over dependent

"Long time no see, Mom." Jin Rong said.

"Why are you here?" Jin Shiyuan rubbed his sleeves unnaturally, "You didn't say anything when you came, look at me..."

"I have something to ask you for." Jin Rong said lightly.

"what's up?"

Jin Rong suddenly laughed: "Chat with you."

Jin Shiyuan was in a hurry suddenly: "Okay, let's chat. Shall I pour you some water?"

"I'll just say it here." Jin Rong took out a large bag of honey cakes from his bag and put it on the piano, pretending to be relaxed, "I remember you used to like to eat it, and I happened to pass by the gate of No. [-] Middle School, so I bought it." a little bit."

From the corner of his eyes, Jin Rong saw the little girl staring at the bag of cakes, biting her nails and trying to say something.He couldn't laugh, but he didn't have a straight face: "Want to eat?"

"think."

Jin Shiyuan patted the child on the shoulder and said unhappily, "Go back to your room."

Jin Rong held the cake in his hand and did not step forward, waiting for her to come and get it by herself.But she still hesitated and turned to look at Jin Shiyuan.Jin Shiyuan had no choice but to say, "Take it away."

After the children walked out of the room and closed the door, Jin Rong finally got to the point: "I'm here to change my household registration."

"Relocate?" Jin Shiyuan was taken aback, "What account?"

Jin Rong shrugged: "Of course I moved to my own household registration. I haven't been home for so long, and it's not a solution to stay in your household registration all the time. What do you think?"

"Are you coming back just to change your household registration? You... don't you have anything to say to me? Xiaorong, we haven't seen each other for so many years, do you have anything to say to your mother?"

"Yes." Jin Rong thought for a while, and said word by word, "I hate you so much."

Jin Shiyuan's heart skipped a beat.

Jin Rong repeated again: "I really hate you."

"When I first went to Beijing, it was very painful." Jin Rong muttered to himself, "I asked Mr. Song a lot of questions, but not many. I only asked a few questions every day. I asked him, did you My mother doesn't like me because I'm sick; is it because I'm disobedient that she doesn't love me? After a while, I asked him again, is it because I don't let her be with Fang Yizhe , she hates me. If I don't take the medicine, I can't sleep at night, I just think over and over, why do you treat me like this, have you ever loved me. "

Jin Shiyuan burst into tears, but she didn't defend herself.

"I always wondered what kind of love is like, what kind of love is called love. Later I figured out that there are many kinds of love, care is called love, care is also called love, torture is also called love, and what is beyond recognition is also called love. It is love. There are so many kinds of love, not only caring is considered love. Your strictness to me and exercise to me are also considered love. I comfort myself like this, I think you love me, and you really regard me as your most proud Even if I think so, I can’t convince myself.” Jin Rong turned his head, without ups and downs, and without tears, just asking seriously, “Do you love me? I’m in your heart, is it yours? pride?"

"I have always loved you, and you are my pride." Jin Shiyuan cried and said, "For the past five years, I have been thinking whether I have been too harsh on you, whether I have been too cruel to you. I desperately want You become a talent, I want you to be a very good person. I have no ability, I am afraid that you will suffer with me, but I want you to learn piano. Xiao Rong, I never thought that you would be forced to be like that by me. "

Jin Rong looked at the keys again. He wiped the piano with his fingertips for a while, and asked, "When I was a child, I asked you, where is your father? Everyone else has a father, and I want to have one too. You said I didn't have a father. Later, you stopped caring about me." No, and you don’t answer my questions. I keep asking, but you are always impatient. I really want someone who can be patient with me, and I really want someone who can praise me, say that I am great, that I am very powerful. I want someone to accompany me every day and say he loves me every day. I want to have a father. If my father is there, will he praise me every day and accompany me every day. You ask me why I like men Yes, why do I like Jiang Yi. Because he will praise me, he will accompany me, he hugged me when I was sick, he said that I have to learn to be sloppy and self-willed. With him, I can lose my temper or Willful, you can have whatever you want. He will buy me candy, he will buy me delicious food, and he will give me the good ones first."

"Xiao Rong..."

"When I was with Jiang Yigang, I felt like he was my father. I even thought that if I were his child, I could sit on the back of his bicycle. After school, he would ask me What happened, he will ask me if I am happy studying. He will accompany me when I practice the piano, and he will coax me when I don’t want to practice. Without him, I would have wanted to die very early. I need him to be with me, I need him to comfort me, I need him to cuddle me, I can't sleep at night, just call him and he will come. I need him so much He, it’s not that he needs me, it’s that I can’t leave him. During the few years I went to Beijing, I thought, one day I still have to find him, because I can’t live without him. You told me to break up with him, you don’t want me to like him Man, you think I should be someone else's reliance. But I'm already like this, I'm already so bad, how can I be someone's reliance?"

Jin Shiyuan cried and shook his head: "Maybe you just want a father."

"What I want is not only my father, but also my mother, and all the family affection. I seem to have it, but in fact I have nothing. When I was sick, I always had a dream, dreaming that I was trapped in a love In this cage, this cage is made of gold, very bright and brilliant. There is only me and my mother in this cage. My mother can go out, but I can’t, I can only be inside. Later Jiang Yi appeared, and he brought I went out, but I was found out, so I was caught by my mother. She didn't allow me to go out with others, she wanted me to be obedient. But I don't want to be a person in a cage, I am myself, I am not a copy of Song Nianyuan. I don't like it Playing the piano, I don't like art, but I can only be forced to learn, I don't want to do this, I really hate it."

But now it’s better, the thing that Jin Rong hated most before is still with him all his life, because he can’t do anything except playing the piano.

It's the number one irony in the world.

In fact, today he wanted to wait for a "sorry" from Jin Shiyuan, but when it comes to now, it doesn't seem to be that important anymore.

Jin Rong saw Jin Shiyuan's child just now, it was his half sister.He looks very similar to Jin Shiyuan, with big eyes, blinking innocently, like a deer.

She can hide behind Jin Shiyuan.Jin Shiyuan will protect her, but Jin Shiyuan has never protected Jin Rong.

"To you, I'm a failed handicraft. It's just an object. It doesn't look good. If you don't like it, you can throw it away at will and make a new one." He said.

"No, you have never been a handicraft or an object. I'm sorry, Xiao Rong, I have been ignoring your feelings all these years. I forced you. I don't know if there is any way to make up for it now... "

"No, there is nothing to make up for. If you want me to play the piano, I can do it; if you want me to be quiet and talk a lot with you, I can do it too. You told me not to be with Jiang Yi, I really can't do it. I still want to be with him, even if you don't agree now, I shouldn't." Jin Rong lowered his head, took out a bank card in his pocket, and put it on the piano, "I have nothing I can give it to you. There is a little money in this card, which is the tuition I owed to learn piano before. I will return it to you. Actually, I can’t figure out how much I owe. The prize money from going out to competitions when I was an undergraduate, and my salary from performing, are all in it anyway. Happy newlyweds, mom, the password is your birthday."

"I don't want your money." Jin Shiyuan cried, "I don't want you to pay me back, Jin Rong, take it away!"

"There's no need to waste this piano. It's even inaccurate. Later, I'll find a tuner to tune the piano. When the piano is ready, you can learn from her. Just treat it as cultivating sentiment."

He was about to get up and leave, but Jin Shiyuan suddenly stopped him: "Are you really that cruel? Are you going to sever the mother-child relationship with me? Jin Rong, I raised you so much...why you never see me Is it good? In your eyes, I am the only one who treats you badly, and you only think about my badness!"

Jin Rong frowned in disgust: "Yes, I am such a cruel person, who did I inherit it from? Is it from you or Song Nianyuan?"

"You're leaving, you're cutting a piece of my body! You don't have to go home, you can live outside! Whether you're with that man or not, I don't care, don't you Is it okay to be so heartless?"

"Not good, not good not good." Jin Rong pulled her hand away, "My greatest pain comes from you and Fang Yizhe, you clearly know that I am in so much pain, you clearly know that I hate him so much, and you have to risk your life Stay with him and marry him! Do you think this relationship is vigorous? Do you think it's worth it? "

Jin Shiyuan broke down and cried, "I'm not..."

"I've said countless times that I hate Fang Yizhe! What about you, even if I'm dying and lying in the hospital, you still have to stand with him! You know I hate him so much, and I want to marry him, and I'll marry him. Acquiescence to him to find me, continue to disgust me! Do you think that I am easy to talk and easily manipulated? Do you think that after five years, I can forget everything? I am disgusted by Fang Yizhe, disgusted by his son, and Disgusting you."

"I am your mother……"

"So I have no choice. Mom, how much effort you put into cultivating me, I will pay you back in the future. I will send you money every month, and I will give you all the money I owe you! Is this okay?"

"No... no!"

"Happy newlyweds, mom, congratulations on finally marrying him. It's not easy to endure for more than ten years, and it's not easy for me to accompany you for so many years."

Jin Rong was about to leave, and he was going out with his bag, but Jin Shiyuan cried and stopped him.

Once I made it clear and understood, I really let go of everything in my heart.There can no longer be reconciliation between him and Jin Shiyuan, and there will never be a reconciliation.

"Aren't we mother and son? Xiao Rong, did you really leave me like this? I'm sorry, I'm really sorry! I didn't mean to hurt you like this. The piano you played for me is very nice. I can't believe what you said. Accept them all, I accept them all! I'm sorry, mom didn't mean to force you, it's my fault! It's my fault..."

Jin Rong shook his head: "I'm leaving, I shouldn't be able to come on your wedding day."

"Don't go, mom really knows I'm wrong, can you stay? Beijing is so far away, I miss you, where can I find you? Jin Rong, Jin Rong!"

Jin Shiyuan chased him out, crying all the time.Just like when Jin Rong was a child, Jin Shiyuan wanted to travel far away and temporarily put him at a friend's house, but he also chased after him, crying all the time.

"Mom, don't go!" Jin Rong cried until his eyes were swollen, but Jin Shiyuan didn't look back.

What was she doing then?She herself forgot.All she could think of was Jin Rong's desperate cries, tearing and begging.

Just like she is now.

In fact, she loves Jin Rong very much, very much.But her love has changed beyond recognition.

The author says:

Ask everyone~ The last chapter is about [-] words, do you want to finish it in one day or in two days~