born to you

During adolescence, most of the middle and second graders will think about the following questions:

who am I?

where am i from?

Where am I going?

Although He Jing is not in the second class, he is not immune to the vulgar. Apart from exploring the origin of life as usual, he is still thinking about an important question that will run through his life:

Do I like the same sex or the opposite sex?

Rome wasn't built in a day, and He Jing's sexuality wasn't determined suddenly.After he had such doubts about himself, it took at least half a month of proof and reasoning to confirm, oh, I just don’t like women, I’m not interested in them.

He Jing, who was still in the rebellious period, got a little excited, because this might be the most unorthodox thing about him except for the fights he had in primary school.

However, Li Qi didn't have such a bold request for evidence and carefully collected evidence. He knew from the first moment he saw Zhang Ju'an, oh, I like men, and I'm interested in him.

This kind of straightforwardness and rudeness saved Li Qi a lot of trouble and embarrassment in seeking proof, which is perfect for a gay guy.

Therefore, it is no exaggeration to say that Zhang Juan is the cinnabar mole on Bai Yueguang's heart in front of his window, although he is also one of the best lifelong friends of his brother.

But it was this relationship that made him suppress his heart, and only think about that person in his heart on certain nights when his youth was mixed with soaring emotions, and his brain and hand speed burst to the commanding heights of emotion.

When I fell, I felt dirty again, and I had such thoughts about my brother's friend, and then I was ashamed for nothing.

To be honest, Li Qi has never been able to associate Zhang Juan, a person with good character and learning, with a person like his brother and Zhao Feng, who has nothing to say about other than being delicate and expensive, and he never thought about it. The two people who talk and do things carelessly will play together with Zhang Ju'an, who is as elegant as a bluegrass painted with ink and ink on the tip of a pen.

The first time he met Zhang Ju'an was when Li Zuo was working part-time in a bar. At that time, Li Zuo was not well-known, he didn't get many resources, and he didn't have much money, so he had to go around.

Li Zuo went to a new place that day, it was quiet, the guests inside were very peaceful, just silently listening to the hoarse love songs of the future superstar on the stage, either laughing or secretly licking the wound.

Only Zhang Juan is different.

He was wearing a school uniform and sitting side by side with Zhao Feng. He clearly had a pretty smile on his lips, but it always made people feel neither sad nor happy. The song is heard in the soul.

Li Qi stared at his red lips as he sipped his wine glass, rolled his throat, and swallowed a restless saliva.

Zhao Feng was always absent-minded, and when he saw Li Qi from a distance, he hurriedly greeted him.

Li Qi used to sit next to Zhao Feng, quietly looking at Zhang Juan through the crowd.

Zhao Feng is not very knowledgeable, so he ordered a drink list and placed it in front of Li Qi, recommending juice to him.

Li Qi is just at the embarrassing age of 14 years old, why is it embarrassing?It's because only in this life, only at this age would he be domineering and eager to prove himself. If he was a little older, he would politely smile and reject Zhao Feng's proposal, if he was a little younger, he would obey.

But unfortunately.He raised his eyebrows like a cannon stick, fully reflecting the shadow of the descendants of the door on him: "Don't treat me like a child! What your friend drinks looks good to me, order me a glass."

In the next second, Zhang Juan held the glass with his white hand and put the glass of blended wine in front of Li Qi, with slender fingers and a red mole on the little knuckle of his left hand.

Li Qi was puzzled, Zhang Juan smiled at him, and gently persuaded him: "It's not that I treat you like a child, but that this wine is really bad, you'll know after one sip."

Li Qi took a sip as expected, his thin lips were right on Zhang Juan's previous lip print.

"So-so." Li Qi muttered, and stopped clamoring for the same style. He returned the wine glass and said to Zhao Feng, "I still want a glass of orange juice."

Zhao Feng stretched out his hand to call the bartender, showing his willingness to work hard.

Li Qi looked at the school uniform on Zhang Juan, and said with a smile: "I have been to so many places with my brother, is this the first time I see someone wearing a school uniform to play?"

Zhang Ju'an smiled calmly: "To be honest, I didn't think about coming here today, but no one at home just happened to not bring the house key, so I followed here in desperation." Then, after knowing it, he said, "You are Li Zuo's younger brother?"

Li Qi smiled, his handsome face was less childish, but full of domineering: "Yes, my name is Li Qi. How about you?"

"Zhang Ju'an. Gong Chang Zhang, Ju of 'Guan Guan Jujiu', An of 'Chang'an does not make people worry'." Zhang Ju'an memorized poems at his fingertips, with a face that was neither humble nor overbearing and just right. .I just don’t know whether it’s a different verse or a fixed collocation every time the name is introduced.

Li Qi didn't care how it changed, he just secretly slandered and said "Chang'an's An" directly, wouldn't it be enough?

But I have to say that Zhang Juan's sour appearance as a literary man really tickles his heart.No wonder there were so many marriages between civil and military officials in ancient times. He, a descendant of a military family who has not been to the battlefield but has the blood of two generations of soldiers, actually sees this kind of academics with enthusiasm.

They all flow downhill.

Li Qi changed his sitting position under the bar uncomfortably. Fortunately, the lights here were dim and no one noticed his embarrassing change.

That night, in his dream, he married Zhang Ju'an, who fell in love with him just by looking at him. When he woke up, he was both excited and embarrassed.

However, Li Zuo seemed to be relieved when he came, but he laughed at him sarcastically: "Yo, our family Li Qi is going to become an adult! Congratulations, congratulations, congratulations! Come and tell me, who was the beauty in my dream last night?" ah?"

I'm afraid I'm going to scare you to death!

Li Qi glared at him, then turned around and threw all his sheets, bedding, pajamas and pajamas into the washing machine.

Li Zuo asked for nothing, went back to the house to write the score with breakfast, and didn't come out until noon.

Li Qi also came home from school, and the psychological and physical changes made him inexplicably irritable, so he brought two portions of beef powder for Li Zuo to survive.

Li Zuo had been brainstorming all morning. When the young master smelled the aroma of the soup, he turned into a puff of smoke and flew away. He rushed over and started to eat while he was eating, and said to Li Qi: "Yes. Already, from tonight onwards you, Brother Ju An, will come to our house to stay for a while."

Li Qi almost choked on the soup and coughed for a long time before he recovered. He blushed and asked, "Why do you want to live here suddenly? Our house is so small now, where will we live when we come here? The sofa in the living room is not good, it is too small." Still disgusting..."

"Stop, stop, stop, master!" Li Zuo interrupted him, "He lives with me, he doesn't have to sleep on the sofa, do you think your brother is so like Li Papi? The kind of friend who makes people sleep on the sofa? His house It’s because my parents are not at home recently, and he doesn’t know how to cook, so I was thinking about letting him come and live here, it just so happens that you don’t have much trouble cooking as an extra person..."

Li Qi nodded: "It doesn't take much effort, but it doesn't take much effort."

So that night, he used all the attainments he had cultivated in the kitchen at that time, and cooked a meal for Zhang Juan with all his money.

Li Zuo was about to roll his eyes out, and patted Zhang Juan's thin back: "Look, my brother is really looking forward to seeing you! I haven't seen so many dishes in a week at home! There is soup..."

Zhang Juan smiled at Li Qi, and replied to Li Zuo, "I like your brother quite a lot, too."

A mushroom cloud exploded in Li Qi's mind.

He even thought about whose name to fill in when he bought a house in the future. How many children to adopt and whose surname should be filled in.

In just one week, he began to have a crazy crush on Zhang Juan, and even expressed his inner thoughts euphemistically: "Brother Juan, I think it's fine now, what do you think?"

Zhang Juan just finished reading a Chinese-English double translation of "Notre Dame de Paris". He closed the book lightly, looked at the fragrant flowers and birds singing outside the window, and then looked at Li Qi with anger in his eyes: "I also feel very happy." Good. You, you, are very good people, and I wish I could go on like this for the rest of my life."

Li Qi looked at the sparkle in his eyes, thinking that his first love had just begun.

But whenever he wants to make further progress, Zhang Juan will shrink back. When he wants to retreat and give up, Zhang Juan will suddenly pull him and let him move forward, so it goes back and forth for two years .

On the day when the entrance examination was over, Li Zuo found an excuse to evade the agent, and drove Zhang Juan and Zhao Feng to pick up Li Qi outside the examination room by himself.

Li Zuo's status is special, so Zhao Feng went to the basement with him to park the car, and helped cover it by the way. Zhang Juan and Li Qi went home first.

In the two years of subtle influence, Li Qi no longer has the unrestrained appearance of wanting to be beaten, but has learned Zhang Juan's tranquility and gentleness by ten percent. Knowing that this is just an illusion he deliberately created, Li Qi inside is still a child of an aristocratic family.

Li Qi finally articulated the accumulated thoughts of the past two years, and he softly said a sentence of incomparable affection: "Ju An, I got good grades in the recruitment this time, and I should be able to pass the entrance examination."

Zhang Juan smiled and said congratulations.

"I didn't take the exam because I was number one in the city! It's because this is the school you went to!" Li Qi was a little anxious, but he didn't know what he was anxious about, "I will follow your They walked one by one, and finally stood shoulder to shoulder with you. Ju An, can you consider...to be my boyfriend?"

Zhang Juan opened his eyes wide: "I'm honored that you like me, but I've always only regarded you as my younger brother?"

Zhang Ju'an made a lot of effort in twos and twos, pushing away Li Qi's heavy confession and his heart that had been suppressed for two years with just one sentence.

Zhang Juan said that he was going abroad soon, and he would not and could not accept his wishes.

The most important thing is that it is really unacceptable for two men to be together.

Li Qi was like this, after you chased me for two full years, he gloriously let go of his first love.

On the day when he received the recruitment notice, Li Qi felt that he was a joke, and in a disheartened mood, there was no Li Zuo who mocked him, no more Zhao Feng who was chirping, and no more pushing him to let him apply a layer called gentle and delicate. Zhang Juan of the mask.

He could only be depressed and melancholy for the whole summer vacation in his home, which was still decorated in the style of ancient Tang Dynasty.

Only Zhou Tingting came to him, and only Zhou Tingting was lucky enough to be the listener.

After throwing out all the confusion in my heart, I still have to go to school and complete the life that needs to continue.Almost all of his adolescence was spent thinking about "am I straight or crooked", which is not conducive to social development. Obviously he still has "who am I", "where do I come from", "where am I going?" Go" These three more difficult problems are to be solved.

On the first day of the first year of high school, he went a little late, which was mixed with the time when the senior students entered the school.

The grade director of the second year of high school was pulling a student to ask the barber next to him to shave his head with a look of cannibalism.

Standing next to this is a proud and upright person with a really handsome face, a really good temperament, and a really impatient expression on his face.

Li Qi swears that this is the second time in his life that he has seen someone who can wear a white and unattractive high school uniform so formally and eye-catching.

The first one was his heartache, let alone mention it.

Strange to say, this man has a cold face, the contours of his face are sharp to almost harsh angles, if it weren't for the modification of the gold-rimmed round glasses that softened him a bit, the cold light in his eyes would have frozen his eyes. Up to ten cows.

The pain in his heart is not like this, that person is always humble and benevolent, watching all people and things like nine heavenly gods and Buddhas, definitely not like the person in front of him, who treats everything like dust.

But the temperament of these two people is strangely similar, whether it is the arrogance when standing up or the ease when leaving, they are generally the same.

Li Qi felt that his first love would probably have an explanation.

The author has something to say:

This chapter mainly talks about Li Qi's perspective - Youth (Dream) Spring (Middle) Year (Love) Young (People)

This is what He Jing is most disappointed with Li Qi

Jing Jing has always felt that he is the most unique existence in this world (in fact, to put it bluntly, he is forever young and forever in the second grade), so he cannot accept this kind of stand-in!

Jingjing: I treat you like a boy, and you fucking take me as a stand-in?Go to hell!

This is Jingjing's tangled and complicated heart.

By the way, Jing Jing scolded Li Qi in her heart while crying...

But this volume is still from the perspective of subject and subject, only one chapter is from Li Qi’s perspective, and the next chapter will continue to fifty chapters (—3—)