living sacrifice

I don’t have much impression of Brother Liu, but this time I remembered him because he helped me copy two sets of courses.

His appearance is a bit special, the skin on his face is like that of a young man, but his hair is white like that of an old man.It's easy to mistake him for an elder here just by looking at his hair, but it doesn't seem like he is.

Brother Liu was busy copying study materials to our mobile phones. At this time, a strange woman walked towards me with a smile.

"Hello, Lin Xiao, you were brought by You Yan, right?"

"Yeah, hello." I nodded and looked at her for a long time and felt unfamiliar, but I didn't dare to speak nonsense, because I don't remember people's faces very well, and I often offend others by forgetting them.

Fortunately, the woman took the initiative to say: "I am Brother Liu's wife, and we met for the first time. I heard You Yan talking about you."

"Oh...are you a Christian too?"

"No, I haven't been baptized yet, and I'm a catechumen just like you."

"You haven't been baptized yet?" I was very happy because I felt like I finally found someone like me here.

"That's right. Brother Liu refused to let me be baptized. In fact, I have always wanted to be baptized. I am very envious of them."

I find it strange, don’t all Christians desperately hope that others will believe in Jesus and be baptized?I asked her, "Why didn't Brother Liu let you be baptized?"

"He's always saying my time isn't up yet."

Just at this time, Brother Liu came to me after finishing other people's work, and said, "Give me your mobile phone too, and I will install it for you too." Brother Liu's wife saw her husband coming, so she took advantage of the situation On him, the two seem to have a very close relationship.

I was envious in my heart, and at the same time, it also aroused my pain.

But brother Liu's wife didn't know this. She asked me, "How old are you now? Are you single?"

"I'm 30 and married."

"Does your husband believe in Jesus?"

"No." I gritted my teeth.

"It doesn't matter, I will believe when the time comes. I didn't believe in Jesus at first, but now I follow Brother Liu, and I am willing to come to understand the truth. Follow God well, and God will bless you."

"Thank you." Regarding my marriage, I really felt hopeless, but because of Brother Liu's wife's words, I had hope again.I think God has saved me who is stubborn and stubborn, why can't God save my husband?

But I was full of hatred for him in my heart, half of that unforgettable hatred came from his deception, and half from the humiliation he used me to make me suffer.

I regret it so much, it would be great if I didn't get married.I think about it now, before I hardened my heart to get the marriage certificate, there was really a voice in my heart that kept trying to stop me, he said not to marry this person, he said I would regret it, I ignored it He, I thought I imagined it myself, how could such a thing happen?

Then he stopped me again, once, twice, more than I can count, I was so sick of him, and then he stopped talking.

I really regret it!How did I know that there really is the Holy Spirit?Even now, I am tossing back and forth between belief and unbelief, and it was even more impossible then to believe that the Holy Spirit would speak to me.

In fact, just a few days ago, I secretly went to his personal social networking site to browse. What I expected to see was that he was not doing well now, and I expected to see how miserable he was living without me.

But what I saw was that he and that person publicly showed their affection on the Internet. He said: "After encountering these things, I realized that the person who is by my side is the person who loves me the most."

Those words stuck in my heart like a needle.I don't know which one is real, is it that he showed his true feelings on the night of the wedding; or was he thin when we saw him again after half a year apart; or was openly flirting with others on the Internet; It's a lie, he has been using his feelings to deceive everyone, including me, including that person... I only know that when I saw those words, I was so jealous that I cried bitterly all night.

I searched the "Bible" very seriously. On the one hand, I did it for my own life; Can't see him.

If there is a God, I know that God will reward each man according to his deeds, because he has rewarded me according to my deeds.My husband's behavior will definitely be severely punished by God, let alone the third person who is obscene behind the scenes and trying his best to do evil?

At that time, I really hated them, and I felt that I would never forgive them for the rest of my life.

I have already been severely hit by God. I heard You Yan say, "Whoever God loves, He will chasten more." At that time, I was very relieved, because I felt that I was loved by God.I hope that God will also discipline my husband twice, let him spit out the hurt he has done to me twice, let him receive retribution, know that God is true, and then come to me and ask me to forgive him.

I think it doesn't matter if neither of them repent in the end, as long as God is real, then hell is real too.Let these two go to hell together!I hate them!

No one will hate someone deeply for no reason. It is very hard to hate someone. Who would not want to live a good life?

You Yan said to Brother Liu, "Lin Xiao is a very innocent girl."

"Yes. I can tell." Brother Liu nodded.

But I am ashamed, because they don't know what I do in secret, they don't know my filth.If they knew, would they still regard me as a "simple girl"?

Brother Liu said to me, "Lin Xiao, sometimes the church is complicated, but you just have to follow the Lord with a simple heart, and He will guide you in everything."

"Ok."

"Pray when you encounter something, and don't just believe what people say. People are deceitful."

I think it's very strange, because Dong Yiyi also mentioned this kind of problem before, but Dong Yiyi, Chen Xueyan, Zhao Jie, Brother Liu, including a few other people who are not familiar with them, even Qian Junru, I am very concerned about them. I have a good impression, why do both Dong Yiyi and Brother Liu say this?

"Brother Liu, why do you say that?" I asked curiously.

Brother Liu thought for a long time, then shook his head and said, "There are many things I can't talk about, but you just follow God, God will let you see."

"okay."

"Thank the Lord." Brother Liu's wife was also smiling happily.

At that time, I loved my church very much, because my environment was not in the church.The church is my harbor and my reliance, and I love these brothers and sisters.But I had to leave my harbor to deal with the mess left by me and Wang Xuanhuan.

For the sake of marriage, I sent my parents away and let them go to other places for more than a year.Although it is fun to travel around, people are always homesick.

My mother told me on the phone: "Lin Xiao, come to our place with Wang Xuanhuan when you are free one day. If you don't come, there will be no chance. We are going back to S City."

Those who should come will always come, I know that they can't stay in other places for a lifetime.The problem is, I'm not ready at all.We didn’t buy a house when we got married. We planned to go out to rent a house, but because my parents voluntarily went out of town, I knew they were doing it for me, so I owed them their house in S City.

Wang Xuanhuan only came here twice, and then we had a quarrel, and he never set foot in this house again.

Wang Xuanhuan and I are now in a desperate situation. I know he won't even cooperate with me in acting, so I directly said on the phone: "Wang Xuanhuan probably doesn't have time, he has to go on a business trip."

My mother was very upset when she heard this: "On business trips, why does he always go on business trips? Didn't he think about coming to see us?"

I heard my dad say on the phone: "Why are you mentioning that? Lin Xiao can just come when he is free."

"I'll come." I said quickly, "I'm relatively free. I'll come this week. By the way, when are you going to return to S City? We also need to prepare, we need to rent a house."

"That's right, when you got married, you didn't even have a wedding house. To be honest, I think Wang Xuanhuan is too high on our family."

I don't want to mention it at all, it's all my fault.

My mother said: "You don't have to worry too much. You will inform us when you find a house. Try to find a better house with a lower price. You will all live in it in the future. Don't be careless."

"understood."

I know they love me, so I feel even more sorry.I really don't know which tendon I made a mistake at the beginning, maybe it was really influenced by evil spirits, and I would do such a bizarre thing.

What should I do now?

I prayed to God: "God, if you really exist, please help me, think of a way, what should I do next? I really have no idea. Please have mercy on me and give me a way out. "

During that time, I was really busy. On the one hand, I was busy looking for a cheap rental house, on the other hand, I was busy making money to increase my savings to meet the various challenges in the future, and on the other hand, I was busy mediating with Wang Xuanhuan.

I really hate him!

I still have to go to work during the day, and I am still writing novels at night, hoping that God will bless me and allow me to increase my income a little.And I also read the "Bible" very seriously. I hope to get some help from it, not only to convey the news of the end to my loved ones, but also hope to earn a little money for the manuscript.

That kind of service is actually not called serving God at all. Even I know that I have a lot of adulteration, but I have no choice but to complain to God: "I really have no one to turn to for help. The God who is and is forever , if you see my misery, please show mercy to me. I hope that I can leave this environment in the future, and I can only concentrate on serving you, and I can take writing as my career, so that I will not be disturbed by society. I hope you Bless me with this novel and let me become famous in one fell swoop. I am not for the benefit of my own fame. I think that if I can write full-time, it can solve many of my conflicts. Maybe I can earn a house by writing books, That way you don’t have to worry about the wedding room or anything else.”

Thinking about it now, this kind of prayer can really be said to be shameless, but that's how I prayed and thought at the beginning.

Did God really not promise?Now that I think about it, perhaps the Lord has granted some requests that He thinks are reasonable.

For example, he helped me find a place to rent.

For example, my novel was signed at the starting point. Although I didn't become famous and didn't make much money, this event itself was an encouragement.I know it is easy to sign a contract in the Jinjiang Lily Zone, but it is very difficult to get ahead by writing serious novels on the Qidian website.When the 100 million-word deed of sale was sent to my home, I was overjoyed and sold myself for 50 years with a stroke of a pen.

I really didn't know what to do, my life was such a mess at the time, just taking one step at a time.

But in such an environment where hope was cut off, God led me step by step until I left Egypt like the Israelites, walked in the wilderness, and reached the land of Canaan in the future.

These things are really wonderful. If it wasn't because they happened to me, if they were told to me by other people, I'm afraid I wouldn't be able to believe it, right?