"Brother, I see that your seal is black and your eyes are full of clouds. Recently, everything is not going well? Why don't you let Pindao do the math for you?"

At the entrance of the alley, he was stopped by an old Taoist with fluttering clothes, who looked like a fairy, An Honghong said expressionlessly, "Oh."

The white-bearded old man raised his eyebrows, mysteriously took out a thread-bound book from the sleeve of his Taoist robe, pointed to the big characters of "Tathagata God Palm", and talked endlessly: "This is the secret book handed down by the poor Taoist ancestors. If you want to practice this Gong, not only does not need to come from the palace, but also can be refreshed, full of energy, and invincible all over the world, now I sell it to you at a cheap price, as long as [-], [-]! Why are you still hesitating, hurry up and start!"

An Honghong glanced at the cheat book, and said calmly, "Are you Ouyang Feng, a senior from Shaolin Temple?"

"No, no, no," the old Taoist stroked his beard, "I am Hong Qigong's No.18 direct disciple..."

An Honghong smiled and nodded: "Can you squat down?"

"What?" The old man was at a loss.

An Honghong pressed his shoulders, and pressed down lightly: "Yes, that's it, squat down...OK, raise your head and face me..."

After all, An Honghong rubbed her feet in the quagmire beside her, and with a roundabout kick, her footprints of 42 yards hit the old man's face. "Fellow Taoist, I see that your seal is black, do you want me to help you calculate?" An Honghong folded her hands together and made an Amitabha gesture, "By the way, I forgot to tell you, Hong Qigong is My grandson. According to seniority, you still have to call me Zuzuzuzuzuzushiye."

"I, QNMLGB, you bastard..." The liar Taoist finally couldn't help it anymore, the fake beard and fake eyebrows on his face were still sticky with mud, "I'll fight you!"

An Honghong took a step back alertly, pointed behind the liar Taoist priest and said loudly: "Not good! Urban management!"

As soon as the liar heard the word chengguan, he was so frightened that he couldn't get his shit out of his ass. He threw the palm of the Tathagata on the ground and didn't have time to pick it up. He grabbed his clothes and ran away.An Honghong picked up the 18 cheat book, turned it over in her hand, and found a porn advertisement on the last page: "Are you still worried about not having a girlfriend? Contact me, [-]XXXXXXXXXX, Lonely rich woman in Hong Kong, I give you a warm embrace, a haven of home."

An Honghong slammed the book to the ground, and stomped on it with a ferocious face: "You don't have a girlfriend! Your whole family doesn't have a girlfriend!"

Yes, An Honghong has lost her love.No, he hasn't had time to fall in love yet.

The failure of yesterday's confession made An Honghong depressed all the time, like a ticking time bomb, ready to explode.An Honghong has been secretly in love with Bai Xue, the goddess of the foreign language department, for three whole years. Ever since he caught a glimpse of her when she first entered the freshman year, he has been unable to extricate herself from it.This bitter love has been buried in her heart for so long, and finally yesterday, An Honghong held a bouquet of flowers to confess her love.Of course, the result can be imagined.

For this confession, An Honghong has worked hard.He went through the daily fortune, horoscope, and even the old almanac, and finally found that [-] o'clock yesterday afternoon was the best time to confess his love.

However, when he held a bouquet of flowers in both hands and knelt down on one knee and confessed affectionately, the goddess' face turned green: "This... chrysanthemum is very beautiful..."

An Honghong burst into tears, and the goddess praised his flowers for being beautiful!The goddess praised him! "Then... can you accept the full love brought by this bouquet?"

The goddess curled her lips in embarrassment, with a slightly embarrassed expression: "Although you are ugly, I still think our personalities are not suitable."

An Honghong chased after her: "If you don't get in touch with me, how can you know that our personalities are not suitable?"

The goddess smiled and comforted: "Actually, you are very nice, but I still feel that we are not in the same style."

An Honghong was planning to continue chasing after her facelessly, when a tall boy suddenly walked up to the goddess, "She already has a boyfriend." The boy took advantage of the opportunity and put his arms around the goddess' shoulders.

An Honghong's heart was twisted like a knife, and seeing the goddess nestled in the man's arms like a bird clinging to him was even more heartbreaking.

Why!What's wrong with me, why don't you love me!

He is just a little bit taller and handsome than me, but I have a beautiful heart!

An Honghong got up from the ground in a daze, held up a handful of chrysanthemums in her hand, and said to the goddess with tears in her eyes, "Bai...Bai Xue, we can't be righteous if we buy or sell. This flower...you should take it!"

Bai Xue's face darkened completely.

"Don't you know that chrysanthemums are given to the dead?" The boy beside Bai Xue looked at him mockingly.

An Honghong froze for a moment, then raised her head and stuffed the chrysanthemum into the boy's arms, with a bright smile on her face: "Then I'll give it to you."

Boy: "..."

"Student, have you finished confessing your love?" An Honghong was about to kick the boy tragically, and then left gracefully, but was patted on the shoulder by the person behind her.

An Honghong turned her head: "You are..."

"Please leave when you're done confessing, thank you." The boy standing behind An Honghong was fair-looking, wearing a pair of learned gold-rimmed glasses, and holding a large bouquet of red roses in his hand, "It's my turn, Please don't waste your time."

An Honghong: "..."

Are you an idiot? The person standing next to Bai Xue is her boyfriend! Why are you professing!I have failed!

The white and clean man holding the rose pushed his glasses and said expressionlessly: "I know what you are complaining about. Your failure does not mean that I will fail too. According to my calculations, our confession is independent of each other." , although confessing at the same time will affect their independence, but the probability of failure is not more than 20.00%, so if I confess, the success rate will far exceed your 80.00%. Because yours is zero."

An Honghong: "..."

"By the way, do you know why you failed?" Bai Jingnan smacked his lips, "First, you are not as handsome as the man next to Bai Xue, second, you are not as handsome as me, and third...according to my incomplete statistics , except for the school dormitory manager and the cafeteria uncle, there probably won't be more than 5.00% of people who are not as handsome as you."

An Honghong: "..."

Bai Jingnan smiled, turned to face Bai Xue, and raised the rose in his hand: "Hello Bai Xue, my name is Cheng Cheng, I hope you like this bouquet of roses, and accept my heart by the way. According to calculations, roses have the highest probability of success, about 80.00% six, and the second only to roses are perfume lilies, with a success rate of about 70.00%, and the success rate of zero... is chrysanthemum." He glanced at An Honghong.

Bai Xue looked embarrassed, she glanced at the tall boy beside her, and was about to say something, but Cheng Cheng suddenly interrupted her: "I know what you want to say, you want to use this man beside you as a shield to reject me Right? According to my observation and deduction, he is not your boyfriend."

The boy beside Bai Xue raised his eyebrows in surprise, signaling Cheng Cheng to continue.

"First, although he is standing next to you, you are not acting intimately, as you can see from the fact that he is holding your hand. Yes, normal male and female friends should put their arms around your waist, not your shoulders. Second. , you were very emotional when you saw this man, this is not like the behavior of a normal boyfriend and girlfriend, but like...you have a crush on him. Third..."

"Shut up!" Bai Xue's almond eyes widened, her face turned red with anger, she snatched the rose from Cheng Chengcheng's hand, and slammed it on his head, "Fuck your confession!" After finishing speaking, she stepped on her little high heels Da da ran away.

"Doesn't she like roses? It seems that the 80.00% success rate is not very reliable." Cheng Cheng stared blankly at the tall boy and scratched his head blankly.

"Hey." The tall boy snorted, walked up to An Honghong, stuffed the golden chrysanthemum into his hands, and then looked him up and down with malicious intentions, "If you give the chrysanthemum under you to me next time Give it to me, I might like it better."

An Honghong: "..."

"Hey, he insulted you so much, don't you fight back?" Cheng Cheng pointed to the back of the tall man going away, and asked An Honghong in surprise.

"There should be a first-come-first-served counterattack." An Honghong stretched out her index finger and pointed at Cheng Cheng's forehead, "Which green onion are you? Why disturb my confession!"

Cheng Cheng was taken a few steps back by An Honghong's sudden attack, and suddenly raised his head, his eyes brightened, as if he had discovered something important: "Who are you?"

"Who am I?!" An Honghong wiped her nose with her thumb like a Jay Chou, "Your grandpa will change his name and surname, so does An Honghong!"

"An Honghong..." Cheng Cheng looked at him in a daze, and said in a daze, "An Honghong... big brother! You are my big brother!"

An Honghong smacked her lips in satisfaction: "That's right, although you look cheap and tasteless, you deserve to be beaten for meddling in other people's business, but since you recognize me as the eldest brother, I will reluctantly accept you. My brother Hong has a very charming personality..."

Before he finished speaking, Cheng Cheng rushed up with tears in his eyes, and hugged him: "Brother! I've been looking for you so hard! I miss you so much!"

An Honghong was taken aback. This brother... has something wrong with his brain?Although he thinks that the problem of insanity is very serious, but after all, this is his first younger brother, so he can't hit him too much. This kind of mental problem should be able to be corrected in the future.

"Brother!" Cheng Cheng carefully looked at An Honghong's face with red eyes, and frowned slightly disgusted, "Brother, why did you choose such an ugly face for yourself? Look, the skin is not good. I still have acne, and my eyes are small, and I wear glasses, tsk tsk... I'm not tall, and I'm so thin..."

"Enough!" An Honghong was furious, and snapped her fingers, "Are you provocative?! See if I can't beat you to death!"

"Don't, don't, brother!" Cheng Cheng hurriedly hugged his head, and said with a mournful face, "I was wrong, I was wrong!"

An Honghong shook her hand: "Just know you're wrong..."

Cheng Cheng paused, then suddenly stepped forward and put his arms around An Honghong's shoulders: "Uh...Brother, we actually knew each other before, but you may not remember me anymore, so...I must restore your memory now... "

"What memory?" An Honghong was puzzled.

Cheng Cheng swallowed his saliva, stretched out his hands to hold An Honghong's face, with a shy expression, pouted his mouth and was about to stick it on An Honghong's mouth: "You will definitely remember..."

"Touch!" An Honghong finally couldn't hold back anymore, and punched Cheng Cheng right in the face.

……

The fleeting years are unfavorable.

An Honghong was in a terrible mood. She failed to confess her love yesterday, and was almost molested by a perverted gay guy. Today, she was ridiculed by a liar Taoist priest...Even if I did something immoral in my previous life, God, can you punish me in my next life!This life has already given me a face at the scene of a car accident, do you still want to take away my car accident pension!

An Honghong was about to cry without tears and squeezed the pimple on her nose in front of the mirror, when her roommate Chen Bo stood behind him and said sadly, "Can you stop squeezing?"

"What's wrong?" An Honghong was crying, her hands still moving.

"The red bean porridge I ate in the afternoon is about to vomit now."

An Honghong: "..."

"Honestly, Hong Hong," Chen Boyu patted him on the shoulder earnestly, "Don't worry too much about your appearance, you should read more books."

"Why?" An Honghong turned around.

Chen Bo's expression obviously twitched: "You are ugly...you should read more."

An Honghong's nose was swollen like a jujube, and she supported Chen Bo's shoulder with tears in her eyes: "Look at my face, Chen Bo."

Chen Bo looked up with difficulty.

"Think about it carefully, we have lived in the same bed for so many years, I will affect your Chen Bo (Chen Bo) one day!" An Honghong roared hoarsely, her nose sprayed out.

Chen Bo: "..."

"Ouch..." Chen Bo finally couldn't hold back, and rushed into the toilet.

An Honghong: "..."

When Chen Bo came out of the toilet, An Honghong was hanging on the balcony window in a strange posture.

"What are you doing?"

An Honghong turned her head and glanced at him resentfully: "I plan to die."

"Oh." Chen Bo nodded, suddenly remembered something, and pulled An Honghong's waistband, "Wait, I remembered, I have a ticket for the school's art show, you can go to hell after watching it .”

"I've long been ashamed, disillusioned with the world of mortals, how can I have the mood and time to be bewitched by these external things?" An Honghong looked out the window indifferently, "Besides, how can such a low-level cultural evening meet my compulsion?"

Chen Bo raised his eyebrows: "The host is your goddess Bai Xue."

An Honghong immediately jumped down from the window swiftly, and quickly groped for Chen Bo's trouser pockets: "When and where are the tickets?!"

Chen Bo: "..."

The school's annual cultural performance finally officially opened.The brightly lit auditorium, the overcrowded auditorium, and the slim beauties and etiquette standing in the aisle all added a lot to this cultural performance.Coupled with the excited and nympho cheerleaders in the front row, people who don't know would think this is the concert site of some famous star.

"To Ouba I love you! Just like a mouse loves rice!"

"Yes, yes, we can't do without you!" The girls blew their whistles and held up colorful sticks, shouting at the stage that hadn't even started yet. The charge is on.And among this group of uncontrollable female fans, An Honghong sat here alone.

"Hey, classmate, why are you here?" Finally, an impassioned girl discovered An Honghong's existence while panting.

An Honghong silently took out the ticket from her pocket: "My seat is here."

The girl thought about it thoughtfully, and suddenly said excitedly: "Could it be that you are also a follower of our senior Mu Chengyu? My God, it turns out that Cheng Yu Ouba has male fans... But, you will not be a gay Bar?"

Kei, your sister, Kei!Although An Honghong was angry in her heart, in order to avoid being attacked by all the girls, she had no choice but to nod embarrassingly: "How is it possible, I am just a pure fan."

The girl handed him a fluorescent stick boldly: "Come on, wave it, and shout!"

An Honghong: "..." Chen Bo, are you sure you're not messing with me?

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