dumb boy

Shen Xia was awakened by this slight movement, and opened her eyes in a daze.

He vaguely saw the man's handsome pale face in his hazy vision, and he was neither surprised nor frightened.

Too many times, dreaming of him like this.

It's like this every time, without speaking, just sitting beside him quietly, looking at him with sad eyes.

Shen Xia didn't dare to move, he was afraid that if he moved, the dream would wake up again.

Holding the blanket nervously, he only dared to ask softly: "Qin Yanqian, today is New Year's Eve, can you stay with me for a while this time?"

He hoped that the man would stay in his dream longer, and it was best to get through tonight.

Qin Yanqian just looked at him silently.

Tears rolled down Shen Xia's cheeks, and she begged in silence: "Stay a little longer, I miss you so much...Qin Yanqian, I miss you so much, I'm too lonely by myself..."

He cried more and more fiercely, crying heartbreakingly, coughing violently, but still did not receive any response.

It's fake, it's fake.

Qin Yanqian would not let him cry like this.

An indescribable hatred suddenly sprouted in Shen Xia's chest, and she angrily reached out to hit the person in front of her.His hand suddenly flew into the air and hit the corner of the sofa, and the person in front of him disappeared like a phantom.

There was a faint pain in his wrist, Shen Xia opened his eyes from the dream, and looked blankly at the dark living room in front of him.

The boy's slender eyelashes trembled wetly, and the tears on his cheeks had turned cold.

Shen Xia sat on the sofa blankly, after a long time of stunned, she reached out and took an orange from the fruit plate on the coffee table.

He bought the fruits in the store when he came here. He didn't know how to pick them, so he asked the boss to pack some for him.

The villa has been unoccupied for a long time, and the heating is not turned on. After waking up, I feel even colder.Shen Xia was shivering from the cold, wrapped her body in a blanket, shiveringly peeled open the orange, and put a piece into her mouth, the sour and cold juice immediately filled her mouth, irritating her teeth so much that their roots were bitter.

Even the owner of the fruit shop lied to him.

They all lied to him.

She said that she would always be with him and take care of him, but in the end she still left him here alone.

With tears in her eyes, Shen Xia ate the sour orange piece by piece, then wrapped herself in a blanket and went to open the door.

It was dark and cold in the villa, and there was a strong smell of dust. He wanted to breathe fresh air outside.

But he didn't expect to see a black car parked not far away.

When he came, he obviously didn't have that car yet.

In order to ensure privacy, each villa is far apart in the community they live in, and there is a private parking garage, so there is basically no impression of random parking.

Shen Xia looked there a few more times curiously, and when she saw that there was still a person standing beside the car, she froze there.

He suspected that he hadn't woken up from the dream, otherwise how could he feel that he saw Qin Yanqian.

The man was leaning against the car vaguely, the black clothes on his body made him almost merge with the car body, but the cigarette held between his fingers was still shining with orange-red light spots, and the white mist exhaled from his mouth was a man as strange as a ghost Adds a touch of realism.

Shen Xia's eyes widened in disbelief, she walked out the door, and tentatively called out: "Qin Yanqian."

The man was smoking a cigarette with his head down, and when he heard his voice, he turned to look at him.

The man didn't change much from the last time we met, even though he was wrapped in a bloated and thick long black down jacket, he was still as thin and thin as a piece of paper.

His face was too pale and clear. If he hadn't seen Qin Yanqian's shadow reflected by the hazy moonlight behind him, Shen Xia would have wondered if he had really been taken away by someone. It was the soul of a man who met him now.

Shen Xia's mind went blank, and she ran towards the man: "Why are you here?"

Qin Yanqian extinguished the cigarette when he saw him coming, and said calmly, "I'm back home."

Shen Xia really wanted to say that this is not what he asked.

What he wanted to ask was how did you know I was here, and did you come to find me.

But Shen Xia looked at the man's indifferent face, swallowed the words that had stopped on the tip of her tongue, and let out an embarrassing oh.

The man didn't take the initiative to speak, and the two of them faced each other in silence for a long time, Shen Xia had no choice but to speak again: "Have you recovered from your illness?"

"Ah."

The man's answer is still evasive: "I can walk now."

Shen Xia's eyes, which had been bright for a moment, dimmed again, and said in a nasal voice: "Today is New Year's Eve, why aren't you at home to spend the New Year with your parents?"

"..."

This time the man didn't seem to find a suitable reply for a while.

But what they need most now is time.

Shen Xia waited patiently.

After another long silence, Qin Yanqian said softly, "I want to see you."

During the period when he first left the country, his illness suddenly worsened and became more serious. He had to take a lot of medicine every day, and sometimes he would suddenly become very excited. He wanted to ask Shen Xia to get back together and tie him by his side forever, but he was Abroad, it is impossible to meet boys.He was extremely manic, throwing things like crazy, cursing everyone loudly, then weeping, reverting to a gloomy and indifferent state again.

When he was rediagnosed, he wasn't suffering from pure depression, but bipolar disorder, which could even hurt other people during an episode.

He missed the child very much, and wished he could go back to China immediately, but he didn't dare to come back. He was afraid that when he saw the child again, he would suddenly lose control and hurt him.

Every day abroad is like living in purgatory.

After more than a month of treatment and recuperation, his condition has gradually improved, and most of the time he can remain in a normal state.

After the treatment abroad a few days ago, he returned despite his parents' obstruction.

What he was thinking was that both Qiao Yang and Xu Wenning had returned home during the Chinese New Year, if Shen Xia who lived in this city had any problems, who would he turn to to solve them.

But after he returned to China, he followed Shen Xia for a few days, only to find that the child had changed a lot.

In the past, I always had a bit of a tired and lazy temperament, but now I don’t stay up late and sleep late, and I don’t order takeaway all day long. I obediently follow the recipes given by the nutritionist to eat on time every day, work and rest regularly, and even know it in the evening Wander around.

Qin Yanqian stood not far away, watching the child wrapped up like a round ball, waving his arms and legs, clumsily exercising like his aunts and uncles in the square, he felt an indescribable feeling in his heart.

The kid has grown up and doesn't need him anymore.

But he depends on the child like poison.

Qin Yanqian lowered his eyes, not daring to look directly into the eyes of the boy in front of him, as if talking to himself, he quickly said in a low voice: "I miss you so much."

Shen Xia's red eyes were sore from the cold wind, and suddenly he wanted to cry again. He wrapped the blanket tightly around his body, sucked his nose to suppress the crying, and said, "Go back."

Shen Xia turned around and walked towards her home. After walking a few steps, seeing that the man didn't follow, she turned her head and said to him, "Let's go."

Qin Yanqian was stunned for a moment before silently following.

He thought the child was asking him to go abroad.

His foot injury was not fully healed, he walked with a limp, and slowly followed the child, stepping on his shadow.

The old man said that stepping on a person's shadow is equivalent to catching the person.

Qin Yanqian used to think that this kind of talk was really old-fashioned, but now he is doing such childish behavior.

After entering the villa, the living room was dark, like a gloomy old haunted house, cold and chilly.

After Shen Xia entered, she kept rubbing her hands. Qin Yanqian went to turn on the electric switch of the villa, then turned on the lights and heating, and lit the old-fashioned fireplace for heating.

The dark room suddenly brightened.

Shen Xia thought the house was unoccupied, and these things would be unusable long ago, so she gathered around to warm her hands in surprise.

Qin Yanqian moved the single sofa to him: "Don't squat down."

"Thank you." Shen Xia's stomach was already growing, and squatting was really uncomfortable. He sat on the sofa and covered his slightly distended belly under the loose cotton clothes with a blanket.

He always relied on him involuntarily around men, obviously he could move, but he was too lazy to get up, and asked Qin Yanqian: "Can the TV be turned on, I want to watch TV."

Qin Yanqian stood up again and turned on the TV.

The TV has not been used for a long time, and the network line has been broken, but after tuning for a while, I still found a station that is broadcasting the Spring Festival Gala.

Qin Yanqian also brought him the fruit plate and asked him, "Did you buy this?"

Shen Xia nodded, took a big and round orange and handed it to him, opened her round eyes and said, "You eat."

Qin Yanqian took it and peeled it off and ate it.

"How is it, sweet?"

"……sweet."

Shen Xia looked suspiciously at the man's expressionless face, took the orange from his hand, and ate a piece herself.

Still sour with a toothache.

Shen Xia spat out the orange petals, and stuffed the remaining half of the orange into Qin Yanqian's hand.

Qin Yanqian continued to finish eating, and then brought a single chair to sit with him to warm up by the fire.

There was a funny cross talk on the TV, and the warm orange fire reflected on the faces of the two of them, making the deserted and quiet living room finally feel a little warm.

Shen Xia looked at the man's sickly thin profile, and asked, "Are you still going back abroad?"

Qin Yanqian said, "I won't go back."

His illness can also be treated in China, but his parents are worried about him and want him to stay abroad because they are afraid that something will happen to him.

But now seeing Shen Xia's protruding belly, he suddenly made up his mind, no matter what, he must stay here to guard the child.

He now regrets that he insisted on keeping this child.No matter how well the arrangements are made, childbirth is always risky. He is too afraid that something will happen to Shen Xia. Compared with the child, he wants Shen Xia to be safe and not suffer any pain.

But Shen Xia's thoughts were completely opposite to his.

As the baby in the belly is getting bigger and bigger, the boy only thought it was novelty and fun from the beginning, and didn't care much about it. The responsibility of raising a child to grow up.

When she felt the fetal movement for the first time, Shen Xia was so excited that she cried.

This is his baby, the life he conceived, it's amazing.

When Shen Xia heard Qin Yanqian's answer, she was inexplicably happy.

When he saw the man talking, he had been staring at his stomach, and his stomach trembled suddenly as if sensing the man's gaze.

Shen Xia revealed surprise: "The baby is kicking me!"

He grabbed the man's hand, wanting him to feel the baby's reaction: "Touch it."

But as soon as the man touched his body, he quickly retracted his hand as if he had been electrocuted.

Shen Xia was stunned for a moment, looking at the man who suddenly frowned a little helplessly.

Qin Yanqian was also taken aback, before explaining in a low voice: "My hands are cold, don't freeze."

Shen Xia let out a muffled oh.