toffee

Mental illness was not well understood in that era.Most doctors treat it as a mental illness completely, and some doctors advocate psychotherapy, but do not treat it as a disease.

Lu Yuxing put on the mask when he went out.The nurses in the department took him for various tests, including heart and lung function, thyroid function, etc., and finally asked him to do another test.

After all the examinations were completed, Lu Yuxing sat wearily on the rest chair in the corridor of the hospital, thinking of Tang Tang inexplicably.

He didn't know how long he could play the role of "boyfriend".He had doubts about Tang Tang, but now he felt guilty more.As for whether he likes it or not, he doesn't want to think about it.After all, a patient with an unstable mental state is not suitable for establishing an intimate relationship.

He leaned back in his chair and was lost in thought.After waiting for nearly half an hour, when the inspection report came out, it was already past the time to get off work.

Tan Zongsheng was still waiting for him in the office, without showing the slightest impatience.He read those report sheets one by one, with a complicated look on his face.

He took off his reading glasses and wiped his face wearily.

"Xiao Lu, you are mentally anxious." He pursed his lips, trying to communicate with Lu Yuxing in the most understandable way, "Uh...the physical performance is not great, and the physical value is also normal, but Your subjective emotional anxiety is more serious."

Lu Yuxing frowned, "But I do have many symptoms of physical anxiety. Insomnia, shortness of breath, chest tightness, don't these count?"

Tan Zongsheng was slightly taken aback, "You know a lot."

"I've read related books." Lu Yuxing pinched his index finger knuckles repeatedly, a little irritated.

"This is strange." Tan Zongsheng picked up the two report cards, touched the stubble on his lips, thoughtfully. "But all the indicators are normal..."

Lu Yuxing let out a long breath and leaned back on the chair.

In the end, Tan Zongsheng prescribed some small doses of medicine for him.It's because the medicine is three-point poisonous, and Lu Yuxing's body functions have no problems, so Tan Zongsheng told him to take it when the condition is serious.

He didn't say it, but Lu Yuxing knew that it was just for psychological comfort.

Before leaving, Tan Zongsheng called him to stop.

"Little Lu."

Lu Yuxing was walking to the door of the director's office and looked back at him. "Director Tan?"

"There is one more thing to note." Tan Zongsheng pushed his glasses with complicated eyes, "Doctors do not recommend that patients with severe anxiety disorder fall in love."

"Unstable intimate relationships are not conducive to remission," he said.

Lu Yuxing supported the edge of the door with one hand and looked at him silently.After a while, he nodded and said, "Got it."

It was already evening when the medicine was picked up in the hall.The lights in the outpatient department were only dimly lit, and in the ward of the emergency room, the voices of several old people chatting could be heard.

Lu Yuxing conveniently bought a translucent pill box, and put the round or flat pills in it.He counted the number carefully, as if greeting an old friend.

After dealing with all this silently, he skillfully stuffed the pill box into his bag, and let out a tired breath.

The sunset is gradually falling, and the bright moon is rising.

He stood on the steps in front of the outpatient building, feeling deeply powerless.

Back at the rental house, the notification light on the bedside landline was on, and there was a new message.

He didn't use the old-style telephone for too long, so he sat on the bed and fumbled for a while before opening the message.

Tang Tang's voice was distorted by the electric current, and it sounded in the room unexpectedly.

"Ah Xing, have you gone home?" His voice was a little tired, "I'm very tired from rehearsal today, so I won't bother." After a pause of two seconds, he continued on the phone: "Tomorrow is Friday. The banquet starts at seven o'clock in the evening, you have to remember to come."

Only then did Lu Yuxing think of it, and looked up at the calendar.

The notification light on the phone goes off, and the message ends.

The sudden silence made people feel at a loss.Lu Yuxing reluctantly got up to take a shower, but couldn't resist calling Tang Tang back.

He took out the heavy diary and looked for Tang Tang's name in the phone book on the last page.

The phone rang for two seconds and was quickly picked up.

There was a burst of panting that made people blush, rising and falling with the breath.Lu Yuxing frowned and asked, "Tang Tang, what are you doing?"

"Huh?" Tang Tang's breath was unsteady, and his intermittent voice came from the receiver. "I, I was just running."

As soon as he finished speaking, Lu Yuxing heard a dog barking from over there.

"Little Xing! Don't bark! It's my brother who's back!"

Tang Tang shouted a few words to the outside, and when the barking of the dog stopped, he turned around and chatted softly with Lu Yuxing.

"Ah Xing, you actually took the initiative to call me." He couldn't believe it, "I'm very happy."

Lu Yuxing held the receiver in his right hand, and picked out two pills from the medicine box with his left hand.

"Don't tell me the address of the banquet, how can I get there tomorrow?"

Tang Tang froze for a moment. "Huh? Didn't I tell you?" He was a little confused, "At Harbor Century Hotel. I thought I told you."

"En." Lu Yuxing poured a glass of water and swallowed the medicine.He raised his hand to wipe the water stains on his lips, and said, "Go to bed early, I will come tomorrow night."

At this time, I heard Tang Tang whisper "wait a minute", and then there was a collision sound from the receiver.Lu Yuxing paused slightly with the hand holding the glass, feeling nervous for no reason.

He pressed the receiver to his ear and heard the conversation coming from there.

"Who are you on the phone with?" A deep, serious male voice asked.

The voice was muffled, it should be Tang Tang covering the microphone with his hand.

"A friend." Tang Tang said with a coquettish smile, "Brother, go and see Xiao Xing, he misses you so much today, he can't be coaxed."

His voice was crisp and clear, coupled with the indescribably kind and gentle tone, Lu Yuxing could even imagine the scene of him pulling the man's arm and making out with him with a smile on his face.

The medicine he just took didn't work, and Lu Yuxing still felt extremely irritable at the moment.

"Well, wait a minute." The man Tang Tang called his brother didn't leave. He asked in a cold voice, "Have you finished the 3000 meters? I'll check it later."

"I'm done running, I'm very good." Tang Tang replied.

There was a brief silence in the receiver.The man sat down and his voice became clearer. "Have you found your girlfriend for tomorrow's banquet?"

"You don't have to look for it, I invited my classmates." Tang Tang interrupted him urgently, "That classmate of mine is very experienced in attending such banquets, and is more reliable than the rich ladies you are looking for."

"Oh?" The man's tone was playful, he got up and walked away. "Don't forget, what am I asking you to attend this banquet for?"

Tang Tang replied obediently: "I know."

When the door slammed, Tang Tang let go of the microphone, and asked Lu Yuxing anxiously, "Ah Xing, I'm sorry. Are you still there?"

Lu Yuxing lay on the head of the bed and rubbed the space between his brows.

"Yeah." He answered through his nose. "It's getting late, I'll rest first."

Tang Tang was a little disappointed.The two said good night to each other and hung up the phone.

The interview column was scheduled to appear in the newspaper on Saturday, and everyone on the team worked all morning to get it done.

At noon, Lu Yuxing didn't even bother to go downstairs to eat lunch, and rested on the office chair.It's rare that we don't have to accept editor-in-chief Zhu's scolding, and everyone finally feels relieved.Bai Wan invited a few people to celebrate at the Japanese restaurant downstairs, but Lu Yuxing declined the invitation and continued to sleep.

He had insomnia again last night.

The medicine given by Director Tan didn't work at all, so Lu Yuxing had to find a sleeping pill from home and take a sleeping pill, and managed to sleep for three hours.

He stacked the books on the table to make it higher, and was just about to rest on his stomach for a while, when he heard a familiar voice behind him.

Most of the colleagues in the office went out to eat, and the originally noisy space seemed very quiet.

"Excuse me, where is Lu Yuxing's seat?"

Tang Tang's voice was very soft, as if he was afraid of scaring anyone.

Lu Yuxing turned his head and saw him carrying an exquisite bento, asking his colleagues at the door.Tang Tang was wearing an orange-blue contrasting baseball uniform today, like a high school student who didn't know much about the world, he ran to the company to find his parents.

"Here." Lu Yuxing got up and walked over, leading him to his desk. "How did you come?"

Tang Tang looked at him, the dimples on his face appeared again.

"I called yesterday and felt that you were not in a good mood, so I came to take a look." He put the lunch box on Lu Yuxing's table, and looked around cautiously.

"Sit here." Lu Yuxing pointed to Bai Wan's seat.

Tang Tang glanced at the pink shelves and mouse pads on Bai Wan's desk, and without saying anything, pulled up the chair and sat down.

"You didn't come to watch me, afraid that I might run away at night, did you?" Lu Yuxing opened the box of the bento, the corners of his mouth slightly curled up. "No, no," Tang Tang quickly waved his hands, "Ah Xing, you are not the kind of person who breaks promises."

He stretched out his legs, tapped his toes, and slid the chair to Lu Yuxing's side.

The office was surprisingly quiet, with the occasional sound of paper being flipped.

"Ah Xing, are you unhappy?" Tang Tang leaned closer and looked at Lu Yuxing's profile.

He got too close, and his warm breath fell on the side of Lu Yuxing's neck.

"No." Lu Yuxing flipped the top layer of rice casually, picked up a small piece of octopus, and put it back into the lunch box.

The anxiety caused by insomnia had reached a peak, and Lu Yuxing didn't want to vent these emotions on Tang Tang.

He moved the bento to the corner, brought over the stacked books just now, and forced a smile.

"Hey, let me sleep for a while first."

The author says:

The chapter title comes from Mai Junlong's "Life and Death Fatigue"

"Gambling more fiercely than murderers, they always carry knives in their dreams."

Anxiety disorders are dealt with artistically in this article.don't substitute reality