You, teach me how to do things?

It was night, and Xia Yuanling had already fallen asleep.

The room arranged by Ms. Mei was really good, but because the two of them were exhausted, they only went to bed once and rested.

Shang Chuan put on a pajamas, got up, and walked to the window.

From here, you can see the sea in the distance.

Maybe it's the sea, the tide that surges in the dark night, undulates, and ebbs and flows in line with the frequency of breathing.

There was a sound of spitting bubbles from behind, and Xia Yuanling didn't know what kind of dream he was having, so he hummed.

Shang Chuan was amused by his voice, and after a laugh, he turned to look at the sea outside the window.

In this quiet night, he uncontrollably thought of the girl who had never seen the sea.

Shang Miao.

Shang Chuan reached out and touched the glass of the window, as if wanting to take in the scenery outside the window in his palm.

He remembered that Xia Yuanling circled him just now, and called him Teacher Shang with winking eyes.

After all, he can't go back to be a teacher, and it's impossible for him to regain his books and lesson plans.

In fact, some time ago, Fanzi sent him a message, saying that he had found a job and taught college Chinese in an ordinary university in this city.He asked Shang Chuan if he was interested and could arrange for Shang Chuan to give a lecture.

Shang Chuan refused.

For no reason, he will never be a teacher again in his life, nor will he like literature anymore.

only because--

His arrogance and conceit drove his only sister to death.

He will bear this punishment forever, until the day when he will be covered by loess forever.

Shang Chuan and Xia Yuanling went on a trip, which was another great opportunity for Luo Feiluan to catch up.

It was rare for An Qian to take a break during this period. He went through the formalities required for the registered studios of himself, Xia Yuanling and An Youyou, and then signed the labor contracts of several newly hired employees.Although the procedures seem to be quite a lot, it is enough to run once a day, which is much easier than filming with Xia Yuanling.

During this time, Luo Feiluan has to help a friend who is a music producer shoot an MV, but the workload is not bad.As soon as work was over here, he rushed to find An Qian.

He recently planted a roast duck restaurant on a certain social platform. He remembered that An Qian mentioned that he likes to eat roast duck, and Luo Feiluan wanted to take him to try it.

It was also inexplicable that An Qian was asked out by him this time. He said that he wanted to call a few directors to have dinner together, but when he arrived, he found that he was the only one.An Qian was naturally not wary of Luo Feiluan, but during this period of time, Luo Feiluan repeatedly asked herself out alone, which also made An Qian mutter in his heart.

He is a person with a sensitive and delicate mind. Once he grasps something that is wrong, he will start to think wildly.

"Try and see how this restaurant tastes?" Luo Feiluan coaxed An Qian to taste the tenderest pieces of duck skin, and while An Qian was not paying attention, he wrapped the duck with lotus leaf cake for him The meaty cucumber and shredded green onion were passed to An Qian.

His enthusiastic behavior did not arouse An Qian's favor, but it made An Qian's doubts rise to another level.

"Didn't you say there are others? Why am I the only one?"

"Ah, they don't have time, so let me go." Luo Feiluan's lies were full of loopholes. Perhaps because he had come out with An Qian more often recently, he didn't bother to perfunctory, "You also know our industry The timing is not very good.”

An Qian put down the chopsticks in his hand.

If he can't even recognize this kind of lie, he really doesn't need to be Xia Yuanling's manager.

"You are the film king, how can others take care of you?" An Qian put his hands under the table.

Luo Feiluan continued to make up lies: "That's not necessarily—"

"Don't lie to me, okay?" An Qian lowered his head again.

"Don't say the word cheating, it's not that serious, I just want to ask you out for dinner alone."

"why?"

An Qian turned his head to look at Luo Feiluan.

He didn't understand what was worth Luo Feiluan's attention on him.

Luo Feiluan also turned his head to make a safety dive.

Having come out so many times, Luo Feiluan murmured in his heart, or tell him.

Tell him that he recognized the note, that he likes him?

only--

Luo Feiluan underestimated An Qian's understanding of him.

He turned his head to look at An Qian's eyes, An Qian was too familiar.

He has been chasing Luo Feiluan for many years, and he knows what he looks like when he smiles, what he looks like when he cries, what he looks like when he is wronged, and An Qian knows his expressions like the palm of his hand.

This expression——

An Qian stood up from the chair in fright.

His staggering, frantic steps caused the chair to move and whine against the floor.

"I, I think I like—"

Before he could express his love, An Qian screamed to stop him.

"No!" An Qian stepped back a few steps, "No—"

Luo Feiluan couldn't understand: "Why?"

Why……

You ask me why?

Because that night, in the room smelling of alcohol, my body was brutally ripped open by another person.

Because from that moment on, all my beautiful fantasies about love and sex quickly shattered and died.

"because--"

An Qian lowered his head slowly, he didn't cry, but answered Luo Feiluan's answer with a trembling voice: "I'm dirty."

For him, Luo Feiluan will always be a star in the sky.

Beautiful, bright, but out of reach.

He gave himself the direction, and he gave himself the lamp for the long night.

Being able to take advantage of Xia Yuanling's face and occasionally glance at the stars is already a gift to him, how can he monopolize the beauty of the stars?

With this body.

With such a dirty and ugly soul.

But after hearing An Qian's words, Luo Feiluan showed an incomprehensible expression: "What are you talking about?"

An Qian mustered up his courage, and sharply tore away the scars that hurt the most in his heart, the scars that had just healed, revealing the bloody flesh and bones inside.

"I was raped! I was fucked! I don't deserve your love, Luo Feiluan, did you hear that!"

Luo Feiluan couldn't understand at all, who hasn't slept with anyone when he is an adult, and besides, An Qian was forced, the police can prove this point, why should he bear such a serious psychological burden?

"Again, you're right—"

"Stop telling me that stuff, I'm tired of hearing it!"

Everyone is telling me that's right.

But why, why I still can't get out of this matter.

Everyone is very lenient with me.

But I still don't feel able to hold my head up and walk in the sun.

An Qian took the phone and ran out of the restaurant.

Luo Feiluan also chased after her, but when she reached the door, she was stopped by fans who recognized her.

He could only let An Qian run into the night, and then disappear.

There is a crowd between them.

Obviously so close.

But so far away.

He will always be a star.

And he's always the weed in the ditch, gazing at the stars.

An Qian ran back home, but he didn't dare to enter the door, so he stood at the door for a long time, and he dared not enter the house until he calmed down.When his mother came out to greet him, An Qian pretended as if nothing had happened, and told her that she was very busy today and had something to do outside.

The mother could feel that his emotions were not right, but she didn't know what happened, so she comforted him to pay attention to rest and not to work so hard.

An Qian laughed and said that he was fine, and went into the bathroom to take a shower.

He sat in the bathtub, the sound of splashing water covering his sobs.

The cold water calmed his emotions.

In this dark night.

He really wanted to stab his wrist.

He is not good enough for Luo Feiluan.

An Qian didn't tell anyone that when Xin Han raped him, he had feelings.

Obviously the soul resisted so much, but the body gave the most honest response.

He hates himself so much.

Obviously hating that person so much, but this body is so cheap.Obviously, thinking about it afterwards would make me sick, but at that moment, I didn't have the strength to push the evildoer away.

An Qian bit her arm, as if she really hoped to bleed from the bite.

He couldn't feel the pain anymore, he just wantonly vented his hatred for this body.

Like a red-eyed beast.

However, speaking of—

Luo Feiluan didn't finish his words.

That's right, did I make a mistake? How could Luo Feiluan like her in such a short period of time?

Even liking Xia Yuanling seems more reasonable than liking himself.

That's right, maybe the person Luo Feiluan likes is Xia Yuanling, and he is Xia Yuanling's cousin, maybe Luo Feiluan just wants to use himself as Xia Yuanling's substitute.

An Qian turned his head to the side, and the self in the mirror looked a bit similar to Xia Yuanling.

Or maybe, Luo Feiluan just felt that she was cheap and wanted to find a lover to sleep with.His social circle is quite narrow, and he probably can't find any suitable lover, and so many people know that they are dirty.

Luo Feiluan is so perfect, if it is said that he is dating a dirty person, no one will believe it.

Maybe he just wanted to vent his desire.

An Qian let go, and there were bruises on his arm bitten by himself.

He stood up from the bathtub and looked at his body in the mirror.

This is the first time he has looked at his body so directly since he was born.

If it's already dirty, don't worry about getting it dirty again.

As long as you become promiscuous and promiscuous, no one will look at you with sympathy and distress.

As long as this-

He dried himself off, put on his pajamas, went back to his room and restarted his phone.

There were more than 30 missed calls, all from Luo Feiluan.

An Qian took a deep breath and connected the phone.

"An Qian! Where have you been!"

"I am home."

Luo Feiluan breathed a sigh of relief, he almost called the police just now to help find someone.

"I'm sorry I shouldn't have—"

"Let's find a time to talk tomorrow, I can do it anytime."

"Okay," Luo Feiluan replied, "Tomorrow at ten o'clock in the morning, I will pick you up downstairs at your house?"

"No, I'll go to your house." An Qian looked at the bite marks on his arm. Under the warm yellow light, the bruises were a little unclear. "You send me the address. It's late today. I want to Sleep, good night."

"OK, good night."

The author says:

First of all, Shang Miao's death has nothing to do with Shang Chuan. Shang Chuan has been making mistakes, so I won't spoil the details.

Secondly, Luo Feiluan is indeed immature. He underestimated the psychological pressure this incident caused An Qian. go to extremes.

If there was no rape, after Luo Feiluan confessed, Anqian would have struggled for two days, and then he would be sweet with Luo Feiluan without fear.

Unfortunately, no if.