unrequited love forbidden

Explanation

want a boyfriend or not

There was a moment of panic in Fu Qingzhou's eyes, but the panic was fleeting, and soon he returned to his usual appearance, opening his mouth to explain.

"Don't rush to explain." Jiang Xiao put his arms around his shoulders and led him to the living room, "Of course, it may be that I cried so touchingly that you couldn't help crying, which is barely reasonable."

"Uh..." Fu Qingzhou stared at him quietly.

"In the last life, Mr. Fu told me that he only learned to draw after he got into a car accident." Jiang Xiao narrowed his eyes and said, "Also, I played a video for you that night and saw a painting on your bed. You will hide it soon, but I think why the curly hair in the painting looks so much like me?"

"Of course, you can also say that I'm narcissistic." Jiang Xiao dragged him to sit on the sofa, "I've been with Mr. Fu for ten years, and I can clearly remember some of his little habits and actions, some of which are—— A habit he formed after he lost his leg.

For example, he doesn’t like to ride a car, and because he wears prosthetics, he always rubs the acupoints on the inner thighs. For example, when he eats, he stays a little farther away from the dining table than ordinary people...Of course, you can also say that these are all my imaginations, after all. It's something very subtle. "

"And that day I accidentally saw you losing your temper on the balcony. Your little finger was injured, and you used to use three fingers when you used your mobile phone to make calls, but your fingers are still fine now."

Jiang Xiao said to himself, and kept denying himself, "But it's dark, I may not see it clearly, I have revealed the car accident to you, not only are you not curious, but you can avoid it, the most I can't explain a little--"

"I kissed your forehead that day, you were cold like you just got out of the water, and the day we quarreled, your behavior," Jiang Xiao paused, "It's like post-traumatic stress disorder, you are afraid A car accident, and even fear of me appearing in a scene that you can't control, so it's not wrong to say that you are overly possessive, you are just afraid that something will happen to me."

Jiang Xiao looked at Fu Qingzhou, and couldn't bear to continue, "I know my guess is outrageous, but I can't help but think about these things, and I even took the initiative to confess to you that I was born again, Brother Zhou, I was so unreasonable before. The entanglement is not only because the current Fu Qingzhou is different from Fu Zong 20 years later in my heart."

Fu Qingzhou's face was as pale as paper, but he still pretended to look at him calmly, "So, you hope that I, too, will be reborn 20 years later?"

"It's a lie to say that I don't want it, but I hope that whether it is now or in the future, you will be safe and sound." Jiang Xiao pulled the corner of his mouth, "Rebirth is not a good thing, brother Zhou, you can actually see that Yes, before, especially these days before I confessed to you, my mental state was very bad, and I have been seeing a psychiatrist."

"I discussed the issue of rebirth with him. The focus of the discussion was whether the person 20 years ago and the person 20 years ago are considered the same person, and whether I really like you now."

Jiang Xiao laughed at himself: "Human psychology has the instinct to seek advantages and avoid disadvantages, but I just like to push myself into dead ends, so I was in pain during that time. My psychiatrist told me not to use it as much as possible." Impossible things can be set on yourself, and even if it is true, you must learn to be content."

Jiang Xiao let out a long sigh of relief, "Later, I thought about it a lot. Why did I come back from rebirth? I have normal perceptions of my grandfather, my dad, and Li Bowen—everyone except you. For you alone, I want to push myself to death, desperately telling myself that I am not alone."

Fu Qingzhou stared at him blankly, his slightly trembling hand was firmly pressed on his knee, and then Jiang Xiao firmly clasped it in his palm.

"Because Fu Qingzhou is not only Fu Qingzhou, but also not only my crush, he is also my hope of living in those ten years. He is unique in my heart, far more than being a person or a crush. The presence.

Therefore, no blasphemy is allowed in my subconscious, in other words, I dared to chase you before because I felt that you were not my one who paid off..."

Fu Qingzhou chuckled lightly.

"It's quite interesting." Jiang Xiao also smiled, "I didn't realize so much, co-authored for so many years, I didn't regard you as a person, but as some kind of too abstract and irreplaceable spiritual pillar , I didn’t dare to chase after him, but now I dare not, and I didn’t dare to say it before I died.”

Fu Qingzhou's arm convulsed unnaturally.

Jiang Xiao rubbed his arm vigorously, "Fu Qingzhou, no one likes to over-analyze one's heart. It's not easy to see one's secrets and embarrassments at a glance, but there are some things that you have to say, and the rest are left behind." Only those wounds with deep bone festering and sores can heal."

"I..." Jiang Xiao grabbed his hand and looked at him fixedly, "I actually want to understand that there is a Fu Qingzhou in this world, which is already a rare thing for me Big blessing.

It doesn't matter if you were 20 years ago, 20 years from now, or 80 or [-] years from now, it's all the same to me, I like you all. "

"I want to take back the will to live that I entrusted to you, and I will no longer regard you as a hope to live." Jiang Xiao said: "I want to live for myself, and then learn to love you."

Fu Qingzhou's eyes were a little startled, as if he really knew Jiang Xiao for the first time.

"How is it, handsome?" Jiang Xiao raised an eyebrow at him.

Fu Qingzhou twitched the corners of his mouth, then lowered his eyes, "Handsome."

Simply stunning.

He was the bravest Jiang Xiao he had ever seen.

Jiang Xiao held up his chin, "Brother Zhou, you are the smartest person I have ever met. You have more eyes than holes in the ground. I know you don't want to talk about my guesses. There are a hundred reasons to convince me to fool you." I don't need to explain, and I don't need to worry, because since I dared to test you, and now I dare to tell you bluntly, I don't care anymore. "

"Whether it's from the past or the future." Jiang Xiao's thumb gently brushed his cheek, "The only thing I can do, and the only thing I have to do, is to learn to love this Fu Qingzhou in front of me."

Fu Qingzhou looked at his gentle and firm eyes, almost subconsciously wanting to dodge, his layers of thoughts and designs were almost defeated by Jiang Xiao's overly straightforward and simple offensive.

"Fu Qingzhou, I have been sick and wanted to commit suicide more than once, I know what it feels like." Jiang Xiao stretched out his arms and hugged him into his arms, "Before confessing including refusing, I also wanted to provoke you to take the initiative The frank thought is that I was too hesitant and tempted you too much, which made you worry all the time, I'm sorry."

"Fu Qingzhou, now yours is very good."

Fu Qingzhou has seen countless people of all kinds in his life. No matter who they are, everyone likes to wear a mask. He never believed that someone would cut open their heart so cruelly yet gently, and expose it to him at a glance.

No one has ever told him so firmly that you are fine.

Jiang Xiao is too much.

Every time you confess, you have to say a lot of words, and then let someone like him who never cries be infected by him.

Fu Qingzhou buried his head on his shoulder, gritted his teeth forcefully, and said in a deep voice, "Is it fun to play dumb?"

"It's not pretending to be stupid, it's being afraid." Jiang Xiao raised his head and smiled at him innocently, "I'm not stupid, how can you pity me and love me dearly?"

Fu Qingzhou covered his face with his hand, turned his head away, "You...let me be quiet."

"In the ten years when I was your driver, I only thought about you besides driving." Jiang Xiao held his hand, lowered his head and gently pinched his knuckles, and muttered: "I know you better than you, It's a pity that I just came back from rebirth, my own mental state is not right, every day I feel dizzy like a dream, I don't know what I am doing all day, otherwise I would have..."

His voice was vague, Fu Qingzhou couldn't hear clearly, "What are you mumbling about?"

Jiang Xiao grinned at him, still looking silly, but sadly, Fu Qingzhou still felt that this person was too cute and innocent, so he could only take a deep breath.

"Fu Qingzhou, I've already shared all my thoughts with you little by little." Jiang Xiao leaned on the sofa next to him and muttered to him: "Whether you think it's good or bad, you have to I like me, I like the me in front of me."

Fu Qingzhou twitched the corners of his mouth, reached out to pull his cheeks, and narrowed his eyes, "Jiang Xiao, you're really not stupid at all."

Fortunately, he still felt that this person was careless and heartless.

Jiang Xiao's face was deformed by him, and he was not annoyed, he just bent his eyes and smiled at him, "That's still not as smart as you."

The temptations come and go, nothing more than letting Fu Qingzhou see the most embarrassing side, and then tie this person firmly by his side.

Not the smartest way, but the safest.

At least Fu Qingzhou didn't slam the door and leave like before.

When Jiang Xiao hugged Fu Qingzhou's waist and hugged his relatives, a hanging heart finally fell heavily to the ground.

Ever since Fu Qingzhou kissed him forcefully in the toilet, Jiang Xiao liked to let him sit on his lap and kiss him, as if the other person was his own.

And Fu Qingzhou always likes to gnaw his neck, which is actually a bit difficult for Fu Qingzhou, but Jiang Xiao likes to take advantage of the situation and grab his neck.

Fu Qingzhou's neck was fair and slender, and the curve of his head was beautiful and smooth when he lowered his head. Every time Jiang Xiao carried him out of the car, he could see it as soon as he lowered his head.

The beauty and warmth hidden in the indifference made him covet and become obsessed.

Fu Qingzhou is strong and ruthless, as if he is always calm and decisive, but peeling off that layer of inhumane shell——

Jiang Xiao's forehead was pressed, and he leaned back on the back of the sofa. Before he could take back his aggressive and possessive eyes, he stared at Fu Qingzhou like a starving wolf with longing green eyes. Light.

Fu Qingzhou stared at him condescendingly, the small mole at the corner of his eye was looming, Jiang Xiao's Adam's apple moved slightly, and there were still red marks left on it.

He wanted to move, but Fu Qingzhou lightly pressed his thumb on the side of his neck, pushing him back.

Fu Qingzhou looked at him with a half-smile, "Do you want me to be like you, explain everything clearly before falling in love?"

"No." Jiang Xiao relaxed on the sofa, "I said it was my choice, I just want you to know and rest assured. As for your matter, you can talk about it when you want to talk about it. It doesn't matter if you don't talk about it. I will sooner or later Know."

"So confident?" Fu Qingzhou slowly approached him.

"Ang." Jiang Xiao smiled lazily: "Anyway, you can't run away."

Fu Qingzhou raised his eyebrows.

Jiang Xiao hugged him and buried his face in his sweater. The soft and warm feel of the wool made people feel extremely at ease, "Fu Qingzhou, you really like me."

"Didn't you like it before?" Fu Qingzhou stretched out his hand and gently pressed down the curly hair on his head.

"I used to like it too." Jiang Xiao muffled: "You liked Jiang Xiao before, but now you like me."

It sounds a little wronged, but also a little reserved and proud.

Fu Qingzhou ruffled his curly hair and didn't speak.

"Brother Zhou, do you want a boyfriend?" Jiang Xiao asked.

"I want one." Fu Qingzhou replied.

Jiang Xiao raised his head and stared at him, "How many more do you want?"

Fu Qingzhou sighed, "I can't understand any of them, and I'm afraid I won't have enough brains if there are more."

"You are humble."

"You flatter me."