i may be a bug

I hope those pigeons that were released don't come back.

——Tanikawa Kakutani

When I came back, I was a little miserable.

It doesn't matter to me that Osamu Dazai is the only one. After all, I knew it before I released so many pigeons, and he couldn't take revenge on me.

Because we are friends.

So when I see him falling down, I will fish for it, and when I see him soaking up black mud, I listen carefully, and by the way, I can relax my tired spirit after doing the questions.If he wants to alienate me, I will not pester him, and if he wants to get close to me, I will not refuse.

He doesn't have the keys to my house.

But he has a pair of hands that can open all the locks in Yokohama.

After finishing the assignments every day, I move my sore fingers, and when I look up, I can see Osamu Dazai who is about to fall out of the window, or Osamu Dazai who is hanging on a tree and trying to hang himself.

I am calm.

What surprised me was that once, he got stuck in the wall, so that the whole life was dark, and I laughed out loud.With the aggrieved expression of "I didn't expect you to be such Gu Chuan" on his face, he was rescued.

How did you rescue him?

Of course not a very good experience, for Osamu Dazai.I kicked the crack in the wall with one foot, and took the opportunity to drag Osamu Dazai out with one hand.

He lay on the ground and wrote me a miserable letter.

Afterwards, I asked Dazai how he got into that hole and got stuck. Dazai burst into tears: "I heard that the whole person can pass through the shoulder."

"I want to try where the legs can pass, and whether people can pass."

Osamu Dazai.

Every time I go out alone, when I come back, I always bring a Dazai Osamu who failed to commit suicide. He exudes a very resentful atmosphere, "Is there no way to commit suicide without any pain?"

I thought about it carefully.

"I can put you in a black hole."

Osamu Dazai was on the verge of tears: "Has Gu Chuan tired of me long ago?"

"I just think that you commit suicide like this every day, which increases my workload a bit. The day before yesterday you hanged yourself and then dislocated your neck. The day before yesterday you hung upside down from the beam of my house without turning on the light. I almost beat you to death. Yesterday you tried to hold yourself to death Empty my fridge myself, then went to the hospital with food poisoning and cost me a bunch of money."

I paused, and then I found out the bill I just received, "I wanted to freeze myself to death today, so I ate a bunch of ice cream so cold that I hugged me to keep warm, and I added a bunch of bills."

"My dear friend, what do you want me to do for you? I didn't take your ashes away. I already have true love for you."

Osamu Dazai opened his mouth, and said in a correct accent: "Topology!"

"what?"

"I want to learn topology!"

"?"

"I learned topology, plus abstract algebra, isn't that enough? If it's not enough, just use functions."

I think Osamu Dazai may dislike his hair too much.

"Why don't you study quantum mechanics?"

"As long as you want me to learn, I can do it."

Then the next day, he hugged me and said, "I was wrong, throw me into a black hole."

This friend looks like Yazi who plays too much.

The thing is, he was a Mafia back then, you know, the kind of Mafia that kills people and sets things on fire.It was completely different in front of his subordinates and in front of me. I had little experience at that time, and I was amazed by this kind of drama masters, and made a voice of "I want to learn".

Osamu Dazai stood up from the couch, "Just laugh at the slugs and you can learn."

He said it seriously, but I still know that his partner, the slug in his mouth, Mr. Nakahara Nakaya is much more eye-catching than a black mud like him.

"I don't want to defy gravity."

I'm serious.

"Your name is Newton."

In the end I solved his whimsy with an elbow.

With him as a partner, Zhongyuanzhong is also very hard.Because when I confessed that I had no money, Osamu Dazai came up with a whimsical idea. When he put a black card in front of me, I thought it was his salary. Pay back the money.

As a result, he said happily: "This is the bank card of the slug. Look, I stole the money from the slug to support you, isn't it interesting?!"

Zhongyuan Zhongye's wallet is probably hopeless.

Learning mathematics cannot save Osamu Dazai.

The last time I saw Osamu Dazai was at the hospital in Mafia. His body was covered with another layer of bandages, and his face was also a little bruised.

I really couldn't bear the blame in my heart for Yuan Zhong, so I reminded him aloud, "I didn't control my strength enough to squeeze it out."

"I'm talking about the body."

I was silent for a while, "Okay." I just squeezed my face.

When I was about to use my supernatural ability to make him feel better, he suddenly held my outstretched hand and winked, "If you want to comfort me, why don't you give me a kiss?"

Is that so?

"you sure?"

I only know that Osamu Dazai has a thick skin, but I don't know that he also has a thin skin. When I made a gesture to kiss, he took a step back.

Speaking of which, Osamu Dazai on the if line did not break away from Mafia in the end, and became Dazai wearing a sand-colored windbreaker.Because of him, I was brought into Mafia by him and started my experience as a member of Mafia for the first time.

how to say?

During the mission, Osamu Dazai, who can joke with me as a showman, will become a Mafia cadre with no bright eyes and oppressive force.

It's really good to be free of emotions.

I am particularly worried that I have no pressure, and more often I can only use a rigid expression to create a terrifying atmosphere.

Like laughing.

There's nothing scary about smiling, but when I punch someone or kill someone with a smile, it's stressful.

"It's okay to keep a straight face."

"Is it Dazai's request or the executive's order?"

"Is there a difference?"

"If it is Dazai, I will say no. If it is a cadre, I will say yes."

"Dazai is still different from a cadre."

In fact, there is no difference. My first friend, Osamu Dazai, will always be a boy in my eyes.Of course, he has no mercy when he uses me, because he knows that I will come back alive and bring back what he wants safe and sound.

I already had ace pigeon potential at that time.

I always wake up very late the next day after finishing the task, but I will pigeonhole any activities around [-] o'clock, and then I will get a gloomy Osamu Dazai.

The last time I dove him off, I was going to do the task of Mafia, he said to eat canned crab meat, I said "hmm" and added, "I want to eat tofu dishes."

Afterwards, they were all dropped by pigeons. Why don’t you understand that we didn’t come later?

That was the only mission I ever failed.

Osamu Dazai of the other IF line, what should I say?

Thank him.

It made me understand that not all Osamu Dazai belonged to the Osamu Dazai I knew, and made me treat all Osamu Dazai in the if line as strangers with the same face.There are memories that let me know parallel lines can be retrieved by chance.Just let me know, we won't be friends.

Variety.

Anyway, I don't know why Dazai Osamu here is crazy, but I'm not worried.Osamu Dazai, who was pigeonholed by me and did not retaliate against me, is my friend. If I am a friend, I don't have to be afraid at all.As for Osamu Dazai who is not a friend?

Do you think I'm scared?

After experiencing so many black muds, he was afraid that I would be more or less the same.

The best case scenario, of course, is that Osamu Dazai just said something ambiguous on a whim, making people think wildly.

But now it seems...

I put down the ochazuke in my hand with a heavy expression on my face, should he pay me back?Or should I pay back?

"Qingzi, shall we put a sack on him?"

"It's okay to sink Dongdongwan, Qingzi."

I looked at the two future great writers who were eager to try, and my eyebrows twitched: "Eat, don't think too much."

"Oh."

All three members of my family are supernatural beings.

Then I do not talk about it.

Dun is the beast under the moon, and Jiu Zuo is the hell of the brain.Pulling it out is always eye-catching, especially for Kusaku, whose spiritual superpowers are taboo.

I don't want my entire family to be Mafia.

The buff I put on them now is easily degaussed when they go to Mafia, that is Osamu Dazai.

There is one thing to be happy about at Mafia.I became Chuya Nakahara's subordinate again. For this reason, I can now be my own Aoko Sato, instead of returning to the identity of "Tanigawa-san" that Osamu Dazai said.

On the first day when he became a subordinate of Chuya Nakahara, he was reminded by Chuya Nakahara, "If Dazai tells you anything messy, just call me and don't be afraid."

The third number saved in my mobile phone belongs to Chuya Zhongyuan.

The fourth number belongs to Osamu Dazai.

I don't want to recall how much psychological shadow Atsushi and Kusaku felt when seeing the face of Osamu Dazai appearing outside the window of my house.I went out to rescue my boss, Osamu Dazai, from the tree after I had calmed them down.

He rubbed his neck, casually: "Oh, I failed again."

Those iris eyes looked at me, "Aoko Sato, where is your home?"

"Yes, Dazai-sama."

This is the level of officials crushing people to death.

He didn't come in, but said that I was very good, he liked me, and decided to let me accompany him on missions tomorrow.

Me: OK.

"Why don't you call Zhongya and talk about it?"

"Chuya seems to have told you that if I come to you and say something nonsense, I'll tell him."

I beg you Osamu Dazai, please spare Mafia's conscience.He's gone out on missions, and he's going to be mad at you.

I made a phone call, even if I'm not important, the two of them can argue over the phone.

Why am I so proficient?

Not because it happens too much.

As for the task?

have nothing to say.

In order not to let the cadres of Mafia die in front of me, or say that I would not save me after the fact, I put on small shoes, I dealt with the enemy as fast as possible.

No use.

If Osamu Dazai wants to die, I have to fish it out. Even if he sees Tsurumigawa on the road and goes down with a plop, I will go down with a plop to pick him up.

"Still nothing has changed."

"Master Dazai?"

"You look like my friend."

I met the legendary friend out of thin air in Osamu Dazai. He said that his friend is a person who only has friends in his heart. If he is not a friend, he will not pay too much attention.

"Even if I fell into the water in front of her, if I wasn't a friend, she would fish it out, but she wouldn't ask me what I had for dinner again."

"What do you think I should have for dinner?"