My baby tamer can't be the leader

I'm almost used to Dazai's toothpaste-squeezing style of venting, mainly because he doesn't want to say that I really can't do anything about him...I've already said that I'm not his kind of control freak!

Especially this guy will bottom out and rebound when he is pushed, which is very troublesome anyway!Let fly to make a fuss, let him make a fuss, it's really Andersen on the run The Princess and the Pea belongs to it.

The theaters on the ship are small exhibition halls. In each exhibition hall, there are only a few beds for guests to lean on, and there are snacks and drinks that can be taken by themselves beside them... Although the environment and services are still in place, but in Seeing Cameron's big ship in the screening room, I was still speechless for a moment.

How can anyone watch the Titanic from a moving ship?Isn't this the same as flying to see the catastrophe in the sky? !

It's not that superstition is not superstitious, the problem is that it's the same as going to an abandoned teaching building to watch pen fairies or something. It's possible, but it's not necessary, and I'm not such a thrill-seeking person!

It's just that Dazai's thoughts are obviously different from mine. He whispered in an almost envious tone, "Such a romantic way of dying...is really enviable."

"Where is this romantic??" I was so shocked that I ignored his sneaky gesture of hugging me for a while, and raised my hand to ravage his beautiful face for a while, "Wake me up, it is very painful to be frozen to death! "

"Hmm..." Seeing him showing a slightly pensive look, I was just a little relieved that he finally gave up this horrible idea, when I saw him shrinking into my arms, grabbing the corner of my clothes, He answered me in a whispering tone, "However, jumping off a building is also very painful."

"……what?"

Dazai looks like a caterpillar that is about to turn into a butterfly, trying to get into the cocoon he likes. The only difference is that other caterpillars choose leaves, but he keeps pushing into my arms. Squeeze...you can't hug me, so you just do the opposite!Is it good to use reverse thinking?

He also pulled my wristband along his spine, and his slight breath brushed my neck, not showing a trace of charm, but more like a feeling of returning home.

A kind of answer that was about to come out was interrupted by his movement again, and I asked him with some helplessness, "Are you a little kangaroo looking for a big kangaroo's pouch? Don't get in, you're going to squeeze me down."

"Hey? Isn't it a parasite looking for a host?"

"...It's not necessary, don't say that about yourself?!" I couldn't bear to look directly at my forehead, "What kind of mentality did you say that?!"

"Without a host, there is no way to live alone." He leaned calmly on my shoulder, his dark curly hair tickled me, "Ah, so it seems that microorganisms such as bacteria can also work together with hosts. To die together, to be ashes together, is really the most coveted way to die."

too horrible! !If I'm looking for excitement, I don't need to watch any horror movies. This guy's occasional truth is much scarier than horror movies! !

"No need! Give me a little independence, you bastard!!"

Dazai seemed to have smiled, but didn't seem to have said, "That's too tiring."

"Living is really a hard thing." He said, "Someone told me that people live for desire, but I don't know? Whether it is money or power, I have always struggled to understand, those things that are at your fingertips What is there to pursue?"

"But those are not important now, maybe I really can't feel half of the joy because of these things, but if those things can keep you away from danger and live the life you want, then it is meaningful to me .”

"I will rejoice in your joy, be irritated by your anger, and grieve by your sorrow."

He read it slowly, his voice seemed to be traveling through the thick clouds, misty and soft, with a bit of sadness in the rain, "...But I can't experience such feelings alone, this Perhaps a birth defect? ​​So, from this point of view, it does look like a parasite?"

"It's not." I denied, "Emotions are not something that will be reduced after being divided like nutrition. Emotions will only become more vivid because of sharing... However, this behavior of betting all the chips on others It's dangerous, even for me."

"It's okay." He seemed to be sighing, "I've seen the worst, so I've already...been mentally prepared."

Although it is true that the atmosphere of this meeting may not be quite right, I suddenly thought of an unserious question... and asked it outrightly.

That is to say, I am really very quiet, and because I speak Chinese, even if others hear me, they don’t know what I am talking about, otherwise I might freeze in place after asking!

After hearing this, Dazai looked up at me with a half-smile, "Body and mind are two different concepts, right? Of course, if it makes you happy, I'm sure I'd be more interested in it too? Since you're so curious, then ask yourself Come and try, Xiaoqi?"

"That's still not enough!" I refused with all my strength, and tried my best to change the subject, "Well, why don't you take a break first? It's still a while before 12 o'clock."

"Huh? You're so mean." He lengthened the ending, and after complaining dissatisfiedly, he hugged me tightly in retaliation, "If you want to change the subject, in exchange, let me hug you for a while?"

I was so wronged that I didn't dare to speak, so I could only swallow my anger honestly, hugged his back, listened to his gentle breathing, and froze for a while, secretly playing with my phone.

This déjà vu... I am really like a straight man who falls asleep when he and his girlfriend watch a movie about youth pain, and then seizes every opportunity to play games!

Sad, I'm obviously not a particularly straight type!But for a princess like Dazai whose thoughts are so delicate that they can be measured in microns, let me admit it honestly...

It's just that looking at the Sleeping Beauty in my arms who is sleeping defenselessly, I rarely have the urge to kiss him just purely.

Although it may be a mouthful to say this, but before I said it was not so much because of the soft emotion of 'like', it was more because it was the most convenient way to appease him...

That's strange... It's not that I still don't like him as a lover, otherwise, even if it was the kind of relationship between me and him, I would never go beyond that to make that kind of joke.

It’s like there’s a missing link in everything up to this point, or rather, a big piece missing from the very center of the puzzle, making it hard for me to be unabashedly honest about my liking.

...What is missing?That lack is so distinct at this moment, as if the bright moon hangs high in the night sky, showing its own existence at all times.

But at the same time, it is so mysterious that from my current perspective, I can only see one side of it forever.

……

11:45

While suddenly waking up from his sleep, Dazai immediately stopped his subconscious movement of getting up, his eyes flicked inch by inch over the delicate eyebrows and eyes of the people around him.

"Are you awake?" Xia Qi gave a small huff, "Are you leaving again?"

She seemed to be sleepy and lost her mind, revealing the dependence she rarely allowed herself to show, and let go of her hand in a low voice, "When I want to stay with you, you will run away, I hate you."

His pupils shrank slightly, and some kind of turbulent emotion almost overwhelmed his reason.

'I want to stay', 'Facts or something, that kind of thing doesn't matter at all, right? ', 'As long as the means are... a little more, there are as many opportunities as there are'... He has ten thousand reasons to stay, but...he still chose the only one that made him insist on leaving.

"I'm sorry." Dazai heard his voice dry as hell, and his reluctance almost turned into substance, "But, I want to tell you everything—rather than letting me tell you empty words, I want to... let you Witness all that with your own eyes, and let you choose the final outcome yourself."

She let go of the hand holding his clothes in silence, and at the same time when Dazai's mood slowly fell into the deep ravine following her turning around, she said, "Then go."

"I thought...you would be angry."

"Stupid." Xia Qi lazily waved her back to him, "Because I like you, everything you do is right. It also applies to me occasionally."

If it was normal, Dazai would pester her and complain why it was 'occasionally', but at this moment, he just wanted to hug her again without hesitation, and tell her all the unbearable things he buried deeply, Even if that meant putting aside his own chest with his own hands, opening up that ugly scar, and holding the already riddled heart in front of her eyes.

No matter who Dazai is, he is extremely willful and arrogant. Even he can be so willful that he can easily determine his own destiny just because of the memory of other Dazai... But at this moment, he is holding back Under the impulse that was so strong that it was almost impossible for him to restrain, he turned around and walked towards the door step by step.

He didn't want to use that subjective experience to complain to her, and he didn't want to win her sympathy for that kind of reason... Just as he promised, he would let her witness everything with his own eyes.