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A month later.

On Sunday, August 8, it rained heavily in Shanghai.

Zuo Zhengyi didn't bring an umbrella when he went out today, and the dense raindrops fell from the sky like beads. He retracted the legs he had just stepped out of the supermarket gate, and was forced to stand under the eaves, waiting for the rain to stop.

He was not the only customer under the eaves. There was an old man who brought his grandson to buy snacks. The boy must be a junior high school student. He was holding a mobile phone and watching the live broadcast while his grandfather was nagging.

It was a live broadcast of the game, with hero voices and kill announcements ringing frequently, mixed with a few male anchors boasting: "Brothers, how did I play? Is there no controversy in the second game of the national server? If I don't play professionally, what about End?" Have a chance to be number one?"

The junior high school student rolled his eyes: "Bah."

Zuo Zhengyi turned to look at him.

I saw a junior high school student typing with one finger on the screen of the mobile phone, tapping for a long time, and sending a barrage: "Crayon, you can't even touch the top [-] of the national server, how dare you touch the porcelain world champion?"

Zuo Zhengyi looked away.

The rain didn't stop, he tightened his mask, grabbed the plastic bag containing the ingredients, and walked into the rain curtain.

The rain was strong and the wind was strong, and it was a bit cold.

The tall buildings lined up on both sides of the road showed a lifeless leaden gray, the sky was dark, and the birds flew low.

Zuo Zhengyi walked alone on the sidewalk, brushed the rainwater from his hair on his face, and turned on his phone to look at the map.

The neighborhood he lives in is not far from this supermarket, but the nearby routes are very winding. He has only moved here for two days, and he is not familiar with it.Choosing to buy groceries in person instead of delivering groceries is only because he is bored and wants to go out for a stroll.

The house is rented, more than 90 square meters, not small for one person to live in.

In addition to the necessary spaces such as the bedroom, kitchen and bathroom, he also specially packed a special room, decorated it slightly, and used it for live broadcast.

That being said, more than a month has passed since returning to China from Seoul, and Zuo Zhengyi has never broadcast a live broadcast.

Not only that, he doesn't even show his face.

On August 8, EPL held the annual awards ceremony and awarded him the FMVP of the season.

The league officials called in advance and invited him to attend to receive the award.But Zuo Zhengyi didn't answer the phone, and he wasn't at the Scorpion base, so he didn't know where he was hiding.

The alliance couldn't contact him, so he didn't feel embarrassed, and asked the host to read the thousand-word award speech written in advance to praise the End players on stage.

At that time, the details of Zuo Zhengyi's hand injury had been announced, and everyone knew his helplessness and suffering while playing with the injury—the point is, he was able to climb to the top of the world under such circumstances and win the laurel crown with his own hands. Destiny Child.

The host read it with tears in his eyes, his face flushed, and he was also on the hot searches.

That night, Zuo Zhengyi's Weibo comments increased by tens of thousands, and fans came to him crying and begging him for a letter: Has the hand injury healed?Will he be able to play in the new season?

After Zuo Zhengyi finished reading, he uninstalled the Weibo app.

Zuo Zhengyi seemed to be old, and began to close his eyes and listen, hating the noise of this world.

Those cries seemed to be crying for his grave, but he wasn't dead yet.Although the state of being alive now is almost the same as being dead-he disappeared.

He doesn't answer everyone's calls, doesn't reply to WeChat, doesn't post on Weibo, doesn't start live broadcasts, and doesn't play games online.

Zuo Zhengyi flew out of public view like a stray bird.

A month ago, he played a set of perfect maneuvers on the night of the decisive battle in Seoul, like a shocking sword on the top of Huashan Mountain, he won the world championship trophy for the Chinese division, and the whole country reveled.

But this invisible sword also cut on his own wrist. After the check-up, Zuo Zhengyi was notified: "Either take a risky operation, or your career will end like this. Think about it."

Zuo Zhengyi asked: "How much can you recover after surgery? Will you be able to return to your peak condition?"

"It's not certain," said the doctor.

The doctor is only responsible for curing his disease, and cannot guarantee that his playing state is exactly the same as before.

The "status" of professional players is already somewhat metaphysical. There are not a few healthy players whose status has declined, let alone those who have used knives?Even if the tendon sheath is cut and the inflammation is removed, it is unknown whether the response of which nerve will slow down.

If it slows down, even if it slows down by an inch, it will be a thousand miles away.

Zuo Zhengyi was silent for a moment, and replied: "Let's talk about it when we return to China."

He has to think about it.

But he didn't think about the result after returning home.There seemed to be two choices before him, but in fact there was only one.

Can he not have surgery?Unless you retire at 20.

But he doesn't want to have surgery, and he doesn't want to retire.

Zuo Zhengyi's strength seemed to be overdrawn in July in Seoul. After returning to Shanghai, he stared at his hands every day, and his whole body was so fragile that it would break if he touched it.

——The championship belongs to him, but the happiness belongs to others.

He became reluctant to communicate with others, unable to listen to any ordinary words of comfort or congratulations, and unwilling to be looked at with admiration or pity.He was like a candle that had burned to the end, leaving only ashes on the ground.

Zuo Zhengyi asked Scorpion for a long vacation.

He has half a year left on his contract, his hand injury is unpredictable, and it will be difficult to play in the new season. The management of the Scorpions did not make things difficult for him and approved it.

There was no mention of a contract extension by either party.

Zuo Zhengyi could have stayed in Scorpion to take care of him slowly. During the contract period, the club will reimburse all the expenses and take care of him.

But Zuo Zhengyi really didn't want to stay in a crowded environment anymore. He didn't even want to see Ji Jue, so he asked for leave to avoid Ji Jue, and moved out quietly on a day when Ji Jue had something to do. .

By now, communicating with anyone would make him feel irritable.

He suspected that there was something wrong with his mental state, but his trauma hadn't healed yet, let alone seeing a psychiatrist.

But this is actually just speculation, he is calm most of the time.

He has realized that the final outcome of great joy and great sorrow is to return to peace, and peace is the true meaning of life.

Zuo Zhengyi opened the door and put the freshly bought vegetables into the refrigerator.

Two eggplants, one broccoli, three potatoes, and a handful of cilantro.Probably no one would have imagined that the missing world champion was currently staying in an unknown residential area in the depths of Shanghai, thinking about what to cook for tonight.

Zuo Zhengyi hasn't played games for a long time, he only cares about enjoying life.

—Barely enjoy it.

He suddenly realized recently that in the first 20 years of his life, he had never lived alone. This was the first time.

A few months ago, when Zuo Yi came to tell him that he was dying of stomach cancer, Zuo Zhengyi was hurt for a while, feeling sorry for himself, "walking alone, alone".At that time, he didn't expect that when he was really walking alone, he would not feel that kind of emotion.

Zuo Zhengyi was so calm that he was almost withdrawn, thinking to himself, whether it is a genius or a mediocre person throughout the ages, no matter whether they succeed or fail, they all end up in the same end - becoming an insignificant dust in the long history.

In the end, ashes return to ashes, dust returns to dust, everyone gets mixed together, and when a heavy rain pours down, it's all mud.

He uses such a detached thought to dispel depression, it is hard to say whether he is really detached, or he is pretending to be profound.

In short, he felt at ease.

But every time Zuo Zhengyi saw the keyboard on the computer desk, his eyes still felt sore.

So before he went out today, he pulled out the keyboard and put it in the cabinet.

Surgery is a must.

Even if it turns into mud, Zuo Zhengyi is still a puddle of mud that will roll forward.But he was too tired, if he didn't rest for a while, he couldn't survive.

As for what will happen after the operation, whether his skills will deteriorate, Zuo Zhengyi doesn't make any assumptions on his own, there are already enough people worrying about him on the Internet.

On the second day after the whole process of his hand injury from initial onset to deterioration was announced, netizens on Weibo, forums and live broadcast platforms united to conduct a "three-party consultation" for him.

Then, before he could say anything, they started crying.

All kinds of sensational remarks emerged one after another, and some people cut a championship commemorative video of "End Personal Orientation", which used his name "Zhuge was born" in the first year of his debut, and quoted an ancient poem written by Zhuge Kongming:

"The heaven and the earth are all in one force, and the hero is not free when transported away."

In the video, Zuo Zhengyi lowered his head and wiped his face when he stepped off the stage after the final, his team uniform was soaked and his wrists were red and swollen.

Weeping all over the Internet.

It was as if singing a eulogy for him at the grave, making Zuo Zhengyi suspect that he was really dead.

It's not that he is mean to other people's kindness, he can only think so, he doesn't want to be like them, immersed in that kind of uncontrollable grief.

The End players haven't retired yet.

There shouldn't be only one championship trophy for the world's number one mid laner.

Zuo Zhengyi thought so, but he still didn't want to have an operation right away. He decided to cook eggplant tonight.

But Zuo Zhengyi is not good at cooking, he has to search for recipes on the Internet even if he scrambles an egg, and roasting eggplant is a difficult dish for him.

He changed out of his rain-soaked clothes and sat on the sofa early to study the recipe. While searching randomly in the recipe software, WeChat rang again.

From the first day he "disappeared", there were a lot of people looking for him.

The first one is naturally Ji Jue.

He didn't want to reply at all, so he sent a circle of friends, saying: "Take a break, don't worry, and don't bother me, thank you."

Since then, most of the friends have stopped, but Ji Jue still calls many times a day, endlessly.

Zuo Zhengyi was very annoying.

It has been more than half a month since he moved out of the Scorpion base. He lived in a hotel at the beginning, and it took two days to settle down after he settled down.

He knew that Ji Jue must really want to see him, and maybe he was very sad, but what obligation did he have to appease Ji Jue?We broke up a long time ago.He couldn't take care of himself, and now he just wanted to be alone, to heal his wounds, to be a puddle of mud that no one could disturb.

Zuo Zhengyi blocked Ji Jue's eight numbers, and he didn't reply to Ji Jue's greetings from his friends.

At this point, Zuo Zhengyi no longer cares about family or not.

He had a vague premonition that if his technique changed after the operation, he might really not be able to survive.

At this time, a WeChat message pop-up window suddenly popped up, blocking the recipe for roasting eggplant.

Jue: "End, are you there?"