want to die in winter [be]

I know I'm stupid, but I'm still a little disappointed after seeing this result. With such rubbish results, I can't get into Jingning No. [-] Middle School.

I fell into my second choice and went to Jingning No. [-] Middle School.

This school is considered the worst school in Jingning, but it is very close to No. [-] Middle School, so I knew that Lu Changfeng would get into No. [-] Middle School. After all, he was smart since childhood.

I ate the overnight meal, packed my schoolbag and luggage and walked to the school step by step. It took almost an hour to arrive at the school. After the report, I sat on the bed and packed my things.

High school is different from junior high school. You need accommodation and you have to go back once a month.

There are six people in our dormitory, and I came late, so I was left with the top bunk at the door.

I packed up my things and sat on the bed in a daze of boredom.

Then there are classes, military training, and classes.

I was relieved until the day I could go home.

As soon as I left the school gate, I saw that Jingning No. [-] Middle School not far away was also on vacation.

I opened my eyes wide to see if I would meet him.

He is tall, with outstanding looks, and he is really the kind of person who can be seen at a glance in the crowd.

I noticed that he walked out of school with a few classmates shoulder to shoulder, and some of them were our friends who played together in junior high school.

They probably came out a little late, and by the time a few people walked onto the main road, the crowd at the school gate had already dispersed.

I stared at his back, wanted to go up to say hello, but dared not, and longed for him to turn around and see me.

Then I saw a cute girl bouncing over and patting Lu Changfeng. Lu Changfeng turned his head to look at her with a smile on his face.

I dare not go there at all.

At that time, I thought, if he still wants to play with me, he should look at the gate of my school like me.

But he didn't.

I got it.

He managed to get into a good school in high school, and he has so many good friends, like me, he finally got rid of it, how could he take me to play with him again.

In fact, when they were in junior high school, they often organized a group to go out for dinner, and Bai Qiaohe took me once.

I sat at the table cautiously, and then Lu Changfeng went to order. I was so nervous when I saw those unfamiliar faces that I wanted to go to the toilet.

After I went there, I heard one of Lu Changfeng’s classmates in the bathroom say, “Hey, why did Changfeng bring such a person with him?”

"what?"

"That's what, it's called Bie Zheng? He's like a scavenger. He was sweating nervously sitting there just now. I laughed so hard. Could it be that he hasn't eaten in this kind of place before?"

"Hahahaha I guess I don't even know how to use the toilet."

……

I listened to their words word by word, and left the toilet as if nothing had happened.

Even so, I can't leave early, I can't let Lu Changfeng lose face.

I finished the meal with no emotions, and left with Lu Changfeng. After that, I never went out to eat with him again. Even in the days when I was in junior high school, I started to avoid him, for fear that I would let him like this. Friends laughed.

But he didn't realize it at all, even though he was not in the same class, he would call me to go to the bathroom after class.

In the past few days, I found that he no longer played with those classmates. Gradually, I became close friends with him again.

But at that time, it was only a class distance away. Now, it is a school with mature thoughts and characters.

I shouldn't be pestering him like a mangy dog.

He is good enough for me.

I went home in a daze, and saw my dad was beating my mom when he was drunk.

In the end, my dad fell asleep, and my mom squatted next to the sofa, covering her mouth and crying softly.

I said Mom, why don't we go and divorce him.

My mother cried and said, "What will you do if you get divorced? Don't say stupid things. Don't let you get married easily in the future, and don't stay with others easily."

"Hmm." I said, "Mom, are you hungry? I'll order some noodles for you."

My mother gradually regained her mood, and returned to the room with a tired face: "Go and eat by yourself, I'm going back to sleep."

I bit the noodles by myself, thinking about Lu Changfeng.

The meeting later was the second time to go home.

The little bully in our class stopped me after class and asked me to give him money. I finally saved five yuan and wanted to buy a small cake for my mother, so this time I won’t beat him to death. Give it to him, I will run out quickly as soon as school is over.

Probably because I ran ahead of Lu Changfeng this time, he called me by my name when he saw me, I was afraid, so I had no choice but to run.

He came to me at night, saying that I ignored him, that he waited for me every time after school but couldn't find him.

The third meeting seemed to be a long time ago, but he actually ran directly to the gate of our school, saying that he had to wait for me for a long time before arriving, and insisted on going back with me.

I think, actually, I kind of liked him back then.

The day I really realized that I liked him was a day off, and I went to their school to find him and go home with him as agreed.

At that time, he was already in the second year of high school, and he studied very well, and he was in Class One of the second year of high school.

I don't have a mobile phone yet, so I can only wait for him at the door of the class, for fear that he won't find me.

After asking the way, I knew that the second floor was for the sophomore class, and it was Class [-] of the sophomore class all the way to the end.

I saw the girl who hopped up next to him last time confessed to him, her voice was loud and passionate, without any timidity.

His face was full of boldness and straightforwardness.

"Be my boyfriend, okay Lu Changfeng, tell me."

I stood at the corner not daring to pass, like a voyeur waiting for his answer.

He answered without hesitation: "No."

The girl got angry: "Why! Could it be that you have someone you like?"

Lu Changfeng: "I want to study hard, I don't have time to fall in love."

girl:"……"

"You lie to the ghost! You also wrote so many notes for your friend. You obviously knew how to write five or six books. Study hard? Are you kidding???"

Those notes are all for me.

Lu Changfeng suddenly asked me to study hard one day, and in order to urge me to return my notes, he said that he wrote them down in class, and the head teacher asked everyone to write them down.

I believed it was true and nodded, only to find out that day that he wrote it for me specially.

I hooked my lips unconsciously, and looked boldly at the wall.

When Lu Changfeng saw me, the corners of his lips twitched slightly, holding the schoolbag with one hand and hooking it on his shoulder, he walked over and directly lifted my back collar.

"Sneaking at what? Let's go."

I enjoyed this movement, leaning against him, tilting my head and bending my eyes to look at him.

As the sun sets, his and I overlap each other, being elongated and drifting away.