The daily life of the river god

Kyuubi looked around, and pointed to his nose with some uncertainty: "You mean me?"

"You foxes all have the ability to change your appearance. You add those nine tails and you become a human. It's a bit stupid."

Kyuubi felt that she had been insulted, but she couldn't beat him, so she could only bite the bullet and turned into a six or seven-year-old child.

There are nine children who look similar to her, all wearing little red jackets and combing double ponytails, with a pair of watery eyes, and the whole person is as good-looking as red lips and white teeth.

There are ten stations in a row, and people who pass by the entrance of the farmer's market can't help but take a few more glances.

Kyuubi was accepting the admiring gazes of humans with his hips on his hips, before he heard the devil's order from beside him.

"Be ugly."

Kyuubi glared at the opponent, but he could only see half of his face, the other half was blocked by huge sunglasses!

This guy, every time he goes out and encounters a crowded place, he closes his eyes and wears sunglasses. He obviously doesn't see anything. How does he know that he looks good on purpose?

Kyuubi dared not speak out, and transformed into a somewhat ordinary-looking little girl, with the most delicate appearance.

The half-human tall child stomped his feet and looked up at the taller 虺 in dissatisfaction: "It's okay now."

The human beings transformed by the nine tails around her, because they are all controlled by her own consciousness, appear to be in a daze, which meets the requirements of stupidity.

Satisfied, he walked towards the farmer's market. There were many stalls selling vegetables, but the first-time visitors walked in one direction.

"Boss, why don't we go separately, I'll look for it from the left." Nine Tails pulled the nine dazed tail people around him, trying to disperse him.

"Need not."

From the time he stood at the door, he had already smelled the smell of dragon scales, and he could find the other party's booth even with his eyes closed.

Two non-human beings, with nine demented tailed people, walked all the way through braised chicken feet, pig's head and beef, bypassed eggs, duck eggs, goose eggs, ostrich eggs, and passed through many stalls selling spiced star anise, bananas, grapes, etc., and came to the farmer's market The corner sells ten pieces of stockings for ten yuan next to the shop.

He stood in front of the vegetable shop surrounded by the bleak business here, accompanied by the sound of "genuine killing wolf stockings, not torn or worn, only ten yuan and ten stockings that are stronger than your marriage, take them all home" .

"She didn't get good grades. I heard that you have special medicine here. I want to buy a few." He stood in front of the vendor wearing sunglasses, without any ups and downs in his tone.

The vegetable shop owner opened his cloudy eyeballs, and quickly spun around on the clothes of the adult and ten children in front of him.

Then there was a blank expression on his face, "Is Liangzi shopping for vegetables? I just cut the leeks this morning. It costs two yuan and six pounds. The scrambled eggs are delicious."

Sighing, he lowered his head and looked at Kyuubi, who had turned into a child, with those sunglasses.

"Eating more eggs can't increase her IQ. The nine generations of my family have passed it down to this generation. She has a normal brain and the rest is dementia. I want to change all this. I want her to improve her studies and get admitted to Tsinghua University and enter Antarctica." Company, show those people in my hometown who say that my family can't have a son, that women can also be extremely smart and trample the world under their feet."

The non-human who was wearing huge sunglasses that made it difficult to see his face calmly grabbed a handful of pea shoots and put them in the weighing pan, then said: "Here are two catties of leeks. For these children, you see, I have been tempered by life. Facial paralysis and blindness."

Nine Tails was numb, she didn't expect that in order to get the dragon scale, he would be so shameless.

The vegetable vendor didn't expect this eccentric person to have such a miserable life experience. At the same time, he strongly resonated with what he said just now, and his cloudy eyes flashed with emotion: "Your daughter looks very smart. Yes, the people in those hometowns are all ignorant, women can hold up half the sky."

"Wait until she becomes a woman to hold up half the sky, and I am half buried in the loess, can I hold up the sky before she becomes a woman? Boss, tell me how much it is. If it is not enough, I can sell my kidney. I have it." The phone number for the kidney." He made a gesture and took out the mobile phone from his pocket, and called the boss who bought the kidney on the spot.

"Don't, don't, brother, don't be so impulsive. I told you that without you, why wouldn't you believe me! I really don't know what you want to buy." The boss selling leeks wanted to test the other party again.

"Dad, will Jiang Jiujiu lie to us? He didn't try to become smart here at all." Jiuwei tilted his head, stuffed a thumb into his mouth, and said in a dissatisfied tone while biting: "I'll be back later. I will go to the second building to find him to settle accounts!"

The leek vendor heard the conversation between their father and daughter, and smiled, "Are you from the Nanhua community? The housing prices in that community are very expensive."

She has seen the child named Jiang Jiujiu before, and was brought by his mother to buy vegetables several times. Every time, his mother asked Jiang Jiujiu to calculate how much each dish cost per catty. How much change.

As long as the kid doesn't answer within a few seconds, the person can just hit the son right in her booth.

What a pity, she gave away a copy of the special medicine because she saw that the child was pitiful.

"When my daughter holds up half the sky, we will be able to afford even the most expensive house." Living beside the Smelly Water River, a non-human with an area of ​​[-] square meters lived, and said brazenly.

The peddler looked at the nine dumb children beside this man, and then at the only Nine Tails who spoke with a witty brow, curled his lips in disgust.

I thought to myself that with your genes, I probably couldn’t afford a bigger house.

But if this person is Jiang Jiujiu.There is really nothing to doubt about the one introduced by Yu Yan's family.

The vegetable vendor readily took out a white foam box from under the vegetable stall, looked around mysteriously to make sure no one noticed them, and quickly took out something from the box.

"Little girl, stretch out your hand."

Kyuubi stretched out his right hand, the vegetable vendor still had black mud in his nails, he grabbed Kyuubi's palm and "snapped."

"Hiss!" Nine Tails quickly retracted his palm and took a closer look.

In the center of his right hand, there are three dark red things.

"After you go home, don't touch the water for 24 hours. You may have symptoms of cold and allergies in the past two days. It's normal, and it will start to improve your IQ after a week." The vegetable vendor opened the foam box with a gap and put it back. go back.

"There is no charge for this. I am also a poor parent. If children are not smart, adults will suffer."

The words were affectionate and righteous, and with closed eyes, he picked up the pea sprouts indifferently: "How much are these leeks, we bought them all."

This is the second time the vegetable vendor has seen him holding up pea shoots and shouting for leeks. The corners of his mouth twitched and he picked up a handful of real leeks and handed them to the other party, "Five yuan, I'll pack them for you."

"These children have poor IQs. I don't ask them to hold up half the sky in the future. I just hope that they can live a normal life. Give me another nine shares of that thing."

Under the control of Nine Tails, the nine tail people with poor IQ collectively looked up at the vegetable vendor, perfectly expressing their lack of IQ.

Vegetable vendor: "..."

Half an hour later, the eleven people who came out of the farmer's market finally came out from the surrounding smell of vegetables, fish, meat and fresh shrimp, and smelled the fresh car exhaust outside.

Nine Tails looked at the dark red dragon scales in his palm, and his happy tail almost flew up.

"Boss, we got so many dragon scales in one go, what should we do next?"

He closed his eyes and said expressionlessly: "Turn into ten boys again, let's change our identities and ask for it again."

It's all here, if you can't finish it all at once, change your identity and come again.

In the small foreign building, Lu Wenren greeted many brothers to sit in the hall, and those who couldn't sit down stood up.

Luzhai went up to the second floor, took a look at his youngest son's bedroom, and was quite satisfied with the huge bathroom.

"This non-human has good taste, son, you really know how to find a place." Luzhai looked at the two-meter-large bed again, then turned to ask Lu Wenren, "Three hundred, tell Dad, you didn't threaten non-humans with force, did you? "

Although his son is not this kind of person, seeing such good accommodation conditions in Luzhai, he still asked a question as a precaution in the future.

"I'm not an evil non-human, and of course I won't threaten others."

Lu Wenren was quite sure.

He couldn't tell at all that he transformed a bed for that non-human just yesterday, so that he could get rid of the pitiful appearance that he could only sit in the small garden and sleep.

"Our three hundred is really good, let's take a walk around your river with dad." Luzhai boasted that his son didn't even need to write drafts, and Rainbow said one sentence after another. Facing the river full of all kinds of garbage not far from the door, he could Kua River is so wide that it can put so many things down.

Facing the dilapidated river temple, it can also be said that the wood is quite strong, and it has not rotted after being thrown in the water for a hundred years. The temple welcomes a new god again.

The new river god, who had just taken office for less than a week, began to feel overwhelmed by this kind of praise. When he looked at this garbage-filled river, he felt that the future was bright and worth looking forward to.

In the farmer's market, the vegetable vendors selling leeks are also a little bit fluttering now.

Standing in her booth was an adult male who was exactly the same as the paralyzed and blind man just now.

The difference is that the ten little girls standing beside the other party have now become ten little boys.

"Don't hide it, I'm the nephew of the third cousin of that man's second uncle's family just now, I heard all your conversations, I will never allow anyone in our village to be smarter than my son, give me your medicine One serving!" Standing in front of the booth, after sticking to read all the content, he grabbed two white radishes and put them on the weighing pan: "Two more pig's trotters, to supplement my son's brain."

Kyuubi, who stood aside and turned into a little boy, smiled innocently and looked up at the scorpion: "Dad, what you just took was not pig's trotters but ginseng."

"Ginseng? I already bought ginseng for you with all the money at home. I only have 200 yuan on me now. Let's eat pig's trotters." He took out the white radish from the weighing pan and replaced it with two bitter gourds.

The vegetable vendor was stunned for a while, and finally took a deep breath, and looked at the crazy father and son in front of him with righteous words: "Hurry up, hurry up, if you don't leave, I will call the police. Where can a lunatic come out?"

This person is very abnormal at first glance, she will give the medicine to him.

Not getting the medicine again, Jin sighed and raised his hand to rub Kyuubi's transformed short hair.

"I'm not crazy. My family has been passed down from nine generations to this generation. There is only such a normal son. Ever since my third cousin's second uncle's second uncle's old uncle gave birth to a daughter, I wanted to marry his family. One girl is just right for ten sons in my family.

But I didn't expect him to want his daughter to stand on my son's head!Even if I agree to this behavior of undermining the dignity of men, my ancestors would not agree.

You give me the medicine, from now on this matter is only known to you and me. Eighteen years later my son will get married, and I will treat you to a wedding wine. "

Speaking of this, the young man wearing huge sunglasses sneered: "Otherwise, I will call the police now and say that you are selling fake medicines here, and I have taken pictures of all the transactions you just had with that guy, dog, mobile phone. "

Kyuubi took out his mobile phone speechlessly, opened the photo album and randomly selected a video, raised it up and pointed at the vegetable vendor's face and shook it: "Auntie, we all took pictures."

"Call the police, call the police! I sell shit medicine! You go and call the police to arrest me! I didn't sell anything, and I didn't charge any money for the things, and they were all given away for free! Hurry up and call the police. If you don't call the police, I will help you. Call the police!"

The vegetable vendor was very angry. This thing was taken care of by a kind-hearted person who helped her family in the past. He said that if he met such a sad-faced parent, he would give it to him for free. Really, if you don’t believe it, there is nothing. She hasn’t sold it for a penny since she got it. At most, those people bought her leeks an extra two catties after getting it.

She still didn't believe that the police could arrest her with this thing.

The two people who came to cheat Longlin didn't expect that their poor acting skills would make the vegetable vendor go berserk.

After the vegetable vendor's call to the police was made, the two non-humans quickly fled the scene and stood outside the farmer's market to reflect on the problem.

"For the first time, she looked very good at talking." The face changed in less than 5 minutes, human beings are so fickle.

"Stop acting. Let's go in and grab it. I've memorized where the box is." Nine Tails picked up his sleeve, intending to grab it.

"No, go back and see what those dragons have in mind."

With a big wave of his hand, he decided to let the human go. It would be good for them to come after they learned about Jiaolong's plan.

Kyuubi heard that he didn't do anything anymore, so he took the Nine Tails back in a daze, and ran after him all the way: "Should we leave this person alone? She doesn't seem to know that those dragon scales will poison humans Assimilated into the appearance of a monster."

"If you are greedy and want to gain power by going sideways, you must be ready to admit all costs."

The two non-human beings returned to the small western-style building next to the old stone bridge, and Jiuwei went to work in the neighborhood committee as usual, and separated from the 虺 on the way.

Hui returned to his small western-style building alone, standing at the gate of the courtyard and pushing the door to enter the non-human.

Standing in the yard wearing huge sunglasses, looking at the pearl crystal coral aquatic plants all over the ground.

Silently retreating the foot that was stepping into the courtyard, she stepped back all the way to the courtyard gate, looking up at the house number on the small western-style building.

No. [-] in one street and one alley.

That's right.

This is the house he lived in for 25 years.

The author has something to say:

Kyuubi: No one knows what I went through today.