I want to live, get married

After spending an afternoon in Shuyuanhui, the sun was already westward at this time, and the two walked along the bluestone slabs on the street, walking unhurriedly all the way.

In the past 20 years, Liu Yanhan has traveled countless roads, and he has probably forgotten them in his memory.

But that evening, with the setting sun and He Qingqing walking side by side in a small street in Nanyang City, I still remember it vividly for some reason.

Every plant and tree, every word, every frown and smile that day was deeply engraved in her mind, which only made her remember every step of the way.

The hawkers who set up stalls on both sides of the street have already started to close their stalls one after another. They are packing up and preparing to go home. Each household is sitting in the shop, and they have also begun to pick up their own signs and prepare to close their doors.

In the area where the common people live in the east, every household has started to light a fire and cook. I can see the curling smoke coming out of the chimneys on the roofs of each house, filling the air with the smell of cooking.

"Ermao, Ermao, go home for dinner, you son of a bitch..."

The yelling of the old mother from the alley, calling her son to go home for dinner, echoed in the sky at the end of the street.

"Brother Niu, wait for me!"

"Hurry up, it's too late, and it's time for your mother to rattle you when you go home."

In front of him, there are three or two urchins playing and chasing after them.

At first, the two just walked side by side quietly.

Seeing that He Qingqing has been silent and not speaking, just walking with her head depressed, Liu Yanhan guessed that she might still be depressed about what happened in Shuyuanhui just now.

Although it is not her fault, but He Qingqing is the eldest lady of He Mansion after all, and Yuanwai He is also a famous figure in Nanyang City. As the only daughter of He Mansion, she offended an official lady for no reason. Happy thing.

If the family finds out about it, especially Mrs. He, it is inevitable to give her a scolding.

In fact, regarding today's incident, Liu Yanhan felt that although He Qingqing was right, her actions were indeed too radical, and there was absolutely no need for her to argue with Mrs. Han face to face.

Take Lu Chashan's words, you can say whatever you want in private, why bother to compete in public.

Looking at He Qingqing's face, Liu Yanhan thought for a moment, then asked softly: "Sister Qing...not...Miss He..."

Just now in Shuyuanhui, the outgoing and enthusiastic Lu Chashan has been pushing her to address her as a sister, but after being unaccustomed for a while, Liu Yanhan subconsciously changed her name to Miss He.

"uh-huh……"

She coughed lightly to hide her embarrassment.

"Actually, I've always wanted to ask you a question."

Looking up at Liu Yanhan's solemn expression, He Qingqing replied indifferently: "You ask!"

"Actually..." After tidying up his words, Liu Yanhan tentatively said, "Actually, what happened in Shuyuanhui today is completely avoidable! Why do you have to offend Mrs. Han in court?"

"..."

He Qingqing didn't answer this question right away, she lowered her head sullenly.

Then he simply replied: "There is no reason, I have said it long ago, and there are some reasons that cannot be argued."

"But...but is it really worth it?"

Hearing what she said, Liu Yanhan couldn't help being puzzled: "Actually, according to what Miss Lu's family said just now, this Mrs. Han has hands and eyes, and the girls in Nanyang City have no time to cling to her. You don't need to do this at all to offend this person." It does more harm than good!"

He Qingqing lowered his head and thought for a while, bit the corner of his mouth, and then answered cautiously.

"Actually... Actually, I don't like my current life..."

After all, she stopped and let out a long sigh.

Facing Liu Yanhan directly with a pair of clear eyes, he said very seriously without any joke, "I don't like the current me even more."

Liu Yanhan was quite surprised by these words, she hesitated and asked a little puzzled.

"Miss He, I... I don't understand very well. You see that you are living a life full of bells and whistles, loved by your parents in the He Mansion, and taken care of by the whole family. Not everyone can live a life like yours, but you... Why don't you like it?"

"Don't you want to be like other ladies and ladies in Nanyang City, find a lover in the future, marry a good family, and take care of your husband and children?"

Speaking of this, He Qingqing smiled bitterly.

Shaking his head, without the slightest hesitation, he said, "I don't want to."

Liu Yanhan frowned and asked, "Why?"

"Maybe these things are for the ordinary ladies in the boudoir, it is only natural to find a good husband, husband and son in the future, but for me, I don't want to."

Liu Yanhan remained silent, listening to He Qingqing's narration quietly and seriously.

"Being well-off is an exchange with a clearly marked price for a famous family. I was ill when I was young, and no one would marry a sick child and go home to be a Bodhisattva." He Qingqing laughed at himself. With a sneer.

"It's just a physical reason! It's nothing..." Liu Yanhan comforted her.

"It's not impossible to be sick. If Miss He recovers in the future, you won't have these worries. You can be like other famous ladies and ladies. It's no problem!"

He Qingqing smiled lightly, still shook her head and said, "Actually, it's not entirely because of your health..."

She paused, then continued to walk forward, and Liu Yanhan immediately followed.

"I was in poor health when I was young, and I understood the impermanence of the world very early. I really counted the days on my fingers since I was a child. , marriage, husband, and heirs..."

She counted these marriages and relationships in the world one by one with her fingers, then clenched her fists and shook them in front of Liu Yanhan.

"It's like sand in my hand..." After finishing speaking, he spread his palm and raised it lightly.

She stared at the empty palm, and said bluntly: "Maybe one day a breeze will pass by, and it will disappear without a trace."

"Actually..." Liu Yanhan thought hard about how to say something nice to enlighten her.

"Actually, Miss He, you don't have to be so pessimistic. There is hope for everything."

Seeing Liu Yanhan's serious face, thinking hard to comfort others, He Qingqing couldn't help laughing.

She poked Liu Yanhan's arm with her hand, and joked with a relaxed face: "You don't need to comfort me, I've thought about it a long time ago, it doesn't really matter."

"And these things are a burden to me!" She nodded and emphasized: "Yes, it is a big burden."

"burden?"

"Yeah! I was weak when I was young, and the fortune teller said that I would not live long, so my family cared for me. My parents worried about me all day long, and everyone in the house was very nervous about me, for fear of any accident, so I The one who is always cared for and protected."

Speaking of this, an imperceptible trace of melancholy flashed across He Qingqing's face.

She sighed and continued: "So I don't like the life I have now, and I don't like myself now. A person like me can't maintain anything. I can only hide behind and be protected by others. Everything I have now is worthless." It is very fragile, maybe one day it will be wiped out with a light touch, and I will not be able to keep anything, and I can only owe my family and those who love me."

"I...I don't want anyone to be sad that I'm gone."

Speaking of this, He Qingqing seemed a little moved, even her voice trembled a little, and her eyes shone slightly.

She looked at Liu Yanhan and said firmly: "I said I admire Miss Liu sincerely, and I also want to be as capable as you and able to protect the people around me, instead of being worried and protected all the time. , I don’t want to force those impermanent things, I just want to protect what I can protect, and have what I can have.”

Looking at the focused, determined and fearless look of the person in front of him.

Liu Yanhan knew in his heart that his consolation at this moment seemed pale and ridiculous.

This Miss He family is actually far stronger than I imagined.

No matter what she has experienced before, her heart always seems to be soft and kind.

"Um……"

Therefore, Liu Yanhan didn't do any more tricks for doctors to enlighten patients.

Just nodded and said succinctly.

"Don't worry, since you have such thoughts, you will definitely get what you want in the future."

Hearing what she said, He Qingqing smiled happily.

Just now he was very depressed in the car, but now that Liu Yanhan is with him for a while, and he speaks out what is in his heart, he suddenly feels that the sky is wide and the earth is wide, and he feels at ease.

She walked briskly, pointed to the front, and shouted: "Let's go, Miss Liu, we are almost there."

After speaking, speed up the pace and go first.

Liu Yanhan was behind, looking tenderly at the Miss He's who acted unexpectedly and occasionally a little naughty in front of her, and followed quickly.

……

……

Winter goes to spring and the weather gets warmer.

After a winter's recuperation, He Qingqing's body was fine.

After the Qingming Festival, Liu Yanhan took He Qingqing back to Xinyi Valley of Linfeng Mountain according to the previous discussion with He Yuanwai, and asked his master Hemei Doctor Sage for a face-to-face consultation.

However, Yuanwai He is worried about his precious daughter going on a long journey alone.

No matter how He Qingqing refused to be accompanied, she resolutely prepared carriages and horses, packed her bags, and together with Mrs. He, Housekeeper Li, and maid Xiaoyan accompanied them on the road.