[The Pretender Lou Cheng] Non-public Notes

With Der Spiegel's order, the dinner at home was extraordinarily sumptuous that day.Mingjing kept putting food into Minglou's bowl, as if he would starve him if he didn't bring food for him, and kept asking Minglou to bring food for Mingcheng as well.

Ming Lou didn't see Ming Tai at the dining table, so he asked, and Ming Jing explained that Tai had gone to see Miss Cheng at Dr. Su's house.Minglou nodded after hearing this, and joked with a smile that Mingjing would soon be able to hug his nephew.On the contrary, Mingcheng, who was most concerned about Mingtai's whereabouts on weekdays, didn't say a word. He sat quietly on the right-hand side of Minglou and had dinner. Something unusual happened, but Ming Jing always felt that he was too quiet tonight, so quiet that people almost ignored his existence.

It is said that Lou has always been very sensitive to Mingcheng's emotions, but tonight he seemed to be unaware of it, chatting with Mingjing as usual.

Mingjing cooperates with Minglou to pretend to be normal, but his eyes can't help but drift towards Mingcheng.But she trusted her two younger brothers, so she didn't ask anything.

After dinner, Mingcheng followed Minglou back to his study.

Minglou knew in his heart what Mingcheng was making a fuss about, but he wouldn't back down on this matter, so he ignored him and let him sit on the sofa alone and process the documents silently.Minglou thought, Ah Cheng is going to lose his temper after all, and after one night, the anger will disappear.

As the night was getting late, Minglou's business was almost done. He got up from his desk and walked to the bedroom, ready to take a rest. He thought that Mingcheng would ignore him tonight, but Mingcheng would soon He took out Minglou's pajamas from the closet in one step.

As usual, Mingcheng stretched the collar of his pajamas and stood behind Minglou to carry out his butler's duties to the end, but when Minglou stretched his arms into the sleeves of the pajamas, Mingcheng suddenly asked, "What about me?"

Minglou was taken aback for a moment before realizing Mingcheng's meaning.This was the first sentence that Mingcheng took the initiative to say to himself tonight. Minglou hesitated for a few seconds, not wanting to delve into this issue any further and make Mingcheng even more angry, so he wanted to say a few words to calm his emotions.

But Mingcheng didn't seem to want any answer from Minglou.He just asked so plainly, as if the voice didn't come from the movement of his lips.Mingcheng picked up the suit that Minglou had changed by the bedside, turned around and put it carefully into the closet.

He knew that he would cooperate with all Minglou's actions. As long as it was Minglou's decision, he would still support it even if he disagreed with it in his heart. It's just that there were some words that he kept in his heart and always felt a little wronged.

So have you considered my feelings?

Mingcheng really wanted to ask him this question, but he didn't say it in the end. He put away his suit, bowed slightly to Minglou, said "good night", then turned and walked out the door.

"Wait a minute." Minglou called out to stop him.

Mingcheng paused, turned his head slightly backwards, and looked at Minglou, "Brother, is there anything else?"

Minglou chased after him in a few steps, took Mingcheng's hand and sat down on the edge of the bed, thought carefully for a moment before saying, "I know you don't support my decision, but—"

"No, I support it." Mingcheng shook his head and interrupted Minglou's words. He looked firmly into Minglou's eyes. He had already seen Minglou's firmness in Minglou's eyes, but he felt that Minglou He didn't see his intentions clearly, "You know that I will unconditionally support any decision you make. Mingtai is also my younger brother. I understand what kind of mood you have in choosing between yourself and Mingtai. It's just that big brother ...Have you ever thought about it, maybe besides sacrificing you or Mingtai, we have other options, maybe I can replace..."

"Shut up!" Minglou suddenly raised his voice, yelling at Mingcheng.

Mingcheng lowered his head, and continued to speak softly, "I am only the steward of the Ming family to the outside world. I am an existence that is easier to betray the Ming family than Mingtai, and it is easier for the Ming family to get rid of the relationship. I..."

"I tell you to shut up!" Minglou suddenly raised his palm in anger, just a little bit, he was about to wave his uncontrollably trembling arm.However, looking at Mingcheng's wet eyes looking at him, Minglou still didn't fall down after this slap, he grabbed Mingcheng's collar, gritted his teeth and said every word, "This idea, you should hurry up!" Forget about it! Don't even think about it!"

"Why can't it be me?!" Mingcheng roared in a low voice, and he questioned Minglou with red eyes, "This person can be you! It can be Mingtai! Why can't it be me?!"

Yes, why can't it be Mingcheng?

Minglou looked at Mingcheng's stubborn red eyes, his thick eyelashes were wetted by clear drops of water, Minglou raised his hand to clasp Mingcheng's head and pressed him to his chest, and he didn't speak for a long time.

Mingcheng has never bumped against Minglou so impulsively, as if all the strength in his body was withdrawn with this low growl, he obediently pressed his forehead against Minglou's neck, his hands tightly clutching Minglou's soft pajamas. The tears in the eye sockets finally fell on Minglou's legs with a "patta" due to the effect of gravity, smearing a small wet mark.

Minglou slowly ran along Mingcheng's slightly stiff hair, and occasionally rubbed the back of his neck gently with his fingertips, his gaze drifted away, as if recalling a long time ago, "Ah Cheng, do you still remember?" When we were in Paris, we just became life and death partners, and you asked me what would I do if you died?"

Mingcheng nodded, sniffled, and replied in a muffled voice, "I remember, but you didn't answer me at that time."

"Yes, I did not answer you. It's not that I didn't think about it, I just didn't want to say these things so early." Minglou paused for a moment while stroking Mingcheng, he sighed, and continued slowly, " My teacher once told me that a life and death partner is each other's half life. I taught you the same way at that time. It will be a matter of time before Wang Tianfeng and I part ways. I have different revolutionary ideas and different ways of doing things from him. Although we are fighting In the past, I had given each other all the trust, but after all, I couldn’t integrate their half lives into a symbiosis. With my status at the time, I thought I would not have any real life and death partners, but you appeared. Your appearance It makes me very angry. I just want you to live a stable life as a scholar, but I never thought that you would live up to my good intentions and make such an important decision behind my back. But after being angry, I feel lucky again, You will be my partner in life and death."

"Ah Cheng," Minglou called out in a low voice, with indescribable emotions hidden in the faintly unsteady voice, "The elder sister is like a sister like a mother, the kindness of nurturing, Mingtai's biological mother's kindness of saving life , Losing either of them, I would exchange my life for theirs, I would die for them. But losing you, I will live, I will be like a person with only half life left , life would be worse than death."

"You ask me why I can't be you." Minglou lowered his head slightly, and put a kiss on Mingcheng's hair, "Probably because I am too selfish."