fictional spring

A few days after that, the drug seller came to bid me farewell, and when the maid came to tell me about it, the Miko happened to be by my side, so she came to the hall with me.

The drug seller has been waiting here for a long time.

I don't know if it was my illusion, but when Miko appeared in front of the medicine seller, the medicine seller's expression seemed to change, but he quickly covered it up before I caught it.

It's as if...they also know each other.

I was stunned, and subconsciously turned my face to look at Miko-sama's face, but I only saw that beautiful face covered with gloom—as if I saw something extremely unpleasant.

I don't quite understand why this happens.

Still staring at her side face, I reached out and touched the back of Miko-sama's hand, and then she restrained the expression on her face as if she had just woken up from a dream, and then turned her face to look at me calmly: "What's the matter?" ?”

It was as if what I had just seen was just an illusion.

I hesitated for a moment, and finally replied: "Nothing."

As if he didn't notice the small gestures between us, Yaolang stood quietly at the door and waited for us to approach before saying hello to me.

It seemed that he really just wanted to say goodbye to me. The drug seller didn't say a word, and he didn't hesitate. Even when I asked him to stay because of my concern about the weather, he refused without hesitation.

But now it is snowing.

The thick clouds blocked the sun's rays tightly, and failed to cast half of the sunlight—this is why the Miko-sama came out of the yard with me.

In fact, there are traces of snow on the ground, and judging from the current weather conditions, there may be no signs of clearing up in the next few days.

"Are you really going to leave at this time?"

Out of consideration for his safety, I couldn't help asking again: "If it snows all the time, it won't be easy to walk, right?"

Even though I asked like this, the drug seller's expression still didn't change much, he still nodded and said to me: "I've been bothering you a lot in recent days."

Without stopping, after saying this, the medicine seller left the city lord's mansion with his medicine box on his back like he did when he came. I looked at his back as he walked away slowly, and looked away.

But when I shifted my gaze to the people around me, I saw that Miko was looking at the direction where the medicine seller left, narrowing her blood-colored eyes, wondering what she was thinking.

I put my finger into her palm, "what's wrong with you?"

At this time, there was no one else, so there was no need to worry about what to say to her: "Your face has become strange since the maid came and told me Yaolang was leaving."

Hearing this, the Miko closed her eyes and said, "I'm fine now."

I don't quite believe it, I still stare at her.

"It's really nothing."

Miko-sama even smiled in front of me in a consoling manner, as if she really didn't intend to say anything more to me.

That being the case, I don't need to ask any further.Then I returned to the room with Miko-sama, soaking myself in the temperature generated when the charcoal fire ignited.

Probably because of me, there is always a charcoal fire burning in Miko-sama's room, so every time I go there, what I feel is always warm.

Although there are only some minor changes, for us, it is more like a silent conversation. Miko is telling me with her actions that she treats me with the same seriousness and care.

But this rapport only lasted a few days.

The fine snow fell gently on the ground, the cherry trees in the courtyard were already covered with hoarfrost, and the ground was covered with pure white snow. My mother suddenly came to my room.

Carrying the chill from outside the door, she took off her coat at the door and dissipated the chill from her body by the brazier before coming to me.

"Muyue." My mother sat down in front of me, gently folded her palms on her lap, with a soft expression on her face: "I have something to tell you."

Seeing her showing such a rare, even nervous and excited expression, I couldn't help being a little curious: "What is it?"

After all, it's been a long time since my mother showed any emotions other than sadness in front of me—no matter how much she concealed on the outside, she couldn't hide the true thoughts hidden in her heart.

I am genuinely happy that she has changed.

After I asked like this, the mother did not speak immediately, but looked at my hand, and reached out to hold the back of my hand.

Unlike my fingertips, which have been difficult to warm up all year round, my mother's palm is very warm, and the temperature that does not belong to me is transmitted from another person's skin, which makes me a little dazed.

It has been too long since I have held the palm of someone other than Miko-sama—the warmth from her palm is completely opposite to Miko-sama's cold palm.

Mother paused, as if she was thinking about how to speak, and after a while, she said as if she had made up her mind: "You have also reached the age of marriage..."

I thought that my mother was worried about my physical condition again, but usually when she said such words, she was definitely full of pity and sadness.

But I couldn't feel this from her at this time.

After careful consideration, it can be found that when the mother said this sentence, she seemed to have more hesitation and hesitation.

Thinking about it from another angle, it seems that there is a hint of relief mixed with hesitation.

Too complex to describe in words.

And this is obviously an extremely unusual performance for the mother.

I didn't urge her, and I didn't guess anything, I just waited for her next article.

My mother raised her eyes to look at me, and suddenly said: "Your father promised a marriage for you."

"..."

I was unable to speak.

The moment this sentence fell into the ears, it even made people wonder whether they heard the wrong voice, but the expression of the mother in sight did not seem to be fake, that is to say... it was indeed the truth.

She said that my lord father arranged a marriage for me.

but--

"why?"

I do not understand.

Why such a decision all of a sudden?

I was even prepared for this day not to come, although it didn't make much difference to me whether it did or not.

Obviously, I had this idea before—my father and my mother hoped to see the day when I got married, so they happily selected a suitable partner for me, but after trying to get along with those people for a while, in the end The results are nothing.

It's not just about the other person's opinion - there have been times when people say no because they can't accept my physical condition.

But more often than not, there are fathers and mothers who think that I don't seem to be interested in those people, so they finally rejected those things for me.

But now my lord mother suddenly told me that my lord father has arranged a marriage for me?

This kind of thing is too unexpected.

Even if it's me, I can't turn the corner for a while.

My mother obviously expected that I would ask this question, as if she had prepared for it, she held my palm tightly and explained to me: "This time is different from the past."

I am a little puzzled.

The mother continued: "The other party is a nobleman in Kyoto. Because I met you by chance a long time ago, I can't forget it all the time, and I even became ill because of it. That's why he sent an attendant to tell us that he hopes to marry you. .”

After hearing this, I suddenly understood what my mother was thinking.

Most of the people I've seen before have been in good health, and at worst have been thin from lack of exercise, which is quite different from the weak and sickly condition I was born with.

but……

This time the situation is more special than ever.

The so-called "marriage" that my mother told me this time, the other party is also in a similar situation to me.

He has a body that is also weakened by the disease.

I can't figure out exactly what my father thinks at this time, but my mother's idea is very simple - in her opinion, as long as it is something that she thinks can make me "happy", she will do everything for her without hesitation. can.

I am very grateful for my mother's love for me, and I am also very grateful for the waka sent by that noble son who I don't remember when I met, but——

I don't have that in mind.

If my mother had come to tell me a few months ago that I was going to marry in Kyoto, I would never have thought anything about it—going from one place to another is actually no big deal.

At that time, I must have thought like this, then nodded in agreement with the decision my mother told me, and quietly waited for that day to come.

However, at this time, I suddenly wanted to refuse.

Because I don't want to leave.

It's not that he doesn't want to leave this city, nor does it mean that he doesn't want to leave his courtyard, and it's not that he doesn't want to leave the side of his father and mother.

Rather... I made a promise with Miko that we will stay here forever.

And Miko-sama has always kept this promise.

I have never rejected or refuted any decision made by my mother before, and I have never questioned any word they said to me, but now, I asked her: "Does it have to be like this?"

My mother probably didn't hear the hesitation and resistance in my words, she just nodded with a slight smile on her face.

She touched my cheek, and asked: "Does Mutsuki want to wear my Shiro Mugou at that time, or do I have to find someone else to do it again?"

She thought much more than I did, and in much more detail.

My mother doesn't even need any answer from me, she can tell herself: "It's better to make another new one? There are also many skilled tailors in the city, let's go and have a look... No, let them all bring fabrics Come here, I happen to make some more clothes for you..."

No intention of stopping at all.

Mother even started to think about the details of the ceremony, as if she hadn't thought about it at all - I haven't even nodded to agree to this marriage.

"Mother."

I called her and interrupted her soliloquy.

"I do not want."

My mother froze for a moment, as if she didn't understand what I was saying, she opened her eyes wide and asked me, "Muyue?"

Before I could continue to speak, she started rambling again: "Although there was nothing wrong with my Bai Wugou back then, I still feel that I should give it to you..."

Mother completely misunderstood what I meant.

"What I'm saying is, I don't want to get married."

I held her hand and said to her word by word: "I don't want this marriage."

Hearing this, my mother showed a look of astonishment, as if she never thought that I would say such a thing at all, the expression on her face changed several times, and finally she was still unbelievable.

"Why do you say that all of a sudden?"

After a while, the silence in the room lasted for a long time, and the mother finally broke the weird silence: "Is there anything wrong with this?"

I pursed my lips and said nothing, just leaned against my head.

Mother's voice became much lower: "I thought you would be happy, Mutsuki, why don't you want to? Is it because you don't want to leave the city, or because you already have..."

Speaking of this, the voice of the mother stopped abruptly. She seemed to have noticed something strange, but she didn't say it, but changed the topic without leaving a trace.

"But your father has agreed to the other party and even set a date for you. As long as the weather warms up after the Spring Festival, you can..."

Hearing this, I was suddenly stunned.

Spring Festival...?

Waiting for the Spring Festival to get married or something, I always feel... It seems that at some point earlier or later, someone once said this to me.

I suddenly felt that it didn't matter if I agreed like this.It can even be said that I vaguely hope that that day will come.

Rather than saying that I was looking forward to meeting that person, it would be better to say that I was just looking forward to the arrival of that time.

The reason is also very simple - the so-called Spring Festival seems to be more important than the agreement between me and Miko-sama.

It was as if I had made an agreement with someone else at some other time—it was an agreement to get married after the Spring Festival.

I just thought of Miko-sama, but I fell silent again. I didn't raise my face to see what my mother's expression was like at this time, but I just reasoned that I was not feeling well, so I asked my mother to leave my room for the time being.

And the reason for needing to find such an excuse is also very simple——

I went to Miko-sama and told about it.

Tell her that my lord father has arranged a marriage for me, and even the date has been fixed.

I added with some hesitation: "Mother just told me about this today."

The priestess sitting in front of me lowered her head, and her expression became dim due to the shadow cast when she lowered her head. Seeing that she didn't respond for a long time, I was about to say something more, but I heard a question.

"Did you promise?"

I touched the hem of my clothes unnaturally, but didn't speak.

Miko-sama, who was unable to hear the answer, suddenly raised her face, and blood-colored pupils had already stood up in her red plum-colored eyes. I don't know if it was my illusion, but I felt that Miko-sama's appearance at this time was particularly dangerous.

As if questioning, she said, "So you're getting married, right?"

When she asked me like this, I suddenly felt chills all over my body.

Although there was still fine snow falling in the courtyard outside, the charcoal fire was clearly burning in the room, and the warmth brought by the reddish fire light filled the room.

I said softly, "My lord father has already agreed."

Although it seems that everything will go according to my wishes on weekdays, in fact, I also know very well that the decisions made by my father are not driven by emotions like my mother.

He must have felt that doing so was the best choice, so he agreed to this marriage.

And as the father of the city lord, I can probably understand what he can think of.

In fact, my mother only came to inform me of the outcome of the matter, even if I told her that I had no intention in this regard, she would still think that I just suddenly lost my temper under the few words of my father.

How they think has nothing to do with me, and my thoughts will not be changed because of their thoughts. I want to tell Miko-sama right away, just because I want to ask her a question .

"Would you like to come with me?"

I heard that Miko was stunned for a moment, and before she realized it, I continued to explain: "Although it is a bit impolite to say this, it is the best way I can think of..."

"Let's go together."

Miko-sama suddenly grasped my hand and said to me, "Let's leave here together."

I couldn't take precautions for a while, and was taken aback by her sudden approach. I leaned back a little, but was pulled back by the witch.

That pair of cool hands held my palm, and the beautiful maiden smiled softly, even Hongmei's eyes brightened a bit.

At this time, Miko-sama's expression did not reveal the gloom and gloom just now, but instead she felt a sense of joy and joy.

Seeing this, I couldn't help laughing, and said to her: "Then I'll go and tell my mother, and when I get married, the witch will leave the city with me."

"But I'm afraid I will wrong you a little bit, I can only let you accompany me as a maid..."

Before the words fell, Miko-sama's complexion changed a few times, and the way she watched me was unreasonably strange, making people swallow the rest of the words silently.

She didn't speak, and during the silence, a solemn atmosphere spread between us, and the air seemed to condense like jelly.

I suddenly understood something.

Perhaps Miko-sama's thinking—her understanding after hearing me say "Leave together" is probably not the same as what I mean when I say this sentence.

Miko-sama wants to leave with me, to a place I don't know where—this is what she understands.

But what I want is to take her to Kyoto together.

Miko-sama is from Kyoto, so I wanted to tentatively ask her if she would go with me, but I didn't think that Miko-sama would misunderstand me.

At this time, trying to explain something makes it even more difficult for both parties to speak, but I think it is better to say something.

So I asked her, "Where do you want to take me?"

Perhaps for Miko-sama, traveling around is a very interesting thing, but we all know that my physical condition is not strong enough to support a longer walk—not to mention sometimes unpredictable weather factors... just a little The wind and rain are enough to break my body.

Hearing that the Miko was still frowning, she was silent for a while before seeming to think clearly: "You can go wherever you want."

I was startled, looking at her serious expression, suddenly I didn't know what to say.

But——there was only a blank in my head.

No thoughts, no thoughts to be seen.

"I do not know."

There was no place I had to go or something I had to do—that was the way it should be.

From before, I felt that there was not much difference in everything, but when Miko-sama appeared in front of me, my eyes fell on her uncontrollably.

Along with it, my heart fell.

Her every move, every frown and smile are enough to tug at my heartstrings, and my only wish is not to be separated from Miko-sama because of this.

If the day of parting between us really comes, it shouldn't be because of this reason——because I want to marry and go to Kyoto.

Even if it's because...my body is not strong enough for me to stay by her side, it's far better than the last reason.

Hearing that, the Miko paused for a moment, then suddenly asked me again: "Are you really willing to marry that person?"

Although I don't quite understand why Miko-sama asked such a question, I nodded my head when faced with this question.

This is indeed a true thought. If you don't need to consider the factor of breaking up with the Miko, then it doesn't matter whether you marry or not.

In fact, when she saw me nodding her head, Miko-sama's face was already ugly enough, but as if she still didn't give up, she continued to ask me: "Does it have to be that person?"

I actually don't know what the purpose of asking so stubbornly is, but my thoughts at this time are very clear.

That one didn't leave the slightest impression in my memory, and I only learned about it from my mother today. I don't even know the person's age, appearance and name at all.

Do I have to marry that person?

Naturally not.

So I shook my head and told the truth: "Actually, it's almost the same to marry anyone, it's just because my father agreed to my marriage contract with that person."

It's just that I care more about "time" than "marriage contract".

It is the "Spring Festival" that seems to have left some traces in my heart.

And these words in my heart, I couldn't say them at all.

Hearing this, the Miko seemed to understand something, pursed her lips and turned her head away, looked in the direction of the barrier door, and suddenly said to me: "Do you want to listen to the pipa?"

I don't quite understand this sudden turning point. It seems that just a second ago, the relationship will break down again or the end of being unable to get along like before, but Miko-sama is rarely angry.

This didn't seem like her normal reaction, so I looked at her with a little trance.

Seeing this, Miko-sama stood up under my gaze, and told me to wait for her here for a while, and she went to my room to get a lute.

I nodded and watched as she pushed the door open and closed it again, leaving me alone in the room.

It's a bit strange to say, I always feel... It seems that the time it took for Miko to fetch things from my room this time is longer than usual?