What a pity to miss the rebirth

"Where are you going?" Lin Mao reached out his hand helplessly to stop Li Xianghua, "Please think about my difficulties, do you think the boss just appointed me to watch you just for fun? Give me some face and bear with it. The boss loves you so much, he won't keep you locked up."

"Do you think I still have time?" Li Xianghua looked at him coldly, "Nifeng, tell the truth, did you already know the real reason why we came back this time?"

Lin Mao's face remained unchanged, and he said without blinking: "I came back with you, how could I know things that you don't even know?"

"You didn't lie to me?" Li Xianghua didn't trust him at all.

"How could I lie to you?" Lin Mao called Qu and said, "Didn't you see Shuang's face? He doesn't know either, okay? Teng, Kui, and Liushang are also on vacation like us. Look at their faces! And Sirius, Shui Lian, Gu Yue, Fan Xing, they have all stayed in the Mercenary City, do you think they know?"

"Then how can you be so calm?" Li Xianghua was still dubious.

"Which eye of yours sees me calm? Is my psychological quality better than yours?" Lin Mao slightly bent his lips, smiled gracefully, and patted him on the shoulder. Have you forgotten the advantages that are definitely stronger than you?"

In the past in Mercenary City, Lin Mao got the highest evaluation in every psychological quality test.

Li Xianghua looked at his expression for a while before saying: "Let me meet Liu Yingnian."

Lin Mao heheed twice, and said with a smile: "How do you see me? You can't leave the Mercenary City, and I can't snatch him from Shuang's hands. Tell me, how do you want to see me?"

Li Xianghua said with a sullen face: "I know, as long as you think about it, there is a way."

Lin Mao snorted twice with a half-smile, and said, "You think highly of me now. But it depends on the person, and it varies from person to person. It's okay for others, and you know Yu Heshuang's abilities. There's really nothing they can do."

It's not that he can't do it, it's that the opponent is too strong and he strikes rashly, the loss outweighs the gain.

Li Xianghua didn't say a word, and after a moment of silence, he said, "Shuang always has a solution."

Lin Mao smiled lazily, leaning against the wall, took out a cigarette from his pocket and handed it to Li Xianghua. I know that he is not someone who is not recognized by the six relatives. When you dominated Yu Helian back then, if you could think of how much love you have for Shuang today, maybe Shuang really has a way."

Li Xianghua paused with his hands, then turned on the ignition and lit the cigarette. "I didn't think about it so much when I was young. At that time, I thought it was a treasure to catch a little bit of warmth. Do you know why I have been with Liu Yingnian for ten years and have never thought of changing someone else? It was not the first time I saw him when I was 14 years old. To him. I saw him the day the couple who gave birth to me threw me away. I was only three years old. It was winter and there were so many people on the street, and he was the only one who gave me my scarf and gloves. He It is a light in my heart. I am willing to give my life to him."

Lin Mao glanced at him, "I never heard you mention it."

Li Xianghua said lightly: "I never thought of mentioning him to others. It's just a memory."

He took a puff of cigarette and said slowly: "If you haven't been hungry, you won't understand the feeling of being hungry. If you haven't been abandoned and hated, you won't understand what it's like to be afraid of being abandoned and hated again all the time. Yu He Lian's kindness to me is not something I can rely on to be pampered and proud, I don't want to let go of that warmth, because I am afraid that I will lose everything again." Li Xianghua's deep and calm star eyes were dark, "Maybe it is too much to say that. It was too cruel, but at that time, I was really not mature enough to consider Shuang's mood. It was even more impossible to take care of him and think about him."

What he didn't say is that what a person wants, there is always a price to pay, and no one gets something for nothing.He wanted Yu Helian's warmth, so he tried hard to get it.Before you want to get the warmth of others, you must first give your own warmth and kindness.Shuang wanted so much to get Yu's attention and Lian's love, but Shuang never took the initiative to fight for it. He didn't give anything, and would shrink back when encountering a little setback. He didn't even want to give others a smile. What else did he want?

Lin Mao also took a few puffs of cigarettes, and after exhaling the smoke, he asked, "You went to find Liu Yingnian after you left Mercenary City?"

Li Xianghua shook his head, "I didn't look for him, at least I didn't look for him on purpose. I met him once when I was on a mission, but I just took a look at him from a distance. I know that he and I are two different worlds. It's impossible to be friends with him."

Lin Mao chuckled, "You've always been sensible."

Li Xianghua took a deep puff of his cigarette, and said in a deep voice, "Liao's death touched me a lot. Life is too fragile, and it may disappear anytime, anywhere."

Lin Mao withdrew his smile and gave a faint "hmm".

Who is not?

No one can see relatives, friends or lovers die in front of their eyes, and remain indifferent.

Both were silent for a while.

After a while, Li Xianghua slowly said again: "I asked Yu to send me to school. Although Liu Yingnian was responsible for it, to be honest, I didn't think too much about it. It was purely an accident to meet him. His smile remained the same. Warm, eyes still bright. When he saw me, my heart felt like an electric shock, and at that moment I knew my heart was moving. I wanted him."

Lin Mao smiled, "It means that you have this kind of fate with him, so Xi Shi is in the eyes of the beholder, and you think he is good everywhere. You probably think he smells good when he farts. Look at me, I'm just telling the truth."

Li Xianghua also showed a faint smile, "You're right, in my heart, his farting is really delicious."

Lin Mao looked at him like a terminally ill patient, shook his head and said, "You are hopeless."

Li Xianghua smiled at him again, his smile was faint, his handsome face couldn't be seen clearly in the smog. "Hmm. The poisoning is too deep, at an advanced stage, and there is no cure."

……

Liu Yingnian felt a little strange.

Shuang, a puppy similar to her own, wanted to eat bones and barked twice. Although the owner was impatient and didn't like bones, he still bought them back—this sense of sight made Liu Yingnian very happy. Oops.

Obviously his original intention was to hope that Shuang would not pay too much attention to appearance, Shuang didn’t have any need to feel inferior, but this made it seem like he was complaining that there is no mirror here, and he can’t see himself every day, so he blows the pillow wind, It's like begging Shuang to buy a mirror.

He was embarrassed by his gorgeous illusion, but the problem is, Shuang seems to really think so.

"Did you think it was me who wanted to look in the mirror?" Liu Yingnian still couldn't hold back, and asked too much.

Shuang sat at the dining table drinking soup, and Liu Yingnian made himself a cup of hot milk by the way.

Milk is a good thing. Whether you are young or middle-aged and elderly, drinking more milk is good for your body. It can replenish calcium and soothe nerves. Drinking it before going to bed can also help you sleep.

"Isn't it?" Shuang glanced at Liu Yingnian, looked at his expression, and said after a few seconds of silence, "You want the mirror for me?"

Liu Yingnian looked away, and said embarrassingly: "You can't say that. I just think that no matter how much you mind, you are still you, and your name is Ji Shuang. It has nothing to do with your appearance. If you don't even If you don’t look in the mirror, you always feel that something is wrong. People have to learn to love themselves before they can be loved. Even if you don’t like yourself, how can others like you?”

After he finished speaking earnestly, he felt the surroundings were quiet, raised his eyes and looked forward, and Shuang was staring at him intently.

Liu Yingnian immediately realized that what he said was a bit too elderlike, and there was a bit of preaching in it, probably Shuang might not like to hear it.

"I said nonsense, if you don't like it, just pretend I didn't say it." He quickly added.

Shuang stared at him for a while before asking him, "Do I look like a narcissistic person?"

Liu Yingnian was puzzled, and returned him with questioning eyes.

"I don't like my appearance. I have felt inferior and hated it before, and I don't even want to see it." Shuang looked at him with the eyes of a fool, and said coldly: "But that was a long time ago. .I don’t have so much time to care about these every day. I have thought about it since I was an adult. The reason why there is no mirror in my place is that I don’t think this face is very good-looking, and the other is that I am used to not using mirrors. Is there any The mirror has no effect on me."

Liu Yingnian could only let out a "hmm" in a daze.

Thinking about it, a person like Shuang must have a mental capacity many times higher than that of ordinary people. It is probably considered serious when it happens to others, but what is it to him?

It's his meddling.

That's not how empathy floods work either.

Liu Yingnian thought about it, and thought it was probably because he lived with Shuang for a long time, so long that he forgot to keep the distance.

In fact, they haven't gotten to know each other well enough to have a heart-to-heart relationship.

Shuang got up from his seat and passed by Liu Yingnian with an empty bowl. He looked at Liu Yingnian's embarrassed face, and raised his hand to wipe off the milk stains on the man's lips.

"What good is learning to love yourself? If I like myself, will you like me?"

The emotionless voice grazed Liu Yingnian's ears, flowing like cold spring water.

Liu Yingnian turned around and watched Shuang walk to the pool, put the bowl into the pool, rinsed it with a rag, and then put it back into the cupboard.

Shuang's words were actually meaningless, it was just because Liu Yingnian's previous lecture-like words were very common rhetorical questions, and the reflex arc was a bit longer, but he didn't really want an answer, and he didn't really want Liu Yingnian to like him. .

Liu Yingnian even felt that Shuang's words were not meant for him.

But Shuang's calm tone without a trace of expectation, that indifferent tone as if stating objective reality, still made Liu Yingnian feel sympathy again after his heart stopped for two seconds.

"The person you like, doesn't he like you?"

Liu Yingnian regretted it after asking.He felt that it was a bit early to ask this question, and it was too late, Shuang's tolerance for him should not have reached this level, so he shouldn't ask it now.

What surprised him was that although Shuang's eyes became a bit cold, as cold as Siberian snow, she didn't mean to blame him.

Shuang just stood quietly for a while, and slowly faded the coldness in her eyes.

Then, when Liu Yingnian was still amazed by Shuang's change, Shuang walked up to him, lifted his chin, and kissed him, short and touching.

"I like him, but he doesn't like me. He's dead." Shuang looked into his eyes and asked him softly, "What else do you want to know?"