[HP] Can you be gentle with me

Memory is memory after all.

Or, these are all his dreams.

Snape opened his eyes sharply, after the darkness just now.

Sitting up slowly, looking around, he found that this was his office, he was lying on the sofa, and Tahlia was sitting on another chair beside him.

At this moment, she looked calm, holding a book in her hand and reading it seriously.

Snape stared at Tahlia for a while, he was in a state of confusion now, the calm Tahlia in front of him was completely different from the sad Tahlia he remembered before, and after learning the truth, he now had no idea how to face her no more──

In any case, it was impossible for him to directly say all the things he had thought of in the past, and the fact that they got along so well now was based on the fact that this matter was not exposed to the sun, and he could be sure that if he told Tahlia Mentioning it, even just mentioning it, will make all his hard work over the years go to waste──

"Are you awake?" Tahlia's voice suddenly reached his ears, abruptly interrupting Snape's thoughts, and he turned his head unconsciously.

Snape noticed that Tahlia hadn't looked up at all, but he seemed to have realized that he had woken up earlier, and continued to turn the pages of the book with his right hand without pausing.

Barely suppressing the panic in his heart, Snape coughed lightly.

"I'm sorry." And before he could stop himself, the words came out.

"Huh?" Tahlia raised an eyebrow, and finally looked away from the book, looking at Snape amusedly. "Are you sorry?" she continued, putting the book aside casually. "for what?"

Snape didn't know how to answer.

It should be said that he knew that he couldn't say the real reason why he said this sentence-maybe in Tahlia's eyes, his apology was only because he passed out without warning and caused her trouble.

In the end, he didn't answer the question, part of the reason was because Tahlia stood up after asking the question, she didn't seem to expect much from him to answer, went straight to the big table beside her, took a glass full of water It came over and handed it to Snape.

"How long have I been asleep?" Snape asked after taking a few sips from the glass of water.

"A few hours, I think..." Tahlia shrugged. "Not long—"

"A few hours?" Snape murmured. "It feels longer."

It turned out that only a few hours had passed... But he always had the feeling that he had lived through several years again. Since that memory came back to his mind, everything in these years seemed clear but blurred. All of his thoughts had to be rethought, he couldn't pretend he didn't know anything, and he couldn't go on thinking that maybe things weren't as bad as he thought--he was an asshole, and Tahlia was right, he was.

He should be the one in his mouth who is not worthy of living in this world.

"Maybe you're tired." Tahlia said flatly. "How long has it been since you had a good night's sleep?"

Snape froze for a few seconds, then frowned.

He could hardly remember the last time he was actually in bed - first when the Dark Lord ordered him to research the potion that would make the Philosopher's Stone fully functional, then when Tahlia asked him to tamper with the potion Afterwards, he was annoyed because Tahlia was about to face the Dark Lord alone. Although he insisted on following in the end, he never really let go—

Just because Tahlia almost died.

In the past few days, he has not thought about rest at all, not to mention that in the past two days, he has almost used up all his free time to brew those six bottles of magic softener. If Tahlia hadn't asked such a question, he would have planned to continue Head buried in the potions room...

"I'm worried about our future plans, Snape, in your physical condition where you're about to pass out at any moment." Tahlia's voice floated faintly into her head. "It looks like I'm not the only one suffering from health problems, should I be relieved?"

"I've been busy lately," Snape said quietly.

Tahlia didn't say anything more, just slowly sat back on the sofa where she was originally sitting, and didn't seem to intend to ask any more questions.

Snape thought the topic was over, but after Tahlia spoke again, he unconsciously froze in place again.

"I think you should take a good rest for a few days...for your health—"

Snape couldn't believe it.

He almost suspected that he had heard wrong...

And Tahlia seemed to realize what she said, and shut her mouth in embarrassment.

"I still have lessons to attend." He said pretending to be calm, and glanced at the clock on the wall, only to realize that he seemed to have missed his Potions class in the third year - no one came to ask him? "Just now I--

"I went to class, if that's what you want to ask." Tahlia replied with a slight cough. "You know... I'm your TA after all—" After a pause, he finally decided not to tell Snape the mixed expressions of joy and surprise the students had seen her walk into the classroom.

She looked up, and was surprised to find that Snape was looking straight at her, which made her uncomfortable. "I mean, as I said just now, you seem tired──I didn't intend to wake you up... It should be said that I didn't teach you a lesson..." After speaking, the volume gradually faded away. So small as to be inaudible.

Look at what she's rambling about now!

Tahlia turned her head away, feigning a sudden and unusual interest in the book she was holding.

She wasn't worried about Snape...not really.

She was just frightened by his sudden collapse on the ground unconscious.

As far as she could remember, Snape had never been so out of order, passed out without warning, unable to wake up no matter how much he screamed—

Tahlia couldn't help but feel that she might have offended Merlin today...

First met Quirrell provoking her in the corridor, and then even Snape passed out here, it was tiring enough for her to deal with Quirrell without anyone noticing, let alone Snape who was completely asleep-

That's right, Snape fast asleep!

She thought he had been hurt, but after careful inspection, she was annoyed to find that he was just asleep!Right in the hallway!suddenly!Sleeping in complete disregard of other people's convenience!Go!up!

Thinking, Tahlia jerked her head up, glaring at Snape fiercely. "Do you know how much trouble you've caused me?"

To her astonishment, Snape's eyes widened instantly after hearing this accusation, his face full of horror, and he didn't say anything for a while.

Just staring at her like that.

As if he really did something sorry for him.

"Snape?" The realization made her feel uncomfortable again.

It's true that Snape did a lot of things, he remembered, he forgot, many, many things──but even if he fully remembered what he did, it's impossible for him to put on this expression, on the contrary, maybe he still will feel elated──

"What are you doing?" Thinking, she asked again.

"It's nothing." Snape unconsciously clenched his robe with both hands, but replied flatly.

No.

Of course it was impossible for Snape to think nothing of it... He knew that what he had done was unforgivable - reason told him to leave Tahlia so she wouldn't get hurt any more, but he couldn't.

He will never be able to do it.

"Nothing." He forced a smile and repeated. "Perhaps I should really sleep for a while."

"Okay." Tahlia shrugged, then stood up indifferently and planned to leave. "There will be an advanced class later, I think I have to prepare first..."

Snape stared blankly at Tahlia who put down her doubts for a moment and really planned to leave here, and couldn't help but find out with horror that everything Tahlia said earlier was true.

She really didn't ask him anything...even though he often lied to her, he knew he was uncomfortable reacting—

But she still didn't ask any questions.

"Wait." Snape blurted out.

Tahlia stopped in front of the door, turning her head suspiciously. "What else is there?"

"I'm hiding something from you." Snape coughed softly, not surprised to see Tahlia raise an eyebrow after hearing his words. "But I give you my word." He stared straight at Tahlia. "I promise, I won't keep it from you forever."

Tahlia froze for a few seconds, and maintained a somewhat stiff movement for a while, before suddenly regaining consciousness and shaking her head. "As you please," she said. "I don't really want to know──" After finishing speaking, Feiya left the room and closed the door, looking like he was running for his life.

Snape closed his eyes.

Maybe it's a good thing for him now that Tahlia hastily left.

After he woke up from the memory dream, the guilt that he felt less strongly began to eat into his head quickly, and even made him unable to continue to face her—even if he pretended to be calm and talked to her, he could not suppress his heart Horrible guilt.

Every word he uttered, every word he uttered, just kept turning into sharp knives, every word stabbing back at his ears, reminding him how unworthy he really was to talk to Tahlia.

It gave him a headache.

Very painful.

Snape pressed hard on the temple with one hand, the headache wasn't just because of the guilt he felt facing Tahlia just now, it seemed to have a lot to do with his recovery of memory.

Tahlia's forgetfulness cast was successful, but he forcefully broke through her spell in an unexplainable way and recalled everything—

Did Quirrell do something—?

No, it couldn't be him, Snape was sure the guy wasn't up to it.

So, that's the only explanation left for the bug to show up when he and Tahlia cast Forget Nothing on the same object at the same moment, isn't it?

It seemed that Tahlia hadn't expected this result at all. If she knew it would lead to this result, she would never have suggested it to him.

Snape opened his eyes sharply.

He seemed to suddenly think of something very important, and that thing seemed irrelevant to the question he was thinking about before, but he was sure that maybe he thought about it right this time.

Nigel.

He was definitely Tahlia's son, and now—Snape tried to shake off the guilt that was still in his mind—and now...

If Lucius Malfoy had been wrong from the start and misled himself—

If Tahlia and Sirius Black never had the relationship he imagined—

Snape gasped.

Everything matches!

The kid's age...and his apparent talent for potions—

It is impossible to have such a surprising coincidence in this world, all the evidence points to the same fact, even though this fact once again made him astonished and shocked──

Nigel, most likely, is his own child.