How does it sound familiar.
Song Li Song Qi.
This is too deliberate, Wen Song thought, it was just to please people.But to him, this kind of nonsense nonsense is more convincing than clear factual arguments.
Even if he knew it was intentional, Mengdian was poked to death.
He still took the umbrella, and when he walked out of the subway station, he disliked plausibly, "There are not even dark clouds, and the sky is not dark. It will definitely not rain."
Qin Qin didn't argue, just said, "It will be done."
There was still one kilometer away from the entrance of the park, and before I had walked halfway, the rain fell from the sky.
Wen Song: "..."
Terrible, even God listened to him.
There are bushes on the side of the road, only railings and trash cans, and there is no need to think about what else can keep out the rain.Wen Song opened the umbrella in his hand convinced, "Why are you more accurate than the weather forecast?"
The umbrella blooms a transparent flower above the head.Qin Qin said naturally, "I grew up here."
He is very familiar with the weather of this city, just like a dragonfly will fly low without a weather forecast. Autumn in City C is rainy.But unlike the gust of wind and rain that I encountered last time when I went to Lingsong Temple, today's rain is not heavy.The fine rain is continuous, falling gently on the umbrella surface with almost no sound, and it doesn't affect the walk too much.
Visiting the garden in the rain is quite artistic.Wen Song originally came with a mission. He came in for a stroll, and was also attracted by the well-maintained garden scenery, so he took a lot of photos.
In the garden, the green shade overlaps, the winding paths lead to secluded places, and the environment is quiet and elegant.Before I came here, I didn't expect that this former residence of a celebrity is a small manor.The owner of the garden is a patriot who contributed to the country during the war with remarkable achievements.There are stories of his life on the doorways of houses or on notice boards in various places in the garden.
Wen Song took these photos and sent them to the homework group to complete the task. He also took a lot of bonsai and flower trees.Holding an umbrella in one hand and a mobile phone in the other, he is very busy.
He just doesn't care about the people around him.
After entering the garden, Qin Qin stayed beside him quietly, his presence was not as strong as that of a tree.After following along for a while, it seemed wrong to always do this and watch him take pictures, so he said lamely, "Thinking class...does it take so much material to make a ppt?"
"No, but I like flowers." Wen Song glanced at him and said confidently, "Is there a problem?"
"No problem." Qin Tan answered immediately, "I like flowers too."
Who are you kidding?Wen Song snorted unmoved, remembering the old debt, "You obviously threw away the flowers sent by others."
Qin Qin froze for a moment, paused for a few seconds before realizing what he was talking about, and patched up stubbornly: "I just don't like the flowers sent by others, and the ones that grow in the field are okay."
"..."
Wen Song wanted to hum him again to show his indifference, but unfortunately he couldn't hold back after holding back, and was still amused.
The handsome guy's overtures are really irresistible.
Seeing him smile, Qin Qin's expression relaxed, "You have been unhappy today."
I don't know if it was because of the group members who suddenly missed the appointment, or because of an accident last week.The truth should be that there are both, but in Qin Qin's heart, the sense of guilt is infinitely magnified, and when he sees him frowning or sighing, he feels that it is his fault.It was a bit tormenting to be by his side with an almost atonement-like mind.
Wen Song didn't know, and proudly said, "You even like flowers, if I don't cooperate with you to smile, it will appear that my EQ is very low."
It took 10 minutes to take pictures, and it took three hours to go back and forth. The whole morning was wasted on the road.
On the way back to school, Wen Song always felt that he had missed something and didn't do anything. After thinking hard to the end, he finally had a flash of inspiration and blurted out: "Stop!"
"..."
People on the subway looked at him in unison, like looking at a not-so-bright child.
"I forgot to buy an iPad."
"...What?" Qin Qin took off the earphones.
"Go buy an iPad! Teacher Chengshi recommended me to use Procreate, saying that drawing is very convenient." Wen Song announced seriously, "From today onwards, I decided to stick to drawing."
Ever since he chatted with Cheng Shi via private message on the Internet and was encouraged, his enthusiasm for painting has never been higher.Fortunately, there is a directly-operated store near the school, and now it is not far to get off the bus and walk there.
After trying out the equipment, I chose Pro, went shopping for accessories and bought a pencil, and then downloaded and installed Procreate. With the whole set of equipment in hand, Wen Song’s confidence grew, and he consciously embarked on a new path, “I will work hard to draw of!"
Qin Qin couldn't help smiling, "Come on, little artist."
Opposite is the school.The two walked to the intersection, just in time for the traffic lights to change.The indicator light flashed, and the old man at the intersection strode off.He followed subconsciously, but was grabbed by Wen Song, "Wait a minute...it's a red light."
The old man in front of him crossed the sidewalk fearlessly, just in time to meet the traffic police on duty patrolling over, blowing his whistle to warn him, and stopped him on the side of the road to criticize education.
Qin Tan looked at the indicator light, "Ah...is that so." It turned out that the top light was on.
Wen Song felt that something was wrong with him: "You are acting weird today."
Qin Qin said, "Is there a day when I'm not weird?"
Clearly prevarication.Wen Song didn't stop thinking about exploring. To be honest, he could recall the first sight when he met at the bus station in the morning, and he still had a thoughtful expression when he walked into the school cafeteria.
Qin Qin urged, "Let's see what to eat first."
According to past experience, his attention shifted quickly, and he would forget what the last topic was when he was given food.
But obviously today is different.When it was time for dinner, there was no need to queue in the cafeteria. Wen Song ordered a bowl of beef noodles, sat down at the seat closest to the window, and continued to stare at him thoughtfully.
"..."
Qin Tan avoided looking, picked up the phone and swiped absently.
What the hell is wrong.
In the past, my thoughts jumped because I didn't talk about any important topics, and my attention passed away.Encountered a big problem today, Wen Song raised his hand and rubbed the tip of his nose, thinking persistently, with the other hand resting on the newly bought iPad.
The prototype screen pattern on the packaging box is a colorful geometric pattern. He glanced at it inadvertently. Somehow, he remembered the gray pencil drawing that Qin Tan drew on the draft paper in class one day.
The beef noodles were ready quickly, and the aunt at the window called enthusiastically.
Wen Song got up to serve it, and when he came back, he put down the bowl and said solemnly, "Qin Tan, I have a question for you."
Qin Qin raised his head and heard him ask, "Look at that aunt who makes beef noodles, tell me, what color is the apron she's wearing?"
"..."
Qin Qin was speechless. He neither looked at his aunt nor him. His eyes fell on the phone again, pretending that he hadn't heard anything to evade the fact.
After wasting a minute pretending, looking back, Wen Song was still standing by the table and staring at him aggressively.He had the aura to wait for his answer even if he stood there until sunset and dark.
You can't hide it, you can't hide it.Qin Qin pursed his lips straight, feeling frustrated and restless, "You really..."
smart.
"Is it a symptom of your depression?"
Guessing that he got a positive response, Wen Song suddenly became nervous, pushed the bowl away from him and approached him, forgetting that the table had not been wiped, and shook his finger in front of him, "Then why are you running out today! There will be Any other symptoms? How many are these?"
"..."
Qin Qin lowered his gaze, and his fingertips hidden under the table trembled uneasily, like a good student who was caught skipping class for the first time, half of his ears were red.
Some people can see you next time.Some people can't wait to go to him as soon as they open their eyes.
How do you say, "I just want to see you"?
He was silent for a long time before he had the courage to raise his eyes to respond to Wen Song's gaze.
"I just... want to come out and see."
Wen Song's eyebrows were tangled into a ball.
He didn't like the way Qin Tan looked at him now, gray and cautious, as if he was not a living person, but something illusory and hard to get.
Before he could say the next sentence, Qin Tan's cell phone rang.After picking up the phone, he only answered a few words well and then hung up, "...I have to go."
"Where?"
"A friend was on a business trip temporarily, and asked me to take care of him at the convenience store for a long time."
Wen Song frowned even tighter, dissatisfied, "You shouldn't work when you're sick, you should have a good rest."
"Then I have to rest all year round." Qin Qin said helplessly, "Most people in the real world have to work, young master."
Wen Song has lived a life of solitude since he was a child, and his thinking is often ungrounded.Hearing this, he quickly reflected and said, "Then I'll go with you. Anyway, I don't have anything to do in the afternoon."
"No...he didn't say when he would be back, and I might get off work very late."
"I don't go back to the dormitory, there is no access control."
Wen Song watched him pick up the chopsticks, "But I have to finish the noodles first, and I will eat faster."
"..."
Qin Qin just stood up, stood stiff for a few seconds, and then sat back as if compromising.
"It's okay to eat slowly."
Wen Song responded vaguely, still eating quickly.
When I saw him in the morning, I thought it was already in the intermission, and I wondered how it ended so quickly this time.
Only then did I figure it out.Turns out it wasn't over at all.
Wen Song knows that the depression period is often next to the manic period, and it stands to reason that it is the time when he is unwilling to go out.
In such a state, I still wander around alone. Could it be that I am bored at home?
Wen Song is not sure, the state of each patient is very different.When he was a child, he saw Wen Qing lying on the bed in Yu Qi and ignoring everyone, crying alone for two or three days without eating or drinking; he also saw her walk out of the house without saying a word, and walk to the supermarket ten kilometers away from the house to buy food. an orange.
After all, it is an abnormal state.In his heart, the current Qin Qin can't even take care of himself when crossing the road, and he still has to go to a convenience store to help some friend watch the door.
He subconsciously thought that the friend Qin Qin was talking about was Song Qingran, and only when he went to the place to listen to their conversation did he know that the other party was a friend in Boss Chen's band, surnamed Xu.There was something wrong with another store, and they drove away in a hurry after a brief handover.
"He taught me to play bass." Qin Tan said, "He is a very good bass player."
He is also a small convenience store owner who is running around for a living.
Wen Song couldn't empathize with this.The price of the equipment he just acquired is in five figures, which may be two or three months' salary of ordinary people.But to him, it was just a toy that he stopped by to buy on a whim.
The street where the convenience store is located is not busy, and there is not much traffic in the afternoon.Qin Qin tidied up the shelves and stayed behind the cash register.He sat on the high stool by the window and turned on the iPad, fumbled for the software he had just downloaded, and drew on the screen.
In the small storefront, the two of them were busy with their own tasks, but they were both a little absent-minded—or rather, a little overwhelmed.
Qin Qin couldn't open his mouth to drive him home, so he could only hope that Boss Xu would come back soon.I am happy that he is here, but also feel that I should not run out to meet him at all.
Regret and rejoicing are pulling more and more intensely in the bottom of my heart.
He didn't understand where he got the courage to go to Wen Song to gain a sense of existence.Obviously nothing can be said, nothing can be done.Everything he said and everything he did was a waste of Wen Song's time.
In the short few seconds during this period, he slightly realized that his thoughts were too extreme and lost without basis.But it was just a few seconds of breathlessness, followed by even more desperate self-denial and questioning.
Everything in the field of vision is gray.The silhouette of Wen Song bowing his head and painting is terrifyingly far away.
They didn't speak a word all afternoon.
Until the sky gradually dimmed, Wen Song turned off the iPad, "It's out of battery."
There are plugs in the store, and there are mobile power banks available for rent at the cashier.Qin Tan could have reminded him, but all the thoughts circling in his mind were "he doesn't need it" and "he doesn't care".He just didn't say a word, and he didn't want to look annoying by talking too much.
After holding back all afternoon, Wen Song finally came up with an excuse to raise the topic, who would have thought that the silence would come so naturally.
Qin Qin didn't even raise his eyes, he raised his voice bravely, "Well... If Boss Xu doesn't come back, do we have to have dinner here?"
He asked a question.Is it a question?Listening tones are...questions that need to be answered.
Qin Qin finally said, "You can go out to eat."
Afraid that his tone would be too blunt, he quickly added, "Eat...something you like."
Qin Qin thought he would dislike the food in the convenience store.But he browsed among the rows of shelves, picking out dinner with great interest, "No need to go outside, I like convenience stores."
Bread, rice balls, and drinks.You can make a dinner out of just a few of them.There is also hot oden.Wen Song packed a few strings in a paper cup, looked at the people who were busy heating rice balls and bread, and said in a tone of declaring the principle of peaceful coexistence, "You invite me to eat. In this way, I will forgive you for ignoring me for so many days. "
He vaguely realized that Qin Qin was away from home on the weekend to take a good rest and go to school, maybe that's why he came to him.
Qin Qin didn't intend to alienate him on purpose, because he was trapped in a state of escapism, which made his reaction different from the usual one.
Even because of treating him like this, Qin Tan will feel even more disappointed in himself.
I can't get angry at all when I think about it.
With the fake action of painting, Wen Song struggled all afternoon.He needed a reason, a symbolic move, for Qin Qin to end this dark guilt.
Although the one in front of me is a bit lame, but thinking about the excuse of "buy me a drink" downstairs in the dormitory last time, it's not very clever. up.
It worked fine last time, so it should work this time too.
Qin Tan seemed to be guided, and immediately nodded seriously, holding the hot bread and rice balls to his side, pointing to the skewers filled with holes in the stove: "You can eat them all."
"..."
That's not necessary.
Wen Song had a premonition that Boss Xu might arrive in the middle of the night, so he was not in a hurry to eat, and was thinking about how to understand the problem before him.
It can't always be like this: Qin Qin suddenly disappears, and he returns a few days full of guilt, and then he finds an excuse to ease the relationship.
He can wait for Qin Tan to get better before coming back without being angry.He can understand, so he can turn this cycle into a habit without thinking about it.
But Qin Qin's guilt will not stop, and may even stack up. Every time he doves against him, it will become the nutrient for the next depression to breed pain, and it will become a terrible vicious circle.
After much deliberation, it is best not to cycle.
"I think you should quit smoking."
Wen Song held the rice ball and bit it down, and the smell of tuna exploded from the rice, "You smoked when something went wrong these two times, think about it."
"Nightclubs may also have an impact. It's better to go less in the future."
It is necessary to screen one by one to exclude unfavorable factors and reduce the probability of occurrence, at least the frequency.Wen Song took an academic attitude to seriously consider and discuss the issue, but Qin Qin only said yes.Say yes to whatever he says.
When it came to eating up two of the rice balls, Wen Song remembered to ask, "Aren't you going to eat dinner?"
Qin Qin shook his head, "I don't want to eat."
"But you didn't eat at noon."
In a hurry at noon, Wen Song devoured the bowl of noodles, and Wen Song didn't notice anything else. Only then did he remember that Qin Tan was just waiting by the side.
Looking back, when Qin Qin took him to eat breakfast, he just stayed by the side - at that time, he thought that Qin Qin had already eaten before he appeared at the school gate, "Didn't you eat breakfast?"
Qin Qin noticed that he was a little angry.When he spoke again, his tone was much lower, but the same sentence was still repeated, "I don't want to eat."
"Then I'm going to change my mouth."
Wen Song picked up the warm chocolate meal bag in his hand and threw it to him, "What you just said doesn't count, I will forgive you only after eating this."
"..."
Qin Qin caught it.Smelling the sweet and greasy smell through the packaging bag, my stomach churned.
The medicines taken during the day to avoid Wen Song and go to the bathroom have significant side effects, loss of appetite is just one of them.Even though the time to take the medicine at night has passed, the effect of the medicine has faded, but the weakened appetite has not returned.
Wen Song didn't know, he just thought he should eat food to maintain his body's nutritional supply.
Wen Song is thinking of him.He couldn't live up to such kindness.
Wen Song is right.
Qin Qin tore open the packaging bag and took a hard bite.
Wen Song could see it from a distance of two or three meters. Such a big tear fell from his eye and hit his hand. He was so frightened that he slid off the chair and ran over, "Don't...is the bread so bad?"
"..."
A customer opened the door and came in. Seeing the weird situation of the two people at the cash register, they didn't buy anything, and then silently backed out.
Not the bread's fault.
Qin Qin shook his head, suppressed his nausea and swallowed, unconsciously exerted force with his fingers, and the bread was kneaded into cakes.
Wen Song wanted to wipe his face for him, another tear fell on the back of his hand, and a small splash was made, and he hurriedly comforted him, "Don't, if you are seen by a guest, you think I'm bullying you... Don't, don't eat it, don't you?" Eat it, give it to me."
He snatched the bread and threw it aside. Seeing that Qin Qin was silent with red eyes, he didn't know how to persuade him, "I was teasing you just now. I'm not mad at you at all... It's not that I'm not mad at you at all." , That is, anyway, I am not angry with you now! I was wrong! It is my fault, I should not force you to eat! I am guilty!"
"..."
Qin Qin was not amused by him, turned around to calm down for a while, and then whispered in a hoarse voice, "You can't tease me at this time. I have a glass heart, and I can't stand it."
"……"I can tell.
Wen Song raised his fist and solemnly swore: "Then I will never do this again."
Even though it was just a small matter about a piece of bread, it actually caused a sense of confusion.After Wen Song comforted him with pale words, he ate the culprit in two or three mouthfuls.He sat back and continued to eat his skewers, not daring to force him to eat any more.
The handsome man weeps, and the heart breaks when he sees it.
Sure enough, Boss Xu hadn't come back until late at night.Wen Song didn't even bother to play with his mobile phone. He glanced at the cashier from time to time, and finally dozed off on the small bar table.
Qin Tan looked at him intently.It's unbelievable that this young master from a rich family is willing to accompany him to work in a convenience store in the middle of the night.
Why would someone be willing to stay with him like this and accommodate him in such a small and uncomfortable place.
Those comforting words are indeed pale, especially for those who are used to them, they are completely irrelevant.
But Wen Song ate the bread he bit into.
Why is it that the joy and satisfaction surging in the heart of the most ordinary things among friends frightened him.
Until Boss Xu returned to the store to hand over, and they arrived downstairs in the community where Wen Song lived, his mind was still immersed in these outrageous "whys", and he vaguely heard Wen Song's exhortation:
"Then when you feel hungry, remember to eat."
He wanted to touch that gray face, but he didn't even raise his hand, thinking that Wen Song would definitely not accept it.
"I will remember."
"Call me when you get to the dormitory, or send me a WeChat message."
What Wen Song thinks he is worried, "Why don't I send you back."
Qin Qin subconsciously said no.I can't remember how many times I refused on the way back, I just remember that Wen Song hates walking alone at night, "You go back first."
Wen Song sighed.When I was about to go upstairs, I turned around and asked, "Can I have dinner with you tomorrow night?"
In case he still can't eat anything when the time comes, at least find a restaurant he likes, maybe it will help.
Qin Tan nodded, his eyes still glued to him.
Wen Song watched anxiously, held his face with both hands and kneaded it twice, "Be good. Don't stay outside, remember to tell me when you get to the dormitory."
Qin Tan touched his cheek, keeping it in mind.I went back to the dormitory and made a phone call, sent a WeChat message, took photos, and even played a video for him to watch.Really well behaved.
Wen Song praised him dumbfoundedly and asked him to take a good rest.
After hanging up the video, the people on both ends of the call fell asleep.
This is the end of a chaotic day.
At the same time, the chaotic thoughts were cut off.
**
At noon the next day, when Qin Tan woke up from a headache, he realized that he had fallen asleep.
When you open your eyes, you can see the white ceiling of the staff dormitory.Sitting up, the quilt that was lifted was washed into an old gray-blue color.
He froze for a moment, quickly got out of bed and walked out with his slippers on. Everything in the bar was as usual.The tables and chairs are all warm wood colors, the drum set on the stage is covered with a layer of colorful graffiti, the bass is dark green, and the guitar is brown red.
Go out again, open the window, the sky is blue and the sun is shining.
In Qin Qin's mind, the gray that almost drowned him twelve hours ago slowly faded away.
But what happened in yesterday's gray world was more and more vividly seared into his memory.
I want to die with shame.
The author has something to say: come late
It still doesn't feel right
Adjusted the plot and made it comfortable
So I didn't see my parents today
also lost little red flower
嘤
In addition, in order to help everyone distinguish the state more intuitively, the manic period is rich in color, and the gloomy period’s vision is gray. The plot is purely fictitious and cannot be used as a reference.I still want to remind everyone that if you feel unwell in reality, you should seek medical treatment in time!
Goodnight everybody
mua!
感谢在2021-06-1123:32:27~2021-06-1301:09:15期间为我投出霸王票或灌溉营养液的小天使哦~
Thanks to the little angel who threw the mine: 12 serving with warm water;
Thanks to the little angels of the irrigation nutrient solution: 5 bottles of la la la spicy; 2 bottles of Nyatopu;
Thank you very much for your support, I will continue to work hard!
Song Li Song Qi.
This is too deliberate, Wen Song thought, it was just to please people.But to him, this kind of nonsense nonsense is more convincing than clear factual arguments.
Even if he knew it was intentional, Mengdian was poked to death.
He still took the umbrella, and when he walked out of the subway station, he disliked plausibly, "There are not even dark clouds, and the sky is not dark. It will definitely not rain."
Qin Qin didn't argue, just said, "It will be done."
There was still one kilometer away from the entrance of the park, and before I had walked halfway, the rain fell from the sky.
Wen Song: "..."
Terrible, even God listened to him.
There are bushes on the side of the road, only railings and trash cans, and there is no need to think about what else can keep out the rain.Wen Song opened the umbrella in his hand convinced, "Why are you more accurate than the weather forecast?"
The umbrella blooms a transparent flower above the head.Qin Qin said naturally, "I grew up here."
He is very familiar with the weather of this city, just like a dragonfly will fly low without a weather forecast. Autumn in City C is rainy.But unlike the gust of wind and rain that I encountered last time when I went to Lingsong Temple, today's rain is not heavy.The fine rain is continuous, falling gently on the umbrella surface with almost no sound, and it doesn't affect the walk too much.
Visiting the garden in the rain is quite artistic.Wen Song originally came with a mission. He came in for a stroll, and was also attracted by the well-maintained garden scenery, so he took a lot of photos.
In the garden, the green shade overlaps, the winding paths lead to secluded places, and the environment is quiet and elegant.Before I came here, I didn't expect that this former residence of a celebrity is a small manor.The owner of the garden is a patriot who contributed to the country during the war with remarkable achievements.There are stories of his life on the doorways of houses or on notice boards in various places in the garden.
Wen Song took these photos and sent them to the homework group to complete the task. He also took a lot of bonsai and flower trees.Holding an umbrella in one hand and a mobile phone in the other, he is very busy.
He just doesn't care about the people around him.
After entering the garden, Qin Qin stayed beside him quietly, his presence was not as strong as that of a tree.After following along for a while, it seemed wrong to always do this and watch him take pictures, so he said lamely, "Thinking class...does it take so much material to make a ppt?"
"No, but I like flowers." Wen Song glanced at him and said confidently, "Is there a problem?"
"No problem." Qin Tan answered immediately, "I like flowers too."
Who are you kidding?Wen Song snorted unmoved, remembering the old debt, "You obviously threw away the flowers sent by others."
Qin Qin froze for a moment, paused for a few seconds before realizing what he was talking about, and patched up stubbornly: "I just don't like the flowers sent by others, and the ones that grow in the field are okay."
"..."
Wen Song wanted to hum him again to show his indifference, but unfortunately he couldn't hold back after holding back, and was still amused.
The handsome guy's overtures are really irresistible.
Seeing him smile, Qin Qin's expression relaxed, "You have been unhappy today."
I don't know if it was because of the group members who suddenly missed the appointment, or because of an accident last week.The truth should be that there are both, but in Qin Qin's heart, the sense of guilt is infinitely magnified, and when he sees him frowning or sighing, he feels that it is his fault.It was a bit tormenting to be by his side with an almost atonement-like mind.
Wen Song didn't know, and proudly said, "You even like flowers, if I don't cooperate with you to smile, it will appear that my EQ is very low."
It took 10 minutes to take pictures, and it took three hours to go back and forth. The whole morning was wasted on the road.
On the way back to school, Wen Song always felt that he had missed something and didn't do anything. After thinking hard to the end, he finally had a flash of inspiration and blurted out: "Stop!"
"..."
People on the subway looked at him in unison, like looking at a not-so-bright child.
"I forgot to buy an iPad."
"...What?" Qin Qin took off the earphones.
"Go buy an iPad! Teacher Chengshi recommended me to use Procreate, saying that drawing is very convenient." Wen Song announced seriously, "From today onwards, I decided to stick to drawing."
Ever since he chatted with Cheng Shi via private message on the Internet and was encouraged, his enthusiasm for painting has never been higher.Fortunately, there is a directly-operated store near the school, and now it is not far to get off the bus and walk there.
After trying out the equipment, I chose Pro, went shopping for accessories and bought a pencil, and then downloaded and installed Procreate. With the whole set of equipment in hand, Wen Song’s confidence grew, and he consciously embarked on a new path, “I will work hard to draw of!"
Qin Qin couldn't help smiling, "Come on, little artist."
Opposite is the school.The two walked to the intersection, just in time for the traffic lights to change.The indicator light flashed, and the old man at the intersection strode off.He followed subconsciously, but was grabbed by Wen Song, "Wait a minute...it's a red light."
The old man in front of him crossed the sidewalk fearlessly, just in time to meet the traffic police on duty patrolling over, blowing his whistle to warn him, and stopped him on the side of the road to criticize education.
Qin Tan looked at the indicator light, "Ah...is that so." It turned out that the top light was on.
Wen Song felt that something was wrong with him: "You are acting weird today."
Qin Qin said, "Is there a day when I'm not weird?"
Clearly prevarication.Wen Song didn't stop thinking about exploring. To be honest, he could recall the first sight when he met at the bus station in the morning, and he still had a thoughtful expression when he walked into the school cafeteria.
Qin Qin urged, "Let's see what to eat first."
According to past experience, his attention shifted quickly, and he would forget what the last topic was when he was given food.
But obviously today is different.When it was time for dinner, there was no need to queue in the cafeteria. Wen Song ordered a bowl of beef noodles, sat down at the seat closest to the window, and continued to stare at him thoughtfully.
"..."
Qin Tan avoided looking, picked up the phone and swiped absently.
What the hell is wrong.
In the past, my thoughts jumped because I didn't talk about any important topics, and my attention passed away.Encountered a big problem today, Wen Song raised his hand and rubbed the tip of his nose, thinking persistently, with the other hand resting on the newly bought iPad.
The prototype screen pattern on the packaging box is a colorful geometric pattern. He glanced at it inadvertently. Somehow, he remembered the gray pencil drawing that Qin Tan drew on the draft paper in class one day.
The beef noodles were ready quickly, and the aunt at the window called enthusiastically.
Wen Song got up to serve it, and when he came back, he put down the bowl and said solemnly, "Qin Tan, I have a question for you."
Qin Qin raised his head and heard him ask, "Look at that aunt who makes beef noodles, tell me, what color is the apron she's wearing?"
"..."
Qin Qin was speechless. He neither looked at his aunt nor him. His eyes fell on the phone again, pretending that he hadn't heard anything to evade the fact.
After wasting a minute pretending, looking back, Wen Song was still standing by the table and staring at him aggressively.He had the aura to wait for his answer even if he stood there until sunset and dark.
You can't hide it, you can't hide it.Qin Qin pursed his lips straight, feeling frustrated and restless, "You really..."
smart.
"Is it a symptom of your depression?"
Guessing that he got a positive response, Wen Song suddenly became nervous, pushed the bowl away from him and approached him, forgetting that the table had not been wiped, and shook his finger in front of him, "Then why are you running out today! There will be Any other symptoms? How many are these?"
"..."
Qin Qin lowered his gaze, and his fingertips hidden under the table trembled uneasily, like a good student who was caught skipping class for the first time, half of his ears were red.
Some people can see you next time.Some people can't wait to go to him as soon as they open their eyes.
How do you say, "I just want to see you"?
He was silent for a long time before he had the courage to raise his eyes to respond to Wen Song's gaze.
"I just... want to come out and see."
Wen Song's eyebrows were tangled into a ball.
He didn't like the way Qin Tan looked at him now, gray and cautious, as if he was not a living person, but something illusory and hard to get.
Before he could say the next sentence, Qin Tan's cell phone rang.After picking up the phone, he only answered a few words well and then hung up, "...I have to go."
"Where?"
"A friend was on a business trip temporarily, and asked me to take care of him at the convenience store for a long time."
Wen Song frowned even tighter, dissatisfied, "You shouldn't work when you're sick, you should have a good rest."
"Then I have to rest all year round." Qin Qin said helplessly, "Most people in the real world have to work, young master."
Wen Song has lived a life of solitude since he was a child, and his thinking is often ungrounded.Hearing this, he quickly reflected and said, "Then I'll go with you. Anyway, I don't have anything to do in the afternoon."
"No...he didn't say when he would be back, and I might get off work very late."
"I don't go back to the dormitory, there is no access control."
Wen Song watched him pick up the chopsticks, "But I have to finish the noodles first, and I will eat faster."
"..."
Qin Qin just stood up, stood stiff for a few seconds, and then sat back as if compromising.
"It's okay to eat slowly."
Wen Song responded vaguely, still eating quickly.
When I saw him in the morning, I thought it was already in the intermission, and I wondered how it ended so quickly this time.
Only then did I figure it out.Turns out it wasn't over at all.
Wen Song knows that the depression period is often next to the manic period, and it stands to reason that it is the time when he is unwilling to go out.
In such a state, I still wander around alone. Could it be that I am bored at home?
Wen Song is not sure, the state of each patient is very different.When he was a child, he saw Wen Qing lying on the bed in Yu Qi and ignoring everyone, crying alone for two or three days without eating or drinking; he also saw her walk out of the house without saying a word, and walk to the supermarket ten kilometers away from the house to buy food. an orange.
After all, it is an abnormal state.In his heart, the current Qin Qin can't even take care of himself when crossing the road, and he still has to go to a convenience store to help some friend watch the door.
He subconsciously thought that the friend Qin Qin was talking about was Song Qingran, and only when he went to the place to listen to their conversation did he know that the other party was a friend in Boss Chen's band, surnamed Xu.There was something wrong with another store, and they drove away in a hurry after a brief handover.
"He taught me to play bass." Qin Tan said, "He is a very good bass player."
He is also a small convenience store owner who is running around for a living.
Wen Song couldn't empathize with this.The price of the equipment he just acquired is in five figures, which may be two or three months' salary of ordinary people.But to him, it was just a toy that he stopped by to buy on a whim.
The street where the convenience store is located is not busy, and there is not much traffic in the afternoon.Qin Qin tidied up the shelves and stayed behind the cash register.He sat on the high stool by the window and turned on the iPad, fumbled for the software he had just downloaded, and drew on the screen.
In the small storefront, the two of them were busy with their own tasks, but they were both a little absent-minded—or rather, a little overwhelmed.
Qin Qin couldn't open his mouth to drive him home, so he could only hope that Boss Xu would come back soon.I am happy that he is here, but also feel that I should not run out to meet him at all.
Regret and rejoicing are pulling more and more intensely in the bottom of my heart.
He didn't understand where he got the courage to go to Wen Song to gain a sense of existence.Obviously nothing can be said, nothing can be done.Everything he said and everything he did was a waste of Wen Song's time.
In the short few seconds during this period, he slightly realized that his thoughts were too extreme and lost without basis.But it was just a few seconds of breathlessness, followed by even more desperate self-denial and questioning.
Everything in the field of vision is gray.The silhouette of Wen Song bowing his head and painting is terrifyingly far away.
They didn't speak a word all afternoon.
Until the sky gradually dimmed, Wen Song turned off the iPad, "It's out of battery."
There are plugs in the store, and there are mobile power banks available for rent at the cashier.Qin Tan could have reminded him, but all the thoughts circling in his mind were "he doesn't need it" and "he doesn't care".He just didn't say a word, and he didn't want to look annoying by talking too much.
After holding back all afternoon, Wen Song finally came up with an excuse to raise the topic, who would have thought that the silence would come so naturally.
Qin Qin didn't even raise his eyes, he raised his voice bravely, "Well... If Boss Xu doesn't come back, do we have to have dinner here?"
He asked a question.Is it a question?Listening tones are...questions that need to be answered.
Qin Qin finally said, "You can go out to eat."
Afraid that his tone would be too blunt, he quickly added, "Eat...something you like."
Qin Qin thought he would dislike the food in the convenience store.But he browsed among the rows of shelves, picking out dinner with great interest, "No need to go outside, I like convenience stores."
Bread, rice balls, and drinks.You can make a dinner out of just a few of them.There is also hot oden.Wen Song packed a few strings in a paper cup, looked at the people who were busy heating rice balls and bread, and said in a tone of declaring the principle of peaceful coexistence, "You invite me to eat. In this way, I will forgive you for ignoring me for so many days. "
He vaguely realized that Qin Qin was away from home on the weekend to take a good rest and go to school, maybe that's why he came to him.
Qin Qin didn't intend to alienate him on purpose, because he was trapped in a state of escapism, which made his reaction different from the usual one.
Even because of treating him like this, Qin Tan will feel even more disappointed in himself.
I can't get angry at all when I think about it.
With the fake action of painting, Wen Song struggled all afternoon.He needed a reason, a symbolic move, for Qin Qin to end this dark guilt.
Although the one in front of me is a bit lame, but thinking about the excuse of "buy me a drink" downstairs in the dormitory last time, it's not very clever. up.
It worked fine last time, so it should work this time too.
Qin Tan seemed to be guided, and immediately nodded seriously, holding the hot bread and rice balls to his side, pointing to the skewers filled with holes in the stove: "You can eat them all."
"..."
That's not necessary.
Wen Song had a premonition that Boss Xu might arrive in the middle of the night, so he was not in a hurry to eat, and was thinking about how to understand the problem before him.
It can't always be like this: Qin Qin suddenly disappears, and he returns a few days full of guilt, and then he finds an excuse to ease the relationship.
He can wait for Qin Tan to get better before coming back without being angry.He can understand, so he can turn this cycle into a habit without thinking about it.
But Qin Qin's guilt will not stop, and may even stack up. Every time he doves against him, it will become the nutrient for the next depression to breed pain, and it will become a terrible vicious circle.
After much deliberation, it is best not to cycle.
"I think you should quit smoking."
Wen Song held the rice ball and bit it down, and the smell of tuna exploded from the rice, "You smoked when something went wrong these two times, think about it."
"Nightclubs may also have an impact. It's better to go less in the future."
It is necessary to screen one by one to exclude unfavorable factors and reduce the probability of occurrence, at least the frequency.Wen Song took an academic attitude to seriously consider and discuss the issue, but Qin Qin only said yes.Say yes to whatever he says.
When it came to eating up two of the rice balls, Wen Song remembered to ask, "Aren't you going to eat dinner?"
Qin Qin shook his head, "I don't want to eat."
"But you didn't eat at noon."
In a hurry at noon, Wen Song devoured the bowl of noodles, and Wen Song didn't notice anything else. Only then did he remember that Qin Tan was just waiting by the side.
Looking back, when Qin Qin took him to eat breakfast, he just stayed by the side - at that time, he thought that Qin Qin had already eaten before he appeared at the school gate, "Didn't you eat breakfast?"
Qin Qin noticed that he was a little angry.When he spoke again, his tone was much lower, but the same sentence was still repeated, "I don't want to eat."
"Then I'm going to change my mouth."
Wen Song picked up the warm chocolate meal bag in his hand and threw it to him, "What you just said doesn't count, I will forgive you only after eating this."
"..."
Qin Qin caught it.Smelling the sweet and greasy smell through the packaging bag, my stomach churned.
The medicines taken during the day to avoid Wen Song and go to the bathroom have significant side effects, loss of appetite is just one of them.Even though the time to take the medicine at night has passed, the effect of the medicine has faded, but the weakened appetite has not returned.
Wen Song didn't know, he just thought he should eat food to maintain his body's nutritional supply.
Wen Song is thinking of him.He couldn't live up to such kindness.
Wen Song is right.
Qin Qin tore open the packaging bag and took a hard bite.
Wen Song could see it from a distance of two or three meters. Such a big tear fell from his eye and hit his hand. He was so frightened that he slid off the chair and ran over, "Don't...is the bread so bad?"
"..."
A customer opened the door and came in. Seeing the weird situation of the two people at the cash register, they didn't buy anything, and then silently backed out.
Not the bread's fault.
Qin Qin shook his head, suppressed his nausea and swallowed, unconsciously exerted force with his fingers, and the bread was kneaded into cakes.
Wen Song wanted to wipe his face for him, another tear fell on the back of his hand, and a small splash was made, and he hurriedly comforted him, "Don't, if you are seen by a guest, you think I'm bullying you... Don't, don't eat it, don't you?" Eat it, give it to me."
He snatched the bread and threw it aside. Seeing that Qin Qin was silent with red eyes, he didn't know how to persuade him, "I was teasing you just now. I'm not mad at you at all... It's not that I'm not mad at you at all." , That is, anyway, I am not angry with you now! I was wrong! It is my fault, I should not force you to eat! I am guilty!"
"..."
Qin Qin was not amused by him, turned around to calm down for a while, and then whispered in a hoarse voice, "You can't tease me at this time. I have a glass heart, and I can't stand it."
"……"I can tell.
Wen Song raised his fist and solemnly swore: "Then I will never do this again."
Even though it was just a small matter about a piece of bread, it actually caused a sense of confusion.After Wen Song comforted him with pale words, he ate the culprit in two or three mouthfuls.He sat back and continued to eat his skewers, not daring to force him to eat any more.
The handsome man weeps, and the heart breaks when he sees it.
Sure enough, Boss Xu hadn't come back until late at night.Wen Song didn't even bother to play with his mobile phone. He glanced at the cashier from time to time, and finally dozed off on the small bar table.
Qin Tan looked at him intently.It's unbelievable that this young master from a rich family is willing to accompany him to work in a convenience store in the middle of the night.
Why would someone be willing to stay with him like this and accommodate him in such a small and uncomfortable place.
Those comforting words are indeed pale, especially for those who are used to them, they are completely irrelevant.
But Wen Song ate the bread he bit into.
Why is it that the joy and satisfaction surging in the heart of the most ordinary things among friends frightened him.
Until Boss Xu returned to the store to hand over, and they arrived downstairs in the community where Wen Song lived, his mind was still immersed in these outrageous "whys", and he vaguely heard Wen Song's exhortation:
"Then when you feel hungry, remember to eat."
He wanted to touch that gray face, but he didn't even raise his hand, thinking that Wen Song would definitely not accept it.
"I will remember."
"Call me when you get to the dormitory, or send me a WeChat message."
What Wen Song thinks he is worried, "Why don't I send you back."
Qin Qin subconsciously said no.I can't remember how many times I refused on the way back, I just remember that Wen Song hates walking alone at night, "You go back first."
Wen Song sighed.When I was about to go upstairs, I turned around and asked, "Can I have dinner with you tomorrow night?"
In case he still can't eat anything when the time comes, at least find a restaurant he likes, maybe it will help.
Qin Tan nodded, his eyes still glued to him.
Wen Song watched anxiously, held his face with both hands and kneaded it twice, "Be good. Don't stay outside, remember to tell me when you get to the dormitory."
Qin Tan touched his cheek, keeping it in mind.I went back to the dormitory and made a phone call, sent a WeChat message, took photos, and even played a video for him to watch.Really well behaved.
Wen Song praised him dumbfoundedly and asked him to take a good rest.
After hanging up the video, the people on both ends of the call fell asleep.
This is the end of a chaotic day.
At the same time, the chaotic thoughts were cut off.
**
At noon the next day, when Qin Tan woke up from a headache, he realized that he had fallen asleep.
When you open your eyes, you can see the white ceiling of the staff dormitory.Sitting up, the quilt that was lifted was washed into an old gray-blue color.
He froze for a moment, quickly got out of bed and walked out with his slippers on. Everything in the bar was as usual.The tables and chairs are all warm wood colors, the drum set on the stage is covered with a layer of colorful graffiti, the bass is dark green, and the guitar is brown red.
Go out again, open the window, the sky is blue and the sun is shining.
In Qin Qin's mind, the gray that almost drowned him twelve hours ago slowly faded away.
But what happened in yesterday's gray world was more and more vividly seared into his memory.
I want to die with shame.
The author has something to say: come late
It still doesn't feel right
Adjusted the plot and made it comfortable
So I didn't see my parents today
also lost little red flower
嘤
In addition, in order to help everyone distinguish the state more intuitively, the manic period is rich in color, and the gloomy period’s vision is gray. The plot is purely fictitious and cannot be used as a reference.I still want to remind everyone that if you feel unwell in reality, you should seek medical treatment in time!
Goodnight everybody
mua!
感谢在2021-06-1123:32:27~2021-06-1301:09:15期间为我投出霸王票或灌溉营养液的小天使哦~
Thanks to the little angel who threw the mine: 12 serving with warm water;
Thanks to the little angels of the irrigation nutrient solution: 5 bottles of la la la spicy; 2 bottles of Nyatopu;
Thank you very much for your support, I will continue to work hard!
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