Detective Conan no Miya Yuzu

My name is Akira Shanping. Just hearing the name, I would think that my parents love their child very much and hope that he will have a good tomorrow.However, my mother really hates me so much, she chose this name to let me know that I should be a person with no future, and that I am not worthy of living in this world.

And at the end of everything that caused her to hate me was my father.

In my memory, my father was a kind man, with a smile on his face, approachable and good-favored.Mother just likes such a father, so she will marry him.

It's just that the good times don't last long.Such a good father, but suffering from illness.Seeing my father enduring the pain and his face getting thinner day by day, my mother often hid in a corner and wiped her tears.

Originally, father could have lived longer if he hadn't been saved.

The weather was very hot that day, and my friends nearby took me to swim in the pond.At that time, I hadn't done any preparatory activities, and my feet cramped when I got to the pond.Just when I thought I was going to die, my father saved me, but this caused him to go directly to the operating room, but died during the rescue.

When the mother arrived, what she saw was the body of the father.My mother couldn't accept my father's departure, so she vented all her resentment and anger on me.

I just remember that I was dizzy when I was shaken by her head, and my eardrums were so irritated by her sharp voice that I couldn't hear what she said clearly, but it didn't prevent the expression on her face from being imprinted in my heart, along with the phrase "Why did you die?" It's not you" is also deeply engraved in my heart.

The physical pain is far less than the harm my mother's words brought to me. So I don't like you so much, so you hate me so much?

I really want to ask her loudly, have you ever loved me, even a little?

But I already knew the answer in my heart. Her eyes that wished me to die ten thousand times made me wake up from my dream every night.

Knowing that my mother didn't like me, and didn't want to see me, I gradually began to avoid her.And she really treats me as if I don't exist. No one prepares my three meals, and I won't see her when I'm sick.

If grandma hadn't come home that day, I might have passed away, and the following things would not have happened.

I know I'm sick, the monster living in my body has been trying to break out of the shackles I gave.Mother, do you know, as long as you look at it, or a simple greeting, it will not come out.But you didn't, on the contrary, it was you, it was you who set him free.

All this is caused by you.So, when I saw your incredible eyes and the fear in your eyes, it made my blood boil all over my body.Mother, did you see, this is what you did, you are the one who caused all this, don't you see?Oh, I forgot, you can't see it, and you don't want to see it, after all, I am the existence you hate.I was thinking, did you go to find your father, don't ask, how did I know, the relieved smile on your mouth is so dazzling.

How can you be happy, I am in pain, mother, you should also feel this feeling like me, how wonderful.I think, if you are no longer complete, you will not go to see your father. In this way, you will suffer as much as me.What a brilliant idea, yes, as long as you're not complete.

Thinking of this, I dismembered my mother's body. I dismembered piece by piece. I could feel the blood in my body boiling, screaming, and more.

So, I got used to going out at night.Is it very similar to the monster vampire in Western legends? I have become fond of the feeling of blood sprayed on my face, and the pleasure of dismemberment.It's so satisfying to watch the fearful faces of people who look a lot like you.

I thought this day would continue like this.God let me meet that child, her smile is so bright, like the sun in winter, warming her body without feeling uncomfortable.

I remember being hurt at the time, I thought she would run away in fear when I treated her like that.As a result, it didn't take long to see her running back panting, with an extra bag in her hand.

I know what's in there because the bag came from the pharmacy.

"Fortunately, you are still here." She may not know such a sentence, which made my dry heart moist.I just stared at her blankly like this, but she mistakenly thought that I was hungry. I really don't know why she would have such an idea.

After finishing speaking, there was an extra piece of bread in her hand.Didn't he just buy medicine, but also bread?

Seeing the bread she handed over, he took it by accident, opened it and ate it! !

At that time, I must have been invaded by aliens, so I did something that didn't fit my image.However, seeing her smile, I suddenly had a feeling that this seemed to be a good idea?

"Even if it's a small injury, someone will care about you." She left after saying this.

Will anyone care about me?That's what I wanted to ask at the time.There should be some. I can't remember what my father looked like when he was alive, but his kind face is deeply imprinted in my mind.How did you expect it?Yes, I think my mother looks at me like this, but hope is wiped out again and again, and now I don't believe it anymore.

Do you really not believe it, or are you still yearning for it?I only heard the voice in my head suddenly sounded, with contempt, contempt and pity.

It feels like reason is moving away, and the blood is clamoring for destruction.

All I saw was that the bread left in my hand instantly turned into crumbs and fell, and the bag of medicine was just abandoned on the ground.I just crossed over, obviously not wanting to, the medicine and bread were the kindness of that child, obviously so moved in my heart, but I still turned a blind eye, I am really a monster.

I'm killing again and I can't help myself.Maybe I would let myself go on like this before, because I didn't get warmth.But now that I have it, how can I lose it.

I gave the police some information while I was still sober.If they can find me, then I will plead guilty.Why don't you turn yourself in, because I still have fantasies, fantasies, fantasies that I can see that child again.

After waking up, I found the medicine bag back.Fortunately, it rained heavily that day, and the medicine bag was not taken away.I picked up the bag like a baby, the medicine in the bag is no longer usable, but I still hide it, it is still in my bedside table, but I can't touch it anymore, now I am in a place where I can Although the place where "I" is bound is boring and there is no freedom, I am very happy.

Oh, by the way, you must be wondering why I gave that child a grapefruit, right?

That's really God helping me.

I moved because I didn't want to see the faces of those neighbors.Fortunately, I saw her, the child was talking and laughing with her friends, the smile on his face was so bright, and it made me happy to see her.

I heard them call her Yuzu, a nice name.Wanting to thank her, I clumsily made a pomelo pendant, which is not pretty at all.I wanted to give it to her several times, but I couldn't.

Until that day, I anticipated that my days with impunity would be numbered.

The day I was arrested, I met her.

The surprised look on his face was very cute, with the joy of reunion on his face, I was really moved.You always remember me, even if it's just as a stranger.

When we met again, I saw the boy, the boy next to the grapefruit that day, the boy who noticed me looking at the grapefruit, the boy who kept staring at me.

In fact, the last time we met, I didn't expect it.Seeing the disbelief and doubts on your face, I really want to tell you that I am the murderer, and you are wrong.But I can't bear to do it, and I don't want to, I hope that I am still that stranger in your heart, not that devil who kills without blinking an eye.

Thankfully, I gave that pendant away.No one knew how nervous I was at the time. The palms of my handcuffed hands were sweating, and the temperature of my fingertips gradually lost.

You just accepted it, and I can see that you like it, and the tension in my heart disappeared and was replaced by joy.

I can also feel that "I" seems to have disappeared, which makes me so excited. It would be even better if there were no handcuffs and these policemen next to me.However, I am responsible for what "me" does.

So, Yuzu, if I come out, if you still remember me, will you be my friend?

With such small hopes, can I still realize this dream?

The author has something to say:

Akira Yamai is actually a gentle person. It was the environment that made him gloomy, and even buried himself so that no one would know, to protect his broken heart.

He longs to be cared for and loved by others, but he dares not take that step, guarding that small world cautiously.