he is a transparent person

Jiang Yao returned home in a daze, and when faced with his mother's question "Why did you come back so soon", he just prevaricated a few words before sneaking into the room.

Knowing Xie Zhijin for so many years, he has never seen him in such a decadent state, like a piece of crystal clear glass, seemingly indestructible, but actually vulnerable to a single blow, as if he could shatter Xie Zhijin into tens of millions piece.

Xie Zhijin even refused to let him approach.

Should I not allow it, or dare not?

Jiang Yao sat in a daze, his head was a mess.

He Ming's video call lifted him up a little bit, he patted his face and answered the call.

The hair tips of the young man on the screen were wet, there was still a little mist in his eyes, and the corners of his lips were smiling. The scene of a very beautiful woman coming out of the bath was really pleasing to the eye, and Jiang Yao couldn't help laughing.

As soon as he moved, he felt the tingling sensation on his lips, subconsciously reached out to touch it, and then looked at himself in the upper right corner of the phone - there was a small hole in his lower lip, which seemed to be caused by a bump.

Just as He Ming wanted to make a sound, his eyes touched Jiang Yao's lower lip, he paused for a smile, slowly grasped it with five fingers, and gently called Jiang Yao.

Scratching Jiang Yao's heart like a cat's paw, Jiang Yao was suddenly flustered, but suddenly, he couldn't turn his head around, and only uttered a single sound, "I..."

He Ming's smile sank completely, his eyes were gray, and he asked, "Are you going to see Xie Zhijin again?"

Jiang Yao's throat was dry, and he hummed for a long time. He was about to explain, but he heard He Ming say in a tone that was so true, "Actually, I guessed this would happen a long time ago, Jiang Yao, I don't blame you."

"Understanding" is mixed with helpless sadness.

A sour feeling rushed straight to the tip of Jiang Yao's nose, his eyes turned red with anxiety, "That's not the case..."

"So what?" He Ming looked at him through the screen, as if he wanted to penetrate his flesh and reach his heart, "Can you guarantee that you don't have Xie Zhijin in your heart?"

Jiang Yao opened his mouth, speechless.

"Look, you can't even lie to me or make me happy." He Ming smiled wryly, "If he's sick, you just go to see him eagerly. If he kisses you, won't you hide?"

Jiang Yao felt like he had a stick in his throat, and was ashamed by He Ming's few words.

He Ming took all of Jiang Yao's reactions into his eyes, he was too aware of Jiang Yao's temperament - cowardly, indecisive, sentimental, as long as he offered a little bit of sweetness, he would learn not to refuse, the same reason If you show him your vulnerability, you can easily win his sympathy and pity.

Both cute and pitiful.

He Ming is sometimes annoyed by Jiang Yao's easy-to-manage character, but he is also thankful that Jiang Yao has such a sentimental character, otherwise he would not be able to take advantage of Jiang Yao's love for others when he knew it.

Even though he was unwilling and regretted that he could not get 100% love from Jiang Yao, he still refused to let go.

Taking retreat as an advance has always been He Ming's forte.

He looked at Jiang Yao's expression of crying or not, his eyes were half down, and his voice was slow and low, "Jiang Yao, I just think that you don't love me enough."

Jiang Yao was stung by a short sentence and burst into tears.

He is like a child who is being led by He Ming and stumbles forward, he can rely on He Ming's love for him wholeheartedly, so he doesn't have to worry that the other party will make him fall, but at this second, he has He Ming's will The panic of letting go.

Jiang Yao's vision became blurred, he was afraid that He Ming would leave him, so he cried out He Ming's name.

"I used to think that as long as you loved me, it was enough," He Ming said with half of his face shrouded in darkness, "but it turns out that people really become greedy. The more you love me, the more I want to get more. I'm ten, and I can't help but want it all."

"Jiang Yao, I'm sorry, I may be a little sad, I won't chat today, go to bed early."

He Ming stared at the tearful face opposite him, ruthless, and hung up the phone regardless of Jiang Yao's pleading.

The phone rang and rang, but He Ming didn't answer it again. He leaned against the head of the bed, looking at the bright incandescent lamp on the ceiling, his eyes were filled with white light.

He was the last person who didn't want Jiang Yao to be sad, but he had to try his best to make Jiang Yao care about him more.

Even if it's just a little bit more.

After the phone rang for more than ten minutes, it finally quieted down. He sent a message to Jiang Yao, "I'm fine."

Jiang Yao quickly replied, "He Ming, can you answer the phone?"

He could imagine Jiang Yao's expression, there must be tears in his eyes, but he just played the word "good night" and ignored him.

He Ming thought about leaving his phone in the room, and went out to get some water.

He came home this morning, and as the Chinese New Year was approaching, Mother He was still weaving handmade bags on the small table in the living room.

He Ming looked at his mother's hunched back, walked over, and said in a low voice, "Mom, let's rest for a while."

The woman raised her face, but people in their 40s were a bit older than their peers. This woman had suffered for most of her life. Now that the burden on her shoulders has been relieved, she still dare not take a moment to relax. Ticked off, and smiled back, "The delivery will be delivered after the next year, you don't have to worry about me, go to rest early."

The mother and son lived in a rented house of forty square meters. He Ming proposed to change the house two months ago, but He's mother refused, so he had to give up.

He pulled out his chair and sat down, fiddled with the various balls of thread on the small table, and advised, "I can earn a lot of money by accepting jobs now, so don't bring these goods back in the future."

Mother He said yes, and then said, "You are still studying, when you come out to work, I will wait to enjoy the happiness."

Unable to persuade his mother, He Ming pursed his lips silently.

"Although you earn money, you still have to spend outside. You don't have to worry about me. I don't ask you to be rich and wealthy. Just be happy for the rest of your life."

He Ming nodded, "I know."

Mother and son have been living together for so many years, they are both thinking of each other, so there is no need to say much.

The night is getting darker, and it is destined to be difficult to sleep tonight.

—

Through the door, I could hear the subtle voices of my parents talking, "It's not easy to make appointments with experts during the Chinese New Year. I asked a friend to ask, and I brought them there on the fifth day of the Lunar New Year..."

The footsteps faded away, and the living room lights went out.

Xie Zhijin leaned on the bed and took the medicine, but the angina pectoris became stronger and stronger, as if someone was chiseling with an ax day and night, and would not stop until the flesh was bloody.

He drove Jiang Yao away, but he couldn't drive away the longing for Jiang Yao deep in his heart.

The extreme tugging split him in two and there was no peace.

At twelve o'clock in the morning, Xie Zhijin found the belt hidden in the closet, pinned one end to the bedside, and the other end—he slightly rolled up his sleeves, exposing his bruised wrist, stared at it for a long time, but did not fasten it .

Ever since he found out that he was sleepwalking, Xie Zhijin would tie his hands to the head of the bed.

His mother once asked him where he wanted to go when he opened the door, but he didn't answer, but the answer already appeared in his heart.

When he is awake, he can forcibly restrain himself, but once he falls into a deep sleep, those thoughts suppressed by him drive him forward like Gu worms in his body.

Like a wandering soul at the bottom of a kettle, it instinctively looks for the source of living water.

Standing outside the doorway of the corridor that day, listening to Jiang Yao telling how he misses He Ming, every sentence is like thunder.

It turned out that Jiang Yao who was with He Ming had so many smiles and happiness.

It turns out that missing does not need to be hidden in the heart.

It turned out that this was liking—he wanted Jiang Yao to smile happily like that forever.

Xie Zhijin never knew that he was a timid person, afraid that Jiang Yao in front of him would show Xun Xun's temptation and the look of crying.

A few moments later, the belt was tightly wrapped around the wrist, deeply sinking into the bruised flesh.

He would struggle unconsciously in the middle of the night, and the belt would cut his wrists over and over again.

He is not afraid of pain, he is beginning to be afraid of Jiang Yao being sad.

—

Jiang Yao was woken up by his mother with two dark circles under his eyes.

He didn't sleep all night, and finally he squinted for a while when it was daylight, and then he had to get up again.

The vacuum cleaner buzzed in his room, and Mother Jiang said, "What time is it, we agreed to go to the market with your dad, why don't you get up soon?"

Jiang Yao covered his ears and got out of the bed, drooping his head to wash.

It was very cold today, Jiang Yao went out with his father wrapped up tightly, bumped into Xie's father and son at the stairs, and only then did he know that the two families were going to the market together.

Jiang Yao quietly glanced at Xie Zhijin, who was wearing a black coat, which made his face so pale that there was no color.

The eyes of the two met inadvertently, and Jiang Yao's fingers hidden in his pocket tightened slightly.

Everything about last night is vivid in my mind, but now in front of the elders, I have to act as if nothing happened. The four of them got into the car together. The younger generation sat in the back seat, and Xie Zhijin looked out the window without squinting.

He was so close to Xie Zhijin, yet so far away.

Jiang's father and Xie's father were talking about work, but they didn't hear the voice behind them, and wondered, "Why are you two so quiet today?"

Jiang Yao looked up and saw himself in the car mirror, and muttered, "I got up too early, I'm a little sleepy."

Father Xie said with a smile, "I will go to the seafood market with Zhijin to catch two lobsters later, and I will immediately feel refreshed."

Jiang Yao said yes, and moved his eyes to look at the person beside him, only seeing a small piece of white chin on the other side, and quickly retracted.

The nearby market has everything that one expects to find, and it is very lively with people coming and going.

After getting out of the car, Jiang Yao followed his father around and worked around, but was stuffed into a basket by Xie's father, "Go shopping with Zhijin, buy whatever you want, and uncle will give you the money."

Then he patted Xie Zhijin on the shoulder, "Don't be bored at home all the time, talk to Jiang Yao more."

Xie Zhijin was noncommittal, but he didn't follow in his father's footsteps, and there were only two of them left.

Holding the basket, Jiang Yao hesitated for a while, and decided to stick to Jiang's father, but just as he took a step, Xie Zhijin said, "Let's go."

"I am still......"

What He Ming said last night made Jiang Yao brood, and he could no longer be alone with Xie Zhijin with peace of mind.

But Xie Zhijin looked at him quietly and said, "Someone is selling candied haws outside."

Jiang's mother would not let Jiang Yao eat from the roadside stalls, thinking it was unhygienic, and would only let Jiang Yao eat a few skewers during the holidays.

Xie Zhijin doesn't like sour food, but if he encounters a small stall on the road, he will give Jiang Yao a bunch of them and let Jiang Yao hide in his room to eat secretly.

But that happened two years ago. Now that Jiang Yao has grown up, no one cares about him in the university, and he can eat the junk food that Jiang's mother said openly.

After Xie Zhijin said this, before Jiang Yao could answer, he took the lead.

Jiang Yao had no choice but to follow. Before he ate the candied haws, his heart was already filled with the sweet and sour taste.

Three ways

Xiaohe: The tea art attack that retreats into advance, my wife loves me so much!

Xiao Xie: It's almost done, I went shopping with my wife.