Rebirth of Jinse Nianhua

There is such a passage in "Sleepless in Seattle" that I am most touched by - I like and am used to keeping a distance from changing things, so that I can know what is the criterion that will not be abandoned by time.For example, loving someone is full of variables, so I took a step back and watched quietly until I saw sincere feelings.

I used to be full of confidence in Song Yu's feelings, so confident that I didn't need to take a step back and watch quietly until I saw sincere feelings, I dared to pat my chest and say loudly to people all over the world that no one can love him that much except me, Even though this relationship has spanned two lifetimes, I am still so determined, the determination that goes deep into the bone marrow, deeper than the birthmark.

Maybe a lot of things were preordained. My parents died early back then, and my sister brought me up alone. I have to admit that everything my sister gave me was the best. In addition to really loving me, she also sympathized with me. .

Therefore, my sister’s love always has a more or less high-profile attitude. When facing her, I can’t really straighten my back. I can only numb myself constantly. As it should be, it is reasonable for me to ask her for anything. Don't I, an orphan whose parents died at the age of four, not even have the right to be a little bit willful?

But, I also know that paralysis is just paralysis. I can't balance my mentality. No matter how I increase or decrease the weight on the balance, I can't achieve a complete balance. All I can do is study hard and study hard. I don't want my sister to have any chance to look down on me. I hope to repay her love with the best grades I can get, so that I won't feel that I am useless. Maybe it is because of this that Ruan Jitong has gradually become a little sick , My domineering, my arrogance, and my willful behavior are all because of my fear. I need to arm myself in this way, even if it is just a strong outside.

I have been looking forward to a day when someone can see through my disguise, I am looking forward to that person who can patiently peel off my sharp and hard hedgehog shell layer by layer, warm me and care for me with his most sincere feelings, love me.

Song Yu's intrusion was the biggest surprise in my life. When my sister appeared in front of me holding his hand for the first time, I knew that this man would be different. His every move was so elegant, His every word and action are so delicate, his every frown and smile are so clear.

Slowly, I began to get used to being alone with Song Yu, and I began to try to tear apart a small piece of brick from the heart wall I built with my own hands to see if he could find a way in, it had been gloomy and cold for too many years , what is needed most is a warm air current.

Song Yu is really an excellent dream lover, this is my most pertinent evaluation of him.

But when I fell in love with each other specifically, whether it was Song Yu who moved first or me first, or both of them at the same time, I can’t remember clearly. I just remember that he was the first one I fell in love with in so many years besides my sister. Those who are close to him, Ruan Jitong's psychological defense line is definitely not easy to break through, but once it breaks through, it can never be repaired, and it will only be open to that person in his life, and it will never be possible to accommodate the second one, because that place is too small, only one time. the size of a heart.

Different from my sister, Song Yu did everything for me voluntarily. He will not feel guilty towards me because of his parents’ early death like his sister. He feels that being good to me is an inescapable responsibility. Good just because he wants to be nice to me, there are not so many complicated reasons.

I think a career-oriented strong woman like my sister will never understand why her younger brother falls in love with someone of the same sex. In fact, this love has nothing to do with gender and who it is, but Song Yu appeared at the right time, as precise as beforehand. It has been calculated countless times, he appeared in time when I was about to fall into the abyss of eternal doom, and with his solid arms and chest gave me the love without any emotion ~ color that I most desire in my heart.

At that moment, I realized that there are still people who can see through me, and there are still people who are not afraid of Ruan Jitong's thorns all over his body.

Bumblebee, I used to laugh at myself that way.

Later Song Yu said that the name "Bumblebee" was not appropriate at all, so I asked him what was the appropriate name, he put his arms around me and smiled, and said: "Tongtong should be called 'Little Bee', although there is a small thorn on the buttocks. It's a small thorn, but people don't offend him, he doesn't offend others, Tongtong is protecting himself."

"Don't say it as if you know me very well." I always like duplicity, not to mention how happy I am, little bee, hehe, little bee.

Song Yu didn't answer, just smirked, rubbing his stubbled chin back and forth against my neck, which made my heart itch so hard that I couldn't scratch it.

There is no way to stop, I just love him so much, what can I do?

Zhou Diqing swears that Song Yu is obedient to me, and on the surface he agreed to my application for a double degree, but in fact he used means to sabotage me in private.

I have no doubts about Zhou Diqing. It's not because of my trust in him, but because I know too well that he doesn't bother to lie to others. His self-righteousness and arrogance are innate skills like eating and sleeping. This disease has penetrated into the bone marrow and is incurable.

I also don’t want to deny that this answer hit me hard, I need to be sincere, even if Song Yu opposed my application for a double degree in person, it’s better than another unrelated outsider came to tell me that he was doing something behind the scenes.

Yes, he can have countless reasons to prevent me from applying for a double degree. The most important reason is that he doesn’t want me to work too hard. He said that he will support me, but he doesn’t know that I can’t stay out of this road. I couldn't help but watch him go through the thorns and thorns and fight bloody battles alone.

We love each other so much, we should go through any difficulties on this road hand in hand, even if this road is covered with red-hot coals, even if this road is full of thorns, even if this road is full of overgrown Barb, we should all bear it together. This is the life I really want. The childish life pattern of "I control you, you spoil me" envisioned by Ruan Jitong in the previous life is outdated.

Reality is reality, and it will never become a fairy tale. I will grow up one day, my shoulders will become wider and wider, my arms will become stronger and stronger, and my steps will become more stable, one step at a time.

When I walked to the north gate, Song Yu was already waiting there. City B was already a bit cold in November, and the wind blowing on the face made people feel the urge to shiver. It won’t be long before the government will provide collective heating , but in the bitter night wind, Song Yu still stood upright, the direction of his eyes was inexplicably reassuring.

I waved at him and trotted towards him.

"Are you having fun?" Song Yu hugged me, and I could feel the coldness of his fingertips through the fabric of his clothes.

I pushed him and whispered, "Get in the car, it's cold outside."

Song Yu didn't say anything anymore, turned around and opened the co-pilot's door to protect me and sat in. Look, he even noticed such details. When parking, he deliberately turned the co-pilot's side to the direction I came out of.

I took off my backpack and put it in the back seat, bowed my head and carefully fastened my seat belt, Song Yu went around and sat in.

The orange lights were on in the carriage, and the light was warm and ambiguous.

I looked sideways at Song Yu, and he was also staring at me, with a smile that reached the bottom of his heart.

"Remember that I applied for a double degree before?" I reached out and stroked Song Yu's face with a calm tone.

Song Yu's eyes quickly flashed a slight hesitation, but soon filled with a warm smile, he nodded: "I remember."

I smiled, and naughty pinched him on the face: "The business school finally gave me a reply today."

Song Yu kept smiling and raised his eyebrows without saying a word, motioning for me to reveal the answer directly, he is an absolutely smart person, he knows what "reply" means, two answers, he will not know until I say one of them It's easy to show off.

"Passed." I squinted my eyes with a smile, and leaned my head on the back of the chair to see Song Yu's reaction.

Song Yu was not surprised by this answer at all, and reached out to cover my flailing hand covering his face, the smile in his eyes gradually deepened, he grabbed my hand and brought it to his mouth, and kissed it gently After a while, he raised his head and looked at me, the corners of his mouth were raised and relaxed, and he said, "Tongtong, if you work too hard and can't hold on, no one will blame you, you know?"

"Well." I pecked at the rice, "How can you blame me if you love me so much?"

Song Yu grabbed my hand and sent it back. He rubbed his slender knuckles randomly in my hair, his sexy and magnetic voice echoed in the narrow compartment, and he opened and closed his thin lips and said to me: "Tong Tong, I love you."

I grabbed his hand suddenly and didn't let go, Song Yu looked at me puzzled, I put my mouth together with a smirk, instead of kissing, I took a hard bite.

I was really biting with all my breastfeeding strength, but Song Yu resisted the pain and let me bite.

It's a small punishment, but I'm not going to puncture the window paper.

"Does it hurt?" I asked.

Song Yu nodded and confessed honestly: "It hurts."

"The pain means you didn't just say you loved me just now." I laughed.

Song Yu also laughed: "Even in a dream, I still love Tongtong so much."

I punched him, and said shyly, "Don't be gross, go home quickly."

"Don't you want to take another bite?" He took the initiative to bring his hand to my mouth, pushed his nose on his face and returned it.

I slapped it away and said with a suppressed smile, "Things are rare and expensive."

There is really nothing that cannot be forgiven. This is a man who loves me. Everything he does is not to hurt me. He said that he loves me like life.

2013-11-25

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