Full marks

252. For two days, you leaned on me, leaned on me, and missed me, but I... can't touch you anymore...

At nine o'clock on Sunday morning, Lantian Yeyu took Lansha to Sha Ying's hometown.

Except for the 50 days when Ye Yu gave birth to Lan Ye, Lan Tian would take Lan Sha and Ye Yu to Sha Ying’s hometown by the Yangtze River on weekends every half a month. It would be dangerous for Yu to drive with Lansha, and it would be better for Ye Yu to hold Lansha.

When she came to Sha Ying's house, Sha Ying's mother happened to be there, and her father was still at work. Lan Tian took out many fruits and dry goods from the trunk and put them into the living room of Sha Ying's house.

Sha Ying's room has been completely repurposed for other purposes, and Lan Tian never wants to go in after seeing it once, and every time she comes with Lan Sha in her arms, her eyes almost turn red when she enters the door.

Sha Ying's father and mother didn't blame Lan Tian for anything, but when they saw Lan Tian, ​​they couldn't help but think of their daughter. In order to train her to dance, they saved money to find a good teacher for her, and the piles of honors... …

Before leaving, Lan Tian put a wad of money into the hands of Sha Ying's mother as before: "Don't refuse, she asked me to give it to you, please accept it, if I don't accept it, I can only kneel... Be sure to take care of yourself Call me for anything, please don't see outsiders." Tears still welled up in my eyes.

Every time before leaving, I always stand by the Yangtze River for a while, shed tears for a while, hugging Lansha, and never lessened the sadness: "Yiyi, do you know that because of you, there is no her... Yiyi... you Be sensible... Mom misses her so much... Mom misses her so much..."

"Mom, don't cry, Yiyi is good."

"Yi..."

Ye Yu hugged Lan Sha over: "Yi Yi is good, mommy hugs, let mom rest for a while."

She practiced a set of swordsmanship by the Yangtze River, and her heart was terribly hurt:

Rusha...I'll show you...you look at me...are you looking at me...you...you walk too fast...you owe me too much...too much... …

"Mom is great!"

"Does Yiyi want to know like mother in the future?" Ye Yu leaned against Yiyi's little face.

"En!" Lan Sha nodded vigorously.

"Yiyi already knows that her mother will be so sad when she comes here, so Yiyi must be sensible, listen to her mother, and be good. If Yiyi is good, her mother will be happy, you know?"

"Ok!"

"Yiyi... Mommy is also sad, please help Mommy wipe..."

"Mommy don't cry!"

"Yi... Yiyi... you have to grow up quickly and tell your mother... you can't torture yourself... stop torturing yourself..." She looked at her blue sky in pain... such a life... for a There are so many people, it's too late...

As usual, I washed my face with Yangtze River water, stood in the river water with my sword in my hand, and stood in a daze for a while...

Returning to Ye Yu's side, holding a sword in one hand and hugging Lan Sha in the other, there was still a lot of indistinguishable water on that face.

Ye Yu took Lan Tian's hand and walked towards the car.

Lan Sha was saying, "Mom, Yi Yi is good."

"Well, Yiyi is so good."

The car drove to the city, Lan Sha sat on Ye Yu's lap and looked out the window, in Ye Yu's peripheral vision, Lan Tian's heart was still by the Yangtze River...

Every time I get home, Lan Tian will take a shower for a long time...

Almost a year has passed, that heart still hurts when touched, Ye Yu can't find a way to close the door of her heart, whether it is the theory of fate that scares her or she is really powerless to love, Ye Yu doesn't know .The anniversary of Sha Ying's death is coming soon. On August 8, Ye Yu will always remember this day. At that time, she was tearing down the photos with Lan Tian in this villa. She didn't ask Lan Tian for anything at that time, why? Did God not let Sha Ying come back with her?So Lan Tian's heart followed Sha Ying to a faraway place where she could not return. What should she do so that her Lan Tian could stop being sad...

At eight o'clock in the morning on August 2004, 8, in front of Sha Ying's grave, the driver turned his back to Ye Yu from a distance, and Ye Yu bowed deeply to Sha Ying with a white chrysanthemum...

The name on the tombstone——Sha Ying, perhaps in Sha Ying's opinion, the name "Shasha" is more pleasant, how did she call it wrong, what was the scene like at that time...was it daytime, or was it night...was it sunny, was it sunny? Rainy day... It's the dormitory, it's the classroom... It's the first year... The second year... It can't be the third year... The precious companionship, actually endured the confession until after one south and one north...

"I know you are in love...I know...I know very well..." Faced with this name, tears flowed like rain. This was the first sentence Ye Yu said, and she still had a lot to say...

"Shusha...I came to see you...I have to be early...don't run into her...I really have something to say to you...Shusha...are you okay...are you watching us from the sky ...have you seen what she looks like...

...you are gone...leaving a bunch of people alive...very hard...I miss you, it hurts when I touch her...the dozens of white hairs on her temples...I have no ability to remove it for her... ...You must feel sorry for her...Isn't it...the fact is that you love her so much...I love you so much...but...she doesn't even give me a chance to feel sorry...

It's been a year, and many things have happened in this year. As you can see, I gave birth to a child, which is her child. I absolutely believe that you are still glad that I am pregnant with her child... Let her be more responsible Live on... Although when she knew about it, she wanted me to kill her...

Rusha...but I never took this child...to ask her for what you should see...I gave her hand to yours...why do you go first like this...why do you always Gotta give her some wounds that don't heal...I've helped her twice...this time...it's so hard...swish...I don't know how long I can last...

Do you know how much I wish I was the one who died... If... If it was me who died... She will stand up soon because of you... But why is it you... I... really can't think of a way How to make her enjoy life enthusiastically again...instead of living in this world with a body...

She has read a lot of poetry and books, but she also began to believe in fate. How sad it is for a doctor to believe in fate, but... sometimes I have to believe it. In [-], I didn’t study in Jingang and let you meet her first. My father has such a big family business, but I want to study medicine and then meet her in college... Witness the relationship between you and her all the way, and then let me deeply Deeply infatuated with her arms...It's because of you...I fell in love with her...It's also because of you...I have to let her go again...I don't know what's wrong with me...I found in this world I'm so scared of you... now that you're gone I'm even more scared of you... I'm lonely... because she's lonely... because you're lonely...

Rusha... Can you give me some guidance... I am alone... It's hard... You see, I only have one leg, and it still hurts after standing for a long time... Once the prosthesis is removed... Even getting clothes for her is difficult I find it very troublesome... rustle... but I don't even dare to feel inferior. I don't want to add to her pain...

no...how can i talk about my legs like that...i can stand up straight...i'm fine...swish what i said today...i wish you heard...we've never been against each other...she left me In the end, I just ask you to help me love her. I didn't ask her for anything. Now that you are gone, I just ask you to find a way to tell her... I can help you love her... just let your heart live in my heart face...but really give me a chance...can you...can you tell her? "

"Xiaoyu..."

Lan Tian's voice came from behind her, she quickly wiped away her tears, and turned around, Lan Tian and Lan Fang were behind her, Lan Tian was holding Lan Sha in her hands.

Lan Tian put chrysanthemums and tulips in front of Sha Ying's stele: "Sister, you and Xiaoyu go first, let me wait."

Lan Fang bowed, Jiao Lan Sha also bowed, and left with Ye Yu.

About 30 meters away, Ye Yu turned around and saw that Lan Tian was already sitting in front of Sha Ying's stele, with her forehead resting on Sha Ying's name on the stele...

Ye Yu walked to the car with Lan Fang on his arm.

"When did you come?"

"What you said to Shasha, both I and she heard."

"Fang, how long do you think she will sit here?"

"I don't know, today is Saturday, let her."

"What happened to me and Sha Ying? I don't hate her for coming back, but hate her for leaving. I don't even understand."

"Xiaoyu, you are tired. It seems that your voice is not right. You should take a good rest when you go back."

"I have to go back to the company, there is a meeting at ten o'clock."

"Then take two medicines. Is it because the company has a lot of things lately? You always rush back to feed Ye Ye, and you come here so early today. If you are exhausted, she will be sad."

"Now go back first, and then go to the company. There should be time. I'm fine. I'll take the medicine with me at home."

About to walk out of the cemetery, a familiar face is walking into the cemetery holding a large bouquet of roses—Sun Qian.

The two stopped instinctively, looking at Sun Qian who was getting closer and closer, who had been in love for a while, and looked ten years old... When did those sunken eyes lose all their brilliance...

He didn't even know how to greet Sun Qian, and Sun Qian kept silent and only looked at Lan Fang and Ye Yu.

Thinking that she came from Beijing after all, Lan Fang couldn't help saying hello: "Hi, Sun Qian."

"Hello." He looked at Ye Yu again, "Hello."

"Hello." Ye Yu responded politely, but she was trying to find out Sun Qian's true emotions. If he hadn't still loved Sha Ying, he wouldn't have come all the way on this day. He might have hatred, but it was enough to hate Lan Tian strangle...

With nothing more to say, Sun Qian searched for Sha Ying's cemetery without asking where Sha Ying was...

Lan Fang called to stop him: "Sun Qian! I'll take you there! Xiaoyu, take Lansha back first in the driver's car, don't worry, nothing will happen."

Ye Yu approached him: "Sun Qian, let her look at each of us quietly... okay? When she was alive, maybe she had seen too many disputes, and she felt too sorry for what she caused to her beloved. She left because of one person, but she will never complain... She just hopes that that person will be fine... please... just please... be the same as that person... be fine... okay ... If you want to hate ... she will not be able to reach out to stop it ... but it will definitely make her feel so sad that she can return to this world ... "

Sun Qian was already in tears... Painful and weak as old age...

"If I hate...I will kill that person...If I don't love...I won't come today..."

"Thank you."

Ye Yu nodded, turned and left with Lan Sha in his arms.

Following Lan Fang to Sha Ying's tomb, Sun Qian saw Lan Tian leaning on Sha Ying's tombstone... His face haggard because of sadness, no longer the style of the past...

He looked at Sha Ying's name... bowed...

"Aying... no one told me about you...

I can't walk into your world from beginning to end...but you know...I love you...

Excuse me for 1 minute with her...give me the right to miss you...

Don't worry... I know what I should do..."

He stretched out his hand to touch Sha Ying's name...he was heartbroken...too late to regret...

"It's better to stay by my side...I'm too impatient...I'm sorry...I'm sorry...Aying...I'm sorry..."

Lan Fang told Ye Yusun on the phone that she had returned to Beijing before, and there was no dispute with Lan Tian.

At eight o'clock in the evening, Lan Tian still didn't come back, so Ye Yu called Lan Tian.

"sky?"

"what's up?"

"When will you be back? Where are you?"

"Come back soon, I'm fine, you rest first."

"Can you tell me what time it is? Yiyi misses you."

"...At ten o'clock, coax her to sleep first."

"Where are you?"

"I'm hanging up."

"Day? God? God?"

Lan Tiancai came back at 10:30, Yiyi rushed over as soon as she entered the door: "Mom!"

"Why isn't Yiyi still asleep? Did she not listen to Mommy and grandma?"

Yi Yi hugged Lan Tian on her shoulders and said nothing.

"Did you eat?" Lan Tian's mother saw that her daughter's eyes were swollen. She knew that today was Sha Ying's death day, so she didn't dare to blame her for coming back late for no reason.

"Eat, eat."

"Eat some more, I'll keep it for you. You're so dirty, go take a shower first, come down immediately and eat something before going to bed."

"Oh."

"Come on, Yiyi, be good, grandma hugs, Yiyi has to sleep!"

"Sleep with mom!"

"Heh... Yiyi is obedient, mom is very tired, why don't you sleep with grandma?" Lan Tian's mother wanted to hug Lan Sha, but Lan Sha hugged her very tightly this time.

Ye Yu came down from the elevator upstairs and saw that Lan Tian's eyes were severely swollen.

"You are back, have you eaten yet?"

"It doesn't matter whether she eats or not, she will eat some after taking a shower." Lan Tian's mother answered.

In fact, everyone knows that this person may not have eaten for a day.

"Yiyi? Come to Mommy to hug, okay? Let Mommy wash Xiangxiang before hugging Yiyi?"

Lan Sha let go of her little hand and rushed towards Ye Yu, who was finally coaxed to sleep by Ye Yu.

No one has the heart to talk to her about her emotions, as if she would erupt at any time, enduring the solitary life now, Ye Yu didn't know if Lan Tian was really asleep at night, she listened to the movement of Lan Tian, ​​and knew that Lan Tian turned over several times in one night , and faintly heard Lan Tian sobbing... But she couldn't disturb that yearning...

The next day, Sunday, Lan Tian went out after breakfast at [-] o'clock, and it started to drizzle...

Ye Yu called Lan Tian, ​​but Lan Tian turned off his phone.

She knew that she might go to that place again. Once she thought about it, she couldn't hold back her longing. On August 2003, 8, she endured unbearable pain. On August 28, she hugged the sand that could no longer breathe. Ying returned to Golden Port...she failed to bring back her rustle...she really hated fate...

At ten o'clock, Ye Yu asked the driver to drive to the cemetery. Sure enough, he saw the blue sky leaning against Sha Ying's tombstone from a distance... The light rain had already wet that person's clothes... His face... couldn't tell if it was tears it's rain...

She clung to the tombstone powerlessly, Sha Ying's name hurt this person's heart to death, and the scene of clinging to each other silently with the tombstone also hurt Ye Yu's heart to death... She again Will it sit there for a day?Should I get her an umbrella?

no...don't bother...

Ye Yu walked back holding the umbrella and asked the driver to find a stranger to deliver an umbrella to Lan Tian. Of course, it doesn't matter whether Lan Tian uses this umbrella or not.

After dinner, Lan Tian hadn't come back yet, Ye Yu waited in the room with her mobile phone in hand, watching Lan Ye who was sleeping soundly, her cough became more and more serious.

I still couldn't help but dial the phone, and the phone was still turned off. It was already nine o'clock in the evening, and the drizzle had stopped in the evening, but it was already autumn, and the wind was no longer gentle.