prefer silence

At five o'clock in the morning, Yu Qingshan and I walked through the alleys with twists and turns. This small town is really small, and we walked there in about half an hour.

Along the way, there were a few sporadic people who were traveling together, and they were also carrying travel bags. They were probably photographers like Yu Qingshan.

By the time we arrived at the lotus pond, the sky was already mostly bright.There is a breeze blowing across the pond, which is very comfortable.The lotus in the lotus pond is not fully bloomed, and the lotus can't be seen at a glance, which is really beautiful.

After I helped Yu Qingshan set up the bracket, he began to adjust the angle. I didn't understand these at all, so I had to watch from the side.

I took a landscape photo with my mobile phone and sent it to Chen Zheng. He was probably still sleeping at this time. After thinking about it, I sent another selfie and left a message:

【Brother Zheng, do you miss me? 】

The ponds were criss-crossed, and I walked around along the path, thinking about what I was going to do today.

It was almost seven o'clock when Aoyama shot the material.Talking about the lovely little grandson of the proprietress of the hotel on the way, I sighed, "I want to raise a child too, but unfortunately Chen Zheng is not very willing."

Yu Qingshan said with a smile: "I can probably guess what he's thinking. He must think that it's exhausting enough to support you once, and he can't stand the second one."

I seriously asked him: "You feel your conscience and say, do I really look like a naive person?"

Yu Qingshan replied to me: "It's not very childish, but your temper and temperament sometimes reveal a very naive and childish side. There are many kinds of childishness. Some people are selfish and childish, but you are kind and childish. Not much harm."

This is the first time I have heard this statement, and I asked curiously: "Then what is selfish childishness?"

Yu Qingshan glanced at me, and took out a pack of cigarettes from his pocket, "Would you like one?"

I took out one, and he smiled, "I thought you couldn't smoke." Then he took out a lighter and lit it for me, and he took one himself.

"I once knew a girl with a very sweet smile and a little self-willed personality, but her self-willedness is very pleasing, and most people are willing to tolerate her. She pursued me, but I have a wife. I rejected her repeatedly, and she still It was very wronged, and finally she found my wife."

"This is selfish and naive. She only considers her own feelings and thinks that others should revolve around her."

There was a lot of information in the words, and I was surprised: "Brother Yu, are you married?" Yu Qingshan seemed to be carefree, walking around all day, he really didn't seem like a person with a stable family.

Yu Qingshan gave a "hmm" and didn't say anything more.

I could see that he was not in the right mood, and I suspected that I had stepped into a minefield, so I followed in silence.

After a while, Yu Qingshan said: "She has passed away."

"I've been away for two years. She died because of illness. She and I are not considered husband and wife anymore. We are divorced. She knew that she would not live long, so she lied to me... She didn't want a child, so she wanted to divorce me."

"After the divorce, I hated her all the time. I blocked her after seeing some pictures of travel check-in she posted in Moments every day. She wanted to call me one last time before she left, but I didn't receive it."

"Our daughter was only four years old when she left. I asked my mother where she was every day, and I sent her back to her grandmother's house. I am sorry for her, my daughter, and no one else. If I had refused more firmly , don’t let her misunderstand, maybe, I can accompany her through the last part of the journey.”

"I'm such a rotten person."

Yu Qingshan's eyes were bloodshot, and tears ran across the side of his face, it was very faint, it was a thin water mark, and it disappeared after passing by.Such a happy and frank person like him can't even notice crying.I was at a loss and wanted to comfort him, but I didn't know how to comfort him.

I didn't expect him to have such a past, those foolishness and indifference, isn't that also a kind of cover-up?

Most things in the world are like this, there are always regrets, unwillingness, and regrets.

Between two souls, it is not easy to go from falling in love to getting married, and it is even more difficult to manage after marriage.

Chen Zheng and I have also experienced many ups and downs, but we still have opportunities to make up and get in touch after going around, but Yu Qingshan has no more.

Back at the hotel, we had breakfast together, Yu Qingshan still looked very depressed, he said he was going back to catch up on sleep, I sent him upstairs and went directly to the vegetable market.

The vegetable market in the town is not big, and the stalls are neatly lined up one by one. I slipped around from the beginning to the end, trying to find a woman who might be Fangfang.

Fangfang should be 33 years old this year and has a child.A vague shadow was outlined in my mind, and I cast my eyes on the middle-aged women with children at the vegetable stand, and finally I was attracted by a woman with a fair face and a slim figure.

The woman was yelling with her arms akimbo: "White, plump and juicy cabbage! I just picked it this morning! It will be sold out soon!"

Sitting at her feet was a chubby little girl who was playing games with her mobile phone.

I walked over and asked the woman, "How do you sell this cabbage?"

The woman handed me one and said enthusiastically, "One dollar and six cents. If you buy it, I'll count it one dollar and five cents for you. I think you have a very kind face."

The aunt next to me immediately greeted me: "Young man, if you come to me, I will also give you a dollar and fifty cents. Don't believe her, she tells everyone that."

The woman raised her chest and snorted, "It's agreed that you can't steal business, what are you doing?"

The aunt replied unceremoniously: "Meifang, you can't say that. Don't lie to me and I won't say anything. Your cabbage is obviously old. Sprinkle some water and it will be fresh?"

The aunt said again: "Young man, are you a foreigner? You look fair and handsome, unlike our boys here, who are all black and black. Come and buy from me, don't be deceived."

I thanked my aunt for her kindness in my heart, but I said: "It's okay, I just like old cabbage, it's just right."

The aunt gave me a strange look and said nothing more.

I picked two Chinese cabbages from the woman's stand, and the woman weighed them up for me, put them in a plastic bag and handed them to me.I couldn't help asking: "Sister, how are you doing?"

She was confused, and replied: "It's not bad, it's 15 yuan in total."

Carrying the cabbage, I almost ran away, without even daring to look back.

Although I don't know what Fangfang looks like now, but the first time I saw her, I had an indescribable feeling of wanting to get close to her.

This feeling tells me that she is Fangfang.

And, if I heard correctly, the aunt next to her called her "Mei Fang"...

She looks energetic, and her daughter is also very healthy. She doesn't look like she is enduring hardships. Most of my suspenseful heart has dropped, and I began to secretly plan to return to City A.

……

Chen Zheng texted me back around seven o'clock.

【Where did you go to play?How are things going? 】

[I miss you, Yuanyuan baby. 】

The last one is a voice message.

This slightly sweet title makes me feel happy. Chen Zheng has become more and more talkative recently. I wonder if he secretly attended the class behind my back.

I replied to him:

[There is a lotus pond here, which is very beautiful. 】

[I saw her today, she seems to be doing well, I may be back tomorrow. 】

【Brother Zheng, how about our video at noon?I'd like to see you. 】

Chen Zheng should be having breakfast at this time, and he returned soon:

[Okay, send me the flight number before you come back, and I'll see if I can find time to pick you up. You have to eat well and take care of yourself. It's best not to bother Qingshan too much, and tell me as soon as possible. 】

The author says:

Brother Yu is also a storyteller. "Some things you want to do but don't do, you will be stuck in it for a lifetime." This sentence is said by Brother Yu.