Legend of the Condor Heroes

Ruined the hairstyle that was said to have been messed with for four hours since getting up early in the morning.

"Aw... my hairstyle!" Grabbing the girl by the collar, the boy turned into a roaring godfather, and performed the killing trick.Shaking the girl's shoulders vigorously, "This is the hairstyle I designed for three days and three nights! You ruined it, ruined it!! How can I go to see Lue, how to see my little wife, how to go See that big sister in fluttering white clothes???? Tell me, tell me!! Tell me, tell me!!!"

"Yeah! Yang Guo, you bastard, you dare to yell at me. If I don't beat your face today, you won't know why the flowers are so red!!!" After finishing speaking, the girl threw a left uppercut Straight to the boy already had bruised and purple eye sockets.

Me: 'Card!The camera stops here first.Now I, the senior host, will do a detailed historical analysis for the confused audience!It is said that it was a long time ago...'

Director: 'Hey, I said this is a live broadcast, you thought it was a video tape, can you just press the pause button?Also, how could it be so long ago!These two are obviously still young boys and girls, okay! ! '

Me: "Four-meter horse race (Japanese! What a god, don't you understand? Cut... so old-fashioned.) Cough cough, let's get to know the two contestants first!" !First of all, this girl in green is Ouyang Zhaoxi, the eldest daughter of Ouyang Ke, the owner of White Camel Mountain, and Huang Rong, the eldest lady of Peach Blossom Island.I believe that the audience has also known it in the first few episodes!As for Ouyang Zhaoxi, she is now twenty-eight years old, but she is really a juicy little girl...Meow Ho Ho Ho...Her wish has always been to marry her grandfather.The wish I made every year on my birthday since I was a child is to hope that my father will perish in this world from now on.What she loves most is grandpa and mother, and grandpa, who can barely add a big log, and what she hates most are daddy and Yang Guo.The reason for this competition is that Yang Guo, the boy she is beating now, stole her favorite snack.You know, it's small to eat snacks, but whoever steals them is the biggest problem! !The slogan of our Ouyang Zhaoxi is - until you are flattened, it is best to be killed! '

Yang Guo: "Hey, hey, I said director, there is no patriarchy here!"Why am I always being bullied and beaten.I was beaten by her mother when I was a child, and now I am beaten by her, do I have a grudge against women!You know, I made a lot of sacrifices for this trip!The maintenance fee of my watery skin alone costs a lot of money, and now you guys still want me to show my first blood on screen! !There is no reason for this, there is no patriarchy! !Be careful that I go to Patriarchy to prevent you from suing you for abusing male compatriots! ! '

Director: (looks furtively, then whispers to Yang Guo's ear) 'Ahem...add a picture of the little dragon girl getting out of the bath in wet clothes! '

Yang Guo (with bright eyes): Two! !

Director: Deal!

Me (smiling): Meow haha... Well, it was just a temporary extra.Never mind, never mind.Let me introduce to you the only male compatriots who participated in this competition.Yang Guo! ! !That's right, you don't have vertigo.He is the same Yang Guo we saw in Yang Guo's Lifetime.It's just... ahem, his family's situation is a bit special, we'll talk about it later.Camera, give our hero a shot. '

Yang Guo: 'Hi... Hello everyone.Dear sisters, sisters, aunts, grandmas, hello!I am Yang Guo, who is obsessed with death and is known as the little dragon with jade face! '

Camera: Convex! (#‵′) Convex.

Me: "Yang Guo, his birthday was just yesterday."Now in the midst of the biggest crisis of his teenage years.His favorite is... ahem! !Beauty in swimsuit.What I hate the most is Ouyang Zhaoxi.His slogan for the competition is to oppose violence and defend patriarchy. '

Suddenly, I felt a chill around me.Two bolts of lightning fell from the sky.Behind Ouyang Zhaoxi and Yang Guo, a bunch of red flames that could destroy the entire universe were ignited.The eyes of the two of them were fixed together, and from time to time, sparks and crackling explosions would erupt.

Twitching the corner of my mouth, I made the most correct decision in this century! !

Me: 'action.Game start! '

The voice just fell.Ouyang Zhaoxi kissed Yang Guo's right eye fiercely with his left fist like a tiger descending the mountain.His right hand tore at Yang Guo's thin lips.I vowed to make Yang Guo's lips into that sexy sausage mouth.

Here, Yang Guo grabbed Ouyang Zhaoxi's hair and shook it back and forth, stepped on Ouyang Zhaoxi's right foot with his left foot, raised his right leg to kick Ouyang Zhaoxi's stomach.

When it was too late, Ouyang Zhaoxi pouted his buttocks, allowing Yang Guo's shadowless legs to slip past his lower abdomen.

Ah, Yang Guo missed an opportunity.Unexpectedly missed.

Not to be outdone, Ouyang Zhaoxi immediately pinned Yang Guo's right leg with his foot, firmly clamped it with his legs, and bumped his forehead against Yang Guo's smooth forehead.

Only a bang was heard.There were bursts of blue smoke rising from Yang Guo's forehead, and his eyes also showed a confused swirl shape.

Ouyang Zhaoxi seized the opportunity and kicked Yang Guo's vital parts with a provocative kick.

"Aww!! Director! This is a life attack!!! I protest!!"

Director: Left uppercut, right uppercut! !Ahhhhh?Protest is invalid.continue.

Yang Guo hugged his lower abdomen and rolled desperately on the ground.Ouyang Zhaoxi showed a devilish bloodthirsty smile, cracked the knuckles of his fingers, and walked to him with a smirk, "Boy, don't you know that sister, I have already knocked down several people with this trick?"

Ouyang Zhaoxi, who thought he would see Yang Guo's ashamed, resentful, unwilling, and painful eyes, did not see the expected scene when he walked in.

I saw Yang Guo raised his head with difficulty, a malicious smile flashed across his lips suddenly.

"Not good, it's a scam!!"

But it's too late.At the scene, we saw Yang Guo standing upright like a carp, locking his throat with his hands, clasping Ouyang Zhaoxi's throat upside down, whispering in her ear with disheveled hair, "Hey, little sister, I peeked at big sister when she was taking a bath, You haven't been born yet. Let's practice for a few more years!"

After finishing speaking, Yang Guo used the ultimate nirvana! ! !

Me (panic!!): 'Ah, it's...'

"Ultimate nirvana - milk grabbing dragon claw hand!"

"Ah...Yang Guo!! I'm going to cripple your salty pig's hand!!!!"

Ouyang Zhaoxi lowered his head to look at the two black paw prints on his chest, his slowly raised face was covered with clouds, and it was difficult to distinguish the facial features and expressions.And the red will-o'-the-wisp behind him also burned more intensely!

I saw Ouyang Zhaoxi pulling out a handful from the back bit by bit-the dragon-slaying knife! !

Me: 'Director, isn't this a bit too ridiculous.Now there is a dragon knife? '

Director: 'Stupid, art comes from life, but it is higher than life! !Go, go, don't block me from enjoying the cruel images of □. '

I:'……'

"Hey hey...I, I want to, scratch you!!"

"Hmph, I thought you had a weapon!! Come out, my lady sword!"

Me: "Hey, hey, you guys should be more dedicated, why is it Dragon Slayer versus Lady Sword?"Shouldn't it be Dragon Slaying Sword versus Yitian Sword, Lady Sword versus Gentleman Sword? '

Yang Guo, Ouyang Zhaoxi: "Flying Immortals!!!"

Me: "Meow..." (The pear that turned into a shooting star will definitely come back again!!!)

"Look at my saber skills! Sweeping thousands of troops!!" Ouyang Zhaoxi held the saber with both hands, and slashed at Yang Guo's front.

"I'll jump!" Twirling his buttocks, Yang Guo stuck out his thick lips with a pair of panda eyes, and stuck out his tongue with difficulty, "You can't hit! You can't hit! Look at my nameless swordsmanship."

"I'll dodge!" Ouyang Zhaoxi, who was unkempt and wearing two black palm prints on his chest, raised his chin in disdain, "Small tricks. Look at my gold iron horse!"

"My nameless swordsmanship."

"My tiger is going down the mountain."

"My nameless swordsmanship."

"My ten thousand swords return to one."

"My none..."

"Don't talk about Wuming swordsmanship anymore! Tell me I'll beat you! Damn it, is that the only way you hit back and forth!!" Ouyang Zhaoxi said angrily, grabbing Yang Guo's incomplete collar.

"Chi..." Shaking the muscles in his chest, Yang Guo successfully shook off Ouyang Zhaoxi's thieves' hand, looking at the sky with his eyes and the ground with his nostrils, and said with the 'bad spirit' around him, "You know P, this is called the move is not new, as long as it works! What an ignorant girl with long hair and short knowledge."

With veins throbbing on his forehead, Ouyang Zhaoxi clenched his right hand tightly, lowered his head and gritted his teeth and said, "Don't force me!"

"Cut, little boy..."

"Really don't force me!!"

"Fuck, I'm afraid of you!"

"Ah!! Close the door!! Let Ouyang Ke go!!!" Looking up to the sky and shouting, Ouyang Zhaoxi used the lion's roar to the extreme.

In less than a second, Ouyang Ke appeared in the hall with a whoosh, and said with a smile all over his face, "Pfft, Zhao'er, is he missing Daddy? Daddy is so touched..." As he spoke, he moved from his bosom He took out a suspicious red object and wiped the corner of his eyes.

"Ouyang Ke! Give me the red bellyband in your hand!!!"

"Ah!" With a sneer, Ouyang Ke raised his right hand and was about to stuff the bright red silk fabric into his bosom.

Director: 'Card!Camera, give me a close-up! ! "

Camera: -_-|||

I dragged a long bloodstain with difficulty and crawled back to the live broadcast site, snatched the microphone in the camera pocket, and said professionally, "According to my years of research, the apron in Ouyang Ke's hand is probably different from other people's." His wife, owned by Huang Rong.to know