The world controlled by dice [Western Fantasy]

June 6.Sunday.In the morning, Siles received a long letter from Marina Kelan.

He was even surprised when he took the envelope from the postman.It hadn't occurred to him at all that Marina Kellan would write him a special letter.

Eight days earlier, Marina Kellan had given birth to a baby girl with difficulty in her second-floor room at 32 Lowell Street.

About the child's father, about the turmoil of the past century, about the seemingly cursed fate of the Kailan family, about Marina Kailan's ever-changing and subtle identity...all kinds of questions, they have not yet been able to solve the problem. get an answer.

However, when the conspiracy of the Graves family was discovered and made public, the whole thing still caused quite a disturbance in the city.

People may not know what the Graves family has done, but at least they know - another group of followers of the old gods!

In the past less than a year, the residents of Lamifa City really met several groups of followers of the old gods, covering all aspects of their daily life: food, hospitals, real estate...

The residents of Ramifa City can be said to be outraged.

Nevertheless, what happened at No. 32 Lowell Street, those bloody and cruel plots, along with the heavy rain on May 5, disappeared in the early summer of Ramifa City.

Recently, Siles' schedule has become normal again.It should be said that before the rainy holiday in July, he should be able to enjoy a peaceful and ordinary time.

The gambling incident - that's what they called it for the time being - was finally handed over to the Church of the Past, the Historical Society and the officials of the Duchy of Const.Siles himself was not involved.

As for why he appeared there?Because that was the original residence of his faithful teaching assistant, they realized that there seemed to be a group of criminals engaged in some kind of conspiracy, and then rescued a pregnant woman by mistake.

...This is the reason given by Siles.Whether those investigators who followed up believed it or not, that's what he said anyway.

However, the Church of the Past, who had helped Siles to finish the underground arch incident before, can be said to be quite familiar with this set of procedures.Coincidentally, the former church investigator who was in charge of following up on the gambling incident this time was Dominic Milner.

The dark-skinned Mr. Investigator stared at Siles with complicated eyes, and said, "Do you know how long it took us to get away from the cumbersome and complicated information about the Grayson Incident and the Underground Arch Incident?"

Siles touched his nose in embarrassment, then silently patted Dominic on the shoulder.

In short, because the acquaintance was responsible for following up the case, Siles still learned a lot of relevant information.However, this did not affect his curiosity and surprise when he received the letter from Marina Kailan.

He returned to the living room, opened the envelope, and took out a thick stack of papers from inside.

Marina Kelan put a small envelope on top of the stack of papers and wrote "Please read this letter first" on the envelope.So Siles opened the small envelope first.

"Dear Professor Sirius Noel:

"I got your name and address from the investigators of the Church of the Past. Please forgive my presumptuousness, but I think it is necessary for me to write you a letter to tell you some stories about me.

"I thought you'd be curious about it, and that's justifying your long investigation into the whole thing. I've heard Brewer talk about you, but I didn't realize it at the time. In Brewer's After death, it is you who have been chasing the truth all this time.

"I am respected and moved by your actions. I am afraid that there are not many people of your magnanimity in this day and age. I, and my daughter - I named her Evelyn - are very lucky to be able to Met you at this time.

"I have thought about how I should write this letter to you. As you may know, I was once obsessed with theatre. My mother and grandmother, or rather, my father and grandfather, have written some well-known or unknown famous script.

"Therefore, in the past long time, I felt my life experience, and often recorded my inner monologue with paper and pen. In the past week, I spent a little time transcribing and organizing.

"In the end I decided to send you all the finished manuscripts. I heard that you are a novelist. If you don't dislike it, or if you don't find it funny that I feel sorry for myself in these manuscripts, then please Come read this monologue.

"I used to fantasize about going on stage and telling the audience what was on my mind. Perhaps you will be the only and last audience. I have made up my mind to leave all this behind, hide my name, and hide in the countryside with Evelyn.

"I have not been able to appear in front of you in a more open state, and I may not have the opportunity to see you in the future. This makes me feel a little regretful, because I would have thought about whether I should thank you in person.

"But maybe that's a good thing too. That way I don't feel embarrassed. Please treat me as a character in a fictional story, and the manuscripts are nothing more than my fictional character's babbling monologues in a script.

"...Although it is my diary-like manuscript, in the past week of sorting out, I have mixed some things I know, I have rewritten a large part of the content, and also eliminated some Overly hysterical content.

"I don't know how the investigations of those investigators are progressing. If necessary, you can inform the investigators of this information.

"However, I have told them as much as I can. What I mean by this is...Professor Noel, I trust you, so I handed over this manuscript to you. If possible, I hope you will help I will always keep this a secret.

"Evelyn is the child of Brewer Darrow. Her full name will be Evelyn Darrow Kellan. The surname Kellan was used because I wanted her to stay away from all the hustle and bustle of the past It is enough for her to be a happy Kailan.

"As for the Kellans' transvestism over the years - you probably know about that - when Evelyn grows up, she'll make up her own mind.

"Finally, I wish you all the best for the future.

"Kelan.

"By the way, I know you may refer to me to other people. If you can, please call me 'Kelan', because that's what my friends used to call me. 'Marina' is a good name. It's even unfamiliar to me.

"My sincerest greetings and best wishes to you."

The weather on this day is rare.Siles sat on the sofa in the study, the sunlight fell on his body and the papers on the table.Cindo cooks downstairs, and he says this Sunday is perfect for a big meal.

Siles finished reading the letter from Kelan—as she asked to be called—in silence, then glanced at the thick stack of papers, anticipating that this would be a long and silent reading.

He glanced at the time and realized it was nine in the morning.With dinner at eleven, he might have two hours to read Kellan's monologue.

He folded Kailan's letter and put it back in the envelope, then sorted Kailan's manuscript, and then began to read it bit by bit.

"...

"Okay, Professor, I'm sure you've finished reading that letter. Let's get started, then.

"Where does it start... from when I was born. That was 25 years ago.

"Oh, speaking of my age. I don't know if you feel this way, after the age of 20, the age is like flowing water. When I really stepped into this world, this society, I was polluted by this world-colored .So age is the least important thing.

“20岁和30岁、40岁和50岁、60岁和70岁，其实都差不多。年轻、中年、年老，人们模糊了具体的岁月，只是记得这段时间。

"My grandmother, my mother—or my grandfather, my father, but considering their biological sex, it is better to call them grandmother and mother—were born at the age of 25. had a daughter.

"The Kailan family has always been the Kailan family. What I mean by this is that the women of the Kailan family seem to be eternal, repeating the same cycle of fate, and then eventually walking on the old path of their ancestors.

"My grandmother was part of their program. It happened 50 years ago, when my mother was born.

“It was so remote, it was like watching their lives through a glass for me. My physical father died shortly after I was born — not because of their plans.

"So, in my life, it's just my grandmother and my mother.

"I was born 25 years ago. Even though my grandfather and father are dead, they're never absent. The Kellan women are good at impersonating men, which is kind of funny.

"So we are the 'three Kailans'. And the three of us Kailans finally met our own destiny.

"Growing up, I actually felt like my family was pretty normal. Of course, I didn't really experience normal family life. I mean, the shadows of the old gods seemed far away.

"Until five years ago, my grandmother and mother passed away one after another. Their legacy was enough for me to live on for the rest of my life, but at that time, they also appeared. They brought a letter in my mother's handwriting, saying that they would support me Introduce a husband.

"For whatever reason, I agreed.

"Maybe it's because it seems to bring me closer to the soul of my grandmother and mother; or maybe it's just because in this long, seemingly ordinary family life, the shadow of the old god has already enveloped my soul .

"...

"For me, Marina and Kailan are two very different identities.

"Marina has blond or brown long hair, blue eyes, beautiful appearance - I am not boasting, I am just describing my physical condition objectively - she is a woman who fits the aesthetics of this era.

"Kelan is a painter, gold-rimmed glasses, thin build, always carrying a drawing board, taciturn and reserved. Nothing masculine, but generally speaking, people are always more tolerant of the artist's gender characteristics, as if art has to be Same thing involved.

“…So one of the most important considerations for a man playing a woman or a woman playing a man is to highlight features. For example, people will notice Kailan’s gold-rimmed glasses, but they usually don’t notice that Kailan doesn’t actually have an Adam’s apple.

"Besides, when people see a man dressed like a man in men's clothes, they will only think that this is a man. They will not doubt the gender of this man because he does not have an Adam's apple, at most they will I think this man is not good in some way.

"These experiences came from my grandmother and mother.

“They were more into dressing up as men than I was and hanging out. They said it gave them another identity, a free one.

"I would say that when my grandmothers were part of that program and then gave birth to my mother, they lost themselves in a sense; they dressed up as someone else, another gender, and found, and Or deliberately filled, that lost self.

"As for me?

"I love Kailan. That's another side of me.

"(But perhaps, you'll also notice that I've always referred to another aspect of me in the third person, 'Kelan'. Perhaps you'll soon understand why.)

"...

"It all comes back to that plan.

"They call this project... 'Resurrection'. They actually don't mention the gods very much, as if the gods exist, die, and resurrect as a matter of course, all... all part of the gods, as it should be explain.

"They started this plan 200 years ago. I don't know exactly when. Sometimes when I think that I participated in the same evil plan with people 200 years ago, I can't help but feel that there is something wrong with this world. It's ridiculous.

"Time seems to be stretched, or shortened. For this world, gods are things that will not change for hundreds of thousands of years. If people want to change, it will take a longer time.

"...So, 25 years ago, when I was born, I was put on the poker table. This is a gamble. And the two sides of the gamble may be people and gods, or gods and gods death, or maybe Believers of God and others...but me, I'm the chip.

"I should be honored that these people have my humble, little life as their card table; or I should be disgusted that they have dragged me into it, expecting me to really bring them What a turning point.

"It's a horrible, sordid reality.

"...

"Then we come to that abrupt but quite appropriate topic: love.

"Before I met Brewer Darrow, I was in the dark.

"I knew how it was before he did. Before I even met him, I knew everything about him. His birth, his upbringing, his family history—oh, maybe he himself Things that I don't know, I already know.

"For example, I know that he went to middle school when he was a teenager, and then had a crush on one of his classmates. It was his first love, and it ended without a problem. After that, he seemed to be stimulated, as if he didn't mention love at all. Not interested.

"Therefore, when his family mentioned marriage, he accepted it as a matter of course, as if the boy who desperately pursued free love when he was a teenager was not him.

"I didn't want to meet him, because we weren't engaged at the time. According to the old, corrupt noble code, we shouldn't meet at that time. But Brewer Darrow was unexpectedly a revelation.

"(By the way, Professor, when Brewer Darrow became the revealer, they did feel a little panicked. So, at that time, Brewer's 'classmates' were all under surveillance. They also paid attention at this time to yours.)

"So their panic made them agree to my meeting with Brewer, as if they hoped to use this meeting to make Brewer not regret it. I don't think he will regret it. After all, he has a sense of noble family honor , this sense of honor will drive him to marry me.

"...Well, do I really know my fiancé quite well?

"Yes, I call him fiancé, because we are indeed engaged. Although... we are not married. And it is obvious to the naked eye that we cannot have a wedding. Because I killed him with my own hands.

"...

"die.

"Here, death will be tied to love. I mean, my love with Brewer.

"People may wonder why I fell in love with—like—a man I already knew so well. I even knew when he was still bedwetting, when he was still crying, and when he was still worrying about not finishing his homework.

"I seem to be a ghost, appearing in every corner of his life; or he is a ghost, a ghost that has never really appeared in my life, but does exist.

"In the five years since he turned 20, Brewer Darrow has been with me the longest, even though he doesn't know it.

"So I love him. One-sided.

"And it's kind of funny that he fell in love with me at first sight. I don't know if it's because of my looks, or because of the pollution of the gods that I carry-oh, of course I know it- anyway, he loves me too .

"I can't extravagantly expect what kind of love a person like me can get. It should be said that even though I call this emotion 'love', I don't believe that this is love in essence.

"So, when he understood the nature of the plan, when he asked me to kill to stop this terrible, evil plan, I finally said yes.

"I killed him. One stab.

"Then...they found out about it. They took something from Brewer's body and put it in me. So I got pregnant...it was weird. When I realized that I really When I was pregnant, my mind was full of: There is such a technology in this world.

"If they use this technology to develop medicine, I believe the doctors and patients in the hospital will be very happy. But in the end, they only want to use this to revive the old gods. I'm afraid even the gods will be moved by their loyalty.

"...Yes, I was mocking. But I lived in a trance during that time, and I didn't record anything. Perhaps my mental activities at that time can be described by very simple things: a straight line. Or crooked Wire.

"So I'm going back to that time now, the complete phase: meeting Brewer, realizing Brewer liked me, finding out Brewer knew the truth, killing Brewer, getting pregnant with Brewer's baby ...what a rich experience.

"In the future Evelyn may like this story, even if I don't like it very much.

"...

"Actually, after a long time, I suddenly realized a question: Where did Brewer know about this plan?

"It's impossible for them to tell him. They regard this plan as a secret, and only we, the breeders, can know part of it-yes, only part of it. As far as I know, Ramifa City is just one of the places they plan .

"I'm not sure if similar things are happening in other cities, but I do know that they also have some plans in the Land of the Ashes, as well as in more distant places. I have heard them talk about those things.

"However, I was in a trance at the time... that period of time was almost the same period from when I met Brewer to when I really realized that I should do something to save myself.

"... some things do come in hindsight.

"Life seems to go on day by day, as if nothing has changed, as if you just accepted everything that happened... Then suddenly one day, you look back at your life, only to find that you have long deviated from the original direction .

"Fate. I have to say. It's like the boat of life is swaying. When the wind pushes and the waves hit, even seabirds can rest for a while. Anything can affect this boat, but you can't do it yourself. Yes, but luckily, fate cannot be in your own hands.

"Then I struggled a bit. I wanted to struggle, at least to try. I didn't know if anyone would have noticed my struggle - it turned out there were (like you) - but I had to do something.

"—but the boat of my life is already adrift on the sea, and if I don't do something, will I just watch my boat capsize?

"Back to that question: I recalled later what happened during that period. I think the biggest possibility is that Brewer's family probably told him.

"Perhaps they thought that after the engagement ceremony, they would be able to achieve what they wanted, so they couldn't control their excitement and let Brewer know the essence of our marriage... a marriage born of death and deceit .

"I'm not sure exactly what Brewer was thinking. But when he begged me to kill him, I really thought he would love to die with me.

"... Maybe it was cowardice, maybe it was evasion. Maybe it was the cowardice and evasion of the two of us. In the end, I killed him and I survived. I gave birth to Evelyn.

"(The next few paragraphs were added a few days before this letter was sent.) It is a good thing to be alive. I sometimes think that if I did not kill Brewer then, according to their Style, Brewer will be killed by them at this time.

"Then he'll have ten more months to live. And now I'm saved. Then maybe Brewer will live too.

"...but then I realized that it was Brewer's death that made people realize what was going on, that exposed this long conspiracy. So, it was Brewer's death that saved me and Evelyn .

"It's rather contradictory, isn't it? And until now, I don't know if Brewer loves me in person, or if he just loves the beautiful Marina instead of Kay who lives in the shadows. orchid.

"...

"There's probably nothing to say about everything I've struggled with.

"I tried to do a lot, but maybe not enough. I tried to win this hand, but then realized that maybe the game itself was a trap.

"When I thought that everything in this world could be described as a game of gambling, I had already stepped on the edge of a cliff. No, no, no, the rules of this world have never been about gambling, never with my little chips to fulfill my greedy ambitions.

"There was a time when I was pretty cranky and wanted to go nuts every day. I don't know how much of it was the effect of the pregnancy, which could have affected my physical state. But I really wished the old gods had actually come through my body , and destroy the world.

"Until now, I have to admit, the thought occasionally crosses my mind. I hate the world, and that hate itself sometimes confuses me.

"Because, I hate because of that group of people, and the result of my hatred seems to make that group of people get what they want. It seems that I have also been assimilated by their evil ambitions. It seems that I was born in this world. In order to become such an evil person at this moment.

"...unbelievable, isn't it?

"I was able to slowly learn to reconcile with myself and my mental state because I was indeed saved, not trapped in that terrible environment from birth to death like my grandmother and mother were.

"When I was young, we received their attention, surveillance ... every day, every day. For a while, I had to fill out some records every day. Of course, my mother filled out the most, because she was That 'kid'.

"I record these contents now, perhaps also influenced by the habit at that time.

"But when I read these words, sometimes I feel a feeling of being out of place. It seems that the me in the past is completely different from the me now. I even feel a little confused when facing those words.

"...It seems that when I read those history books, I am also confused. Are the pasts where the gods still exist, really what happened in this world at a certain moment in the past?

"It scares me.

"When the night comes, when I say the name Marina Kellan silently, I don't even know who it refers to.

"I live in this world, empty, like a puppet, a skin. My name can't describe everything about me, whether it's Marina or Kailan.

"So I thought, Is that what the 'container' is? Is that what they've raised me to do? That kind of thought made me feel more fear and anxiety, and made me think about that crazy thought all over again.

"I live not because I want it, but because they need it.

"...

"The presence of Evelyn -- this young, immature life that had indeed escaped from a horrible, tragic past -- saved me.

"I heard that old rumor. For a moment I even felt myself mad. Children of death and the stars, and, the curse of life.

"So, at the end of the day, Evelyn's successful birth means that she has nothing to do with the old gods. She has nothing to do with those dark, horrible pasts. She is a pure and innocent child, and all the children who have been born in the past are the same.

"However, because of this, I slowly understood why they didn't go crazy and kill me after I clearly killed Brewer. Perhaps, they had an inspiration because of what I did - death is the father, isn't it?

"So, if my kids don't get them what they want, then maybe they're going to try another step: fathering the dead man. Like the disgusting things they did after Brewer died.

"I'm thankful that everything is stopped at this time. I don't know what's going to happen to those other kids, those women, those men, and I don't know what's going to happen to my future. The only thing I know is my past.

"I've been drawing countless times in Atherton Square in La Miafa, waiting for Brewer Darrow - waiting for my fiancé to leave the Historical Society, and then I follow in his footsteps.

"I saw the buildings of Lamifa City, the shadows over Lamifa City, and the ordinary and trivial things in Lamifa City. I thought about my past and fantasized about the future that I might never be able to come. In that At that time, everything was still an unknown.

"I thought about the cafe where I met Breuer. I ordered a small cake. I never ate it before, after all, I used to play Kailan more often. But that day I changed back to Marina, so I ordered a sweet and greasy cake very professionally.

"I ate slowly.

"And when Brewer asked me softly and thoughtfully if there was another one, I thought of the man I knew so well, and the man who knew nothing about me, of our possible unhappy marriage and possible unhappy offspring. , feeling downright sad and confused.

"I'm confused that my life's end is here. I'm confused that love is associated with death. Did those two gods think of love at any moment when they gave birth to that terrible monster? ?

"Then it dawned on me that there never was. After all, there has never been a god of love in this world.

"So that's when I whispered to Brewer, no, no.

"I reject this love, reject what this love touches me. I reject. I expect him to never be in my life, and I'm never in his.

"I'm counting on him to be alive, to fall in love with some young, lively woman, to marry and have a child, to grow old and fade peacefully, and to meet his own death docilely. I'm counting on him to survive, to live until this summer, to live Countless summers to come.

"And he died.

"So, Marina also died at that time. Only Kailan survived, and Brewer and Marina's child, Evelyn Kailan. There used to be three Kailans, now there are two Kailan.

"...

"This is the past and the monologue of Marina Kellan. The echoes of the past, floating in the dead soul of a man.

"Greetings to you, Professor Siles Noel, and the city of Ramifa.

"Bye now.

"Kelan."

There were two knocks on the door.

Siles suddenly came back to his senses, and subconsciously looked up.There may still be some deep emotion in his eyes, so Qin Duo paused in confusion and asked, "What's wrong with you?"

Siles was silent for a moment.

So Qin Duo sat beside him.He glanced at the manuscript in Sirius's hand, didn't look carefully, and said hesitantly, "This is a letter from Marina Kailan...?"

"Yes," said Celes. "She wants people to call her Kellan."

Qin Duo blinked, then changed his words and said, "Is this a letter from Kailan?"

Siles nodded and murmured in a low voice: "She mentioned some past stories in the letter. What troubles me is, when we learned the truth, what kind of story did we see?"

"...the conspiracy and ambition of a group of followers of the old gods?"

Siles thought for a moment and said, "A woman's love and death?"

Qin Duo looked at the stack of manuscripts with somewhat surprised eyes.

Sirius laughed at his gaze.He shook his head, then said, "Kelan plans to leave La Mifa City with Evelyn, her daughter, and live in the countryside."

"This is a good thing." Qin Duo said, "Ramifa City is probably a nightmare place for her."

Siles was silent for a moment, and finally laughed. He said, "Maybe that's right. I hope Kailan can have a new life."

"I hope she won't think about everything that happened in Ramifa City." Qin Duo said quite objectively.

Siles also agrees with this point, of course, this is only their idea, not Kelan's idea.He turned to ask: "Are you coming to ask me to eat?"

"Yes." Qin Duo kissed him affectionately, "There is already a large table of food waiting for you downstairs."

Siles smiled, and said, "Here we come." He put away the manuscripts and put them in a drawer, then took Qindo's hand, and they left the study together.

After Kailan's letter, Siles successively received follow-up and investigation results on the gambling incident from the Church of the Past, the Historical Society, and Detective Jon.

The person who appeared at 32 Lowell Street at that time—the middle-aged man was confirmed to be the current patriarch of the Graves family.He is a well-known real estate businessman, quite well-known in Ramifa City.

Even Mrs. Fuller, the businessman Ranmere, the lady, and Bertram Finn, the four acquaintances Sirius knew, had more or less contact with the real estate businessman.

For people with such status, it is naturally best to hand them over to the officials of the Principality of Const.Judging from the replies given by the Church and the Historical Society in the past, it seems that the Principality has already asked a lot of things, and they are dealing with them bit by bit, and arresting some relevant personnel.

Another impact of the Graves family's accident is that the real estate market in Ramifa City has been in turmoil recently.Of course, businessmen are naturally eyeing, intending to get a share of it.

An unexpected impact is that the renovation plan of Lamifa City can proceed smoothly because of this.

Since it is going to be remodeled, it is inevitable to do something to some buildings, not to mention the underground railway, which is destined to sacrifice some buildings.

Many of the buildings are related to the Graves family.Relying on their own financial resources, the Graves family always disagreed with the renovation plan of Lamifa City, and had to ask for a high price from the Principality of Const.

Now that the family has an accident, the renovation plan of Lamifa City is proceeding smoothly.This can be said to be a pleasant surprise.

The young couple who also showed up at 5 Lowell Street on May 23rd was a difficult problem to deal with.They are now temporarily taken away by the church of the past, and they may need to get rid of spiritual pollution later.

But whether it can actually change their lives is also a nagging question.

Siles learned from Jon only after the matter of that day was resolved that Colin Lane also came to 32 Lowell Street inexplicably that day.

And, because Colin Lane was able to reproduce the power of the evil apostle, he was able to sneak into 32 Lowell Street without anyone noticing.

It was because of the appearance of Colin Lane that Jon learned of Kailan's dystocia, and quickly reminded Siles and Qindo to let them do it in advance.

At that time, 32 Lowell Street looked very empty, with only three or four people, but in fact, it was Colin Lane who knocked down all the revelators who were squatting on the second floor in advance, so everything seemed so smooth.

...In other words, the enlightener of the third corridor can be said to have helped them a lot.

And the reason why he appeared at No. 32 Lowell Street was because Siles reminded him to be safe on that Saturday on the one hand, and on the other hand... because of the mysterious person who suddenly appeared.

the god with the black eyes