Who doesn't deserve it

Resting today, Ning Yu contacted Yi Chen.

Yi Chen who was contacted was unexpected. This seemed to be the first time since the reunion that Ning Yu took the initiative to find him. Of course Yi Chen agreed, but he didn't know what to do, so he agreed that Ning Yu would come.

On the phone is Yi Chen's reply text message.

Ning Yu stayed in the room alone, no one could talk, he leaned against the corner of the table silently, looking out the noisy window, the weather was fine.

The first time he and Yi Chen met was midsummer, it was very hot that day, he stood at the door of the class, bumped himself into his arms, and then started this relationship.

It's good to be young, hot and beautiful, whoever you choose, who you look for, you can't defeat anything, Ning Yu thought, she didn't have that kind of impulse for a long time, it was only in the ignorant and fearless youth.

Two sparrows flew from the guardrail outside the window, poised their heads and looked around cautiously. Ning Yu watched them quietly. The sparrow that didn't stay for too long was scared away by a knock on the door, and slipped away from under Ning Yu's eyes with flapping wings. Walk.

He suddenly remembered that it seemed that he seldom saw sparrows, and he saw more when he was a child.

Ning Yu withdrew her mind, went to the living room and opened the door, outside stood Yi Chen who had contacted her.

Yi Chen smiled at him, and Ning Yu responded gently, and he let him in.

"Haven't you had breakfast yet?" Yi Chen raised his hand, bought buns and a cup of porridge, and put them on the table, "I brought them for you."

"Thank you," Ning Yu smelled the fragrance and pushed the door shut, "What's the matter?"

Yi Chen said, "It's from mushrooms."

Ning Yu's hand froze, he turned his head and glanced at Yi Chen, seeing that the other party was fine, he helped him clean up the dining table.

"I don't know if you like this taste or not." Yi Chen said, "I still bought it according to the previous taste."

In the past, when he bought him breakfast, he remembered his taste. Times have changed and people have changed so much that even his taste has begun to change. Yi Chen is not sure that he is still the same.

Ning Yu didn't answer him clearly, but just said: "Thank you, it's true that I haven't eaten for a long time."

"Don't thank me."

Ning Yu smiled at him, he walked back to the room, and tidied up briefly, leaving Yi Chen alone in the living room, Yi Chen's voice came from the living room: "By the way, I haven't asked you what's the matter. ,You do not need to work today?"

"No, rest day." Ning Yu responded and said, "Yi Chen, can you come in for a while?"

When Yi Chen heard it, he walked to the door of Ning Yu's room. He didn't know what Ning Yu called him for, but when he came to the door, he was stunned. Ning Yu in front of the mirror was wearing a fisherman's hat and Dressed in plain clothes, she turned her head, touched the brim of her hat, saw Yi Chen stunned, and asked, "What's wrong?"

Yi Chen inevitably has to think about the past. Although wearing a hat is a common thing, it is an ambiguous signal between the two of them. Zeng Ning Yu, because he likes it, has been wearing a hat during that time, so that Yi Chen can see it at a glance in the crowd. find him.

"Why are you wearing a hat all of a sudden?" Yi Chen walked in in a daze. He couldn't believe that Ning Yu was doing it for himself, but he felt lucky that it might be.

Ning Yu didn't answer, but asked: "Isn't it pretty?"

Yi Chen said frankly: "It looks good."

Ning Yu said, "That's fine."

Not only a hat, but also a video camera on the table, Yi Chen’s heart was turbulent, but Ning Yu had already walked to the camera, picked it up, checked the equipment, and said to Yi Chen: “Look at this. "

Yi Chen walked up to Ning Yu, took the heavy camera from him, and looked at Ning Yu blankly.

"I asked someone to buy this, and I don't know much about it. You can see if it can be used directly."

Yi Chen turned the camera in his hand, it was very new, and the dust-proof film on the lens was still there, "What did you buy the camera for?"

"Take a picture," Ning Yu said, "you are a big photographer in front of me, can I apply for two free photos?"

Yi Chen still doesn't quite understand, of course it doesn't matter to take pictures, his current job is also related to photography, he is already a professional photographer, he has taken pictures for many people in the studio, but he wants to take pictures most these years People who have never had a chance to meet.

Now that the opportunity is in front of him, even though Yi Chen has many doubts in his heart, he will not refuse this request. He raised his head and looked at Ning Yu affectionately, "Where do you want to shoot?"

An hour later, the two came to the playground.

They took pictures in many places. Ning Yu used to have so many photos that he could not finish posting them on a wall, and he could not fit in a photo album. He obviously didn't like taking pictures, but he left so many works for him, and those works, all He died in one night, and now he wants to make up a few more.

Ning Yu and Yi Chen are choosing a place, Yi Chen has a lot of suggestions, but this time he respects Ning Yu's opinion in all aspects, and just be a tool for him to use. Ning Yu is not entangled, and said with a firm goal: " Carousel."

Yi Chen frowned: "On the merry-go-round?"

Ning Yu said, "Well, that one is my favorite."

I like the photo on the merry-go-round the most, because Yi Chen said that he smiled the most naturally in that photo.

Now, he came to find that feeling.

It's not the place of the past, but the people are the people of the past. Ning Yu didn't care about other people's eyes. In this playground with many people on the rest day, she sat on the childish and beautiful merry-go-round in her memory.

Yi Chen looked at him, and didn't pick up the camera for a long time. The merry-go-round went around, and he didn't move.

"I've already turned around twice." Ning Yu reminded.

Yi Chen suddenly realized that the person sitting on it now was no longer the person who loved him wholeheartedly back then. He didn't dare to waste time, so he found an angle, backed up, and backed up again.

Picking up the camera and making a professional pose, every shot that captures Ning Yu refreshes the frequency of the heartbeat. Now they are not the same as before. Compared with the frantic heartbeat, this heartbeat is much quieter and more responsible.

The photo freezes on the picture of Ning Yu smiling slightly, that smile is full of sadness after going through right and wrong after adulthood, it is not as pure and brilliant as it was back then.

"Not sweet enough." Yi Chen said, "Do you want to take another shot?"

Ning Yu looked at the photo, raised her head, and shook Yi Chen gently, "No need." The effect of the year can't be photographed, no matter how many times it is repeated.

He bought a camera, but only took a few pictures on the carousel, which was still not satisfactory, but Ning Yu didn't ask to continue.

But the camera was watched by others, because when Ning Yu was being photographed, many people were watching. The parents thought about it and said that they wanted Yi Chen to take a few photos of their children, and they could pay for it. Everything is negotiable.

Yi Chen cast his gaze at Ning Yu. It was still early and many places were not yet open, so Ning Yu nodded to him.

They photographed children in the playground.

The mother asked to be with the child, and the child had to take a photo with the teddy bear. In various places and in different projects, I took a lot of photos. It’s not because of anything else, but the photographer is free. , many people will know.

Ning Yu followed Yi Chen, and there were all sorts of people who came here admiringly, students traveling alone, graduates working, pregnant women, parents with children, several elderly couples, and young couples.

"You are so professional, you are much better than his." The girl pointed to the boyfriend next to her, and she was quite satisfied with Yi Chen's work. The boyfriend had nothing to say, and the girl asked, "Can this be washed out? I want it, I can pay."

Yi Chen said, "Yes."

Yi Chen gave an address, free filming and free cleaning, many people are willing to get it no matter how far away it is, which is a good advertisement for the photo studio he works.

"So generous?" Ning Yu asked, "Have you made a lot of money in the past two years?"

"With a little savings, it's not a problem to develop some photos." Yi Chen said, "Thank you for advertising our studio."

Ning Yu waved his hand: "It has nothing to do with me, it's all due to you."

Yi Chen raised the camera and said, "I'll return it to you after it's washed out."

"No need, it's for you." Ning Yu didn't want to keep it for himself. For a person who doesn't like to take pictures, there is no need for a camera.

Another couple came over, and Yi Chen was very busy. Ning Yu didn't expect such a situation. He acted as a little assistant and cooperated with Yi Chen to record every loving moment in this playground.

The sun at noon was a bit bright, Yi Chen and Ning Yu rested under the gazebo, Ning Yu bought two glasses of smoothies and handed them to Yi Chen.

"Tired?" Ning Yu asked with concern.

"Fortunately," Yi Chen said: "When we are busy, the workload is much more than this."

Ning Yu smiled, "I didn't expect this effect, but it's pretty good."

Yi Chen touched the ice-cold cup and looked at Ning Yu. The years have been quiet, and they have not been in close contact these past few days, so he was very puzzled when they spent together today, "Ning Ning...is today a special day?"

The spoon in Ning Yu's hand contained red beans and crushed ice, he looked up at Yi Chen and said, "No."

Yi Chen put his hands together, sat upright, stared at the person in front of him and asked, "Then...why did you suddenly ask me to take a picture?"

I also gave him a camera, and stayed alone with him on the only day of rest. If Ning Yu hadn't figured out how to deal with their relationship, she probably wouldn't get along with him like this. Yi Chen didn't dare to be arrogant, he just On the bright side, maybe... there might be a chance today.

Ning Yu's hat was put aside, and the two sat opposite each other. He lowered his head and took a spoon to look for red beans in the ice. "I just want to find the feeling I used to have."

Yi Chen didn't dare to disturb him.

Ning Yu raised her head and asked, "Have you thought about the possibility between us?"

"I've always wanted to." Yi Chen said.

Ning Yu nodded: "If I didn't forgive you, what would you do?"

They didn't want to bring up bad topics and past events, but there were some things that couldn't be avoided. Yi Chen rubbed his fingers together, lowered his head and said, "I will find a way to make up for you, until the day you forgive me..."

"No, that's the problem," Ning Yu said, "You don't need to ask my forgiveness, the person I should hate is not you."

Yi Chen didn't quite understand: "What do you mean?"

Ning Yu smiled slightly, continued to play with the smoothie, her eyelashes fluttered slightly, and said sincerely: "It's nothing, Yi Chen, I don't want you to have this mentality, please forgive me, make up for my mentality."

Yi Chen was silent, he couldn't decide these things, if he could think about it, he wouldn't stand still these years, he knew that he had dealt a major blow to the person in front of him, and he couldn't forgive himself.

"It's good for us now, isn't it? If you keep worrying about the past, you won't have a good life, and I won't be comfortable either," Ning Yu spread his hands: "What if we let go together?"

Yi Chen took a deep breath, his gaze was erratic, this is his entanglement and hesitation, "I'm sorry for you, I don't know how to let go of the past."

"You're not the one who's sorry for me," Ning Yu said brightly, "You're not sorry for me. You're also a victim in this incident. There's no need for victims to have such mentality. It's someone else's fault."

"That person can't be found back then," Yi Chen said, "I can't even find out who the murderer is, but I was indeed plotted to hurt you, I..."

Yi Chen was entangled, not only Ning Yu was hurt, but also Yi Chen couldn't let go of the past, they were all tortured people over the years.

Ning Yu put down the spoon in his hand, leaned back, looked at the guilty face of the person in front of him, and said after a long time: "What if... I forgive you?"

Yi Chen raised his head with a complicated expression.

He didn't dare to ask for forgiveness, even though he wanted to be forgiven, he could understand Ning Yu's hatred, he could understand the knife he gave him, and he didn't even think about how he would face it if Ning Yu forgave him.

Ning Yu said: "I admit that I am not a magnanimous person. I have thought about this matter for a long time, but compared to before, this time I really let go."

Ning Yu breathed out, looked at Yi Chen, and gave him real persuasion with bright eyes, "Hate is like love, as long as there is a little bit left, it will be difficult to live the rest of your life, and you will not be able to love others wholeheartedly."

Some of them have stagnated over the years, and some have found new lovers. The steps of progress have long been different. At the fork in life, the distance in the future has been decided.

"The past two years... I have lived a very messy life," Ning Yu recalled the past years, "I was promiscuous, hurt others, and played with emotions. I don't believe anyone's love and liking. This life will go on like this, you may not believe it, because what I express now is not like this, it is because I woke up in the second failure of relationship, your fault has nothing to do with me, and I will take revenge It's time to let go, the knife I gave you has already ended the love and hate between us, so I think... there is no need to hold on to it, you and I are the same. "

Letting go is not easy, but after careful consideration, it is not difficult to find the murderer and break through the old psychology. The moment the result was reported, Ning Yu knew that he had to let go completely. Yi Chen was right, he was another victim .

Yi Chen frowned, "Then we are sitting here now..."

"As I said just now, I said to find the feeling we used to have," Ning Yu said, "You actually felt it, but you can't find it anymore."

Yi Chen crossed his hands and took it off the table.

Ning Yu raised his arm and picked up the hat on one side, with a clear voice: "I just want to tell you that even if we are together, it is impossible to go back to the past, just like how many times you take pictures, I can't laugh The way you used to be, and no matter how close you are to me, I can't find the way I used to feel, because...we don't love each other anymore. "

"But I, I love you." Yi Chen's hands tightened, his voice was not firm enough, as if words could be broken by blowing.

"Really? Are you sure you love me?" Ning Yu asked: "Yi Chen, are you sure you love me now, or the me who loved you wholeheartedly?"

These two time periods are not the same person, they should all feel that not all love can stand the test, being in love is not that great, sometimes time can really wash away, dilute those loves that used to be yours.

"I want to tell you that the future we planned has changed the protagonist three years ago." Ning Yu paused and grabbed the hat in his hand. Those futures that had been promised were shattered, he remembered I still feel regretful, but there is nothing I can do. They can sit together today, but they can no longer talk about the future together. Ning Yu said ruthlessly: "I have never told you that I actually... don't like wearing hats, and neither do I." Sitting on a merry-go-round and laughing, I don't even like taking pictures."

Yi Chen stared at the hat stiffly, Ning Yu's brows and eyes were clear, without any concealment, his face was still the same, but the tender eyes looking at him were no longer the same as before.

"Your camera may have been on the wrong person all along."

He shouldn't focus on him, he shouldn't be in his camera, the match is not equal, and the persistence ruins the appearance of the two of them.

"This time, I just want to have a good talk with you," Ning Yu said, "Your appearance was not an accident, it was carefully arranged by someone, but that person overestimated me too much, I'm not a teenager, my love It has been transferred a long time ago, I did love you very much at the beginning, but now I have changed from the inside out, I am not the person you loved at the beginning, and it is impossible for me to still love you."

Yi Chen touched his forehead and pursed his lips, "What do you want to say to me?"

Ning Yu said: "It's very simple, we have to end it."

Yi Chen spread his hands, helpless and puzzled: "We didn't start?"

"No more contact," Ning Yu said, "You and I shouldn't have any more contact."

Yi Chen blinked and looked around. This was not what he expected. He thought today was their progress. Ning Yu made such a big circle, not announcing the progress of their relationship, but announcing the end?

Yi Chen raised his hand, wondering: "Why?"

Ning Yu sat opposite him, put his hat on the table, and gave a forceful answer: "Because I'm getting married."

Yi Chen froze in place.

Ning Yu looked at him and said, "You know him. If you didn't show up that night, the ring would already be in my hand."

Yi Chen's lips parted slightly, is this what he wants to announce today?This is the answer he gave him after thinking about it for so long?A redefinition of their relationship?

"I don't want to move him out, but I can't help it. He holds a lot of weight in my heart," Ning Yu said, "But he has nothing to do with my rejection of you. He is my new rest of my future life. The person who decides to spend the future together, I just want to tell you that it is time for you to get over what happened five years ago, even without him I would not be with you, a misunderstanding cannot eliminate the bad things between us remember."

Misunderstandings exist, but things happen, injuries are caused, indelible memories and pictures have been played repeatedly in the past five years, and a single misunderstanding cannot be cleared up, just like Ning Yu now, who can’t completely have the same mentality as before. Go back to the innocence of the past, love the person in front of you, have no grievances, wholeheartedly, the constant replacement of people in reality and life has shattered the once beautiful dream.

They live in a colorful world.

Their side is not only each other, not the only one.

"You forgive me, don't you?" Yi Chen wasn't looking at him.

"Yes, I can do it." Ning Yu said firmly.

Yi Chen didn't have any doubts anymore. He thought it was a chance with Ning Yu, but he had imagined this situation countless times. He just didn't expect it. When he saw the result he didn't want to see, he was still a little sad. .

"I don't know what to say," Yi Chen spread his hands and smiled unnaturally, "I should be happy if you forgive me, but... I don't feel relieved."

Ning Yu gave him time to digest, and he didn't ask him to accept everything now and follow his suggestion to implement something.

"Okay, then I shouldn't bother you," Yi Chen stared closely at the person in front of him, his face was calm, but his eyes were not so relaxed, "I hope you are happy, as long as you can be happy, who is beside you?" It doesn't matter."

Anyone can say beautiful words, just like Yi Chen had to go against his conscience to say such beautiful words. He hoped that he would be happy, but the person in front of him was the person he fell in love with when he was a teenager. wish him happiness.

"I thought about this possibility when I came here. After so many years, there must be someone new by your side. I'm not surprised at all." Yi Chen stood up, as if there was no need to stay any longer, he walked out, He walked fast, but Ning Yu's face kept echoing in his mind, he stopped, turned his head, and looked at his back.

Ning Yu sat alone in the gazebo, the opposite was empty, he didn't move, he had presented the results of these days, he had no dissatisfaction, and he shouldn't have any regrets, he tried hard to convince himself...

Until, Yi Chen embraced him in his arms.

He hugged his thin body into his arms from behind, Ning Yu's tight strings suddenly broke, and he closed his eyes, never contacting the original feeling like this.

The gazebo is not an embrace of two people, nor a warm scene, but a regret of youth.

"My purpose this time is to see you," the voice trembling above my head, "Sure enough, when I saw you, I became even more greedy and wanted you greedily, can you promise me that there will be no accidents in the next life, if you want be with me."

He didn't give up on those plans. If you can't do it in this life, you can continue in the next life. Anyway... people have regrets in this life.

That summer, the two teenagers fell in love with each other, their passionate emotions erupted, and they graffitied in their youth, leaving behind artistic paintings.

Ning Yu didn't answer him, Yi Chen laughed at himself, what is he expecting?What is he saying?What is he thinking about?

Slowly let go, the boldness of this life is only here, Yi Chen looks at him in the gazebo, he may never be able to forget.

Turning around and picking up his steps, Yi Chen had to leave.

The heartbeat of that summer can no longer continue.

How many people can a person fall in love with in this lifetime?How many people do people have the energy to love?When you are young, you really have to be restrained. It is best to be plain and ordinary. A vigorous person occupies your youth and makes everyone you meet in the future eclipsed.

He didn't have any thoughts anymore, he was embarrassed even to leave, Yi Chen was carrying heavy steps, and was about to leave, at the moment of despair, his hand was held.

Yi Chen stopped, breathing lightly.

They turned their backs to each other, holding each other gently, surrounded by sparkling water, and in the ten seconds of silence, a beautiful voice fell, startling the free fish.

"I promise you."

The author has something to say:

"In the next life, we will be together."

May everyone have no regrets in their youth.