The white moonlight that makes us cry

In people's subconscious, people's sexuality and desire have always been in a suppressed state, and civilized rules such as social morality and legal system keep people's instinctive desires under rational control at all times. — Freud

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At six in the morning, Xia Rubing was awakened by a nightmare.

Panting, he sat up from the bed, opened the drawer, took out a bottle printed in German, poured out two pills, and swallowed them with cold water.

This is a psychological antihypertensive drug, and Xia Rubing has been taking it regularly for many years.

After taking the medicine, he leaned back on the head of the bed, dazed in a daze.

It's just dawn.

Everything is quiet all around.

In the early years, you could still hear the roar of motorcycles from speeding parties in the city, or the yelling of the morning market from the stalls downstairs.

Recently, with the stability of public security and urban management patrols, these voices have gradually disappeared.

Even the communities in the city center can allow the owners to sleep soundly, so the housing prices in the vicinity have risen again and again in the past two years, approaching sky-high prices.

When Xia Rubing decided to buy this house when he first returned to China, Xia Dang objected.

The older generation thinks this way, and thinks it is too risky for him to take on a huge mortgage when his job is just about to stabilize.

But now that the housing price has doubled by more than ten times, Xia Dang has repeatedly shown off his son's wise decision to get in a car with outsiders and relatives.

He is the pride of his father.

Xia Rubing understood this very well.

So when the accident happened that year, he didn't tell Xia Dang what happened to his body.

This kind of thing is really hard to say.

Mother died young.From adolescence to adulthood, Xia Rubing perfectly concealed her sexuality.

In Xia Dang's eyes, he was still the healthy and manly boy, so Xia Dang persevered in introducing him to a blind date.

The room was a little stuffy.

Xia Rubing got out of bed and opened the window, picked up her mobile phone and called Dr. John.

It is six o'clock in the evening US time, and Dr. John is having dinner.

He was surprised when he received a call from Xia Rubing: "Xia, aren't you going to sleep?"

Xia Rubing: "I dreamed of that boy again."

"..."

"Thorn-"

The clanging of knives, forks and plates was a bit harsh.

Dr. John sighed in his heart, thinking that the shadow left by childhood will indeed linger for a lifetime.

He sympathized with Xia.

The crime of child trafficking hidden under the dark net of the city's abyss would cause a sensation even if it was made public in the United States.

"It's really not your fault." Dr. John said the old saying that he forgot hundreds of times, and comforted him: "You don't have to feel guilty about it at all. In the final analysis, it's the fault of those criminals..."

This is the job of a psychotherapist.

Old things are brought up again, stereotyped.

Human beings are creatures who heal their scars and forget the pain.

Physical wounds heal quickly and be forgotten, but psychological wounds take a lifetime to heal.

However, frying cold rice is also a technical task, and it needs to be done just right.

Otherwise, if you are not careful, it will become a more intense rumination.

Xia himself is a psychologist with a strong stress protection mechanism.

Dr. John was also able to understand exactly what happened in his childhood through a certain hypnosis.

Xia has always felt guilty about the boy.

Although he ran so fast at the time that he almost blew his lungs—but when he arrived at the police station to call the police, the police still failed to catch the murderer.

When he returned to the basement with the police, there was no one there.

——Probably because the criminals found out that he had escaped and moved the hiding place of the trafficked children ahead of time.

Xia Rubing later regretted countless times why she didn't bring that boy out together.

This kind of victim mentality made his nerves that were already on the verge of collapse worse.

"Perhaps you can try to find the boy," suggested Dr. John.

Xia Rubing shook her head, "I've been searching for a long time, but I still don't have any clues."

Only the crescent-shaped birthmark and the word "Su" engraved on the gold hangtag.

Xia Rubing guessed that the boy should be named Su.

He had doubted Cui Youji before.

Cui Youji was once trafficked.

Compared to his age, the other party was just about the same at that time.

But Cui Youji didn't have a birthmark on his hands, and his biological father was the famous actor Wang Tianzong, surnamed Wang.

Dr. John: "Don't put so much pressure on yourself—you have to believe that you, too, can be happy."

Xia Rubing was silent.

A person who is coerced and suffers from sexism can only be labeled as lewd.

Even after so long, he still felt unworthy.

So facing Cui Youji, he flinched.

How can a dark plant growing in the mud yearn for the sun?

……

At seven o'clock, the fencing team gathered at the main gate of Chongnan University.

Xia Dang was counting the number of people, and led them to the bus after counting.

one extra.

Ruan Shu also followed.

However, he originally belonged to the school's fencing team, so it is understandable to participate in team building.

But everyone still has a lot of complaints about it.

The destination of their group building this time is Tairuo Mountain in G Province, a [-]A-level scenic spot with mountains and water.

The itinerary is four days and three nights, and plans to camp with bonfires, climb mountains, fish, barbecue, and kayak.

"It's so romantic to climb a mountain to watch the sunrise." - These are Xia Dang's original words.

Everyone felt that Xia Dang was very scheming.

Even on vacation, don't forget to incorporate physical training.

Banon interjected grimly: "I hope we don't run into snakes along the way."

Xia Dang said unhappily: "Winter is coming soon, and the snakes are hiding to hibernate!"

He thought to himself, children who grow up in the city are like this, fearful.This time they have to exercise a little bit.

"Besides, my son is here. He has a first-level camping guide certificate, and he will definitely be able to arrange this team building activity properly." Xia Dang said and patted his son on the back proudly.

Xia Rubing stood upright, expressionless like a mobile refrigerant.

Everyone has been sneaking eyes on him for a long time.

Including Nguyen.

Xia Rubing wore a beige mountaineering suit today, a rare casual look.

Li Meng, who was closest to him, realized that he had been staring at the other party for a long time, and his ears turned red after realizing it.

That face was beautiful, but cold as ice.The complexion is fair, and there are lenses on the pair of long and narrow Ruifeng eyes, which appear to be polite, but there is a slight sense of indifference.

It made Li Meng feel in a trance that Professor Xia is like a fairy who came out of a classical ink painting, and he does not eat fireworks.

The team members carried their bags and took their seats one by one.

Zhang Huhu wanted to look for Cui Youji's figure, but found him and Xia Rubing walking slowly behind.

Seeing this, Zhang Huhu's heart moved, he turned around and sat down beside Da Zhuang.

Da Zhuang asked strangely: "Why don't you sit with Cui Shao?"

It is well known that the two brothers have a good relationship.

Zhang Huhu said carelessly: "What do big men care about, and they don't get tired of it."

After all the people in front sat down, there were not many seats left.

Cui Youji naturally sat next to Xia Rubing.

Xia Dang sat right in front of them.

The car started slowly, and the driver told them to fasten their seat belts.

There were so many people in the bus, Cui Youji didn't think about what to do.

He was sitting upright, with his hands on his knees like a good baby.

Xia Rubing suddenly touched his trouser pocket.

There is a mobile phone in there.

Cui Youji winked, and immediately took out his phone to light up the screen.

A new message.

Xia: [This is what you said, pretending not to know? ]

CYJ: [Just sit together, no one will think about it]

Xia Rubing didn't reply again.

Cui Youji thought he was angry, took a piece of chocolate from his pocket, and quietly took Xia Rubing's hand and stuffed it.

Xia Rubing gently scratched his palm with her fingers.

Next, take his hand and put it on your thigh.

Cui Youji's back stiffened instantly.

so wet...

Sticky.

The fragrance of guava gradually diffuses.

There are so many people, how dare Xia Rubing do it?

He blushed.

Many team members are pulling the curtains to catch up on sleep.

Just as the car drove into the tunnel, the light in front of him suddenly dimmed.

Cui Youji tilted his head slightly, and whispered back in the other's ear, "Is this what you mean by pretending not to know each other?"

Xia Rubing said softly: "It's just a touch, no one will think about it."

Cui Youji tried to calm down, but his face became hotter and hotter until his neck became red.

Xia Rubing said something to him silently.

Under the dim light, Cui Youji stared at the opening and closing of the thin red lips, translating the mouth shape of the other party in his mind as if to say:

You are so excited.

Cui Youji felt like he was possessed by a demon, being bewitched by some kind of strange.

He sneaked close to that face, wanting to kiss Xia Rubing.

"boom--"

The car exits the tunnel.

The light came back on.

Cui Youji paused.

"Hush." ​​Xia Rubing put his hand back and said, "Don't worry."

……

The carriage shakes and undulates, and the scenery keeps receding.

Ruan Shu sat in the back row and couldn't see the situation in front of him even if he stretched his head out.

Knowing that Cui Youji and Xia Rubing must be sitting together, he felt inexplicably irritable.

Just half a month ago, Ruan Shu had a bizarre dream.

Waking up from the dream, some memories of the previous life appeared out of thin air.

The pages of the book flipped.

In those flickering fragments, Ruan Shu saw that he joined the national fencing team, won the Olympic champion along the way smoothly, and reached the pinnacle of fencing.

He lives in a big villa, and the garage is full of luxury cars.He shoots variety shows and commercials, and every time he goes out, he is surrounded by countless fans.

He married Bai Yueguang Xia Rubing, whom he longed for, and had a happy marriage. He planned to adopt a child and a dog.

But Xia Rubing resists being touched by others, and the two have never slept in the same bed.

He locked up Cui Youji and maintained an underground lover relationship.

He vented his S tendency crazily on the other party.

He thought he loved Xia Rubing deeply.Cui Youji is just a dispensable toy.

Until one day Cui Youji was played to death by him, he tied the body with stones in a panic and sank into the deep sea.

His heart seemed to have been dug out a big hole, empty.

He was devastated and couldn't sleep or eat.

It was only then that Ruan Shu realized that he had fallen in love with Cui Youji long ago, but he hadn't realized it until now, and the authorities were obsessed with it.

But Cui Youji is dead.

So for the rest of his life, while maintaining a sexless marriage with Xia Rubing, he spent the rest of his life regretting and despairing from grief to madness.

"boom!"

The car slammed on the brakes and stopped in front of the zebra crossing to wait for the green light.

Ruan Shu leaned forward and regained his senses.

He knew he was born again.

Cui Youji probably did the same, that's why he went to soak in Xia Rubing.He wants revenge on him!

Ruan Shu gritted his teeth.

It's as if... the two precious items that belonged to him suddenly gained consciousness and ran away from home, and instead abandoned him.

"No." Ruan Shu murmured.

He couldn't just watch himself lose Cui Youji again.

There must be a way.