never forget [criminal investigation]

At the beginning of the Chinese lanterns, it is the time when the lights of thousands of families are lit.

People outside hurriedly walked, and more and more windows were lit.

In two hours, Xing Yue almost searched the entire community.Every unit door, every floor, and even the trash can were searched.

He shouted as he ran, and everyone passing by turned to look at him.

When I met a few aunts who came out for a walk after dinner, seeing him getting angry, I asked if I lost my child?

Xing Yue shook his head and asked them if they saw such a tall, thin young man in his early twenties wearing slippers?

The aunts all said they didn't see it, and then laughed, "Hey, I'm so grown up, I can't lose it. Maybe it's hidden and I'm playing with you."

Yes, it's hidden.Xing Yue knew that Xiang Hai hid himself again.

But why?

The temperature continued to drop, and Xing Yue's forehead was covered with sweat, and a ball of white air followed him non-stop.

He was getting more and more flustered.

Obviously a minute ago I was happily making ribs and winter melon soup, and everything is obviously developing in a better direction.

"Xiang Hai!!" He yelled aimlessly at the night again.

Suddenly, there was a rustling sound from the bushes behind him, and Xing Yue turned his head immediately.

A cihua cat jumped out with a "swish", followed by a black and white cow cat, which was even bigger, and quickly caught up with the cihuamao.The two cats grinned and wrestled for a while, then ran away one after the other.

Xing Yue suddenly remembered a place.

At the end of the community, next to the fence, there is a hidden corner surrounded by three big trees.

Because there are few people disturbing and they are not worried about disturbing the residents, some people who take care of stray animals in the community have placed some cat litters here.Avoiding the cold in autumn and winter, sheltering from wind and rain in spring and summer, and delivering cat food and clean water every day, even if the stray cats in the community have a home.

Xing Yue has never been to this place, but he has heard about it from Xiang Hai.

It was already past dinner time, and most of the cats who had eaten and drank their fill dispersed separately, and the few remaining, some rolled and some licked their paws.

Hearing the sound of hurried footsteps approaching, the cat became alert early.The timid one ran away, the bold one stared, and the ears kept turning.

A lot of leaves were knocked down by an autumn rain, but the swollen canopy gathered together to completely cover the moonlight.

It was dark under the tree, with a faint scarlet dot.

Xing Yue's footsteps stopped not far away, still gasping for breath, he called out tentatively, "Xiao Hai?"

The red lights up brightly, then dims down again.

After a long time, he finally heard the response, "Brother."

"Sorry, I messed you up again."

Xing Yue rushed over.The cats who had been watching by the side immediately jumped and ran away.

Xiang Hai leaned against the tree trunk, sitting on the wet ground and smoking a cigarette, looking extraordinarily thin.The slippers were long gone, and the clean white socks were covered with mud.

He just hid here silently, like a stray cat who doesn't fit in.

"Xiao Hai..." Xing Yue leaned over cautiously, not daring to disturb him, nor did he dare to ask why, he just squatted gently beside him, "Xiao Hai, it's so cold for you to sit on the ground like this."

Seeing that he didn't resist, he picked up one of his hands, covered the palm of his hand, and pressed it to his cheek, "Come home with me, huh?"

Xiang Hai extinguished the remaining half of the cigarette, drooping his head, resting on his knees.

"Don't want to go?" Xing Yue lowered his head, "Then I'll sit with you, when you want to go back, let's go."

After finishing speaking, he took off his coat and put it on him, "I wear so little, I must catch a cold tomorrow."

The coat carried Xing Yue's body temperature, and Xiang Hai shrank back inside.

Seeing that the danger was lifted, the cats came back silently.The bold and clingy one even leaned against Xing Yue, circling back and forth against his trousers.

Xing Yue stretched out his hand, and the cat's hot little head automatically rubbed over, purring coquettishly.

He raised the corners of his lips, "Look, Xiao Hai, I'm kind of a cat."

Only then did Xiang Hai raise his head, his eyes peeked out from under his arms, and he saw that the cat had turned up its belly, and its two front paws were raised contentedly.

"It likes you."

Xing Yue continued to tease it, "It's quite courageous, it doesn't even recognize life."

"Bolder than me." Seeing Xing Yue's fingers gently scratching the cat's belly, Xiang Hai also stretched out his hand.The cat didn't appreciate it, and ran away, "I'm still a coward."

Xing Yue grabbed his hand and stuffed it into his arms, "A timid person can't be an anti-narcotics policeman."

Feeling the "dongdong" heartbeat on the back of his hand, he got out from under Xing Yue's coat and looked at him, "Brother, what will you do if I let you down?"

Xing Yue hugged him with a smile, and kissed him on the cold forehead, "What can I do, now even my father knows that I am your daughter-in-law, so let's make do with it."

Seeing that he was silent for a long time, he asked back, "Xiao Hai, what are you going to do if I let you down?"

Xiang Hai was silent.

At this time, Xing Yue's stomach suddenly "gurgled".

Xiang Hai raised his eyes.

"Xiao Hai, let's go home. I'll cook noodles for you and add two soft-boiled eggs."

This time Xiang Hai didn't insist anymore and stood up from the ground.

Probably because he had been sitting in the cold for a long time, his legs suddenly lost strength, and his body suddenly rushed forward.

Xing Yue hastily supported him, then stuffed his two arms into the sleeves of his jacket, then put them on his shoulders, bent his knees, "Come on, I'll carry you on my back."

"No need." Xiang Hai wanted to pull him up, "I can go."

Xing Yue didn't listen to him, picked up his leg, and bumped it up, "I know you can walk, but I like to carry you on my back, okay?"

Xiang Hai didn't struggle anymore, put his arms around his neck and lay on his back.

The surroundings are very quiet, the moonlight all over the place.

After walking like this for a while, Xing Yue suddenly stopped and turned his head, "Xiao Hai, as I said, we will be tied together in the future."

Xiang Hai hesitated for a moment, then nodded, "I said so."

"I also said that even if you are in a big pit, I have to dig it out for you. If you stand on the roof and fall, you will be caught. Do you remember?"

"...Remember."

Only then did Xing Yue continue walking forward, "Just remember.

Xiang Hai tightened his arms.

After walking for a while, he stuck it to Xing Yue's ear, "Brother, after dinner, I have something to tell you."

After eating noodles, sitting around Xiang Hai's desk, both hearts were extremely disturbed.

After hesitating for a long time, Xiang Hai finally raised his head and kept pinching his fingers, "Brother, can you turn off the light?"

Xing Yue was stunned for a moment, then quickly stood up, and turned off the lamp above his head.

In the darkness, only a faint outline remained of Xiang Hai, "Brother, that Yuan Guoping is now in the No. [-] Prison, is he the warden?"

"...Yes, yes." Xing Yue never expected that he would mention this person, but then he realized that maybe this was the reason why Xiang Hai ran away suddenly.

"He was promoted from Mingzhou Prison, right?"

"Correct."

Xiang Hai paused, "My uncle also worked in Mingzhou Prison. When I returned to Dongjiang, he was the deputy head of the prison."

"..." Xing Yue's mind was a little confused, and he couldn't figure out the clue behind these words for a while.

Xiang Hai took a deep breath and began to tell his story.

"When I was ten years old, I followed my uncle to Mingzhou and lived in their house."

"There are aunts and sisters at home. They are very kind to me. They provide me with food and clothing, and contact the school to let me continue to study."

"However, at that time, my aunt was pregnant. It was probably three or four months old. It was probably the uncomfortable stage. I went and caused her a lot of trouble."

Xiang Hai's tone was quite calm, but Xing Yue's heart was hurting.He guessed that Xiang Hai's temperament of being afraid of causing trouble to others, if not born, probably formed from that time.

"Later, in winter, I still remember that my aunt gave birth to a younger brother before the final exam. The whole family was very happy, and I was also very happy."

"However, my aunt and brother are not in good health, and they stayed in the hospital for a while before returning home."

"My uncle took care of them while going to work, and also took care of my sister and me. He was very busy. Just when I started my winter vacation, I cooked for everyone every day, cleaned up the house, and helped my aunt look after the pot of decocting medicine."

"But my brother's health is still not good. Not long after, he was hospitalized again."

"It was just at the end of the year, and the work in the prison was very busy. My uncle couldn't get away, so my aunt sent my sister to her natal family, and she went to the hospital alone to take care of her younger brother."

"I'm the only one left at home. It's nothing at first. I can take care of myself. But my uncle is worried, and in the end he has no choice but to take me with him."

Xing Yue's heart skipped a beat.Although I don't know what happened later, but when it comes to this, Xiang Hai and Yuan Guoping have an intersection.

Xiang Hai paused for a long time, "I read in a corner of his office, did my homework, waited for him to get off work, and then followed him home."

"Just a few days later," Xiang Hai paused again, "Yuan Guoping came suddenly."

He touched a cigarette from the table, lit it, and continued to talk while smoking, "Uncle was very nervous when he came in, so I guess that person should be his leader. Maybe I shouldn't follow here, uncle is afraid that he will be punished." approved."

"However, Yuan Guoping didn't say anything at the time. He turned around, saw me, and asked me who I was. My uncle told him that I was his sister's child. The family was busy recently, and no one took care of me, so I had to bring him to work. "

"Yuan Guoping said, 'Every family has scriptures that are difficult to recite. If there are difficulties, the unit should take care of them. The child is very good, so you can take it with you.'"

"Uncle is relieved now, and quite happy."

"After that, Yuan Guoping came almost every day. He started talking to me, brought me a lot of snacks, and watched me do my homework."

With a cigarette in his mouth, Xiang Hai suddenly lowered his head, "He praised me for my good handwriting and my homework. He also said...that I was the most beautiful little boy he had ever seen."

After finishing speaking, Xing Yue stood up from the chair.

He went over and hugged Xiang Hai into his arms, "Stop talking, Xiao Hai, stop talking..."

At this point in the story, the ending can already be guessed.Even if it wasn't as unbearable as he thought, he didn't want to listen to it anymore.

Xiang Hai's head rubbed back and forth against his chest, then got out again, and pushed him back into the chair, "Brother, I'm fine, just let me talk. In this life, I'm afraid this is the only time left." Courage."

Xing Yue sat there again heavily, pressed out a cluster of flames, and lit a cigarette.

Xiang Hai sniffed, "It's also very unlucky. It's been a few days, and my brother's illness has not recovered. My aunt didn't recover, but now she got angry and collapsed again."

"Auntie's parents have to take care of her, sister and younger brother. They are really overwhelmed, so they urge uncle to ask for leave and come to help."

"So my uncle took a week off and was going to take me to the hospital."

"At this time, Yuan Guoping took the initiative to tell him that he could help take care of me for a while."

"He said that his daughter went abroad to study in college, and his wife was with him. He was the only one left at home. It was strange. He also said that I am very good, and I have become familiar with me these days. If uncle doesn't mind, he can help me. A few days."

"Xiaohai..." Xing Yue begged him again.

Xiang Hai still shook his head, took another puff of cigarette, "Anyway, I'll go home with Yuan Guoping."

Breathing out the smoke, he sat quietly in the darkness, gradually uncovering the worst scar on his body.

"Yuan Guoping's house is quite big. He arranged a room for me, and there are quite a lot of things in it."

"I was sitting in the house doing my homework, and he was watching TV in the living room. He came in occasionally to take a look, and brought me some fruit so that I could rest when I was tired."

"I was quite grateful to him at the time, just like my uncle, I was also very grateful to him."

"One night, when I was about to go to bed, he came in and called me, and asked me to go out and watch TV with him."

"I followed out."

After the smoke was exhausted, Xiang Hai lit another one and held it between his fingertips.

"He sat on the sofa, patted the side, and let me go over and sit next to him. I just went over."

"I can't remember what was on TV. It was a mess. I just remember that the room was very bright and the lights were on. He stroked my hair and asked me if it was hot."

"I said it's not hot."

"He just said, look at the sofa is so clean, your clothes are so dirty, it will stain the sofa."

"I just looked down at myself and thought I was quite clean."

"But he... still said I was dirty, let me take off my clothes..."

"Xiao Hai, please, stop talking." At some point, Xing Yue's tears rolled down his clothes.

Xiang Hai seemed not to have heard his words, and sank in the smoke alone, "If I don't take off, he will say that I am not good. He also said that when a child is a guest at someone else's house, he must be good and obedient, otherwise he will be very rude."

"So he took off my clothes, leaving only a pair of underwear."

Xiang Hai smoked and exhaled, recalling quietly, "He touched my hair, and then my shoulder, saying that I was clean like this."

"When it's clean, just, you can sit on his lap and watch TV."

"Xiaohai!!" In the darkness, Xing Yue's tears seemed to be broken, and the bitter taste ran down the corners of his lips and spread on the tip of his tongue.

"I was wrong, it was my fault!" He cried and begged him, "I shouldn't have made you recall this! Forget it! Please, forget it all!"

The silhouette on the opposite side shook his head lightly, "Brother, I will never forget this kind of thing."

"I'm a coward. I never have the courage to recall these things except in my dreams. You let me finish, let me be brave this time."

He continued to smoke, "Yuan Guoping hugged me and sat on his lap, and kissed me on the face again. I felt awkward and weird. Only my mother kissed me like that, not even my father. So I want to escape."

"Later," Xiang Hai's voice stopped suddenly, after a long time, "later, he changed the TV channel, turned my face away, and let me watch."

Xiang Hai's Adam's apple kept rolling back and forth, trembling his fingers, barely biting the cigarette in his mouth, "At that time, the light was very bright, very bright, shining on the TV screen, and also shining on me."

"On the screen, a man is hugging a child about my age, kiss, kiss him."

"I don't want to look, but, Yuan Guoping held me down and wouldn't let me turn my head. He also told me, look, this is normal, everyone is like this."

"But I still don't want to. I keep telling him, I don't like it, I don't like to watch it. But he still presses me and tells me that I will get used to it soon, and I will like it soon."

"He didn't let me go, so I was very angry and scared. I was afraid that I would be rude and live in someone else's house, but I would make the master unhappy."

"I didn't understand at the time..." He was talking, when he suddenly had a strong nausea and retched twice.

He shook his head, pushed Xing Yue away, and rubbed his sleeve on his face, "I didn't understand it at the time, but I figured it out when I got older. At that time, Yuan Guoping was already hardened."

He rubbed against his mouth twice again, "I wanted to run, but he caught me, dragged me back, and pressed me on the sofa."

"At that time, the overhead light was very bright, which dazzled my eyes, and the TV was very noisy, as if there were many people talking."

"Yuan Guoping lay on top of me, and then I cried, very loudly, and he let me go."

"He started coaxing me, saying that he was joking with me, that he told me to take off my old clothes because he bought me new clothes. Later, he actually gave me a new set of clothes."

Xiang Hai calmed down again, and continued to smoke, "He asked me to put on my clothes and told me that I can't tell my uncle what happened today, and I can't tell anyone else. Otherwise, my uncle will be fired, and my whole family will be shocked." hate me."

"I promised him and went to bed."

"But I kept my eyes open, staring at that door. I thought if I fell asleep, he would come in."

"Later, when he fell asleep, I got up, packed my schoolbag, and escaped from his house."

Speaking of this, Xiang Hai let out a long breath, then stood up and turned on the light.

The room suddenly lit up, and Xing Yue hurriedly wiped it on his face.

Xiang Hai sat back in the chair again, looking very tired, "You probably know what happened next."

"I ran back to my uncle's house in the dark, stuffed the tin box into my schoolbag, and took nothing else."

"I want to go home, I want to go back to Dongjiang. I want to find my mother."

"But when I got to the train station, I found out that there was no money in the box."

He sighed, "When I ran all the way back to Dongjiang in fear, I knocked on the door of my house, but I didn't know the person who opened the door."

"I asked who he was, and he asked who I was." Xiang Hai suddenly laughed out loud, "I said this was my home, but he said it was his home."

"I said I was looking for my mother, and her name was Chi Jing. The man said that Chi Jing sold him this house, and it has been more than half a year."

As Xiang Hai said, he narrowed his eyes slightly, smiled again, and swallowed his last puff of cigarette, "It's been more than half a year...I'm still stupid, waiting for her to pick me up."

Xing Yue listened blankly like an idiot, his eyes were red.She wanted to comfort him, but couldn't speak at all.

"I was very angry at the time, and I was terribly wronged." Xiang Hai's eyes darkened again, "I walked aimlessly, and finally came to the riverside."

"The river has been frozen for a long time, but someone smashed the ice for fishing, leaving many holes in the ice."

"I thought of Yuan Guoping coming again, and I felt very angry, disgusted, and dirty."

"In winter, I took off all my clothes, lay down on the edge of the ice hole, swiped the water mixed with ice scum, and washed myself from head to toe."

"I rubbed the place on my body where Yuan Guoping touched with snow, and rubbed it vigorously until it turned red and blood came out."

"I cried while washing, and then the tears froze on my face." He lowered his eyes and sniffed, "I feel that I am useless, I am so timid, I can only cry. So I vowed not to cry again gone."

"Afterwards, I started to wander around. Because I was afraid that Yuan Guoping or my uncle would find me, I chose to stay in a place where no one was around, and I didn't talk easily. Hehe, no one talked to me anyway."

"Those little hooligans call me a little dumb, and say I have a problem with my brain."

"I don't know how long I've been hanging around, but I remember that the leaves are green, and my hair is long and dirty, like a piece of garbage."

"Fortunately, I met the old director at that time, and he took me home."

"This is my story." Xiang Hai pursed his lips, raised his eyes, and looked at Xing Yue, "Later I became a policeman, and finally I met you."

The tears that Xing Yue stopped falling down again, he kept wiping his eyes, "Xiao Hai, it's my fault, it's my fault..."

Xiang Hai still shook his head, "Brother, listen to me."

"I can't forget what happened to Yuan Guoping, but I don't have to think about it. If you didn't mention this person on the phone today, I would just think he is dead."

"But another thing, I have to think about it, but I can't figure it out."

The two looked at each other, and Xiang Hai's hands were tightly clenched, "Brother, you said that you knew you were not interested in girls when you were in junior high school, and you knew that you didn't like women by nature."

"But me, I was blank at that age, I didn't know anything. I never liked girls, but I didn't like boys either. Until I liked you."

"Brother, I like you, I really like you."

"But how can I prove that I am born? Not changed by, by, by?"

Xiang Hai's voice gradually trembled, "If you are real and I am fake, what should I do?"

"what should you do?"

"what should we do?"

"Brother, I'm really scared."

can anyone help me...

After finally waiting for Xiang Hai to fall asleep, Xing Yue got up secretly, got dressed, and closed the bedroom door.

He lit a cigarette, sat in the chair that Xiang Hai usually liked to sit on on the balcony, and smoked silently.

Tonight is a disaster.

He said a few words lightly, but Xiang Hai revealed the most bloody secret in his chest.

Then what?what to do?

Say something to tie him together, say something to pull him out of the pit...

He's standing in the abyss right now and telling you he's scared.

how about you?How to pull him up?

He lives in conflict every day.Self-doubt, self-denial, and desperate persistence.Just to be worthy of your love.

What about you?But I only thought about how to sleep with him.

He didn't understand why Xiang Hai always turned off the lights, and why he sent those strange text messages.

If the two of them switched places, Xiang Hai must have understood it a long time ago.

I am simply a beast, reveling in those meaningless declarations of love every day.

He rubbed his face hard, and continued to stare out the dark window.

It stands to reason that he should hate Yuan Guoping very much now, wishing he could kill him with his own hands.But right now I really can't hate it.

The past has to be settled, but more importantly, the future.

Xiang Hai is still young and has a long way to go in life.

Scars cannot be healed, but the knot must be untied.

Xiang Hai needs help, someone to help him face himself, accept himself, and get rid of confusion.

This is not as simple as saying "don't be afraid" or "I'm with you".

A person wandering in the abyss needs not only a lamp, but also a pair of wings that can take him out of the darkness.

It's a pity that Xing Yue is not an expert in this regard, and he can't help him.

But he had to do something for Xiang Hai.

After thinking for a while, he took out his mobile phone, found the number of "Hu Guangyu", and dialed it.

The phone was picked up quickly.

"Hey, Hu, I'm sorry to disturb you so late."

The person on the other end of the phone smiled and didn't feel sleepy at all, "Hey, it's okay, you, Xing Yue, I haven't seen you in a year, and I've learned to be embarrassed."

Xing Yue forced a smile, "It's so late, why haven't you slept yet?"

"I'm on a business trip, I'm so busy, I just got back to the hotel."

"Oh, then, I'm sorry. Is it convenient for you to talk now?"

"Oh, I'll go," Hu Guangyu smacked his lips, "Xing Yue, have you been reformed or kidnapped? Hmm?"

"Can we have a good talk?"

Xing Yue didn't want to be too polite with him, and stood up from his chair, "Old Hu, I want to ask you for a favor."