my sick white moonlight

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After Zhang Youming almost returned to normal, Shi Zhiqing rushed back to the hospital. He originally wanted to contact Dr. An to inquire about Zhang Youming's situation.

But at the door of the consultation room, Shi Zhiqing hesitated.

Forget it after thinking about it, without Zhang Youming's consent, it was a waste of time in the end.

"Doctor Shi, why are you here?" Doctor An just got off work and was going to the duty room to change clothes

When she saw Shi Zhiqing, she thought of Zhang Youming. According to her, Zhang Youming had some mental problems.

Kind and sensitive, taciturn, Zhang Youming is like this in her eyes.

In fact, she more or less guessed that Shi Zhiqing and Zhang Youming had an unusual relationship, Zhang Youming and Shi Zhiqing were obviously not equal.

Due to professionalism, she can't freely ask about other people's private affairs, let alone intervene, but she also sincerely hopes that people like Zhang Youming will not be hurt.

After Shi Zhiqing was stopped, he stood there for a few seconds before walking towards Dr. An and saying, "Are you off work?"

"Hmm, what's the matter?" Dr. An squeezed a little hand sanitizer hanging on the railing in the corridor, and the smell of alcohol rushed into her nostrils, and she said again: "Hey, you and Xiaozhang, I just asked , is he okay recently?"

It's more comfortable to talk to someone like Dr. An. She can immediately convey the information she wants to give without making people feel impolite.

Shi Zhiqing shook her head and said, "It's not very good."

Seeing that Dr. An was frowning, Shi Zhiqing added: "He's still sick today, oh, that's what I told you last time, his body hurts. But... But after I went there, he'll be fine if he sees me, I'll I just want to..."

Dr. An nodded and said, "Are you having a conflict?"

Shi Zhiqing was silent for two seconds, sighed, and said, "It's a long story, do you have any plans for the future? Let's have dinner together."

"Yes." Dr. An nodded, "Wait for a few minutes, and I'll go change."

Shi Zhiqing found a quiet tea restaurant, after ordering the dishes, he seemed a little cramped, sitting on the seat, and was refilling tea and delivering water.

"Xiaoshi, don't be so cautious. Since you want to tell me about this, just rest assured that it's okay, just treat me as a normal friend." Seeing that Shi Zhiqing was a little nervous, Dr. An relieved her.

In fact, Shi Zhiqing is quite normal to be nervous, but they all belong to the same hospital, so if she wanted to speak her mind, she would definitely be worried.

Shi Zhiqing took a sip of tea and said, "That's right. Zhang Youming and I have known each other since junior high school, and we have a good relationship. His legs became like that because he saved my mother. We didn't sign up for the college entrance examination together." , He dropped out of college not long after he was in college, and then we lost contact, and we only got in touch the year before last. Oh, I have to start from the beginning, don't you mind?"

"I don't mind, you say."

"However, I can't remember a lot of them. Most of them were told by others. Do you remember that I was hospitalized a while ago? It's strange to say that after being beaten that time, I actually forgot about Zhang Youming and the things related to him. Things." Shi Zhiqing explained.

This is more complicated than Dr. An imagined. It seems that Zhang Youming's problem is not the only one.

"Yeah, keep talking."

At this time, the soup was served, and Shi Zhiqing made another bowl of soup for Dr. An.

"We were in a relationship before. After I forgot about him, I met him again and fell in love at first sight. I know this is a bit outrageous. But my sister told me that I was dumped by him, and we also had entanglements in the previous generation."

Dr. An thought to himself, this is very typical, if it is not messy to cut, it will still be messy.

"My mother fell from the building. A large part of the reason was guilt. Zhang Youming's parents died in a car accident. They were in the same car as my father. My mother knew the car was broken, but she didn't tell them."

"Your father is here?" Dr. An was surprised.

Shi Zhiqing nodded, and said: "That's right, my mother loves and hates my father. My father cheated, and the younger sister I'm talking about was also born to him later. At that time they were in the jade business, and they still had a large number of My mother took over everything later. My mother fell from the building. Zhang Youming confirmed with him the car accident the day before, and Zhang Youming also told me the truth. He said that he was the fuse of my mother's fall. .”

No wonder he would feel guilty towards Zhang Youming, which is equivalent to saying that he would not save other people's parents, but his own life was given by others. Dr. An thought about it, and the grievance was deep.

It's fine if ordinary people don't interact with each other, but Zhang Youming and Shi Zhiqing do have feelings now, and this relationship is not ordinary, so it's even more troublesome, mainly because of the moral level of emotion, which can't be justified.

"Then what do you think now?" Dr. An asked, seeing that Shi Zhiqing was hesitant, Dr. An said again, "Don't worry, just treat me as a trash can, I won't contemptuously condemn you, of course, Doesn't elevate your relationship, what you need now is, a trash can, and now I am."

"I like him very much. If my guess is right, I should have liked him since high school. For so many years, I have never had someone else, no, I had an immature love." Shi Zhiqing recalled.

"High school? How did you know for sure?"

"I looked through my books in high school, and basically every book has his name on it, and some blank pages are even full of his name, which is my handwriting." Shi Zhiqing laughed, expressing her love at that time The way is indeed very subtle.

I wrote your name ten thousand times, but I dare not say I like you.

"As you know, I am a very cautious person."

"Yeah, all surgeons are bold and careful." Doctor An said with a smile.

Shi Zhiqing also laughed, seeming to relax.

"Since I became an adult, I have hardly had close contact with people. I mean that aspect, and I basically solve it by myself, but I always dream, more than once I dream of having sex with Zhang Youming, and I am disappointed after waking up. I don't know if I used to be like that, but lately, almost every day."

"This is normal, you are too depressed. You are in your 30s." Dr. Ann said.

"I really want to be with Zhang Youming now, very urgently, but I heard other people describe him, that is, another friend of mine, my sister, and...well, it can be considered an ex-boyfriend, they all Said, Zhang Youming was very indifferent to me before, I don’t know if he accepts me now, does he have other ideas.”

"Ex-boyfriend?" Doctor An asked.

Shi Zhiqing nodded, and said: "Well, according to his description, I fell in love with Zhang Youming because I was angry with Zhang Youming, or because I got Zhang Youming's attention. Oh, and there are high school classmates, she said In front of me, Zhang Youming will have a strong self-esteem, and occasionally he will say some weird words, but most of them are self-deprecating, and basically related to his legs."

"Speaking of which, after getting in touch again, besides liking him, I still feel sorry for him, even though he is silent and not good at speaking, and he is a bit awkward." Shi Zhiqing recalled the day when she asked him if he wanted to visit him in the shop, but Zhang Youming didn't reply. .

"I remember a literary film that said that a person will like many people in his life, but there is only one who loves him dearly."

Shi Zhiqing smiled wryly, and said, "I don't even like many people."