【Double Black】As You Like It

When Nakahara woke up, he opened his eyes and looked at the dark ceiling of his home and rolled his eyes. The moonlight shone through the thin curtains and sprinkled the fuzzy silver in the room. The soft bed should bring Come to sleep for an extremely comfortable time, but now he has a pair of dark circles under his eyes and sore eyes, and the continuous ringing of the mobile phone rings in his ears, urging him to die like a magic sound piercing his ears.

He lay on the bed and sighed deeply, and then stretched out a hand from under the quilt to touch the things on the bedside table. Generally speaking, his personal mobile phone and work mobile phone are very separated.And there is almost no one who can call him a private mobile phone number in the middle of the night.

Osamu Dazai liked to do this in the past, but getting up in the middle of the night just to make a harassing phone call is really hurting the enemy one thousand and self-defeating eight hundred. After a month of tormenting each other, Dazai resolutely gave up this A very childish behavior.Therefore, Zhongyuan Zhong also turned on the phone in the dark night after going through it in his mind.

The light from the screen almost stung his drowsy eyes, he frowned and blinked twice before realizing that it was an unfamiliar number.Resigning to his fate, he picked up the phone, and there was an earth-shattering cry from the phone.Nakahara Chuya's nerves were all mixed up when the woman's sharp voice came out, he silently listened to the woman crying and calling Dazai Osamu's name, almost choking to the point of fainting, Nakahara Chuya was in the gap made his first sound.

"Miss, you have made a wrong call. Osamu Dazai's number is XXX-XXXXXXX."

After finishing speaking, he comforted the lady who was crying terribly and hung up the phone, and Zhongyuan Zhong, who was lying on the bed in his apartment again, could not sleep anymore. He opened his eyes and looked at the ceiling of his house, holding his hands Li's cell phone was smashed out.

It has been several days because of hostile forces that I have not closed my eyes. The business direction that Hong Kong gangsters need is not just the armed struggle that ordinary people understand. When I was 15 years old, I was taken by Ozaki Koba to watch the so-called fight on the dining table.Playing with the brain seems to be particularly exhausting, and the mental state after the turnaround is not as good as usual when facing everything.

——For example, in the face of insomnia.

Zhong Yuanzhong, who was lying on the bed, stretched out his fingers and pressed his eye sockets, the bloodshot crawling up the whites of the eyes made the surrounding nerves start to ache.After pondering over the range of actions of the Armed Detective Agency recently, after careful deliberation, he realized that this was the result of Osamu Dazai deliberately throwing his private mobile phone number to those poor cheated women.

The rare sleep time has been completely destroyed, and the two of them have not seen each other for more than half a year.Even if they are in the same city, but the venues for their activities are completely different. Yokohama has a huge area, so it is not difficult to avoid seeing each other.

There was no news or communication, just knowing that Osamu Dazai, who had left his original identity and status, had found a place where he could regain his footing and stay.Occasionally, when drinking with Guangjin Liulang, I would question where else other than Gang Hei could fit the giant Buddha.Guangjin Liulang, who can be regarded as the elder of the two dynasties, held his wine glass and thought for a while before replying tentatively.

——Perhaps there is no place where you can’t really stay.

The truth is this, even minors who are in school can understand this kind of thing.But maybe it was because of alcohol, Nakahara Chuya really couldn't figure out how big the scope of this "non-existence" was during that time.He poured expensive wine down his throat, the sour taste washed away the last sweetness under the tongue coating, the neon lights flickered at night were projected on the dark sea, occasionally the drunken Zhong Yuanzhong would lie outside the bar When he was in front of the glass window, he couldn't tell whether the sparkling water was the sea, or the ceiling he saw first when he woke up in the middle of the night.

He said, maybe it is, but for Osamu Dazai, there are always exceptions.

The approachable 22-year-old youth with a smile on his face will say that he wants to commit suicide full of vigor, but the youth who was called double black at the time seems to never let people imagine such a speech.Even Mori Ogai would lament that the previous sentence had changed a lot when facing a person who looked white and clean after taking off his black trench coat, but from the beginning to the end, he felt that this Osamu Dazai who seemed to have a funny brain and the one in his eyes There is no difference between cadres who hold guns and torture prisoners.

The old man sitting next to him would ask him what he felt uncomfortable about.But Nakahara just wanted to say that he was not feeling well anywhere.

This kind of discomfort is indescribable and inexplicable, indescribable and indescribable.But in the end, it seems that he is the only one who is tortured by this feeling, drinking bitter but outrageously expensive wine, and doing a job that ordinary people don't understand but he is willing to do.Behind his back, Osamu Dazai laughed and scolded him as a terrifying mafia who killed people without batting an eyelid, but when he heard this sentence for the first time, he was not angry, but suddenly shocked.

Zhongyuan Zhong also thought, we are about the same, you Dazai Osamu can really say this kind of words.

But if you think about it carefully, it is probably wrapped in malicious ridicule, which is the indescribable swelling sourness.

He said to Guangjin Liulang, I just can't understand his appearance of leaving himself clean, and his face that has made a clean break with the past.

But after he finished speaking, he felt that the words were a little unbelievable and should not belong to his selfishness, so he poured all the wine in his hand down his throat, and finally endured the rush of the smell of alcohol, Tasting the strong bitter taste between his lips and teeth, he put the wine glass on the bar counter calmly at the end, walked outside the house alone and opened the window, facing the sea at night in Yokohama, only then did he think of himself when he heard those words, What words to use to describe.

That should be.

——It's heart-cooling.

The wind blowing into his clothes made the hem of his vest fly wildly. He felt that although Osamu Dazai was annoying, if he really left to live a more suitable life, he should still be applauded as his former partner.After all, one should hope for the good of others, and not always worry about the bad life of others.Guangjin Liulang agreed with him, so he told him that maybe it was just Mr. Dazai's unintentional words.

But Chuya Nakahara cursed in his heart to put his fart on Osamu Dazai, it is impossible for this person to have any "maybe" "unintentional words".The other party was deliberately piercing his heart with a soft knife, deliberately showing him the fact that he was out of the quagmire and living a chic life.

"So, Mr. Chuya, what you care about is that the other party says you are an evil mafia?"

"Of course it's not such a low-level concern..."

I can't explain clearly and I don't know where to start. If I really talk about that thought, Nakahara Chuya himself will feel panicked.

I have actually heard all kinds of vicious insults during the years when I partnered with the other party, and I have not experienced unsavory, extremely vile, and even those vulgar and sexually suggestive words.He used to think that all he cared about was his partner leaving quietly, but in the end, under the influence of alcohol, he realized that he was facing the sea that seemed to be lit by golden lights.

In fact, what he really cares about is that Osamu Dazai has changed from "accused murderer with him" to "a sanctimonious bystander who mocked him".

Realizing this, Zhong Yuanzhong was also shocked for a moment.He was shocked by his own thoughts, and also by the fact that a line was drawn between him and Osamu Dazai. At the end of the line, he was still in the original place with light, but in essence he was still mired in the quagmire. It was a solid cage, and a piece of carrot was caught in front of him. He knew that the carrot was real, but he couldn't know when he would really get it from the beginning to the end.

But Osamu Dazai is different, the other side of the line is an area beyond his reach, neither envy nor jealousy, nor longing and longing.It's just that he knows that the side that can't be touched is the reason for Osamu Dazai to leave.

It's not that he has to drag people into the water, but this person can be anyone, but Dazai Osamu always makes him feel a thorn in his heart.But if I really want to say this kind of thought, I feel that it is nothing more than mediocrity.It's like some thoughts that can't get out of the corner, and it's like negative emotions caused by the imbalance in my heart.So in the end, Zhongyuan Zhong didn't say anything or explain anything, he just thought that if he himself would not regret it, then the other party should not regret it either.

He won't regret betraying the organization, won't regret breaking the relationship with his partner, and naturally won't regret anything he said to him.

It seems that from the time when they first met at the age of 15, most of the two people have tit-for-tat, big or small.It's been a fight all the time, but Dazai Osamu always knows how to step on the top of the line, half of his foot is outside the line, but it can make Nakahara not really want to kill him, but always Tolerated, tolerated until now.

Thinking about it this way, I can indeed feel Osamu Dazai's intelligence and fearlessness.Maybe it's not just pure confidence, but a kind of self-confidence after over-understanding.

Confident that he would tolerate it in the Central Plains, and realizing this, he really wanted to scold himself for something, but after a few glasses of wine, these thoughts that had no clue at all were scattered, and there was nothing left.

After so many years, Lin Lin always found out about this man's defection when he came back from abroad four years ago, and when he returned home, he found his car that had been blown up.Now when I think about it again, that car that I used to like very much has become a photo placed in the ruins of memory. When I think about it, I will pull out the past that happened in the Dragon Head War, and the two stand side by side Shoulder, the other party would accuse him of coming too slowly, but he felt that Osamu Dazai talked too much, and it was expected that he would receive a few more punches.

Saying that you don't need the other party but feel awkward when there is really no one to partner with.Occasionally, when I was on a mission, I would deliberately talk to the air around me to start a topic, but it was only after I made the first sound that I realized that this person had left.

It took some time to get used to it, Ozaki Koyo asked him if he needed to arrange another one, and at that time Nakahara was already able to smoke, so he pressed the cigarette butt out in the ashtray in front of his most respected eldest sister, then shook his head Refused.

This is not out of anger but because I really don't want it, I just feel that everyone around me is very wrong.But it's not because he misses someone or something. For Chuya Nakahara, hypocritical thinking is simply a fantasy. To put it bluntly, there are too few people who admit it.

Hirotsu Yanagi once said that the relationship between Mr. Chuya and Mr. Dazai is really good, but Nakahara Chuya really thinks that the old man's eyesight is not good when he is old, but he can't be as eloquent when facing elders as he is in front of annoying people Unobstructed, so he retorted that this is nothing, he and I really don't get along.

He withdrew from the wind that smelled of fishy sea water, and returned to the dimly lit bar with his arms full of mist. The black leather gloves he took off were thrown aside, and his fingers reached into the wine glass to stir the orange wine and squares. ice cubes, and then said to the subordinates in the audience, I have invited this drink today.

He doesn't care much about things outside his possessions, he likes the most expensive drinks, he likes the best-looking sports cars, and he doesn't even mind what the shiny sports cars maintained in his garage will look like in the hail of bullets when he is on a mission.When the two were together, most of the subordinates were more willing to become Chuya’s subordinates. Osamu Dazai once said slowly, Chuya, you are really easy to buy people’s hearts. At that time, Chuya, who was only ten years old, It was the dagger in his hand that was thrown in front of the man slumped on the sofa, and it was caught as expected.

"What's bothering you?"

Osamu Dazai didn't speak or express any opinion, just smiled at him.It's hard to tell what kind of emotion is in that smile, but it makes Zhongyuan Zhong very uncomfortable anyway.

He didn't find it interesting if he didn't delve into it, until after Osamu Dazai left, it seemed that no one in Koheri felt sad for this person's departure except him.

It can be said that it is sad but it is not accurate. After all, Zhongyuan Zhong was also really happy and opened a bottle of 89 Petrus.If I have to say it, this kind of mood is more incredible.He didn't react until after the incident happened. He was the only one who had great emotional fluctuations about Osamu Dazai's betrayal.

Except for the overly persistent type of Akutagawa Ryunosuke, no one feels sorry or misses it, at most it's just a sigh.

Guangjin Liulang patted him on the shoulder and said don't think too much about drinking the bar, he smiled and licked his fingers with his tongue clean, then raised his lips and opened a good bottle in front of everyone Champagne, built a rather spectacular champagne tower with superpowers, and told the whole room that he would not be drunk tonight.

Celebrating the success of a three-month phased mission and the fourth anniversary of Osamu Dazai's rebellion.It's just that he is the only one who knows that this day represents two meanings. People who don't know are carnivaling under the influence of alcohol. The orange light seems to be able to illuminate the various aspects of life under the dark night, and Zhong Yuan is also sipping Holding the handle of the thin wine glass between his lips, he clinked glasses with the person beside him.The crisp sound of glass crashing shattered all the turbulent emotions covered under the skin. He handed himself over to alcohol, drank and laughed all night with the cheers of the crowd.

After drinking until the early hours of the morning, it was rare that he didn't go crazy with alcohol, and he was quite sober despite the cold night wind. He returned to the apartment alone, dragged his tired body, washed up with the smell of alcohol, and went to bed, thinking that finally After completing this staged task, he could really rest for a few days, but he was woken up by a harassing phone call. Before that, he hadn't closed his eyes properly for more than a week.

With a splitting headache and an extremely bad mood, even after celebrating just now, I still feel severe brain pain.Zhong Yuanzhong, who had been unable to sleep, got up from the bed and sat down. There was a faint layer of moonlight on the floor. He thought that he hadn’t looked up to appreciate the moon for a long time, and not only the moon, but everything around him seemed to be Ignored by him in the past.

Life without Osamu Dazai's interruption should be more relaxed and colorful.

Patients with insomnia in the middle of the night will always think about what is there, it is like being far away from the hustle and bustle of the world and the noise of the world. When you stop, you can think about other things, those top-ranked things that you don't have time to even find time to do.

Zhong Yuanzhong also sat in front of the window and looked at the broken mobile phone on the ground. The mobile phone card chip that fell out of it gave off a cold light.He blinked in the dark shadows, then nestled back into the soft bedding as if relieved.

In the past, in the Central Plains, there was never time to think about those gossips, and there was even no time to relax.His time was given to the task and the city, to the things he should do, to the things that could make his existence meaningful.But I really want to think about those issues that should have been clarified a few years ago, but they have always been pressed in the back of my mind and never mentioned.It's not that I don't want to pay attention to it, nor is it that I forget it on purpose, but it's just that it's not my turn to arrange it along the way.

But in this silent night, after all, when it was time to take it out and deal with it, Zhong Yuan thought that he still had to struggle, but when he actually faced it, he was extremely relaxed, so easy that even he was surprised.

Maybe it's because it's been too long.The restlessness and unwillingness back then have become dispensable, his sour eyes and bitter throat are only caused by insomnia and drunkenness, not because of anything else, and not because of him being Dazai anymore .

Thinking of the insomnia night that should have a splitting headache, he gradually became drowsy. He remembered that when he raised his glass a few hours ago, he said 'I wish you all success and success'.But in my heart I said yes.

——I wish you no regrets in the future.