little miss austin

In fact, Ivo shouldn't have stayed at Austin's house, but it was too late for him to go to the suburbs of London, and it was not good to go to the city in the middle of the night, so he just stayed at Alice's house for one night without paying attention.

The next few days were spent returning to the Gordons' London residence.

Alice was depressed, and he couldn't always make her laugh. He accompanied her outside in the sun and took a walk at noon, and he obviously talked much less than before.

"Ivo." Alice finally noticed that he spoke too little, and he didn't look like him at all, "Thank you for being with me these days."

"This is what I should do, I should be with you, always by your side."

"But you have your own business, you have to go back to school."

"Going to college is not necessary."

"It's better to have a beginning and an end."

"Actually, you know I don't have to finish college, do you?"

"—Yes. But I can't go to college, and if you can go to college and don't finish four years, then I will hate you."

He smiled, "Okay, I see, I will definitely finish college."

They were walking in the woods, where the raspberry bushes hadn't bloomed yet, but there were some wild flowers, little pink flowers, lilac flowers.

Ivo knelt down and picked a few small flowers, "For you."

Small flowers, no fragrance, just open vigorously, is the sound of spring.

There is a scene of spring everywhere, with the young leaves stretching and the grass luxuriant.

With a small bouquet in her hand, Alice was quite at a loss, "Ivo—"

He turned back to look at her, "Huh?"

"My father—" Before he started to speak, he felt a wave of panic in his heart, and couldn't help but burst into tears.

"Do you want to cry?" He hugged her gently, pressing his face against hers, "Cry if you want to cry."

The warm liquid soon splashed on his neck, her tears, her light snort, and the weak voice of her sobbing all made him feel distressed.

"I'm about to lose my father." She said sullenly, "I really can't imagine what it would be like without a father at home. Mom... Mom is very good, but there must always be a father to make a complete family .Mama will be sad, Cathy will be sad, Jane will be sad, and I will be sad. But what can I do? I don't want Daddy to die, no one wants Daddy to die, but I can't help it. There's nothing I can do nor!"

There is no solution to this problem. Birth, old age, sickness and death are a preordained trajectory. People are heading towards "death" from birth. This is a one-way journey. There is no turning back, and there is no way to stop temporarily.

He patted her on the back clumsily, "This is inevitable in life, you can't help it. In the end, we will all die."

"This is really depressing! What do you think people live for?"

"Live and create your own value, so that when the final moment comes, you can proudly say that my life has not been wasted."

"I know that my father's life must not be wasted, but I still hope that he can live a few more years."

Ivo sighed secretly: She should be afraid, but who can not be afraid?No, more like panic than fear, she had grown up under her parents' wing and never really left.In fact, it is difficult for him to understand Alice's fear. In many ways, they are very similar. They are the youngest child, loved by their parents, siblings, and lively and active, so it is normal for him to like Alice. Trust that she feels the same way about him.

He tried to understand her current mood: What would I look like if my father had been ill in bed for a long time and was about to die?

This illusion frightened him, and tears filled his eyes: I can't accept it either!

"Alice, don't be sad, I will always be with you, no matter when, as long as you need me, I will come over, no matter how far I will come. I may... Maybe I am too stupid, I don't know what to do Comfort you. You have to remember, I love you, everything about me is yours, my soul, my body, all belong to you, and my money. I know it’s not right to propose marriage to you at this time. Appropriate, so I'll wait," he lifted her chin, "when you're not so sad, when you grow up a bit."

Just as Alice was about to say something, she heard him continue, "I will make you happy, isn't that what you like about me the most? I promise I won't let you encounter anything that will annoy you, I just want to I want you to be happy all your life."

He took her hand and kissed her palm lightly, "You always said that life is short, enjoy yourself in time, so that when you are so old that you can only use a cane in the future, you can happily recall your life , I feel that life is not in vain. This is very good, and I agree. Last time you said that you don’t want to get married, I think you still haven’t considered it clearly. God’s creations are always in pairs, and males and females are accompanied. We will all look for our missing other half, some people find it, some people never find it in their life. I know you are my other half, even if I know, you can’t hide if you want to.”

Alice looked up at him in surprise.

"Don't look at me like that. I asked your father, and he allowed me to propose to you, but I want to put the proposal in the near future."

"Are you afraid of being rejected?"

"Of course I'm afraid!" He frowned a little bored, "I'm not sure what you're thinking, you've always been different from other girls. Like my sisters, they are always very nervous when it comes to marriage proposals." Shy, but I know how they will react, but you——I don't know any other girls would discuss proposals and marriages with men so calmly. Sometimes I really want to open your little head and look inside What is the structure, how do you think about the problem."

She pondered for a while, and said seriously: "You don't understand."

"I don't really need to understand how you think about problems. Don't always underestimate me," Ivo said dissatisfied: "You seem to think that I am that 13 or 4-year-old boy back then, and I have grown up .You know how men think and solve problems, and when we see something we like a lot, someone we like a lot, we must want to keep it private. Last time—”

He paused for a while, and said reluctantly: "You haven't told me what Oliver told you last time, but I can roughly guess some. He must have wooed you, but you probably will Reject him. Huh, Oliver is an idiot! I should really thank him for his hesitation, he has never understood that some things can be ignored or not fought for, but love cannot. Now, do you think I am the smarter one?"

Alice couldn't refute, thought for a while, nodded, "You are more active than him."

Ivo was very proud, "So don't think about it, I just want to be with you and marry you. Although I don't know why you don't want to get married, it doesn't matter. If it's because of money, I can sign legal papers without using a single penny of yours, and Mr. Lefroy must be able to draw up an excellent legal paper in your favor. I can't think of anything else."

She didn't speak for a long time.

Ivo began to worry, he couldn't figure out why she had any hesitation, he thought he had removed all obstacles: Oliver, or the property after marriage.

He didn't care about Oliver because Oliver obviously didn't get Alice's love; he didn't care about money because he would inherit a considerable amount of property in the future.People who have lived well since childhood don't pay too much attention to money, because they have never been short of money.

"Do you have to get married?"

"Of course." Ivo looked at her in surprise, "Don't you think—how can I live with you and not marry you?"

Alice was a little defeated by him: this man's thinking is really simple and straightforward.

"Wait a minute! I won't even marry you, why do I still live with you?"

"Then what do you mean?"

"It's just—well, one of the reasons I don't want to get married is because I don't want to sleep in a bed with..."

Ivo smiled at first, but soon blushed: "Do you know what 'sleeping together' means?"

"I know!" She glared at him, feeling a little hot on her face, after all, it's not easy to discuss such things.She thought, the two of them are really a little bit—unconventional way.

Sure enough, Ivo sighed, "You are such a strange girl. I have never heard of any lady who would discuss this issue with her fiancé."

"You're not my fiancé yet."

"One day it will be. I can't discuss this issue with you now. Mrs. Austin should tell you. You don't need to understand it now."

"I already know. It's just...um——" She suddenly realized that it was really hard to say it.

"I'll talk about it later." He quickly shied away, "In the future, I will always explain to you clearly what it means to be married and what it means to sleep together."

"It means children."

"--right."

"I don't want to get married and I don't want kids."

Ivo was shocked: "What? What!"

The water of the Chaville River flows slowly, and there are small bridges at intervals on the river, and the small bridges have different shapes.

There is a boat in the river, and the boatman propels the boat and swims briskly on the river.

Ivo was half lying on the boat sullenly, holding a wine glass in one hand, and an ice bucket with half a bottle of wine in it by his lap.

A roll-your-own cigarette is held between the fingers of the other hand.

He couldn't say what the situation was, and he couldn't figure out what emotion he was in.

Puzzled, or shocked?Or both?

Alice was always different from other girls, and that was one of the reasons he loved her.

No, you don't need any reason to love someone, you just love her, you just want her.

He was hit badly, but he had a clearer understanding of what he wanted.

Alice is indeed the kind of person who takes everything into consideration. He hasn't thought about the child yet, but she has already thought about it.Girls are always like this, thinking a lot.Once you understand her real fear, you can understand why she doesn't want to get married.

What he couldn't understand was why she was afraid of having a baby?His older sisters all have children, and if the older sisters make an appointment to go back to their parents' house together, there will be a bunch of children running around in the house noisily.He never felt any danger in procreation.

Don't all women want to have children?It is also unlikely that every woman will encounter some dangerous postpartum hemorrhage or some other deadly infection.His other three older sisters, who were not married, never worried about having children.

Her own older sister, Jane, has also given birth to two children. She is healthy and fine. Why is she so pessimistic that she is afraid?

He never could figure it out.

Wesley has lived in London for several years.

He came to see Alice twice when she was sick, and at least once a week when the Reverend George was sick.

Ivo came to visit Alice, and he saw the two of them walking on the lawn outside, young men and women, young and beautiful, so this relationship was like flowers in the sun, beautiful and full of vitality.

He didn't remember how old Ivo was, but it was probably about the same age as he and Jane back then. He was very young and longed for love, but he didn't know that love would hurt people.

Falling in love is wonderful, but Alice is different from Jane. Jane will be willing to get married when she meets the right person, but Alice is not necessarily.

The girls in the Austin family are very special.

He thought of his youthful love that ended without cause, how Jane had hurt him, and how it had taken him years to get himself out of it.Even now, seeing Jane still makes him feel an inexplicable sense of loss. The happier Jane is, the more he will bring out his failure.

He didn't want to always have anything to do with the Austin family, but in fact, he would always have something to do with the Austin family.

He tried to keep himself as busy as possible, and took over the "London Morning Post" from Henry Austin. He is now the editor-in-chief of the newspaper, and reading manuscripts keeps him busy every day.

That's pretty good.

Pastor George had been ill for more than two months, and finally on the last day of April, he took his last breath.

When the light came back, he asked Alice to be by his side.

"Alice, my baby, my little angel, I am most worried about you. You are a good boy, but not necessarily a good girl in the eyes of others. I am worried about you. I am afraid that no one can really understand you, but You will suffer forever."

"Dad, I probably don't need anyone to understand me."

"Silly boy, you are a girl, you still need to find a man who can love you and take care of you, and spend your life with him. My baby, if you meet that man, you can marry him, and I allow him to ask you proposed."

"dad--"

"Ivo is a good boy, and he will be a good husband. Dad can guarantee this... Oliver, Oliver is good, but you definitely prefer Ivo who is more active," Pastor George smiled kindly: "You and Ivo has known each other since he was a child, it's good, he will keep his vows - it's a pity, I can't hold your hand and take you on the wedding aisle. Good boy, don't cry, Dad will watch you in the sky Yes, Daddy will never leave you."

When Wesley rushed to Austin's house, he met Alice fainted from crying, and was carried back to her bedroom by Jacob.

He freaked out, "Alice!"

Sidney hurried past Jacob, not bothering to salute him.

Wesley managed to grab Kate who was following Sidney, "What's wrong with Miss Alice?"

"She fainted from crying, I have to find smelling salts." Kate also hurried away.

Cathy heard him talking in the corridor and came out of the master bedroom, holding back tears, "Mr. Wesley, thank you for coming."

"What's the matter with Mr. Austin—" He really didn't need to ask this question, and Alice fainted from crying. Obviously, Pastor George had died.

Austin's house was in a hurry, and Henry had just arrived, in time to see his father for the last time;

Eliza knelt beside the bed with Jane, whispering the Lord's Prayer;

The pastor of the nearby church was invited to give Pastor George anointing ceremony and whisper prayers;

Mrs. Austen stood at the end of the bed blankly, looking at her husband on the bed—the dead husband.

Henry was already discussing with Tom Lefroy in a low voice about Pastor George's funeral: to send someone to send a letter to Steventon's eldest brother James, pick up his second brother George, and send someone to send a letter to his third brother Edward in Kent; Sending a letter to the wife of Francis in Southampton, Francis is still on the warship, Mary Gibson has just given birth to her eldest daughter and sent a letter last week; Charles is also on the warship, they will not be back for the funeral, but both Able to send someone to send a letter to notify;

In addition, there are many relatives and friends who need to deliver letters, and some relatives and friends who live close will come to the funeral.

For the rest of the day, the Austins were confirming various matters with each other, and the only person who was not busy was Alice.

She fainted for a few minutes, Jacob carried her back to the room, put her on the bed, she woke up soon.

After waking up, he vomited several times, terrified all three of Jacob and his sister.

The funeral was scheduled for four days later, and the cemetery was on the other side of the Austin family's woods. Last year that land was sold, and Alice bought the land on the other side of the woods.She loves buying land very much. She wants to buy land that is connected together, and she will try her best to buy land that is not adjacent to each other as long as it is sold.

She didn't have any plans for the land at first, but thought of reclaiming it as farmland or building a house. After Pastor George was confirmed dead, she told her mother that the land would be used as a family cemetery, and they would be buried together in the future.

Oliver Bundfield, Julian Bundfield, Evan Holmes, Ivo Gordon, George Byron, Grant Temple all attended the Reverend George's funeral.

The memorial ceremony was first held in a nearby church. After the ceremony, James, Edward, Henry, cousin Thomas, son-in-law Tom, and Ivo, 6 people carried the coffin out of the church, put it in a carriage, and the carriage drove to the cemetery.

Oliver didn't expect that the Austin family would let Ivo, who was neither married nor engaged to Alice, be the pallbearer. Obviously there were other people to choose.

——So, this means that the Austin family has admitted that Ivo will be Alice's husband?

His heart ached.

Alice was ill again, and even the memorial service was barely able to stand firm, and Sidney helped her out of the church.

Alice had been seriously ill in February, and by the time he received the news, she had recovered.He thought about coming to visit her, but when he came, he saw Ivo following her, and he turned around and left in anger.

He shouldn't have gone, and he regrets it now.

Alice was much thinner than the last time she saw him, her chin was pointed, and her face looked even smaller.

In the cemetery, she cried again, out of breath.This was the first time he had seen her cry so sadly, and Ivo——could hug her shoulders, whisper in her ear, and comfort her.

And the Austins don't think there's anything wrong with that at all.

——Ivo was affirmed by Alice's family, and he might have proposed to her before the hospital bed.

Oliver felt that he had fallen into deep jealousy.

Until this day, he did not realize the pain of love that Byron wrote in his poems. Byron's poems may be childish and immature, but the hopeless loss is not adulterated at all.

The sun was shining brightly, but he didn't feel the warmth of the sun at all.

He is a ray of breeze floating outside this world, unnoticed and unseen; his love has been rejected before he paid, he is heartbroken, resents the existence of Ivo, and wishes Alice to hurry up Tell Ivo that she won't get married, and then Ivo will taste disappointment; he wants Ivo to be hurt severely, and Alice has the ability to break his heart, and she has the same ability to break Ivo's heart.

He didn't know how he left the cemetery, and he couldn't quite remember the day he left London. He went back to Cambridge and continued his lessons.

Attend class, end get out of class, go to the library, do homework, write papers.

Eat, sleep, play cricket, play pool.

Drink, smoke, drink a little absinthe, smoke a little weed.

By the third week of June, he graduated with a master's degree.

Alice hadn't written back to him since the funeral, and he still sent her a letter a week, but he couldn't fill a whole sheet of paper now.

Alice didn't reply to anyone's letter, and Byron didn't reply to the letter. Byron also said that she didn't reply to Ivo's letter either.

Alice was ill again, Byron said.

This time she was sick for quite a long time. She had been sick since before the funeral. She fainted, vomited, coughed, sweated at night, and had a low-grade fever.

Ivo went back to London at the end of May, but I heard that Austin's family refused to allow him to see Alice, saying that she was too ill to see guests.Ivo didn't see Alice, so he had to go back to Oxford soon.

Byron returned to London with Oliver, but neither of them saw Alice.

Everyone in the Austin family refused to say what illness Alice had. Oliver sent a servant to observe secretly for a few days, and asked the servant to write down everything that happened in the Austin family and report it to him.

The doctor didn't come, but the Austen family seemed to be preparing to send Alice away to convalesce, the groom went to the blacksmith to re-shoe the horses, the coachman was doing maintenance on the box coach, but he didn't know where he was going;

Jacob went to downtown London to order new suitcases. There are 7 or 8 suitcases in a set. It seems that he is going to live outside for a long time;

Henry and Eliza moved back to London with young Henry and William;

Jane and Tom also moved back to London with Helena and Diana;

Neither Jane nor Henry visited Alice once.

The author has something to say:

*Dad passed away.Reverend George actually died in January 1805.