over dependent

Jiang Yi didn't know what was going on, but he had a hunch.As long as he thinks of the two scars on Jin Rong's hands, the ominous premonition becomes more and more serious.

He is not a fool, these two scars can never be tattoos, they can only be cut wrists.

Song Nianyuan didn't say much, and sent some photos to Jiang Yi.Three hospital reports, a critical illness notice, two medical certificates, and medicines, many, many medicines.

Jiang Yi was stunned. He read the critical illness notice, which was the day Jin Rong broke up with him for the second time in September five years ago.Jiang Yi would never forget that day even if he died. He spent the morning in a daze, and finally waited for Jin Rong's call. There was nothing to hold back, only endless self-blame and guilt.

"I'm not good enough for you..."

"Sorry……"

Jiang Yi zoomed in on the hospital report and took a suffocated breath. In an instant, he clearly and deeply felt what it was like to be stabbed like a knife.

Depression, taking medicine, cutting wrists, looking at these lists, Jiang Yi couldn't help but imagine what Jin Rong would be like at that time.

He thought of Jin Rong being pushed into the ambulance and having his stomach washed in the emergency room; whether he was dying when the critical illness notice was issued, he was so close to the gate of hell, so close that he could step in with one foot, and almost couldn't come back.

"I'm not good enough for you..."

Jiang Yi found it difficult to breathe, he panted hard, and his blank thoughts lost control several times.

"I envy you for having a good mother."

"I'm a sucker."

"Will you always be with me?"

Jiang Yi ran towards the night, running and running against the moon.

"I'm bad."

"I'm sorry."

Did he have a depression attack when he said these words?So he regards himself as dust, as the most useless person in the world, he feels that he is a burden, and he is afraid that he will drag Jiang Yi down.

So he said to break up, and after the breakup, he went to seek death, but Jiang Yi naively thought that he was drunk.

Jiang Yi felt that he didn't care about him enough.After reuniting for so long, he never asked carefully, and skipped after hearing a few words from him.It was his fault.

He ran downstairs to Jin Rong's house, his hands shaking as he pressed the elevator.

Jin Rong didn't expect Jiang Yi to turn back, and thought he had left something behind.As soon as he opened the door, he laughed: "What? Or did you decide not to leave?"

Jiang Yi was tired from running and was still panting. He originally thought to ask him "did he suffer from depression" immediately, but seeing his face, he didn't know why he didn't dare to bring it up again.

"I left something behind." Jiang Yi stood up straight, "I forgot to take something when you were here."

Jin Rong touched his pocket: "No? Did you put your things here?"

"Come here." Jiang Yi beckoned him.

Jiang Yi pulled him to the dark stairway, covered by the heavy door, the outside light could not come in, only a small light was cut.Jiang Yi stayed away from the light, and dragged Jin Rong further in, to the darkest place.

The weak green light of the safety exit illuminated Jin Rong's shoes.

"What?" Jin Rong asked.

"Don't you know what it is?" Jiang Yi pretended to take something out of his pants pocket and put it in the palm of his hand, "Guess what?"

"You are so boring." Jin Rong ignored his boring tricks, "What can you have? You don't have anything in your pocket. If you want to stay, just say so, and if you don't want to stay, go back to school. It's so late, when the time comes Cars are..."

Jiang Yi opened his hand, and Jin Rong couldn't help but glanced at it. Sure enough, there was nothing, and he was still fooled: "You still lied to me."

"Rongrong." Jiang Yi shouted suddenly, holding Jin Rong's face, he got closer and closer until the tip of his nose touched.Jin Rong's breath suddenly became a little quicker, and he raised his lips to kiss him, but Jiang Yi avoided him.

Jin Rong blamed: "You can kiss if you want, what do you mean by avoiding? What happened to me?"

"My heart." Jiang Yi said disgustingly, "I put my heart in your stomach, what do you think I left behind?"

"Slick tongue, you are so stupid." Goosebumps all over Jin Rong's body, but he still hooked Jiang Yi's neck with his arms, "If you put your heart in my stomach, then make up with me, and we will be together forever, okay? "

Jiang Yi didn't agree or object, but just lowered his head and bit his lower lip.Jin Rong's lips are soft, and he also has some kind of conditioned reflex. If he bites, he wants to kiss back. He pinches Jiang Yi's head and doesn't allow him to go. He said softly, "I'll let you go home. You don't want it. What do you mean now?"

"I love you." Jiang Yi hugged him, "I really love you."

Jin Rong was flattered: "Why all of a sudden..."

"Why didn't you tell me?" Jiang Yi asked, "The second time you called me back then, you didn't throw up drunk at all. Why didn't you tell me?"

"What did you say?" Jin Rong's heart trembled, "I... I'm just drunk..."

"Didn't we agree? Don't hide from each other anymore. I don't want to hide from you either. I just love you and have always loved you." Jiang Yi continued to hold his face, trying to meet his eyes.They only see the darkness, and the blurred faces in the darkness. Even if they don't look carefully, they can still know the intriguing eyes.

Jiang Yi is urgent, but Jin Rong avoids.

"I love you too." Jin Rong turned his face away, "I have always loved you too."

"I know there are some things you don't want to tell me. I don't need to know about your family, or I can pretend not to know. Can you keep this from me? Anything is fine, but this is the only thing I want Listen to you personally."

Jin Rong still tried his best to avoid his gaze, but Jiang Yi didn't allow him to do so.I had no choice but to look directly into Jiang Yi's eyes. In the dark, I couldn't see the expression reflected in the pupils clearly. Jin Rong smiled helplessly: "I'm not crazy."

He said with difficulty: "I'm not crazy, Mr. Jiang, I won't be your drag..."

Jin Rong felt empty in his heart, and he tried to calmly say: "For some reason, I have something wrong. I'm afraid you think I'm crazy, I'm afraid you..." He sobbed.

The stairs were extremely quiet, there was no sound, only Jin Rong's soft sobs sounded like a drumstick; and Jiang Yi was the drum, the drumstick hit the surface of the drum with a loud "boom", almost to the point of dying. Jiang Yi was shocked.

He hugged Jin Rong tightly: "You are not a lunatic, how could I think you are a lunatic?"

"She said I was crazy... She said I would kill you... That's what she told me at the beginning. I don't think I can destroy you, I can't destroy your family... Teacher Jiang, I don't know what to do what to do……"

Jiang Yi heard him cry, as if a knife had been pierced into his body, it hurt so badly that he forgot to breathe, and couldn't breathe.He couldn't imagine what kind of mood Jin Rong had when he called him for the last time.After the phone call, Jin Rong was determined to die.

Death is the most terrible thing, nothing can undo death.And he almost never saw Jin Rong again.

"You won't destroy me. I love you very much. I need you. Only when you are by my side can I live a good life." Jiang Yi stroked his back, and he was like tears in his arms. Man, out of breath.

"I don't know... At that time, I didn't want to leave you, but I really wanted to die at that time. I didn't know that I was sick, so I just thought whether death was liberation. Teacher Jiang, I'm sorry..."

"I don't want you to say I'm sorry, you are not wrong." Jiang Yi kept saying to him, "You are not wrong, you are right to be with me, you are right to like me, there is nothing wrong with what you do."

Jin Rong shook his head vigorously: "I don't know...I'm really sorry! When I called you, I just wanted to hear your voice, I just wanted...I want to see you for the last time, even if I die, I really want to give you a dream..."

"Stupid, why are you so stupid?" Jiang Yi had no choice but to blame him, "I don't want you to be alone, I want to share your unhappiness. I don't want you to die, let alone dreaming of you! I don't want you to apologize, Jin Rong , why have you been refusing to tell me?"

He looked at Jin Rong's face again, gently rubbing the corners of his eyes and his wrinkled brows with his thumb.

"I don't want to tell you, I'm afraid you will blame me, I'm afraid you'll dislike me, I'm afraid you don't want me. I think I can keep it from day to day. Did Teacher Song tell you? Did he talk nonsense?" Jin Rong was so anxious , stomping anxiously, "Can't you act like you don't even know? Jiang Yi, I don't want you to leave me..."

"I won't leave you." Jiang Yi kissed his wet eyes, "I won't blame you, I won't dislike you, I don't want you to hide it from me. I want you to believe me."

"I believe in you, Jiang Yi, I believe in you very much."

In the past, Jiang Yi didn't have the feeling of "recovering what was lost", but now that Jin Rong is in his arms, and he finally talked about the past, he has the feeling of "coming back".

He hugged Jin Rong in the corridor for a long time, and heard Jin Rong cry for a long time. He was exhausted from crying, so he sat on the steps with Jiang Yi.

"I love you very much..." Jin Rong's voice was also hoarse, "I miss you very much."

"Let's get back together, okay?" Jiang Yi touched the broken hair on his forehead, stroked it up, stroked his forehead again, and kissed him, "I will take good care of you and never make you sad again."

"Let's make up." Jiang Yi pulled his wrist, his tone soft to the bone, "I still want to be your boyfriend. It's okay if you don't agree, anyway, I like you, if you don't agree, I will work harder .”

Jiang Yi still remembers the same way when he confessed to him before: If you disagree, I will try harder.

What did Jin Rong say at that time?He said: You don't have to try harder.

Jiang Yi still remembers it, as if he remembers everything they said between them.Jin Rong also remembered that he snuggled into Jiang Yi's arms and said with a twitch: "You don't have to work hard anymore, I want to be with you."

They don't have to try any more.

"I love you, I really love you very much." Jiang Yi said to him.

When Jiang Yi performed in high school, he accompanied a song called "No Change".There is a lyric in it that he likes the most: To love, you must always be loved, so that you don't seem to be sad.

He sat on the stairs and sang this song to Jin Rong, tenderly.He sang "It Takes My Generosity To Spoil Me."In the past, Jin Rong missed the performance, which was something he regretted in high school.Now that I have heard it with my own ears, it seems that I will no longer regret it.

"I have to understand more before giving me the future."

"Anything can be exchanged, but it's a pity that I am so happy that I can't exchange anything."

Jin Rong leaned on his shoulder: "Anything can be exchanged, but my Jiang Yi can't exchange anything."

-end-

The author says:

It's finally over!Thank you very much for your support all the time, really thank you woo woo woo

This article has many deficiencies and shortcomings, and I have summarized a lot after writing it.Thank you very much for your tolerance and support, and I am also very grateful to everyone who sees here!Thank you very very very much!

I am also very reluctant to end it, but there is no good inspiration for the extra episode, so I haven't written it all the time, sorry!If you want to see anything, you can leave a comment ~ Thank you for your likes, it is a great honor ~

I wish you all a happy life, successful studies, smooth career, healthy and happy every day~ If you are lucky enough, see you in the next book~ I love you all.