bad derailment

I never thought it would end with Chen Feng in this way.Peaceful, short, the most respectable breakup ever.

It's the result I've longed for since I first started working with him five years ago.But the moment Chen Feng really said the word 'break up', I felt like I stepped on the air and fell from a high place, without the so-called relief and joy.

I suddenly realized that the five years I was entangled with Chen Feng were not a number, but the cycle of four seasons, countless days and nights that really existed.

He chose to leave without any sloppiness, and made the final judgment on our feelings.Perhaps he has thought about this sentence countless times in his heart, but now, he just found the best time to say it.

There was a wordless silence in the room, Gu Mingsheng stood there, and walked towards me after a long time.He seemed to want to hug me, or say something comforting, but before I had time to think, I turned sideways to avoid his movements.

Gu Mingsheng's outstretched hand slowly lowered after a pause, and after a while it turned into a soft voice: "Xiao Yao, sit down and rest for a while."

"Did Chen Feng call that call in the morning?" I raised my head and asked him directly.

He pursed his lower lip and said nothing.The silence at this moment is more clear and effective than any words, I couldn't help but twitched the corners of my mouth, I wanted to laugh but couldn't.

"Gu Mingsheng, I have already managed to ignore the messy relationships around you, why do you want to influence my thoughts without authorization?" I stared at him and paused, "Why didn't you tell me?"

His eyes darkened, "I thought you didn't care about him."

Care, don't care.These clearly annotated words in the dictionary were smashed and messed up, and I couldn't tell which one was correct and which one was what I really thought.

Or, does it matter?

"Whether I care or not, you can't make a decision for me. This is between me and Feng Chen, and has nothing to do with you."

My heart is so stuffy and painful, I want to find someone to relieve this unbearable pain quickly, anyone can do it.

And Gu Mingsheng bumped straight into it.

His expression froze for a moment, as if frozen in place, and he finally pulled the corner of his mouth after a few seconds.

"I'm sorry, I went too far in this matter." After he finished speaking, he paused quietly for a long time. "Are you going to catch up? He shouldn't have gone far."

I looked into Gu Mingsheng's eyes, and couldn't help but laugh absurdly, "Why should I chase after him? We've already broken up. Didn't you hear what he said just now?"

He didn't seem to think it was so funny, countless words were transmitted silently through a pair of eyes.I turned my head in embarrassment, blank for a long time, and my body suddenly fell into a warm embrace mixed with light fragrance.

"Don't cry," Gu Mingsheng pressed the back of my head, and a deep voice sounded from above, "Xiao Yao, I'm fine now."

"Who said I cried..."

I opened my mouth to refute, but when I uttered a trembling voice, it was so unfamiliar that it almost seemed to come from my throat.I buried my eyes on Gu Mingsheng's shoulder and blinked vigorously, the wet liquid couldn't stop falling from the eye sockets, uncontrollably wetting a piece of cloth.

Gu Mingsheng hugged me indifferently, and gently followed my back.I've never been so embarrassed, tears flowed down my face non-stop, I could only bite my lip and suppress my voice, the world I could see was blurred.

I thought a lot, a lot of bizarre, meaningless things.If I hadn't been on a business trip, wouldn't Chen Feng rush over here on purpose?If I didn't give him the room number, would Chen Feng not be able to find the right room?If I hadn't developed this wrong relationship with Gu Mingsheng, would Chen Feng just...

Will he just break up, and continue to be together again after the quarrel and awkwardness like before?

Gu Mingsheng wanted to stay with me, but his manager called again. A few minutes seemed like a century.He hung up the phone with a gloomy face, and told me apologetically that he had to go back to work now, and the crew had already set a start time.

I have no reason to keep him. With Gu Mingsheng, work is always the unshakable number one.No matter how reluctant and caring he shows, I know he won't make any changes for me.

He may like me, but his feelings will never be as straightforward and passionate as Chen Feng's.

After Gu Mingsheng left, I was left alone in the room.The cake was quietly lying in the bag, and the logo on it was very familiar. It came from a well-known bakery in Shaocheng.

I have held back my tears, and put on the calmness and self-control that an adult should have with the fastest speed.Until the sweet strawberry flavor and cream touch the taste buds, it seems to be a strange switch, which makes the tears that had been stopped wet the corners of the eyes uncontrollably.

It's weird that I don't even understand where this sadness is coming from.Perhaps Chen Feng cast some magic power on this cake, every bite was sweet and bitter, and the astringency melted down the throat, flowing into the internal organs.

And now, I lost the last gift Chen Feng gave me.

The phone rang, it was a message from Zhao Quan.He said that his stomach was badly eaten by the barbecue last night, and he is still lying on the bed unable to move, so he can only push back his work a little bit, with a picture of a weeping little soybean.

I replied to him 'it's okay, you have a good rest today', suddenly saw a message from Chen Feng 3 minutes ago from the corner of my eye, and my heart almost stopped suddenly.

Just the moment I opened it, it seemed as if I was splashed from head to toe by ice water.

Chen Feng: I will go home and pack up my things, try to move out before you come back, I will leave the key on the kitchen table, when everything is over, we will never contact again.

I looked at this passage repeatedly, trying to complete Chen Feng's voice in my mind like masochistic.The typing fingers trembled slightly: Actually, there is no need to be in such a hurry, I don't mind.

Chen Feng: But I mind.

He returned quickly, as if he hadn't thought about it at all.

Chen Feng: Lin Yao, I have given you many chances.

These two sentences were the last trace of kindness he showed. After getting used to being favored, I almost forgot Chen Feng's indifference and alienation towards others.

And now, he also put me into the category of 'others'.

I want to call him and ask him again if he really wants to break up.This idea was ups and downs in my heart, but in the end I didn't do anything, and mechanically sent him a "yes".

Whether it was once or twenty times, I knew that Chen Feng's answer would not change.He has always been determined and stubborn, especially when it comes to liking me.Now, he also broke up with me with the same attitude.

I seem to have really lost him, this time it was not a dream, nor was it a fantasy for no reason.Chen Feng always said that he was afraid that I would abandon him, but he was the one who abandoned me first in the end.

I had a terrible headache, and my whole body was unbearably uncomfortable. I could only bury myself on the bed, struggling back and forth between waking and sleeping.When I was half asleep and half awake, I suddenly remembered a sentence that I don’t know who said that people often don’t regret seeing other people’s pain. When they really regret, most of them feel the pain themselves.

I finally realized Chen Feng's pain all along, but this regret came a little too late.

There is still one day left for the business trip, but fortunately, the work process is almost full.I'm glad that all the interviews were done before Chen Feng came, which allowed me to keep one in my relationship and work.

It was a coincidence that Zhao Quan's abdominal pain came that day, and I could only use this day to adjust my mood, and the next day I changed into a mask to socialize normally.But despite this, Zhao Quan, who has always been carefree, also sensed something was wrong, and he said cautiously: "Brother Lin Yao, you made a mistake here."

I shook my head for a moment before returning to the computer in front of me. Looking at the horrible typesetting page, I said with some embarrassment: "Understood, thank you."

Zhao Quan was hesitant to speak, and after a few minutes, he still couldn't hold back and said, "Brother Lin Yao, I think your complexion is not very good, or I will do the rest, you go and have a rest first. .”

I shook my head, "No, we already have a division of labor, and you worked very hard in the past few days, so let me do it."

Zhao Quan said: "But your work efficiency is not high in this state, and it is a big project to look back and check it. Why don't you let me do it all, maybe it can improve efficiency. Brother Lin Yao, you can rest assured. "

He babbled and pushed me away from the notebook, with unconcealable concern inside and outside the words.I could only nod my head and pull out my first smile in the past two days, "Then I will trouble you."

Zhao Quan seemed to be there in a daze, looked at me and blinked hesitantly, "Brother Lin Yao, are you really alright?"

"I'm fine, what can I do?" I pretended to be relaxed and pulled my smile a little bigger.

Unexpectedly, Zhao Quan stammered as if he saw something terrible, "Yes, but I don't think I've seen you show such an expression before...Brother Lin Yao, why don't you laugh?" Well, I'm a little scared."

Hearing this, I really couldn't help laughing, my tired heart finally came alive for a moment, "Okay, then I won't laugh, you do your best, I won't bother you."

This time Zhao Quan seemed to be relieved, nodded and continued to work.

In this strange city, the mood seems to be stored in a transparent box.I can see it, but keep a certain distance from it, so that I don't feel too strong, only occasionally feel trance.

On this day, I almost thought that I had completely adjusted my mood, but this confidence was completely shattered after I returned to Yancheng.

Everything around me is fatally familiar.The streets Chen Feng and I walked countless times, the supermarkets he used to go to on weekends, the basketball court where we couldn’t help but stop, the steps where we almost fell down twice because we were short.

I can even recall how Chen Feng laughed at me at the side, although he was still supporting me and didn't hide the tension on his face.

There are traces of my life with him everywhere here, and every road we walk is accompanied by Chen Feng's figure and breath.In a trance, I heard Chen Feng whining and complaining in my ear, he always couldn't say a few good words, he either talked about me around the corner, or complained about other things.But as long as he thinks that he will never hear this kind of thing that was annoying before, he will feel that he was actually cute and stupid at that time.

"Lin Yao."

For a moment, I seemed to really hear Chen Feng's voice blowing into my ears with the wind, it didn't really seem like it was hallucinating from my head.I couldn't help laughing, and my heart trembled inexplicably, until I heard another sound in my ear——

"Lin Yao."

This voice was familiar and short. I finally realized that it was not a hallucination, and turned my head to meet the gaze of Chen Feng from behind.

He stood there, wearing an ordinary T-shirt and trousers, his hair seemed to grow a little longer, and it was as dark as his pupils.He looked at me, didn't do anything, and everything around him was overshadowed in my eyes.

It seems that I haven't seen Chen Feng for a long time, I didn't see him so carefully, from every strand of hair to the curvature of his mouth, I almost forgot that the last time I met him was two days ago.

I almost forgot that we have no relationship now.

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The separation is temporary, Xiao Chen will not be