I am in the crematorium, Wen Dang A Piao

In the middle of the night, Xin Jianran drank his third can of beer and lay down on the picnic cloth. Here he could see the unobstructed starry sky. On the dark blue night, the sky was full of stars. He looked quietly and said today The first sentence of the night, "The stars are so bright."

Shi Huaixi and Xin Zhuo also lay down with him, Shi Huaixi answered: "Tomorrow will also be a sunny day."

Xin Jianran laughed, and after a long while, he said, "I'm stupid, right? I've been counted on for six years so defenselessly, if I hadn't met you, the body wouldn't even know where it is now, how could anyone be so stupid?" Woolen cloth?"

Even he himself looks down on himself, "Obviously knowing that Cheng Ting has a problem, but he is still unwilling to face the reality, deceiving himself and others, self-righteous, thinking that Cheng Ting will fall in love with me, every time I get close to him, he will Don’t you think, the body he chose is really easy to control, he can let me go to it without even showing any emotion... I really deserve it when I think about it, don’t I?”

"I don't have any qualifications to judge you," Shi Huaixi didn't look at him, still staring at the bright star, "I don't have a pair of eyes that can see ghosts, I don't have the physique to be coveted by ghosts, I haven't been rejected and grown up in isolation Big, I have not been sent back to the orphanage by adoptive families time and time again, I have not experienced what you have experienced, so I am not qualified to say that you are stupid, that you deserve it, and no one else is qualified to comment on you."

"If I have to say something, then I just want to tell you," Shi Huaixi's voice softened, "Xin Jianran, you've worked hard all these years."

Xin Jianran had a sore nose, his vision gradually became blurred, and he was quiet for a while before he could speak again, "Xin Zhuo, I'm sorry for you too, because I let you be ignored by your parents before, but you were found later I was also fooled by Cheng Ting to follow him back, so that my parents can't rest assured, and I never thought about repairing our relationship, and I never fulfilled my responsibility as an older brother."

Xin Zhuo stopped holding the puppet's hand, he was not good at dealing with such occasions, and said stiffly: "I told you before, all the reasons are the traffickers who abducted you, and my parents ignored me as theirs." The problem is that they didn't spare any energy to take care of me, and after you were found, I didn't even think about repairing our relationship." His tone became more serious, "Xin Jianran, don't always look for reasons on yourself."

Xin Jianran's eyes began to get wet again, and he listened to Xin Zhuo continue to say: "If I have to say it, I can only say that you are unlucky and always encounter garbage. Let the trash go back to where it belongs."

The wet and hot touch slid down the corners of his eyes, Xin Jianran raised his arms to cover his eyes, his voice was choked with uncontrollable sobs, "Xin Zhuo, you...can you leave for a while...I am your brother, I...I don't want to be with you In front of... embarrassment."

Xin Zhuo snorted lightly, "Have you made too many embarrassments in front of me?" He said unforgivingly, but he still sat up, "I'll go find Master, you can continue talking."

He rubbed the little puppet and said to him, "I'm leaving."

Shi Huaixi patted him, "Go."

As soon as Xin Zhuo walked away, Xin Jianran's sobs could no longer be suppressed. Shi Huaixi accompanied him quietly, and it took him a while to hear him ask, "Do you have such an idea? Just thinking that you have never done it before. Bad things, but this kind of life is spread out, obviously I did nothing wrong..."

"I will have this idea for a long time." Shi Huaixi replied him.

When he was young, he was taken by the dean to play in the amusement park. Looking at the happy smiling faces of every child, he would think that he is not a disobedient child. He can take a bath and dress himself, eat well, wash his own dishes, and eat well. There are not many, and I don't want good toys. Why don't I have parents who love him?After thinking about it, he worried that he was too greedy, so he changed his mind, and it was okay to not love his parents that much.

But after so many years, he still hasn't found his parents, and he hasn't found his own home.

It's hard to describe the feeling of not having a home, as if there is only a way forward in life, only a way forward, and no way back.

From a very young age, he knew that he only had himself, and no one would tolerate his fragility and willfulness unconditionally, and he didn't have a place to escape or rest.

There was no one behind him.

During many gloomy and helpless moments, he would think, he hadn’t done anything bad, and he was considered a good person, why would he have such a life?

"This kind of emotion cannot be resolved, and there is nothing wrong with it," Shi Huaixi continued, "I began to accept it and let it become one of my common emotions, but it is a day to be happy, and it is also a day to be unhappy. Live happily, and let yourself vent when you are sad, scolding fate and the garbage you encounter.”

"Xin Jianran, do you want to scold someone? We are far away from here, you can shout as loud as you want."

Xin Jianran put down his arms, he recalled everything related to Cheng Ting, his original sad mood was filled with anger, he said: "Cheng Ting is a piece of trash."

Shi Huaixi agreed, "Big trash."

Xin Jianran's voice became louder and louder——

"Big trash Cheng listen."

"Dog things Cheng listen."

"Cheng Ting, you bastard!"

"I will make you pay for it!"

"In the past few years, I have been feeding dogs!"

"Garbage is evil! It's not good enough for me!"

……

Xin Jianran stopped when he roared until his voice became hoarse. Shi Huaixi asked, "Are you feeling better?"

"It's much more comfortable." Xin Jianran rarely felt refreshed. It turned out that it felt so good to vent out his suppressed emotions.

Shi Huaixi patted him, "That's good. When we solve Cheng Ting, you will be completely comfortable. Just take it as a hurdle and just step over it."

Xin Jianran felt more at ease when he heard his determined tone.

Because Shi Huaixi didn't deliberately conceal him, now that he thinks back, he is sure that Shi Huaixi knew about his fate from the very beginning and dragged him out.

It's really like he's here to save them.

"At that time, the bondage between us will be gone, will you stay?"

Shi Huaixi pondered, "I don't know, maybe I will stay, maybe I will go around, punish evil and promote good, maybe I will reincarnate?"

Xin Jianran didn't expect that he would still want to reincarnate, so he said directly in a hurry, "Don't you care about Xin Zhuo..."

Shi Huaixi met his nervous expression and smiled calmly, "See?"

Xin Jianran looked at him sideways, "It's strange if you can't see it, you are sticky every day, and you like him too, why..."

"I like that he doesn't conflict with my leaving."

Xin Jianran's voice became quieter, as if he was guarding a secret, "Aren't you willing to be with him?"

"Humans and ghosts have different paths, how can we be together?"

Being together is not enough to like each other. He is a ghost who does not know when he will be able to cultivate his body. He has no body temperature, no heartbeat, and cannot be touched.

He didn't have warm palms to interlock with Xin Zhuo's fingers, he couldn't give him a firm hug, and he couldn't kiss him intimately, sniffing each other.

He is invisible to most people.

Xin Zhuo couldn't even see him directly.

This is, people and ghosts have different paths.

Xin Jianran's chest felt tight when he heard him speak in such a calm tone, "But you obviously like each other very much."

Shi Huaixi smiled, "It's not impossible to be together."

"Ok?"

Shi Huaixi hissed, "I can't tell you this."

Shi Huaixi is waiting for Xin Zhuo's decision.

From the moment he realized that he fell in love with Xin Zhuo, he knew that he would be the one waiting.He didn't intend to pull Xin Zhuo into a ghost affair, because it would be too unfair to Xin Zhuo, but he was willing to wait for it.

As long as Xin Zhuo thinks clearly and decides to go to him, then he is also willing to give his sincerity and be responsible for his temptation seriously.

Even if he doesn't know what the ending will be like.

But what about him.

Xin Jianran didn't ask any more questions. They chatted for a while, and each other's mood calmed down. Xin Jianran stood up and said, "Let's go back."

Shi Huaixi looked at the jade gourd protruding from his neck, "Will this bother you?"

Even if Shi Xi was completely innocent in this process, it was still a little subtle.

Xin Jianran shook his head and stuffed it into his collar, "I feel happy instead."

Happy six years shrouded in haze, not only being deceived and used, but also protected.

When he himself was unable to protect himself, he protected a dying soul.

Shi Huaixi patted him on the shoulder when he heard the words, "That's good, it's over."

His fate has deviated from the established ending, and he is walking on a path illuminated by the sun.

Everything will get better and better.

When Shi Huaixi came back, Xin Zhuo was sitting on the rocking chair on the balcony reading a book, without raising his head, he said, "Are you willing to come back?"

Shi Huaixi floated over with a smile, "Have you been waiting for me?"

"I just can't sleep."

Shi Huaixi stroked his hair very understandingly, "If I can't sleep, I take a shower and lie down on the bed first. It's late, let's go to bed early."

Xin Zhuo snorted softly, put down the book and went to take a shower.

Shi Huaixi sat on the rocking chair and felt that he really had a cat named Zhuo Zhuo.

Tsundere and clingy.

How did it fall on this guy?

Shi Huaixi was swinging quite leisurely in the rocking chair, probably the feeling is so unpredictable, outrageous and unreasonable.

When Xin Zhuo came into the bedroom after taking a shower, Shi Huaixi had already changed into her pajamas and was lying on the bed playing with her mobile phone.

He was wearing the yellow cat pajamas that are very popular recently, and his round feet were shaking proudly. Seeing him coming, he tapped his phone, "Xin Zhuo Xin Zhuo, come quickly, I just broke your record!"

Xin Zhuo sat on the bed and looked at his screen. It was a skiing game played by a puppet most proudly.

Looking at him like this, he probably doesn't remember what he said when he was half-conscious, and he put his hips on his hips and yelled, "You will definitely not be able to break my record this time!"

Xin Zhuo then took the mobile phone, Shi Huaixi sat on the quilt in front of him and watched him operate intently, Xin Zhuo played three times, and by the third time Xin Zhuo had slipped to a place very close to his record, he watched Looking at the puppet in front of him, he was so nervous that his round hands clenched, and he laughed secretly in his heart, manipulating the puppet to trip over a rock and fall.

Shi Huaixi heaved a sigh of relief and hummed triumphantly, "Let me just say—"

Xin Zhuo tugged his hat, opened another game, "Play this."

Let him find his place in this game.

They played a noisy game for a while, reached a draw, and finally died down and went to bed.

Shi Huaixi leaned against Xin Zhuo's shoulder and collapsed into a cake, poked Xin Zhuo's earlobe and said to him, "Good night, Xin Zhuo."

Xin Zhuo squeezed his tricky hand, "Good night."

Shi Huaixi closed his eyes and quietly counted his breaths.

very nice.

He has quiet nights and people he likes.

The author says:

It will get better and better——

drink together jpg;

akimbo jpg;

proud hum jpg