was opened to the maximum. Deadpool met the sword of a certain robot on the opposite side, grabbed the other two attacks, and then sent these fiery little goblins All advanced to the hot line of sight.

The robots twisted together, smashing and smashing into each other.

"Huh, the song is over, I'm really tired." After he stopped moving, he wanted to find a place to sit down, but found a group of people around him.

After seeing a guy in a blue tights with a red cape, he jumped up again in an instant: "Dude, I found you look familiar! Your color scheme and style of painting are obviously not in our comics." of."

Deadpool jumped to Superman's side, touched his chest muscles, and said solemnly: "Except for the red shorts you don't wear outside, why do I think you look so much like that stupid Superman from DC next door?"

flash:"……"

Green Lantern:"……"

Captain Fantastic, who had been silent all this time, spoke up: "He is Superman."

"...!!" Deadpool knelt down in surprise: "Jordan (the screenwriter) was finally driven crazy by me, and sold his poor and cute Deadpool? And he sold it to the DC next door? Forget it, anyway, as long as there is Just take the money. Who is the screenwriter of DC? Will you publish a separate publication? Can you share the royalties of your comics? What about the games you released before? This is not a small sum... "

Just when Deadpool was talking beep beep to himself, the half-human, half-mechanical steel skeleton spoke.

"Your intestines fell to the floor, do you need me to perform emergency surgery for you?"

Deadpool lowered his head and saw his intestines flowing out of his stomach, blood spreading all over the place.

"No, thank you buddy. I've prepared, I numbered them all, just put them in order."

Deadpool's behavior made the heroes around him grit their teeth. After he stuffed his stomach, the people around him looked at him quite strangely.

But he didn't care, he was anxious to discuss the future dividends with DC's screenwriter.But he is still a newcomer, and he will definitely not be able to meet the screenwriter, so he must first find a representative for this kind of problem, so he said to Batman who has been silent: "Bruce, buddy, I have always worked diligently from nine to five." , I am an unkillable mutant, a mercenary, and comic books often sell more than Superman. Have you considered how much salary you should pay me?"

As soon as his words fell, both of them frowned at the same time.

One was the Batman he was facing, and he said in a hoarse but probing voice: "Who are you!"

The other is Superman next to Batman. Because of his contempt and hostility, he has not scanned the face under the mask with x-sight. Now he suddenly heard Bruce, and he turned to look at it reflexively.

Thus, under X's gaze, that handsome and familiar face was exposed.

"Bruce Wayne...!!"

Superman's surprised voice sounded, and then Bruce replied lukewarmly: "Clark Kent."

"..."

Suddenly there was lightning and thunder between the two, and Deadpool on the side didn't care about it, he stood between the two of them: "Hey, even if you two see each other and want to make a date, wait a second, put your crotch first." Put away the weapon erected inside, brother's business is much more important than this!"

As soon as the sound fell, the tall building next to it collapsed.

Deadpool was hit by two people and pushed into the wall.