The ten-year trace of the soul of chess

The man lying on the sofa was a little out of shape compared to a few months ago.

There were wounds at the corner of his mouth, and there were patches of mottled bruises on his bare/exposed skin, as if they had just formed.

Perhaps it was the effect of alcohol, after the man was brought back to the apartment by the light, he fell asleep all the time.But even when he fell asleep, his brows were still furrowed, as if he was restless in sleep.

What happened to this person?What about his family?Does his family know his current condition?

After hearing Liang mentioned the name "Yiecheng Xiuer", Guang Zeng specifically looked up his information and even searched his chess records.

Judging from the chess records alone, Xie Xiuer's chess style is fierce, and he is especially good at attacking. As long as he finds a chance to take advantage of it, he will go straight to Huanglong.However, unlike most attacking chess players, the Go of Shuer is often thick and fine like spring wind and rain.When the enemy thought that his pawns were on the move and they had no time to look after them, and were ready to counterattack in one fell swoop, he had already formed a large array of immortals invisibly, luring the enemy deep.

Especially the chess match between him and Kuwamoto Inbo in the new first stage.The entire chess game, although the old man had been leading the rhythm at the beginning, but as soon as the layout was completed, the situation on the chessboard changed instantly. The black chess formed into the game broke into the white chess camp like a kamikaze, and the white chess formation was caught off guard... …

It is such a chess player who is free and unrestrained, unrestrained, what kind of experience can destroy the high-spirited young chess player in the photo into the haggard appearance he describes today?It seems that the soul has been sucked dry, leaving only a walking dead body.

As He Gu said, is it because of his homosexuality being exposed?

Guang was staring at the man on the sofa in a daze, when the phone on the table vibrated suddenly.

Seeing that it was Liang's phone, Guang was startled, and quickly covered the phone.Seeing that Jie Chengxiuer hadn't woken up yet, he tiptoed into the room to answer the call—today is the first day of the second round of war chess between Liang Mingren and others.It seems to have become a habit.Whenever one of the Bright Lights was unable to come home that night, they would make a phone call that night.It's not about reporting the itinerary of the day, because during the chess game, it is rare to talk about Go-related topics, it seems that just hearing the opponent's voice will make you feel at ease.

On the other end of the phone, Ting Liang was also worried about his sleeping position, one head was bigger than two.

Just as he nodded repeatedly, he vaguely heard the movement in the entrance. He only poked his head for a glance, and before he could hang up the phone, he hurried to the entrance to grab the man who was about to leave: "You look like this, where else do you want to go?"

Hearing Guang's slightly anxious words through the mobile phone, Liang's voice suddenly sank: "Guang, you..."

"I'll call you later." He didn't care about explaining more, just explained a few words, and quickly hung up the phone.

Hearing the busy tone of "beep beep" on the phone, Liang's eyebrows almost immediately frowned.

Entrance.

Hikari clasped Yucheng's elbow tightly, facing each other.

At this moment, the drunk man leaning against the wall seemed to have disappeared, and Jie Cheng glanced coolly at his right hand, and pulled his arm out of Guang's palm: "If you bring me home, you won't be afraid of me." Go out and talk nonsense?"

"You won't." Guang paused, "Mr. Xiu Er."

Jie Cheng was startled, and then smiled wryly: "So you all know."

"I just found out. Listen to what you said." Guang Chao smiled, but the body in front of him did not move.

In the end, it still stayed.Maybe it was because he couldn't hold back the light, or maybe he had hope in his heart.

"Some time ago, I happened to see your story in a magazine. Although the writing was ambiguous, I still wanted to come and see it with my own eyes." Jie Cheng sat on the sofa and said in a low voice.

"So, you went to the Go club?" Guang handed Xie Cheng a glass of water, and he pulled a chair and sat down.

Jiecheng nodded and lowered his eyes: "I think, if it is, I can definitely see it."

"Then did you see anything?" Guang smiled.

Jie Cheng raised his head slowly, looking at the light as if puzzled.

Guang's overly calm reaction was far beyond Xie Cheng's expectations.He lowered his head and took a sip of water as if escaping, but when the clear water entered his throat, he was startled suddenly—it was not cold drinking water, but warm boiled water specially mixed with hot water[1].

Looking at Jie Cheng, as if seeing his doubts, Guang explained with a smile: "You just woke up from alcohol, it's better to drink some hot water."

The warm hot water slowly flowed down the throat into the esophagus, warming the body a little bit from the inside to the outside.

He is like a desert brigade who has been short of water for a long time. After tasting the hot water for the first time, he tremblingly holds the cup and takes a few mouthfuls.

After almost drinking the hot water in the cup, he said, "I heard that you and Taya-kun share an apartment."

Guang smiled and looked around the living room, shrugged slightly: "It's a pity that Taya is not here today."

Jie Cheng lowered his head, swirled the cup quietly, and finally raised his eyes again after a few seconds of silence: "Do you want to hear my story? Although it's not very interesting."

Jie Cheng hooked the corners of his lips wearily, and the past that had been dusty for many years was caught off guard by the light: "I used to have a boyfriend I liked very much, and it was in the back street where you met me just now." I met in a bar..."

The resulting story, like many stories, has a warm and beautiful beginning.Two wandering souls met in a same-sex | bar, and after making love to each other, they soon lived together.The boyfriend formed is an elite white-collar worker working in a large company.Although her boyfriend doesn't know anything about Go, it doesn't prevent them from getting along.Even on weekdays, teaching her boyfriend to play chess has become one of their pleasures.

But a shady love affair is like walking in a white night.Dreams will eventually wake up.

The boyfriend's mother found out where the two lived. One afternoon, while the boyfriend was at work, she came to the door and threatened to break up as soon as possible, otherwise she would fax the intimate photos of him and her boyfriend to Nihon Kiin.

"Maybe it's the wrong time for me to meet him, and I'm too cowardly to blame," Jie Cheng smiled bitterly, "Facing her mother's repeated difficulties, we still gave in. I, still gave in."

"Thinking about it now, at that time, why did you let go so easily? Why didn't you stop stalking for a while?" The corners of the formed lips were still smiling, but the eyes were silent, like two nothingness Black hole, "Later, he moved back to his home. Later, he changed his mobile phone number, and I lost his news. It is said that people who are destined will meet again, but since then, we really... Never seen him again. He knew the address of our apartment, but he never came to see me once."

"You may want to say, what if his freedom is restricted, what if he has no way to contact me? I have thought about all these, and even wanted to go downstairs to his company to intercept him. But it was because of the so-called ' "Bottom line" and "self-esteem", so many opportunities for reconciliation have been missed by me time and time again... It's ridiculous, isn't it? It turns out that the bond between people is so fragile, and if you don't pay attention, you can never find it again... ..."

Jie Cheng smiled towards Guang, but his eyes seemed to be filled with bitterness and tears.

"Then, not long after, I received a red envelope in the mailbox of the apartment. There was no address on the envelope, no signature, and it was just stuffed in. It was a wedding invitation for him and a girl. Female Children, of course girls. It's only normal when you're with girls, isn't it?"

The eyebrows that formed Jie were about to knit together, but they were still smiling hard: "The day they got married, I actually went there secretly. The wedding venue was chosen in a very magnificent church. I stood far away in the corner I saw the girl when they entered. She was beautiful, and she was a perfect match for him. I stood outside the church door after the wedding. The sound of the organ came from the church, so For a moment, I almost thought that the person standing next to him in the church was me."

The fingers holding the teacup were tightly intertwined, and the blue blood vessels on the back of his hands were like cracked scars, undulating ferociously under his fragile skin.

"After he got married, I thought I would forget him. I tried to find other people, and I went to the bar today with this idea, but as you can see, they all failed. Not only failed, but also got Severe punishment. Later, my affairs will be exposed."

"I used to think that it was the worst thing for him to leave me. Later, when I saw him get married, I thought it would be like this. But after that, I was discovered by Qiyuan that I was gay. People around me The cold-eyed spectators, the sudden reduction in workload, and the repeated setbacks in the chess game completely broke my mind. I finally knew that the word "more" might be added to all the suffering. At that time, I had no strength to pursue it. Who is it, and how did it get exposed..."

Guang moved his lips and opened his mouth with difficulty: "Where's your family?"

"Family?" Jie Jie seemed to hear this strange word for the first time. After thinking for a long time, he smiled and said, "It's been a long time since I came out of the closet. How can a family allow monsters?" exists, doesn't it?"

He cut out all the scars in his heart and held them in front of Guang, but he seemed so calm as if he was telling someone else's story.

Calmly swallow the heartache back into the stomach.

Calmly bury regret in memory.

Then calmly put all the heartless smiles on his face.

"My story ends here. How is it? Did you enjoy listening? Are you happy? Now, can I go?"

Jie Cheng asked the above question with a smile, but for some reason, Guang's whole body shivered.

"No, that's not the case, Mr. Jie Cheng, I..."

"You investigate me and bring me back, don't you just want to hear what I have to say?!" Jie Cheng stood up abruptly.

Guang hurriedly stood up, "Mr. Jiecheng..."

Jie Cheng's chest heaved violently, and his gaze was almost sharply fixed on the light.But the young man reflected in his pupils seemed so sincere, and there was even a hint of sadness on his face that he tried his best to hide.

You already have someone you can rely on, why are you uncomfortable?

...for me?

Jie Cheng stared at the light silently, the sharpness in his eyes softened unconsciously: "Shinto-kun, can I call you that?"

Light nodded vigorously.

"Believe it or not, the reason why I went to the club was really just to see, if it was what I imagined, how would the two chess stars who are both lovers and opponents get along. Although I envy You guys are going crazy with envy."

Jie Cheng smiled faintly, but in Guang's eyes, it was uglier than crying.

"I don't know what you guys plan. I just want to say that the chess academy is not as simple as what you see. Where there are people, there will be a dark side. Besides, the tree attracts the wind. To win glory for Japanese Go is just a part of the people. Naive idea. There are always some people who can’t see you well. Some things, once opened, there is no room for maneuver. Of course, how to do it depends entirely on you.”

"I just hope that no matter what happens in the future, you will not let go of each other's hands. Because once you back down once, you will back down the second time, and the third time, and you will no longer have the courage to fight for it."

Jie Cheng took a few steps closer and gently put the water glass back on the dining table.

"Mr. Jiecheng, why do you..."

"Why did I say this to you?" Jie Cheng glanced at him, turned around, and turned his back to the light, "After all, there are already enough victims in this environment and system, and if you can lose a couple, it's considered an achievement." It's a good thing."

On that day, he went to the clubhouse, and the first time he saw the light interacting, he confirmed his thoughts.

Some things cannot be concealed.No matter how cautious you are, every gesture, a look, a small reaction will still completely reveal your secret.

When he was brought back by Shinto, he was indeed a little delirious.

But when Shinto's phone vibrated, he was already awake.Seeing Guang hurriedly hid in the room to answer the phone, he instantly understood who made the call.

In fact, he didn't know why he had to see it with his own eyes.Maybe I just want to leave another thought for myself-the extravagant hope that can no longer be realized in myself, at least there are still infinite possibilities in Shindo Hikaru and Taya Ryo.

And now that he has been here, seen it, and confirmed it, he has nothing to regret.

"Thank you for taking me in, I won't bother you anymore." Jie Cheng said, and walked towards the entrance.

"Mr. Jiecheng, it's so late, where are you going?" Guang hurriedly grabbed him.Jie Cheng was staggered by him and nearly fell to the ground.

Guang turned pale with fright, and became more and more unwilling to let the man leave: "Mr. Jiecheng, you can stay here for one night today and leave tomorrow, can't you?"

Xie Cheng broke Kai Guang's hand again: "Is there any difference between leaving today and leaving tomorrow?"

Light was speechless for a moment.

"This is not my place after all." Jie Cheng said, "I have come here alone for so many years. If I want to survive, I can always find a place to stay."

Seeing that Jie Cheng had decided to leave, Guang finally stopped insisting, and only tried to grasp the last clue: "In this case, Mr. Jie Cheng, can you leave me your contact information?"

Jie Cheng turned around in surprise, his empty eyes finally became focused.

He looked at Guang and smiled softly, just like in the photos back then, gentle and lonely.

"No need," he said.

Guang did not give up and asked again: "Then Mr. Jiecheng, will you go to the Go club in the future?"

Jie Cheng was stunned for a moment, then turned around and said, "We...will never see each other again."

Guang was startled, and when he came to his senses, he tried to hold Jie Cheng again, but the man sideways dodged as if he had eyes behind him.

"Wait for me." Guang quickly took a pen from the coffee table, and when he ran back to the entrance, Jie Cheng had already left.

Guang stood there for half a second, and the next moment, he rushed out of the door and said, "Mr. Jie Cheng!"

He stopped in front of Jie Chengxiuer regardless, grabbed his hand, and quickly wrote a string of numbers in his palm without any explanation: "This is my mobile phone number. Although my ability is limited, if you need help Please feel free to contact me anytime!"

"Also, Taya and I... No matter what happens, we both will work hard! I promise you!"

Jie Cheng opened his eyes wide in astonishment.

He looked down at the phone number in his palm, then at the young man standing in the darkness with bright eyes, and suddenly, as if relieved, he raised a gentle smile.

Not as fake as before, but a sincere smile from the heart.And there seemed to be a trace of vitality in those eyes that were originally empty.

"You really are an incredible person."

Leaving behind these sigh-like words, Yu Chengxiuer melted into the night under the watchful eyes of the light.

Note [1]: In most cases, throughout the year, regardless of whether it is warm in winter or cool in summer, Japanese people are accustomed to drinking cold water, including pregnant women who have just given birth, and rarely drink warm water, let alone hot water.

The author has something to say:

A few days ago, I was a little decadent, and my mood fell to the bottom.

And the stories written by Guangguang, watching them overcome various difficulties little by little, and move forward bravely, it seems that they can also become stronger.

I hope that the light in a certain Xiong's pen can become a real light, not just brighten one person's.

Thank you to everyone who is here.

In addition, there will be a lot of things tomorrow, and the update may be delayed for a few days.

You don't have to wait for more.But definitely won't give up.

If possible, I hope you can leave a lot of comments.