half blind

"Get out." Zhang Qing said in the silence where a needle could be heard falling on the ground.

"But……"

"Get out." Zhang Qing repeated again, this time his voice was a little trembling, "Get out! Get out!"

"Your eyes—" Zhou Nanchen still insisted.

"I'm fucking telling you to get out, are you deaf?" Zhang Qing roared loudly, even he didn't know why he lost control all of a sudden, "Get out!"

"What are you still doing here? Get lost!"

Zhou Nanchen still didn't say anything, just pursed his lips tightly, and a trace of pain flashed in his eyes.Then turned and walked out before the farce caused more riots.

fuck you.

If I tell you to go, you just leave. If I tell you to jump off the cliff, do you want to jump off the cliff too?

Zhang Qing buried his face in the palms of his hands, couldn't bear it anymore, and sobbed loudly.

Yin Ling finally found Zhang Qing on the curb.The boy with messy hair and messy clothes sat on the edge of the curb with his head buried in his knees.

Yin Ling seriously suspected that even if paparazzi passed by at this time, they would not be able to recognize him. His downcast appearance looked like a migrant worker who did not ask for a salary.

"Qingqing." Yin Ling patted his arm, "Hey, Zhang Qing!"

Zhang Qing's reaction was very slow, and he raised his head slowly after a few seconds, "Ah."

Yin Ling didn't know whether to laugh or cry, "What's the matter? Why do you look so lost. Come on, stand up first."

Zhang Qing was sluggish for several seconds before he nodded, trying to stand up while supporting the ground.But his legs and feet seemed to be particularly weak, and he staggered a bit when he got up.

"Oh, my God." Yin Ling quickly reached out to support him, "Are you okay?"

Zhang Qing couldn't even speak, so he could only wave his hands.

When Yin Ling received Zhang Qing's call, she was still at KTV.Zhang Qing talked a lot on the other end of the phone, rambling with a mute voice, but she didn't hear a word clearly.

"What did you say?" Yin Ling walked out of the box and put the phone on her ear.

After being silent for a while, Zhang Qing finally said, "Can you come and pick me up?"

Zhang Qing's address to Yin Ling was also vague, why there was a red light here and a sign over there, and he was in the middle of the red light and the sign.As a result, Yin Ling searched around for several times, and the driver's eyes were dizzy.

Yin Ling put Zhang Qing's arms on her shoulders to support him, and helped him walk a little bit towards the direction of the car, complaining as she walked, "How much have you been drinking? My old lady is not as drunk as you after drinking all night." I warn you, don't spit in my car."

Zhang Qing didn't utter a word, and exerted a little force on his feet, making it easier for Yin Ling to support him.If he was really drunk, with Yin Ling's small body, even an arm couldn't drag him.

I think Zhou Nanchen carried him back to the dormitory when he was drunk.

Yin Ling stuffed him into the back seat of the car, looked at him and wanted to say something, but then glanced at the driver again, "Can you go to my place?"

Zhang Qing didn't speak, but nodded.

Yin Ling's family seems to have real estate everywhere, and they are all villas.

The car finally stopped in front of a small villa with a courtyard in the outer ring. Yin Ling jumped down and helped him out, without asking any questions during this period.

Although this girl is often crazy, her mind is frighteningly subtle at critical moments.He didn't ask him what happened, let alone where Zhou Nanchen went, which made Zhang Qing very grateful.

"You're still blind, just running around!" Finally entering the house, Yin Ling let out a long sigh of relief, threw Zhang Qing on the sofa, and went to change his shoes, "You can't see how to call me ah?"

Zhang Qing stared at Yin Ling's blurred shadow for a while, then took out the mobile phone from his pocket, "Xiao i, Xiao i."

An electronic female voice came from the phone, "I'm here."

"Call Miss Yin."

"Got it, I'm dialing 'Miss Yin'."

The mobile phone in Yin Ling's bag rang, and she was taken aback, "Damn, there is still this kind of operation."

"Technology changes life." Zhang Qing said, hung up the phone, and put the phone back.

Yin Ling sighed and asked, "Do you want something to eat?"

Zhang Qing shook his head.Don't say that he just ate, even if he didn't eat, he couldn't eat.

"Then you drink some water? I'll ask my aunt to make you some coffee or tea..."

"It doesn't need to be so troublesome, just boiled water will do."

"It's not numb..."

"Plain water." Zhang Qing insisted.

"Okay." Yin Ling didn't bother to argue with him, and got up to find his aunt.

Not long after, someone brought a glass of warm boiled water and put it in front of Zhang Qing. Zhang Qing picked it up and took a sip before putting it down.No one spoke for a while.

The lights in Yin Ling's villa were brightly turned on. It was still broad daylight, but the house was brightly lit, which made Zhang Qing feel a little dazzling.

Yin Ling cleared her throat, as if she wanted to say something to break the silence.But Zhang Qing started talking ahead of her.

"I can not do it."

Yin Ling froze for a moment, but did not speak.

"I thought..." Zhang Qing stretched out his hand and rubbed his face fiercely, "But I still can't do it."

"Qingqing..." Yin Ling sat down beside Zhang Qing in distress, and touched the back of his hand.

"Forget it, really, I'm tired." Zhang Qing's tone showed exhaustion, "I really don't want to fight with what happened six or seven years ago, I'm already tired enough."

"Take a rest when you're tired. There's a bed upstairs, and I'll take you there." Yin Ling stood up immediately, but Zhang Qing didn't intend to move at all.

"No need, you've been playing outside all day, go to sleep, don't worry about me, I'll make a call." Zhang Qing lowered his head, took out his phone, cleared his throat, "Xiaoi Xiaoi, call Duan ..."

Sometimes Zhang Qing felt that Yin Ling's physique was incredible.Not like a girl, not like a human being at all.

For example, now, after dancing all night and eating, drinking and having fun all morning, Yin Ling was able to snatch his mobile phone right before he finished saying "Duanmu Rou".

Zhang Qing thinks that this is no longer a problem of drinking well, it is simply that he is completely immune to alcohol and does not need to sleep at all.

"What are you doing?" Zhang Qing frowned.

"What are you doing?" Yin Ling asked back.

"I can't even call my manager?" Zhang Qing got angry and reached out to her, "Give it to me."

"What did you call her for?" Yin Ling didn't move at all, staring at him.

"What the hell can I say!" Zhang Qing raised his voice angrily, "Say I can't live with my fucking first boyfriend, and ask her to report to the company!"

Yin Ling glared at him, "Then what about the new drama that you have signed a contract for? The filming will start next week!"

"I'm not acting anymore!" Zhang Qing also stared at Yin Ling, and the volume was turned up a bit, "Didn't you say that? Let me stay away from him, let me stop acting! I'm not acting now, I quit, Isn’t that okay? I’ll just obediently live in a mental hospital, behave obediently as a lunatic, and play bullshit...!"

Before Zhang Qing finished his last word, he suddenly felt his face wet, and the liquid dripped down his chin.He was stunned for three full seconds before he realized that it was Yin Ling who picked up the water glass on the table with his backhand and poured half of the water on his face without any hesitation.

"Damn it." After a few seconds, he said softly, "I really don't need you to wash the sofa cushions."

"Zhang Shuiqing, don't keep on fucking with me!" Yin Ling became angry, full of momentum, "You have the ability to scold in front of your old friend? What's the matter with throwing all the fire on me? ?”

Zhang Qing stopped talking, his eyes were sore and astringent, he quickly stretched out a hand to cover his eyes, but tears still slipped through his fingers.

"Fuck." Zhang Qing's voice was a little hoarse, and he repeated after a while, "Fuck."

Yin Ling didn't speak anymore, Zhang Qing judged from the sound of her footsteps that she had walked out of the living room.

For a moment Zhang Qing felt even more uncomfortable, and almost cried out, but still gritted his teeth and endured it, letting the tears flow silently.

But not long after, Yin Ling came back and threw something in front of Zhang Qing.Zhang Qing reached out and touched it, oh, it was a tissue.

"Thank you." Zhang Qing took out a piece of paper and cleaned himself up, only then did he feel guilty, "I'm sorry."

"Forget it, my lord has a lot, I forgive you today." Yin Ling finally sighed, "Aren't you going to talk about it?"

Zhang Qing was silent and did not speak.

Yin Ling gave up after waiting for a while, and switched to another important point, "Are you really planning to call Duanmurou and ask her to tell the company about your illness?"

"En." Zhang Qing didn't evade this, and responded.

"You were so reluctant before and never considered this option. Why did you suddenly give up now?" Yin Ling asked, "Didn't you always value resources more than anything else? If you tell the company, you will lose more than that. It's this drama. Who knows how long it will take to cure your strange disease, if you fade out of the audience's sight for a long time, with your current position, when you come back..."

Yin Ling didn't finish her sentence, but Zhang Qing understood what she meant.In fact, there is no need to tell him these words at all, how could he not understand.

Artists need to keep appearing, constantly refresh their sense of existence in front of the audience, and keep staying in the public eye through various hype and marketing.

Because the competition in the circle is too fierce, even if you fade out for a week, your fans may forget about you.

So Zhang Qing actually didn't like occasions where he had to face fans. Those noisy voices, exaggerated solidarity, and even heart-piercing shouts all carried a trace of falsehood that they couldn't perceive.

Fans just need someone, a perfect, handsome Mr. Nice Guy to carry all their fantasies, and it doesn't have to be him, he just happens to be that guy.

"I don't know what to do." Zhang Qing said, and then realized that his voice was a little hoarse, and cleared his throat, "I use my eyes to memorize the script, talk to people with my eyes, take positions and shoot everything. eyes, but all I can see is him. I don't know what's wrong with me, I really don't want to see him at all, I wish I couldn't see him from all my field of vision."

"When I look at him once, a small piece of my heart will be broken. Once I look at him, my heart will ache. For the past seven years, it's okay to forget about it, but as long as I remember his name once in my head—Zhou Nanchen , the three words Zhou Nanchen, I feel like someone has skinned me from the inside out." Zhang Qing turned to look at Yin Ling, "Do you understand this feeling?"

Yin Ling sighed, and honestly shook her head, "I don't understand. I've never liked someone so deeply."

"That's right, you are Miss Yin from the Playing World." Zhang Qing stretched out his hand to pick up the water glass in front of him, and then remembered that the glass of water had already poured all over his head, so he had to put it down.

"But I... can understand a little bit. There are some things that time can't kill." Yin Ling said, "Some things you know from the moment they happen, you can't escape in this life, and you can never forget them Even if many, many years later, you can't even remember the whole story of this incident, the feeling at that time will still remain, and will be with you forever."

Zhang Qing looked at Yin Ling in surprise, and was a little surprised that Miss Yin could say such a thing.But Yin Ling quickly held his hand and said, "Don't call Sister Rou, okay?"

Zhang Qing sighed, "Yes."

"Go to sleep, we'll talk about it when we get up." Yin Ling stood up from the sofa and yawned a lot, Zhang Qing felt sleepy all along.

Yin Ling held his arm with one hand and pushed his back with the other, and escorted him upstairs in a posture similar to that of a prisoner, and escorted him to a room that smelled new.

"You can sleep here, Auntie has already spread the quilt for you, just go to sleep."

Zhang Qing lay down on the bed, and the quilt was really fluffy and soft, as if he had never slept on it once.

"What is your house for? Has no one ever lived there?" Zhang Qing asked.

"Well, it was prepared for cats before." Yin Ling smiled happily.

"Damn?" Zhang Qing sat up in shock.

Yin Ling burst into laughter and escaped, "Good afternoon!"

It took 5 minutes for Yin Ling to go out before Zhang Qing suddenly remembered, didn't Yin Ling never keep cats?

Zhang Qing thought that he would not be able to fall asleep if he changed to an unfamiliar environment continuously for the past two days, but he fell asleep almost as soon as he touched the pillow.

He didn't sleep well at Zhou Nanchen's house yesterday. He had too many messy thoughts, and he was still listening to music, so he was much sleepier than he thought. He actually slept from noon to dinner like this.

As soon as Zhang Qing came out of the room yawning, he heard Yin Ling's voice.

"Hey, are you up? You're sleeping like a pig."

"Hey, I'm so sleepy." Zhang Qing rubbed his eyes, "Where are you?"

"Take two steps forward, and the stairs are on the right."

Zhang Qing took two steps forward, then froze for a while.

"The hand you eat and hold the chopsticks." Yin Ling said very patiently, "It's the right hand."

"Oh." Zhang Qing stretched out his hand in embarrassment, touched the handrail of the stairs, and then walked down slowly.

Yin Ling was sitting on the sofa in the lobby on the first floor, reading with something in his hand, Zhang Qing could hear the sound of pages turning.

"What time is it?" Zhang Qing yawned.

"05:30, don't worry, you haven't had dinner yet." Yin Ling mocked, "I'm not as sleepy as you all night."

"Can I compare with you? You are the Goddess of Immortality." Zhang Qing sat down on the sofa and saw something in the fruit plate on the sofa. "What is this?"

"food."

Zhang Qing took a piece and put it in his mouth, the sweet taste spread, it was crispy candy.

Apart from a bit of pain in his head and buzzing in his ears, he feels pretty good right now.

Calm down and wake up a little bit.Although he was splashed with water, something was indeed vented out along with the fire.

Zhang Qing was glad that he insisted on ordering a cup of boiled water instead of tea and coffee.

"What are you looking at?" Zhang Qing turned his head.

"The script." Yin Ling said, "Anyway, I'm idle, so I'll read it as a novel first."

Zhang Qing's heart twitched, and he lowered his head and stuffed another piece of crispy candy into his mouth, "Oh."

"How do you feel?" Yin Ling glanced at him.

"It's fine. My head still hurts a little. Maybe it's because I've slept for too long. I'm fine with everything else." Zhang Qing pressed his temple.

"Calm down?"

"Yeah." Zhang Qing replied depressedly.

"Then what are you going to do about this?" Yin Ling asked.

Zhang Qing didn't speak, and threw another piece of candy into his mouth and chewed it.

"I just don't want you to make a decision as soon as your brain is hot." Yin Ling said with some worry, "You have worked hard for two years to finally get to where you are today. If you say give up, you will give up..."

"I don't want to give up." Zhang Qing said quickly, frowning, "I just...don't know what to do."

Yin Ling was silent for a while, and put the script aside, "Hey, have you ever thought that there might be a reason why he left you back then?"

"I've thought about it." Zhang Qing said, "I've thought about it many times. Anyway, over the years, all kinds of excuses have been found for him. But only now do I feel that these are not important."

"unimportant?"

"Well." Zhang Qing unexpectedly found that he was very calm when he said this, "It doesn't matter whether he had a reason or no reason back then, or what reason he had. No matter how legitimate the reason he said, we The gap between them will not just disappear. These seven years have passed, and nothing can make up for it."

Once many things are lost, they can never be taken back.

He grabbed another halva and put it in his mouth.

"That's also—hey." Just as Yin Ling started to speak, he was interrupted by the sound of the doorbell, and both of them froze for a moment.

"Could it be your group of friends?" Zhang Qing smiled, "Is it still not enough to pull you all night?"

"A group of drinking and meat friends, can you still know my home address?" Yin Ling stood up and shouted at the aunt who was already walking towards the door, "Let me go!"

Zhang Qing couldn't see Yin Ling's movements clearly, but he guessed that Yin Ling glanced at the monitoring screen at the door, because she quickly said "Fuck" softly.

Zhang Qing immediately jumped up from the sofa, "Who is it?"

"Ah, yes..." Yin Ling stuttered and didn't say a name for a long time.

"Who is it?" Zhang Qing asked again.

Yin Ling sighed, "If you don't want to open the door for him, I won't open it."

Zhang Qing didn't speak, the doorbell rang again.Suddenly, a second seemed as long as a minute.

"Go ahead." Zhang Qing took a deep breath.