East Berlin's June Boat Song

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After crying all night, I decided to accept my fate.

regret?If it doesn't exist, I will never regret it.

The only thing I regret is that I didn't kill him.

Thinking of the moment when I shot, I really didn’t hesitate at all. This must be the Lord’s instruction, and I was destined to take that step.

I huddled on the barbed wire bed with a thin quilt, and looked at the empty cell.All around are flat and smooth gray concrete walls that seem to be able to swallow all life. The white light in the corridor seeps in from the iron window on the prison door. Dust floats in the light beam, disturbing the light like a mayfly creature. .In the corner on the other side, there is a fairly clean toilet and washbasin, but the white porcelain surface is covered with mottled rust, like malignant sores from syphilis.

I stared blankly at that beam of light for an hour, two hours...

One day passed, and I felt like I was going crazy, but the physical pain subsided and awakened the instinctive hunger and thirst. I got up tremblingly, walked to the sink, and turned on the faucet.

I washed my face with ice-cold water, I became much more awake, and then gulped down a few sips. The coldness instantly stung my empty stomach, causing it to convulse.

I covered my belly and squatted down, moaning in pain. At this moment, a small window at the bottom of the cell door opened, and a small iron plate was pushed in.

On the plate was a cup of steaming milk and a piece of brown bread with grains.

I staggered and rushed over, grabbed the bread and devoured it. I almost choked on it too quickly, and took a sip of milk in a panic to avoid the danger of my esophagus being blocked.

Rhine is really in a mess...

After eating, I curled up on the iron frame bed and fell asleep in a daze. In such a place, time seemed to pass very slowly. Eat to judge whether you have ushered in a new day.

Every day is a piece of black bread and a cup of hot milk. When I eat it for the tenth time, there is a small piece of smoked sausage on the iron plate.

I have never felt that smoked sausage is so delicious, tasting the salty taste, I almost moved to tears.

One day, when I was wondering whether I would spend my whole life in this small cell, there was a sound of unlocking the cell door.My heart was beating wildly in an instant. Could it be that I was going to be dragged out for execution or exiled to the Gulag Prison... After thinking about it, there were only two possibilities, and I buried my head in my knees.

After the door opened, he walked in.

Major General Julian Azrael, a ruthless Slavic beauty.

He stood in front of him with his hands behind his back, just staring at me without saying a word just like last time.

I opened the corners of my mouth and smiled. I haven't spoken for a long time. When I opened my mouth, my voice was as hoarse and ugly as a broken violin.

"Will you kill me?"

I looked straight into his eyes without any fear or trembling. After experiencing the initial fear for more than ten days, I have accepted my fate frankly.

He raised the corners of his mouth, his bright red lips gracefully opened on his milk-white teeth, his voice was so gentle that it almost made my bones crumble.

"Do you want to die?"

God, how could this man say such vicious things in such a gentle voice? !

"Of course not." I said truthfully, "I haven't lived enough."

He raised his eyebrows slightly, and this subtle expression made him look much more vivid.

"I can't see it." He approached me: "I thought you were tired of life."

I was dumbfounded, and then glared at him bitterly. He bent down and was about to reach out his hand to me who was sitting on the bed, but he stopped his movement suddenly, and two beautiful eyebrows flocked to the center of his brows.

He straightened up quickly and took two steps back.

"You have a taste, Rhine."

He looked at me from a distance, said this out of nowhere, and made no secret of his dislike for me.

I was locked up here for half a month, eating and drinking in this small space of ten square meters, no clothes to change, no shower facilities, everyone will have a taste, okay?

I think I must be very ugly with an unshaven beard now, but so what, when a person is about to die, can he still take care of his image?

So the bold and reckless Rhine suddenly felt an unreasonable courage in his heart, and he suddenly felt that he might have some fun before he died or was exiled.

The corners of my mouth turned up in a smug smile, and I stood up from the bed.I grabbed my clothes and smelled it, and sure enough, the smell was very strong.

He stood far away and began to frown, not understanding what I was going to do.I looked at him and pretended to be innocent: "Is it really smelly?"

"Hmm." He nodded.

"But you didn't give me a bath."

I rushed forward, just wanting to give him a big hug, to rub all the sweat and dirt on my body on his clean military uniform, and I really wanted to rub his proud face, Put all my saliva on his face and lips, don't you think I'm dirty?I'm sick of you now!

However, I just ran up two steps, and before I could touch him, I was kicked out and hit the metal frame bed hard.I let out a scream, covered my abdomen and gasped for breath. Cold sweat broke out instantly, and I bowed like a dying shrimp.

I think the ribs must be broken, otherwise why would it hurt so much, I sneaked a glance at him while hissing and panting, this man was actually smiling again, and he was a bit smug.I was so unlucky that I didn't succeed in anything, not even disgusting him.

The so-called revenge is just playing with himself.

Thinking of this, I couldn't stop crying, sobbing and crying.After a long time, I heard him say: "You are really a weirdo."

He opened the cell door and walked out, and I spat at him bitterly!wack!It's not all because of you that I became like this! !

Not long after he left, a group of people who looked like doctors arrived, chattering Russian without understanding a word.After forcing me to give me a sedative, I fell asleep.When I woke up again, there was a pleasant smell of fir trees floating around.

Pulling myself up, I found that my cell had changed.The toilet and washbasin were wiped to shine white, and the concrete floor was also mopped very clean. The quilt on my bed was spotless and soft to the touch.And myself, actually put on a brand new prison uniform.

I noticed an extra mirror on the wall above the sink, so I walked over and looked at myself in the mirror.

Although my eyes are sunken and I look tired, my light brown hair is no longer frizzed like a bird's nest, it has been neatly trimmed, the sweat stains and dirt on my face and neck have been washed away, and my fair skin glows in a warm yellow Glossy underneath.

warm yellow...light...

I turned around suddenly, and found that there was an extra set of walnut tables and chairs against the wall, and there was a desk lamp with a warm yellow light on the table.

What is this for?It seems that I want to live here for a long time.Am I not condemned to death?Or, out of exile?

Just as he was wondering, the cell door opened and he walked in again.This time he didn't look at me, but looked around for a while, and then he set his eyes on me with a dull face.

"It's clean." He seemed quite satisfied, then he took out a book with a brown cover from behind him and put it on the table.

What does this person want to do?

I stared at him, my eyes seemed to dig a piece of meat off him.But he didn't care at all, he was still calm and looked at me from above.

He really lives up to his name, Julian, what a proud Roman emperor.

I smiled mockingly and asked, "What exactly do you want?"

He rolled his blue eyes: "Can't you see?"

"I just see that you're imprisoning me."

"Shouldn't it be?"

I was dumbfounded, attacking a senior Soviet military officer in the street, probably not enough to die ten times.But I spent more than half a month here well, so it seems to be kind to me.

But this femme fatale is definitely not that kind. I looked at him warily and asked suspiciously, "You don't want to experiment with me, do you?"

He chuckled: "Do you think everyone is as perverted as you Germans?"

I……

I was speechless, and even lowered my head in shame.

"You've changed a lot." He said suddenly.

I looked up at him: "I don't think you know me before."

He looked directly at me, his eyes were so captivating: "I'm talking about appearance, Rhine."

I was taken aback and pursed my lips tightly. After six years, I have become a real man.But, why does this person call "Rhein" so smoothly that it makes people feel numb after hearing it.

"Why didn't you answer me?" He said meaningfully.

"Answer what?" I shrugged. "People will grow up eventually, isn't it normal?"

He nodded and said, "It looks better."

I didn't expect him to say that, and I suddenly felt my cheeks burning.He reached out and tapped the corner of the table, such a simple movement was so graceful that it was outrageous. Although the curved index finger was wrapped under the glove, I could still imagine the wonderful arc and sharp joints.

He pointed to the book and said, "Before I come next time, read it."

"Oh, why?" I asked in surprise.

He glanced at me lightly, without any superfluous expression, his piercing eyes seemed to tell me that this was not some kind of request that could be asked, but an order that could never be disobeyed.

I was overwhelmed by his powerful aura and lowered my head in embarrassment. After he left, I came to the table and saw a line of beautiful bronzing fonts shining golden light under the warm yellow light of the desk lamp.

"Pushkin Poems"...

I almost vomited blood, asking a street ruffian like me who didn't finish school to read the poems of the great writer Pushkin, what the hell is this guy trying to do... Fortunately, I turned a few pages and they were all in German. It seems that this general is really caring , is that this book is specially prepared for me.

I let out a long sigh, sat down, opened a page at random, and read in a low voice.

*"Did you ever hear the singing in the woods at the end of the night,*

*A singer is telling about love and sadness? *

*The fields are quiet in the early morning hours,*

*The sound of the reed flute is simple and resentful,*

*have you ever heard*

*Did you ever see him, in the dark forest,*

*A singer is telling about love and sadness*

*Did you ever see his tears, his smile,*

*He is full of sorrow, his eyes are dim,*

*Have you ever noticed*

*Did you ever sigh, when you heard the low voice singing,*

*A singer is telling about love and sadness*

*When you met that young man in the woods,*

*The flame of youth is extinguished in his eyes,*

*Have you ever sighed"*

After reading this poem called "Singer", I didn't understand it very well, but I felt very shocked, as if the young man in the forest really walked into my heart.

Under the cold dawn light, he stood in the dense fir forest, stepped on the lavender snow, and leaned against the straight brown-gray tree trunk, with a gentle and calm expression.There is a sad look in the green eyes, hidden under the fir tree, the golden eyelashes are covered with a layer of light frost, the sad tears condense in the corner of the eyes and turn into a romantic mole, and the bright red lips are slightly parted , as if singing from ancient times, weeping and complaining, drifting along the misty fields.

No, why green eyes?

I snapped the book shut, and what the hell was I thinking about him?

Annoyed, I threw the poetry collection on the table, then walked back to the wire bed and curled up under the warm blanket.

How can someone like me read poetry?I should be a hooligan who joked with prostitutes on the street. When I was unhappy, I kicked the potted cornflowers planted by old ladies. I had a fight with the three Karl brothers and got bruised and bruised. I was in the basement with Misha. Street gangsters who do all sorts of obscene things to strippers.

I chuckled lightly and fell asleep with my arms pillowed on my head.

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PS: There was an emperor in the Roman Empire named "Julian".