fictional spring

In the past, we also stayed together until later, sitting in a spacious and quiet room and looking at the bright moon in the sky. The brilliance of the moonlight fell on Miko-sama's face, casting light shadows under her eyes.

When I occasionally lose my mind because of staring at her for too long, Miko always shows a faint smile - she doesn't hate my gaze, nor does she hate being with me.

So what the Miko said just now can only explain—the Miko-sama at this time doesn't seem to want to stay here and talk to me any longer.

Although I couldn't find out what the name of the piece was, I actually had the tune in my mind and wanted to play it tonight, but a moment after Miko-sama left, the maid came in and asked me if I wanted to play it. Put away the pipa.

The dim candlelight scattered on the mysterious elephant, I glanced at it, then raised my face to look at the expressionless face of the maid under the candlelight, and replied softly: "Put it away."

When I woke up the next day, it was already dawn, and my mother rarely came to my yard. Perhaps it was because I hadn’t seen her for a long time, so her mood had calmed down a lot. A gentle smile came out.

After I whispered hello, she raised her face and looked at my room, and the maids who came with her exited the Japanese room, and when they left, they did not forget to close the barrier door sympathetically.

Only my mother and I were left in the room. This kind of solitude is actually very common, but this time, I read something unusual from my mother's eyes.

The silence caused by not saying a word spread between us, like a mist in the air, and the mother sitting in front of me showed a look of hesitation.

"... Muyue," seemed to be thinking for a long time before my mother spoke slowly. The tone of calling my name was a little hesitant, and the words she said also had a hint of hesitation: "Recently...do you feel better?"

I was silent for a moment.

My physical condition has always been like this, and the doctors have said that if it is not a miracle, recovery is just a dream.

My mother is also very aware of my situation, so I would ask this kind of question... After all, it is just to make my heart feel better.

and so--

"It's much better." That's all I need to answer.

I just need to tell her the answers she wants to hear.

"Otherwise, you can ask Riko. Recently, I often go to the courtyard with Miko-sama to breathe, so you don't have to worry about it."

Hearing that my mother's face showed a bit of joy, she seemed to be really happy for my "recovery".

"If that's the case, let Miko-sama stay longer." Mother touched my cheek, stared at my face for a while, and said on a whim, "Muzuki must like her very much."

The expression on my face froze immediately.

This sentence came a bit suddenly, and it was not like my mother's usual style. I was used to her self-deceiving words, and I was also used to following her heart to agree with her. With an overly serious and affirmative tone, he couldn't help being a little dazed.

It didn't seem like something she'd say.

I have always felt that my mother is too naive and blind, whether it is father, me, or other people in the city, she has never been able to see anyone clearly.

It was not because I felt dissatisfied with her that I felt this way. On the contrary, I never had any opinion about my mother, nor did I make any judgments about what she did.

I just don't think it's necessary to do this.

But my mother thought differently than I did—she wanted to be a part of my life, and she wanted to be a part of my relationships.

When she said this, the mother's expression was extremely gentle. It was not the usual deliberately created gesture, but she was happy for me from the bottom of her heart.

"I can see it," my mother said to me, "When Mutsuki mentioned her, it felt completely different from talking about other people."

I opened my mouth, my expression was probably a little stunned, "...Really."

It is said that my mother lowered her eyelids, probably remembering the past - after she knew what the maids thought of me a long time ago, she brought me a girl of similar age.

It was a thin and small girl, quietly and silently following behind her mother. When I sat in the bedding and looked at her, all I could see was the tops of withered, yellow and rough hair...and not covered by clothes. where the thin skin was exposed.

My mother's idea is also very simple. She hopes that I can only sit in the room all day to be happier. She thinks that if I have "friends" of similar age to accompany me, maybe I will not look so lonely.

I don’t really remember what I was thinking at that time, but I still remember that my mother gently pushed the skinny child in front of me and said to me: “Muyue, please give her a name?”

For reasons I don't quite understand myself, at that point, I declined her offer.

He didn't say this outright, but told his mother in a coquettish tone, hoping that she would take the name.

That is the origin of the name of my current personal maid "Lizi" - that is the name given to her by my mother herself, because I can only be in the room, so my mother hopes that she can always stay with me inside.

But at that time, I seemed to see traces of something connected together from them.

——That is the so-called "curse".

Li Zi, who is bound by the curse, has always performed his duties very well, and has been by my side to take care of me with all his heart.

But the effect Lizi had on me disappointed my mother—we didn't become friends, nor did my relationship become as close as my mother imagined.

Perhaps it is also because of this that my mother is particularly persistent in this aspect.

——Out of selfish reasons that are unclear, she hoped that I could have "friends".

And now, that "friend" is only one courtyard away from me.

"If it is a very important friend, then you must get along well, cherish every moment you can be with each other, and keep those important memories firmly in your heart."

Mother said while holding my hand.

Her eyes were full of complex expressions, and it took a long time before she continued: "After all, it's also the first time for me...to see someone you care about from the bottom of my heart."

I subconsciously opened my eyes and looked at her.

At this time, I should actually say some comforting words to her, but my voice seemed to be blocked by something, so I could only watch my mother leave my yard with her maid as she did when she came.

I opened the barrier door that was closed when they left. I was sitting at the door, but my eyes fell on the opposite barrier door through the courtyard. Holding it, he knocked on Miko-sama's door.

It's not that I haven't been to Miko-sama's room before, but it was after nightfall, and it happened after Miko-sama opened the barrier on her own initiative.

I communicated with her through the courtyard, and after seeing that she had no intention of leaving, I took the initiative to get up and go to her room.But a day like this...

I've never been here.

"come in."

Just when I was thinking wildly, a soft female voice suddenly came from inside. I carefully pushed open the barrier door and stepped into the room.

It is now approaching noon, which is the time when the sun is at its hottest. The sun shines on the tatami mats through the thin shoji, and is cut into flat blocks by the door frame.

It was completely different from the scene I saw with candlelight in the room when I came here at night. At that time, there was only a small fire in the room. Miko-sama knelt in a corner where no sun could be seen, and raised her eyelids to look at me. .

"What's the matter with you?" She looked at me and asked softly.

Looking at the indifferent face, I suddenly felt that I was probably a little timid at this moment - the chill that came from nowhere seemed to invade the whole body in an instant, and even the mind became dull.

But the movements of my body were far faster than the thoughts in my mind. After I reacted, I realized that I had already sat down in front of Miko.

Miko-sama raised her eyebrows, but she didn't express any opinion on it. Instead, she seemed to acquiesce, turning a blind eye to my rude behavior.

I hugged Xuanxiang tightly in my arms: "The piece you played last night..."

"I forgot."

She interrupted me abruptly, and still glanced at me expressionlessly: "It's just a trivial matter, so I forgot about it."

"...That's it."

While the feeling of frustration and loss welled up from the bottom of my heart, it seemed to be mixed with some vague and strange feelings, like anger and sadness, and I didn't even dare to look at Miko-sama anymore.

But I still remember the real purpose of my coming here.

After the initial strong emotions faded, I played the piece she played last night in front of Miko, and when I was able to raise my face to look at her again, I saw that Miko was wrinkled. brow.

"What's wrong with you?" I lowered my voice subconsciously, and said with some hesitation: "You don't seem to be looking well?"

Hearing that the Miko seemed to have just realized that her expression was not quite right at this time, she raised her sleeve to cover her chin, and then returned to her original appearance when she put her hand down.

"excuse me."

she says.

But from this sentence, I can hear the feeling that she doesn't belong to her - and it seems that she is deliberately imitating someone again.

Unknowingly, my gaze stayed on her face for too long, and the more I looked at it, the more I could find some clues. Under Miko's eyes, which became a little puzzled, I touched her cheek and said: " Your appearance..."

She suddenly narrowed her pupils, and her body became visibly stiff.

I said, "It seems a little familiar."

"..." Miko was silent for a moment, raised her hand to hold the back of my hand, but didn't take it off.

Her skin was too cold, those blue blood vessels were winding under the plain white skin, but they couldn't create any warmth for the body.

Although it is indeed a bit too much to say this, she really feels like some kind of existence other than human beings to me.