grey alley

A confused dream, chaotic scenes, screams, cars, pedestrians, and the back of Pei Xiqing pushing the suitcase farther and farther...

Lu Mingzhou woke up with a start, his chest heaved and heaved, and then a severe headache hit him the next moment. He couldn't help but close his eyes and slowly adjust his breathing. The pain in his legs was even worse than the headache. It was so intense that Lu Mingzhou's face turned completely pale.

The instrument next to him recorded the numerical fluctuations of his body, and a cold hand stretched out to caress his face, as if to soothe the dizziness and nausea that surged up the moment he woke up, as well as the multiple attacks that came up together. pain.

"Be gentle, don't move around." The owner of this hand said beside his bed.

Lu Mingzhou gritted his teeth in a daze and looked over intently. When the black spots and double shadows in front of him dissipated, he saw Pei Xiqing who was leaning on a chair and sitting nondescriptly. Someone peeled the apple for him, took a bite, saw him look at it and smiled, "Good morning, uncle."

"Want some water? I'll get you some," Pei Xiqing seemed excited, "or I'll feed you."

After feeding him the water, Pei Xiqing continued to chew the piece of apple in his mouth, then picked up the glass of water that Lu Mingzhou drank just now, and put the apple into his stomach bit by bit. He seemed a little nauseous , but held back in front of him, smiled slightly at Lu Mingzhou, crossed his fingers and straightened his sitting posture, and frowned slightly, "Uncle, before you speak, I want to tell you one thing, it is that I didn't finish talking that day Yes, can you listen to me?"

Lu Mingzhou looked at him without rolling his eyes, and he didn't make a sound.

"Then I'll take it as your promise."

He bent slightly towards Lu Mingzhou, "How much did I say that day, ah, let me think about it," he patted his head, "It seems that my dad was pushed downstairs, right? It wasn't long after Jiang Qianxue killed my dad. Tian also committed suicide at home, in fact, she didn't just want to commit suicide at that time, she also wanted me to accompany her."

Since Pei Xingu's death, there have been successive small media visits. Jiang Qianxue never refused. She was very sad in front of the camera, gently wiping the tears on her face, and the overflowing emotions were half-covered and half-covered just right. , just like an ordinary wife who couldn't accept the fact that she lost her husband, she didn't know how much pain she had endured behind it, she seemed sad and desperate.

She was perfectly disguised.

After the meager heat of this matter passed, she was still the woman who remained expressionless after pushing her husband who had been with her for many years downstairs.

Without Pei Xingu, Jiang Qianxue was no longer willing to pretend to be docile and obedient.She locked Pei Xiqing tightly at home and didn't let him go out. She cooked all kinds of his favorite food for three meals a day in different ways, and then watered the flowers, mopped the floor, and messed with him as before as if nothing had happened. Sanitation, go out to buy vegetables, go home to cook, and then go into Pei Xiqing's room every half hour to see what he is doing.

Pei Xiqing tried to lock the door and put a table against the door to keep her out, but he didn't expect that this move would make Jiang Qianxue go crazy without warning.

She twisted the handle frantically, but she couldn't unscrew it no matter what, so she patiently and gently coaxed the people inside to open the door to let her in, but after 5 minutes there was no movement in the room, she He suddenly started to smash the door, again and again, making a shockingly loud bang, bang bang bang, the back of his finger was smashed to pieces, and the white door was covered with her blood.But she seemed not to notice the pain and called out to the people inside, with a shrill voice: "Xiqing, open the door, open the door! Let mom in! Mom can't see you anymore! Open the door quickly..."

No matter how much she yelled, there was no movement inside. In the end, she went to the kitchen and took out a bone-chopping knife to split the door open. She grabbed the man who was curled up in a ball under the quilt, and tightly held him tightly in her arms. His nails sank into his shoulders, and he asked loudly with crazy eyes: "I have been shouting outside for so long, my voice is hoarse, why didn't you open the door, did you do it on purpose, did you want to fight against mom, is it Qing, tell me, you don’t like mom anymore, don’t you, don’t you like mom? Don’t you?!”

"How could you lock me out!" The next moment, Jiang Qianxue slapped his head away with a fierce slap, and the room was so quiet that only her panting could be heard for a while.

The nosebleed stained the shirt red, Jiang Qianxue was stunned for a moment, and suddenly held his face back nervously, covering his bleeding nose, crying and laughing, "I'm sorry, Xiqing, I'm sorry, don't hate me, I I really didn't mean it, Mom was just worried about you too much, I'm sorry..." She hugged him back into her arms, sobbing softly, tears slid down Pei Xiqing's browbones into his eyes, and then from his eye sockets. fall out.

Pei Xiqing's hands trembled as she refused, but she fell down powerlessly in the end.

He spent three sickly days, using his own way to silently resist Jiang Qianxue's desire to possess and control all the time. Finally, after three days, Jiang Qianxue couldn't stand it anymore, every detail of rejection revealed by his son They were all stimulating her fragile nerves, and in the end she held the idea of ​​being bound with him forever and thought of dying.

"I used to be puzzled why she would do this to no one, but she would do this to me." Pei Xiqing took another piece of apple from the fruit plate and chewed it in his mouth: "I finally figured it out. She has always thought that I was born by her, and it is a private property that belongs to her alone." He smiled, "It is an object, not a person. So she has raised it in that way since she was a child. Me, the purpose is to take care of me, and she will be satisfied if I can’t do without her for the rest of my life. So when I want to learn to take care of my own life, her reaction at that time is so big .”

"Because she is afraid that I have learned everything, and I don't need her anymore, and then I will leave her."

Lu Mingzhou still looked at him, his lips were bloodless, and he was so quiet that he didn't say a word.

"Uncle," Pei Xiqing lowered his head and rubbed his face against his hand, "you have always been the best person in the world to me." He emphasized, "You are different, different."

"And then?" Lu Mingzhou's voice was hoarse.

He had a premonition that what Pei Xiqing had suffered was far more than these, but many things were exposed by him in a few words and vaguely, without really getting to the point.

"Then she locked me in the room and starved for three days, making me unable to escape. Then, she came in with a fruit knife to wipe my neck while I was asleep," Pei Xiqing shrugged, " In the end I woke up, I avoided it, she smiled and said that she would go to a place with me, where I no longer have to worry about my deformed body being ridiculed by others, she will let me grow up in the sun, and cry Say I’m sorry, when she was pregnant with me, she secretly took a lot of medicines without telling the doctor and father, and she also refused every prenatal check-up, which caused me to suffer from other people’s strange eyes when I was born. I said a lot In this case."

"Isn't this very repentant?" Pei Xiqing's voice was very soft: "But how could she be repentant?"

He stuffed the apple into his mouth and said vaguely: "In fact, she wished that I would be shameless, so that she would have a reason to tie me up at home. Of course, she would say such things at that time just to deceive me That's all in the past."

"Later..." Pei Xiqing paused, "Anyway, of course I didn't go there, and then she committed suicide, and made a strange request to me, maybe I'm not allowed to call the police and want me and her corpse Stay for a day and a night or something."

He laughed and said: "At that time, she was lying on the ground and looking at me so directly, which made a deep impression on me. Now I think about it, I'm quite scared."

After he finished speaking, he didn't say any more, and the room suddenly became silent, and a needle could be heard.

Pei Xiqing's fingers were twitching unconsciously, twitching like a tremor, and the next moment he was suddenly held down by Lu Mingzhou on the bed, his gaze was like a knife, fixed on Pei Xiqing, "What else? "

anything else?

The memory of that day is like a poisonous pus hidden under the flesh. As time goes by, it greedily ferments and grows in it, rooting deep into his soul, sucking up all the things he likes. The nourishment and affection of anger, sorrow and joy turned him into a man who was neither human nor ghost, barely dragging his body to survive in the human world.

Lu Mingzhou's knife was hanging above the poisonous pus.

"And then?" Pei Xiqing murmured.Then what happened?

Hearing that his mother's coaxing failed, he rushed over frantically with a gesture of fighting, swearing at him every word with vicious eyes.She said: "Don't you love your mother, don't you want to go with your mother? Why do you still want to stay here? Who else would love you, a deformed monster like you, who is neither male nor female?"

"Except for mother, who would love you like this all the time, take care of you, and carefully pull you up in your mouth? You are letting me down! How can you be so heartless," she gasped, pulling him With unbelievable strength, he personally smashed the dignity and life of his own son bit by bit, stepped on his feet, and demoted into the dust: "Look at you, look at yourself, you are a monster , who would love you, except mom! Who would love you!!!”

His trousers were pulled down, Jiang Qianxue stared at him and laughed, and said with tears, "See if you are a man or a woman. The doctor said that when you approach adulthood, the hormones in your body change. When the time comes, you Will you be pressed down by other men for fun like a woman, huh? Tell mom, you have a body like this, you will let a man fuck. Will you? Ah?! Tell mom!"

Her words were like the whispers of the devil, lingering in his ears, lingering for many years, like the poisonous pus that took root all the way to the bottom.

"Qingqing is not a little monster, Qingqing will always be mother's baby."

"Even if I die, I will still keep looking at you, seeing you living alone in this world like a monster, you have no relatives, no lover, you are alone, and you will be alone for the rest of your life."

"Qingqing will be a painter, engineer, or astronaut when she grows up? Mom is really looking forward to it. I really want to see what you will look like when you grow up."

"I want you to remember that no one will love you, and you will not love anyone. The only person you can love is me. You must always remember me."

"Qingqing is awesome, mom loves you so much, mom really wants to be with lovely Qingqing forever and ever."

"It was I who spared your life to let you see how you can stand on your feet and survive in this world. Mom will always be by your side to watch you and see how miserable you will be in the future , how desolate, how pitiful, homeless like a bereaved dog, Xiqing, don't even try to get rid of me."

"Mom will always love you forever."

"You are a monster, without me, you are nothing, hahahahahahaha... No one will love you forever but me... Poor guy," she lay in a pool of blood, smiling at him, dumb Repeat audibly, "...no...anyone."

She who can say such words is no longer a mother, she is just a mentally disturbed devil who stabs her own flesh and blood with a knife.

When Pei Xiqing came back to his senses, Lu Mingzhou was sitting up propped up and wiped his face with a tissue in a panic. His tears and nosebleeds were mixed together. He was a little dizzy and couldn't even sit still. The wound in the wound is excruciatingly painful.

He grabbed Lu Mingzhou's hand, raised an extremely ugly smile and said, "Don't worry, uncle," he climbed back on the chair, took out a few pieces of paper and covered his nose, tears dried up after only two drops , and continued: "Actually, I felt a little sad at first, and I couldn't tell where the sadness in my heart came from, but gradually I didn't feel sad."

Nosebleeds flowed quickly, and he changed a few sheets of paper: "Because afterwards I always feel that this world is like a fake."

"My mind is thinking that I seem to have been separated from myself and can't integrate into this world."

"Those things in my memory, what I have encountered, experienced, everything around me, those who laugh or make trouble, even including you, sometimes I feel that it is not true."

Jiang Qianxue was extremely sensitive, neurotic, and extremely possessive, but she failed to assimilate Pei Xiqing into a person like herself, and instead pushed him to another extreme.

"Uncle, do you think I'm indifferent?" Pei Xiqing rubbed the back of his hand and raised his eyes, his eyes were clear, and the nosebleed that could not be wiped off slipped down his wrist: "Sometimes I also feel very indifferent, and Pretentious and hypocritical, it seems that her words have always taken root in my body and have an impact on me."

"Actually, I don't know a lot of things. I don't know what I think, why I make such a decision. My behavior sometimes feels weird to me, and it always hurts your heart and hurts you." You have become like this, uncle, I’m sorry, I’m really useless, and I don’t want to…”

He kept apologizing, and his whole body began to tremble. Because of the obstructed breathing, he was coughing uncontrollably due to nosebleeds. Lu Mingzhou hurriedly pulled him into his arms, but the moment Pei Xiqing fell into his arms, he suddenly let go of his strength. The whole person was lying still.

Lu Mingzhou's mind was in a state of chaos, his eyes were flushed and his face was lifted up, and he could only see his tightly closed eyes and blood on his face. He immediately panicked, and his voice cut through the silent corridor of the ward, almost changing his tone: "Doctor, doctor ——!”

No one noticed Mrs. Jiang, who was limp outside the door, and Jiang Wei, who was by her side. His tears made the ground dizzy, but the whole person seemed to have lost his soul.

作者有话要说：明天还有一章结局呦，晚安宝儿么么。感谢在2022-04-1621:30:27~2022-04-1721:54:55期间为我投出霸王票或灌溉营养液的小天使哦~

Thanks to the little angels of the irrigation nutrient solution: 2 bottles of Sikong Jiancha; 1 bottle of Qi Yuanan;

Thank you very much for your support, I will continue to work hard!