silent sample

Tang Sirong used to always lie to him, saying that his parents didn't dislike him. Tang Yuan believed it when he was young, thinking that compared to other parents, Huang Jun and Tang Yiyu were just not good at expressing themselves. It was hard to hide, and later even Tang Sirong acquiesced.

When it comes to related topics, she no longer argues for them, and what she talks about most is that after Tang Yuan's college entrance examination is over, they will move to another place to live together, and untie all the knots that have been stitched so hard that they will not The person who should be together returns to where he wants to be.

Tang Yuan's college entrance examination became a watershed. Everyone was waiting for this day, or indulged, or looked forward to it. When Tang Yuan realized that this day existed, he thought about whether to pass the exam. Can't get what I want.

But he wanted to be with Tang Sirong too much, he couldn't let her down too.

Tang Yuan once worked hard to restore this deformed family to normal. In fact, he has been working hard for more than ten years. When Huang Jun and Tang Yiyu broke up and didn't speak for two years, he thought that at least they were still living together. As long as they are not completely separated, there may be a turning point someday.

It wasn't until the day he was admitted to the experimental middle school that he found out that Tang Yiyu had other women outside, and one day in the third year of high school, he witnessed Huang Jun's so-called colleague with his own eyes, that he really realized that there was no hope for these two people.

All he did was in vain.

The only person he can really catch is that one person.

But now, even that person is leaving him.

"I want it." Tang Sirong said: "I was too lonely. I spent my childhood in the hospital. I envied others to have brothers and sisters by their side. So when I knew they had another child, I begged them to stay."

Tang Yuan opened his eyes. This was a story he had never heard before. Tang Sirong had never told him that it was her that caused his birth.

"When I told them like this, they really thought I wanted younger siblings. I was ill at the time and refused to take injections and medicine. I was crying and making noise in the hospital. They had to force them to agree." Tang Sirong said. Paused, "But do you know what the real reason is?"

Tang Yuan had a hunch that was not the answer he wanted to hear, and no matter what the final reason was, he had already been born and couldn't change anything, he pretended to be relaxed and smiled, "I don't care so much about the past, you do not need……"

Tang Sirong coughed, and Tang Yuan sat up.

"The real reason is that I eavesdropped on them once, and knew that they were thinking about divorce at that time. They had quarreled too many times because of my illness in the past few years, and they were disappointed in each other, and their relationship was also recovering day by day. A day of mutual complaints was wasted."

"But I don't want to."

Tang Sirong tightened his breathing, "...no child at that age would want their parents to separate, so I beg them to give birth to you, as long as you are healthy, they have no reason to argue anymore...and for your arrival , they will not mention it again in a short time..."

Tang Yuan lifted the curtain and helped Tang Sirong half sit up, "Don't talk about it, it has nothing to do with you, and it's not important anymore."

Seeing her painful expression, Tang Yuan stretched out his hand to press Ling, but was stopped by Tang Sirong. She looked at Tang Yuan, "You always said that I am free and easy, and I can see these things openly, but the truth is... there is no one better than me. A more extreme and irresponsible person..."

"But I'm not your responsibility."

Tang Yuan was eager to deny, "People are what they want to give birth to. Do you think you can decide how much you can decide whether they will go to bed?"

He thought of how many times, when facing Tang Sirong, he complained about his parents' indifference to him, accusing them of giving birth to him since they didn't like him, and that he didn't think about asking for his opinion when he was born, and asked him if he I am really willing to come to this world and be reborn in this family.

What was Tang Sirong thinking at that time.

Blaming myself like crazy, like this.

"So you see, I'm not as good as you think... I treat you well because you are the one I came to this world to suffer with me..." Tang Sirong's breathing became more and more rapid, and the next second Almost out of breath.

Tang Yuan pressed the call bell as quickly as possible, "Don't say it...don't say it, please...it's not your fault, these are not your responsibility, I never blamed you..."

Tang Yuan rushed out to call the doctor. Before being put on the oxygen mask, Tang Sirong took his hand and called him Xiao Yuan, "...Your birth is not up to you, so you should love yourself more...Did you hear that?"

Tang Yuan was kicked out of the ward.

The doctor came out half an hour later and told him everything was fine.

He sat outside for another half an hour before going in again.

Both Huang Jun and Tang Yiyu rushed over. This situation happened three times after Tang Sirong was hospitalized, so they didn't notice anything unusual.

Tang Yiyu looked at Tang Sirong, who was tortured to be skinny and bony on the hospital bed, shook her hand, and then went to the bathroom with red eyes, while Huang Jun sat by the hospital bed without saying a word, brushing Tang Sirong's messed up hair a little bit. take care of it.

At this moment Tang Yuan felt that no matter what happened to the family, they at least loved this daughter.

That's enough for him.

He had envied Tang Sirong, but never felt that she didn't deserve it for a moment.

Walking out of the hospital gate, feeling wet on his face, Tang Yuan raised his head and found that it was raining again. The past few days have been cloudy like this, and it will rain from time to time.

The hospital is never short of lively places. The noisy voices and the bustling traffic are all under the gray sky at this moment. Everything is slowly colored, like a slow motion that has been cut to the wrong channel, which makes people feel depressed. .

With his back to the hustle and bustle, Tang Yuan walked forward along the sidewalk, the double shadow gradually faded away, and when he reached the intersection, he turned right, walked again, and reached the next intersection.

He stopped, momentarily dazed, forgetting where he was going.

School?Today is Saturday, school is on holiday.

As Tang Sirong said, they really moved up the time of the whole vacation, and now they put it on Saturday night and come back on Sunday night.

Then go home?No one at home.

Now he would rather live on the street and sit on the side of the road all night than go back to that old house alone.

Unknowingly, the rain became heavier, Tang Yuan raised his hand and wiped his face, feeling as if he would never be able to escape the embarrassment.

He didn't blame Tang Sirong, really, even though the truth was a bit cruel, it was also more funny than he once thought.

He would rather Huang Jun and Tang Yiyu were patriarchal, because Tang Sirong was doomed to live soon, and wanted to make amends to him, but was disappointed, so he didn't love him that much.

Even when he was young, he thought that it is normal for parents to prefer the first child, and he is a boy, so he shouldn't be so sentimental to find a sense of existence.

In those years, he tried his best to explain himself, but he never thought that it was because the relationship between Huang Jun and Tang Yiyu broke down long before he gave birth to him. It was Tang Sirong who tried his best to mend it and made a wrong decision for this family.

... Or it can't be called a mistake, Tang Yuan is not a harmful existence after all, it's just a futile decision that doesn't help.

Those who should separate still have to separate.

Those who should go still have to go.

It's only time.

Tang Yuan walked in the rain for a long time, and the thin sweater was drenched and pressed heavily on his chest, making him almost out of breath.

When passing by a newsstand, the boss sold umbrellas to him, but he walked over without seeing him. At that time, there was only one thought in his mind, where was he going?

Or just here, on the stool, on the floor, anywhere you can sit, it's not so difficult to pass the night, when Tang Sirong wakes up tomorrow, he will sit back in front of her bed.

He has never been her responsibility, let alone her regret. If she feels guilty about it, it is Tang Yuan who needs to reflect. Not having a good time.

As for extravagance, he is long past the age of desire and need.

...And the other thing he thought, when he walked downstairs to Song Yichuan's house and remembered that he had only been to this place twice, but clearly remembered all the routes, the reason why the extravagant wish became extravagant is not unreasonable.

They hadn't spoken for more than half a month. On the day when Lao Xu announced his scores and rankings, Song Yichuan did not look at him as usual. The person who deliberately failed the exam for him no longer cared about whether he would stay or not.

Tang Yuan stood downstairs, looking at the light coming from the windows of every house. He remembered that Song Yichuan's house was on the ninth floor, a number he liked very much.

He stretched out his fingers and counted layer by layer. The rain made him unable to open his eyes. After counting, he was worried that he made a mistake, so he counted again seriously.

…Seven, eight, nine.

the light is on.

Tang Yuan called him.

It took a long time for Song Yichuan to pick up, and during such a long waiting time, Tang Yuan had already forgotten how to speak.

Until Song Yichuan lost his patience, "Speak."

"Are you home?" Tang Yuan asked.

Song Yichuan didn't answer, waiting for his next words.

Tang Yuan said again: "Can I go up for a meeting?"

"Where are you?" Song Yichuan walked to the window, lifted a corner of the curtain, looked down, but didn't see Tang Yuan.

Thinking that he was joking, he turned around casually, and saw his figure beside a car, dressed in black, almost blending into the night.

"I have nowhere to go, I want to stay with you for one night." Without waiting for a reply, Tang Yuan simply went all out again. Just a second ago, he might still be regretting that he should not have made the relationship with Song Yichuan so stiff. For a moment, I thought to fuck it again, they were destined to get better.

Long-term pain is worse than short-term pain. With this kind of mind, how long can he stay by his side? After graduation, Song Yichuan and Xie Yao will stay and fly together, and the result will be no different from what it was three months ago now.

"Why don't you go home?"

"I don't want to go back."

"Have you brought your ID card?"

If the previous question was forced, Tang Yuan should have understood if he didn't understand it at this point. Song Yichuan rejected him.

"Am I that annoying?" Tang Yuan smiled, and felt quite boring after laughing. It doesn't make sense to him whether he hates it or not, and he wouldn't do anything with Song Yichuan if he didn't hate him, and it was even more impossible to hate Song Yichuan.

Tang Yuan didn't see Song Yichuan standing behind the curtain, so he naturally thought that he didn't know that he was downstairs in his house. He didn't know where to go for a while, so he simply sat down on the steps of the green belt in the community.

Go find Yang Qifan, the problem is that he lives with his parents, if you want to see him like this, you must alarm his family.

It’s also okay to find friends from the former No. [-] Middle School, but I haven’t contacted them for a long time. If I suddenly appear like this, I will inevitably be asked questions.

Thinking about Tang Yuan, a shadow fell over his head, completely covering the little light left. The rain above his head suddenly stopped, and Song Yichuan appeared in front of him holding an umbrella.

Tang Yuan stood up, being about 1.8 meters tall, the space under the umbrella suddenly became a little cramped, he stepped back a little, Song Yichuan moved his wrist lightly, and the umbrella tilted towards him.

Before Tang Yuan opened his mouth, Song Yichuan put on a straight face and took a step ahead of him, "I'm asking you what's wrong now, if you still only say that you're in a bad mood, then get out of here as soon as possible."

Tang Yuan was taken aback for a moment, then smiled, "You still understand me, so don't blame me for thinking so much."

He was smiling the first time he saw Song Yichuan, and his brows and eyes faded into a smile in the night, wrapped in a layer of mist like a cocoon, which couldn't be melted away.

Song Yichuan used to think he knew him, but now he couldn't understand him more and more. Does Tang Yuan really like him?I don't like why you have to ask him that kind of request, that kind... In his opinion, it shouldn't be something that people of their age should ask, nor should it be made to him.

And at this moment when he looked at him, apart from being paranoid, Song Yichuan couldn't see any admiration in his eyes, Tang Yuan didn't like him, he just went crazy, because of some reasons he didn't know, he desperately wanted a vent mouth.

To this end, he tried many methods, each time becoming more extreme, until this time he found him.

But why should he go crazy with him?

"Go up." Tang Yuan took two steps back and waved at Song Yichuan.

Song Yichuan wanted to give him the umbrella, but Tang Yuan obviously didn't need it, "Let's go."

He stepped back into the night step by step until the light in the hall could no longer shine, leaving only a vague outline.

Then, the outline disappeared, completely disappearing in the rainy night.