That 1 his waist protruded

55

"After marriage, he came home on time for more than half a year. The good times didn't last long, and soon he returned to the original state. Only me and this stepmother were left at home. I thought that the relationship between me and her was at most that we didn't want to see each other. "

"I thought" marked the turning point.I know what happened next, but they don't.It's rare for Zhang Qiushu to talk about himself, and these people are very curious.

"But then, when she made sure my dad wasn't coming home, she climbed into my bed in her pajamas at night and kissed me awake. I just felt my stomach churning, rushed to the bathroom and vomited for a long time, and only a little sour came out. water."

Under the table, I held Zhang Qiushu's hand.

His almost strict moral standards, and his obsessive-compulsive disorder that resists most people's touch, all started from this time.

I saw Zhang Qiushu's teeth trembling, he held his face and turned to me and pecked his lips, "It's all right, relax, it's all right..."

I heard Su Hefeng muttering in a low voice: "This sudden dog food."

Zhang Qiushu picked the key points here. He told me in more detail before.Including his little mother wearing sexy pajamas in front of him, casually entering his room to look through his things, deliberately sleeping on his bed and waiting for him to come back from self-study next night...

If I ever had the urge to kill someone before rushing into the sewer in this life, it was only this woman.

At that time, Zhang Qiushu was only sixteen or seventeen years old. He had just discovered that he liked men, not to mention being comforted and guided correctly. There was no one in the family who could talk, and the confusion and depression of adolescence were more serious than ordinary people.

What's more, Zhang Qiushu is still the type of love for a long time, and it is very likely that he still has a crush on a friend around him. This feeling can only be expressed in peace of mind.

Even if an adolescent child looks like an adult, he is still a child. The resources in his hands and the world he can see with his eyes are very limited.Before he could get through the darkest days and see the light and hope, everything was ruined.

What that woman did was enough to destroy his world.

56

Later Zhang Qiushu moved to live on campus.Then his father divorced again.

After graduating from university, Zhang Qiushu completely moved out of the family, and basically did not contact him, and did not touch the money his father sent him.He works hard enough and is good enough to make a living in this world by himself.

I just don't know how to make him recognize himself, that he is good, needed, and worthy of love.He is not alone, he can have lovers, family, friends.He may even be less gentlemanly and considerate.

Said that happiness is too ethereal, I hope he is happy.

57

As if the reminiscence of the past came to an end like a tragic meeting, Su Hefeng looked like he was choking on dog food.

Poe sat obediently, trying to hide his envy by eating with his head down.However, he couldn't eat much, so he just moved the things on his plate back and forth.

Deng You obviously wasn't going to let me go. I comforted Zhang Qiushu and saw him lip-syncing with me: "It's your turn."

Fine.But I really feel like I have nothing special to say compared to everyone here.

"My parents are also divorced. My family is in a small city. My father went out to work to earn more money, and my mother and I were at home. Later, probably because my father was not at home, they divorced."

"There was nothing strange or bloody during this period. My father still often went out, and I usually ran between my father's house and my mother's house. After a few years, they used the banner of their children again. Make do with the remarriage."

"Compared to the environment where I grew up, in fact, I am not inferior in material terms. My father went out to work for the better living conditions of our father and father. It's just that they missed my growth."

I tried to put it lightly.

"Perhaps this is the case for most families. It is enough to do as well as possible materially. I do not deny that my parents are very hardworking. Not only my dad, but also my mother is also very capable, selling shoes at the market For more than ten years, in the past few years, I am too old to rest at home, but I have changed to do other things."

"The choice we face is not a family that is rich but lacks companionship or a family that is poor but loves. Most of the time, what is really going on is a family that is poor and overwhelmed with no time to think about love."

"You may not be able to imagine that they work so hard, and their lifetime savings are only more than 30 yuan." I lowered my head and raised the corners of my mouth, "The total price of Berg's house should be 600 million yuan including the decoration?"

Zhang Qiushu nodded, "Well, with a down payment of 30.00%, you can basically rely on the provident fund to repay the mortgage."

"Look, it's really nothing. It's just an ordinary family bowing to reality." I smiled, "I don't have any bloody stories, and they are also fairly reliable parents. It's just that I will not marry and have children according to their expectations. child, so I was too guilty to go home.”

Deng You looked at me suspiciously.

Zhang Qiushu also looked sideways, "Then how did you get sick before?"

I got stuck.

Su Hefeng blinked his eyes, he was the latest person to know me besides Poe, and he didn't know that I had two severe depression and anxiety attacks.

I haven't told Zhang Qiushu about my medical history, but when my depression and anxiety relapsed because of him, I dealt with it too skillfully.He was so careful, it was impossible not to see it.

In fact, I am the kind of patient that psychiatrists hate.He is alert and has a certain reserve of professional knowledge. He is disobedient and good at refuting.Fortunately, I went to see a psychiatric department. The general process is to describe the condition, prescribe medicine, and pay for the medicine. There is no need to communicate with me.

"Actually, there's no special reason. It's just that I feel sorry for their expectations after I understand my sexual orientation, so I have been struggling between hating myself and reconciling with myself. Part of the factor is that my own personality is like this."

"I tried to test their attitudes. In my dad's eyes, sympathy is probably as heinous as rapists and drug abuse. In his view, even if it is murder, robbery, drug trafficking, and gangsters, although it is not the right way, as long as It is worthwhile to be able to make a name for yourself.”

"But he thinks that homosexuality is the kind that harms others and does not benefit oneself. It has no value or benefit and does not follow the right path."

Zhang Qiushu patted my hand, "Thank you for your hard work."

I grabbed him with my backhand, and put on a relaxed tone, "Thinking about it from another angle, it doesn't matter if I come out now. The economic foundation determines the status of the family. I am the richest person in my family now, and they don't care what I want to do."

Zhang Qiushu burst out laughing.

"Think about it, in fact, when I can't think about it, it's because my world is full of them, and I can't live without them."

"There is a picture in my mind that I can't get rid of. When the sun sets, the sun shines into the room. I haven't reached the age of elementary school, and I lie on the bed and watch TV waiting for them to go home. The TV is not good, and I am bored. Counting the patterns on the sheets. For many years, it was like I was stuck there, waiting for them to come back and see me."

Zhang Qiushu's hand was held by me, his hand was very warm, I could feel his palm a little wet.

When Zhang Qiushu started talking, they all stopped their chopsticks. Looking at the boiling hot pot, I couldn't help sighing: "It's all over the fire!"