because i'm pretty

Li Yikai bowed his head in silence for a while, then turned his head and walked away and said, "I really don't know what's the point of him doing this now."

"Maybe he doesn't know himself," Yuan Zhiming said slowly, "Maybe, he just wanted to see you, so he did it."

"This is his logic," Li Yikai shook his head as if giving up.

They walked down the steps side by side, Li Yikai said slowly: "The two of them...I mean my mother and him."

"It's because of me that I got married, otherwise my grandfather would not agree."

After a while, he said again: "What he told you about writing, being a model and an actor, he said it nicely, but in fact he just has nothing to do."

Yuan Zhiming turned to look at him, hesitant to speak.

"It's different from you," Li Yikai understood what he meant: "If he had half your hard work or talent, he wouldn't still be nothing by now."

Li Yikai said this very harshly, but no one can accuse him of it-it is not as easy to judge one's father as having accomplished nothing, as it is to ridicule an insignificant person.For Li Yikai, half of these words were aimed at himself.

Yuan Zhiming listened quietly, and then just asked: "What happened next?"

"Later, my grandfather couldn't do anything about them, and he couldn't really see that he couldn't even support himself, so he helped him find a job as a proofreader and editor in a publishing house," Li Yikai said lightly.

Yuan Zhiming said: "He told me... maybe in those few years, he also tried to be a good father."

Li Yikai didn't deny it, just said: "I don't know, because in my memory, it was that he came home less and less often, or came back smelling of alcohol. Then the two of them quarreled and reconciled easily, and even changed Even better than before."

"This cycle seems to be endless, until he suddenly disappeared one day."

"You mean... run away from home?" Yuan Zhiming had a hard time finding the right words, but running away from home sounded like a teenager, not something the father of a five-year-old would do.

"If this is home for him," Li Yikai said: "His hometown is not in Jinghai, and he has no relatives. I don't think he has the concept of home at all, or as he said, family is painful for him. .”

After getting in the car, Yuan Zhiming opened the front and rear windows to the maximum, so that it should be a pleasant and relaxing thing to drive in the suburbs like this, but both of them are a little worried.

The straight road unfolded in front of him, and Yuan Zhiming was in a daze for a while before saying: "He told me that he hoped that I would not encounter the same thing as him."

"Don't compare yourself with him," Li Yikai said intently, looking ahead.

"Although I don't agree with what he did, but... if I say I can understand it, don't you think it's unreasonable?" Yuan Zhiming said, "Because, I also thought about not being associated with anyone. , I don’t want to take responsibility because of social relations, as if I can be completely free in this way.”

"It's not unreasonable." Li Yikai glanced at him, "But thinking about it and doing it are two different things."

"Yeah", Yuan Zhiming also looked at him and smiled: "I told him I wouldn't do it."

"It doesn't matter if you do, if one day you really feel too tired, and you have to bear too many constraints because you have to adapt to this relationship, tell me you want to go." Li Yikai took the time to stretch out his right hand and quickly touched him The side face: "I will not hold grudges for this, nor will I stalk."

"Just don't just disappear without saying a word. Or if you can, better let me know where you're going and let me know how you're doing."

"I won't, I won't leave you for this reason, I already thought about it when I planned to be with you," Yuan Zhiming said seriously.

"Although there is no way to prove it, I think you'd better believe it," he whispered, "I think I will always like you and be with you forever."

"I believe it," Li Yikai laughed sincerely, "Me too."

Even if this guarantee does not take effect, even if one day you really leave, Li Yikai thinks, I will always like you, and maybe I will hold the idea that you may come back, and I will always follow you in my heart .

Li Yikai's car plays jazz or old songs all the year round, and the melody soaked in the years reverberates in the car.This song was released in 1982. Li Yikai clearly remembered that the old-fashioned tape was placed in the innermost layer of the cabinet by Hu Manting. Spring leaves.

"I understand love, but it's always something."

"How many vows of eternal love in spring and autumn rain will go away with the wind."

On the second day of the holiday, Yuan Zhiming was going home. He had made a plan a week earlier, and at first he didn't take it as a big deal. When he told Li Yikai, it was as casual as discussing who to sleep with after get off work every day.

However, that night, Li Yikai used a rare force, and Yuan Zhiming twisted his face to see the red mark on his shoulder, and there were faint marks of his fingers.

"My dad thought I was beaten when he saw it," he complained in a low voice.

Li Yikai withdrew, was knotting the condom and throwing it into the trash can, when he heard the sound, he came over and kissed the tip of his nose, and said in a low voice, "I'm in charge."

"You don't cum｜come in", Yuan Zhiming didn't blush at all when he said these words, he was quite confident: "What's the responsibility?"

"Ancestor", Li Yikai smiled and went to kiss him again: "You have to drive tomorrow, it will be uncomfortable. I will give it all to you next time, good boy."

It's my turn next time, Yuan Zhiming thought, but he didn't argue with him.

"Li Yikai", Yuan Zhiming raised his hand and touched his back and said, "Actually, my dad knows about you, I mean, he knows that I am in love with you."

"Really?" Li Yikai raised his head and raised his eyebrows slightly because of surprise: "When did it happen?"

Yuan Zhiming is embarrassed to say that he was seen through before they were officially together.He just replied vaguely: "It's very early, my dad is very open about these things, so I didn't hide it from him."

"I want to say", he raised his body to reach Li Yikai's lips, rubbed them together, and then said: "I want to introduce you to my family, but because of the Ching Ming Festival, my father went to visit my mother's grave Sometimes, I will be in a bad mood, so I want to wait for the next time, the next holiday, do you want to go back to Huaizhou with me?"

"Thinking so much", Li Yikai gently rubbed his sweaty hair, hugged him and turned around, the two of them lay sideways on the bed, their bodies were tightly pressed together, and their heartbeats were vibrating together.

"Go back and stay with Dad obediently, take a look at Mom, and say hello to them for me. Next time, maybe it's the Dragon Boat Festival, we'll go back together."

"Okay", Yuan Zhiming was a little itchy from his hair, and moved his position. "Actually, I thought about more."

"Huh? What's there?"

"I still want to go back and tell my dad about my work." Yuan Zhiming took Li Yikai's waist and hugged him a little tighter: "He always told me not to worry about money and not to worry about making money. But I think, It’s normal to work to make money, but in fact, it’s just the same as most people, and even those great artists have done various jobs to support themselves, which is nothing.”

Li Yikai rubbed his shoulder, the part that was pinched red by himself, and said, "He just doesn't want you to work so hard."

"No one doesn't work hard," Yuan Zhiming said, "It was my dad, and I used to think of myself as an artist too much, as if it could be avoided."

Li Yikai didn't speak for a moment, and when he spoke again, his voice became a little hoarse: "Okay, in fact, I can also raise you, if you want."

"Keep your money for later," Yuan Zhiming put his legs on him: "Just in case I get resigned."

"Why do you always feel that you will be resigned?" Li Yikai pinched his thigh and asked.

Yuan Zhiming said the third thing he thought about.

"Actually, before the holiday, Feng Xin told me about a project. I wanted to refuse, but I still felt that I should participate."

Li Yikai didn't go to the company a few days before the holiday. He didn't know about it, so he asked, "What project? Why do you want to refuse?"

"For projects related to the Jinghai International Film Festival, the sponsors of the film festival will do derivative activities." Yuan Zhiming roughly explained the background. It sounds like a very interesting and suitable project for him.

"But Feng Xin said that this is a request from Gu Changfeng, who is the co-sponsor of the event."

Li Yikai was slightly surprised at first, but soon felt reasonable: "Then Feng Xin should value it very much. If you get on the boat of the film festival and Gu Changfeng, I will take you to train and train. Compared with the departure of me and Lao Qin , is completely insignificant.”

He lowered his head and asked, "So why do you want to refuse? Because of Gu Changfeng?"

Yuan Zhiming admitted in a low voice: "Well, because he will do those things, I think that this kind of situation should still happen when he cooperates with Feng Xin."

The conflict between Li Yikai and Gu Changfeng was only found out after Yuan Zhiming asked several times, and as he expected, it was not as simple as Li Yikai's understatement.

This well-known "ancient style" no longer means a single designer or artist.Behind him is a whole team—more than a dozen designers as the brains, put forward ideas for his project, and then he himself screens, makes comments, sends back to revise, and finally completes it.

The whole process is almost the same as the graduation project tutored by the teachers of the Academy of Fine Arts. The only difference is that these projects are aimed at the name of Gu Changfeng, and the name that is finally presented is also and only the name of Gu Changfeng.

So Li Yikai, who was a trainee designer back then, almost had a big fight and left resolutely because Li Yikai, who was younger and more tempered, could not even participate in the proposal after his design was selected.

But after so many years, the calm and mature Li Yikai did not completely deny this person.

"As an artist, Gu Changfeng, or Gu Changfeng who pioneered the road of commercial art design, does have his uniqueness. I don't want you to give up learning from him because of these impressions," Li Yikai added Once said, "So this time, I should still be wronged, but I should also be inspired."

He stroked the hair on the back of Yuan Zhiming's head, and asked in his ear, "Have you thought about it?"

"Think it over," Yuan Zhiming said, "I think it's nothing more than making wedding dresses for others, but I was originally a Miao Jia designer, not an artist Yuan Zhiming. As you said, Gu Changfeng also It’s a brand, not him alone. So in this way, I think it’s acceptable.”

"More importantly, I think I have to live with it," he added. "We all want to change things like this, but before I do that, I need to understand it."

Li Yikai is like a tree that grows alone. Passers-by can borrow it to enjoy the shade, and birds that fly by can temporarily roost. He is used to thinking of himself as the one who is always reliable, and he has never thought about what a tree can do. rely on other people.

Unexpectedly, Yuan Zhiming ran out of his forest, walked around the lonely tree a few times, and finally decided to stay for some unknown reason.

He didn't just decide to stay.

Yuan Zhiming, a small animal, can run and leave, but now Yuan Zhiming is taking root bit by bit.He buried his home, his future, and his erratic personalities around Li Yikai one by one, slowly growing roots and entwining with him.

"Don't worry that I will run away," Yuan Zhiming said, "I want to become an ordinary person for you, and I also want to become a very extraordinary person with you."