Goodbye Wing On

I also went to work well in the morning.All kinds of report data, I don't feel bored anymore, wait, go home well, sit on the sofa and watch TV, stay with them, and don't go out to drink.

I feel that the emotions of so many years in my heart have settled down, and there is real joy.

At noon, a little after one o'clock, he called in my sleep, and I said drowsily, "Brother." I finally called him that naturally, maybe because my consciousness was not so clear.

He was a little surprised, and responded unnaturally, "Oh. Are you not at work?"

"It's only two o'clock, and it's lunch break."

"Seeing that you are weak, then you continue to sleep."

"No, I'm awake anyway, let's talk for a while."

"In a while, someone will go to the airport by car. Let me tell you something. There will be colleagues coming to talk about things later, about work."

I laughed, "Are you talking about business?"

He explained, "It's really about work." He never explained it before.Getting older is not the same after all.

I smile.

"Then I won't say much, you can sleep for a while, goodbye." The word "ah" changed the voice in a low voice, I don't know that he can say it so ecstatically.

"BYEBYE."

At about ten o'clock in the evening, he texted: "Anda."

Me: "Well, well."

About 01:30 p.m.: "Home, sweet dreams."

Only then did I remember that lighters are not allowed on the plane, and they cannot pass through the security check.I don't believe he couriered those twelve lighters home.

In the end, those twelve lighters were just discarded in the garbage bins in Guangzhou.

In the middle of the night, in the dark, I just stared blankly, thinking about the fate of the lighter.

Later I found out that I didn't even have his address and landline for the person who had talked to me about elopement, so it seemed that I had no choice but to go to the moon.

I texted: "Give me an address and phone number where I can find you at any time."

one day,

two days,

...no reply for many days.

Sure enough, I can only fly to the moon.

Fortunately, I have long been used to not waiting.

Moreover, to turn him into an alternative existence, I don't miss, wait, look back, or hope for an existence.

The day lily is already cold, sadly, I still hope to return to the pot and cook again.

It is a sad life to have expectations.

I shouldn't have had expectations under his teasing.

Yesterday was very sad, I was hanging out with the school belle and others in KTV until after 12 o'clock, relying on the drunkenness, I still relived the old dream with Cuihua, at that moment, I thought of the peach blossom eye.

Not too much, she and I both need physical comfort.

They all thought that I would have any plans for the school flower or some other flower, and who knew that in the past ten years, my attention was all on Xie Yongan, no matter when he was there or when he disappeared...

When watching movies, watching TV, fooling around, remembering, etc...

I thought I had, the dust settled.

But as soon as it settled down, the wind swept away again.

He is always a master of overturning clouds and rain, or it is because I care more about him, so, forever and always repeating the situation of being ignored by others and being occasionally glanced at...

no reply.

I can't make a phone call.

I can't text.

The first thing I do when I get up early every day is this kind of psychological construction.

As soon as there is movement on the mobile phone, check it immediately, like a frightened bird.

Every text message is an advertisement, what website has a big sale, what study abroad guidance, what insurance...

Take the phone into the bedroom and put it next to the bed to sleep...

Going crazy again.

Just going crazy again.

This state is really bad.

No news this morning.

Not at noon.

I took the phone to the bedroom and listened to two calls while sleeping, but none of them were true.

Worked in the afternoon and couldn't settle down.

Can't help but send a text message: Brother...

He came back, this time very quickly: Brother is sick.

SMS: Have you seen a doctor? Is there anyone with you?

After a while, he called: "Chen."

"What's the matter? Are you okay?"

"Drink too much."

"Why did you drink so much alcohol? Did you see a doctor or get an injection?"

"I have something on my mind. I drank too much. I'm getting an injection in the hospital. My nephew is with me. I'll call you later."

It's going to be a maddening situation.

I can't get into this state again.I've hit hard enough.

Later he called: "The doctor said that if you continue to drink alcohol, your life will be in danger; secondly, sex and abstinence. I have become a walking dead."

I finally worked up the courage: "How can I see you?"

He smiled: "Walking is definitely not an option. Cycling can be considered."

He avoided me very skillfully.

Four or two thousand pounds.

I was stymied and couldn't ask any more.

He asked, "Why don't you have sex with me?"

I laughed: "I guess I won't be able to bear the beauty now, you are old, I am not interested."

In fact, what I said was, "I don't have the guts, I'm afraid you won't recognize anyone if you pull up your pants."

In fact, there is no need to take off his trousers. No matter what he is wearing, he will immediately turn around and deny the level of people. He has always performed so well.

After the typhoon, the rain and the wind stopped, and there was a rare coolness.

After seven o'clock in the evening, I went out for a walk.It's raining, the air is extraordinarily fresh and cool, and it's wonderful to hear the sound of the rain hitting the umbrella.

There are almost no pedestrians on the tree-lined path, and a person is wading in the water with an umbrella and flip-flops, letting the water flow between his toes.

I need to breathe and think freely without interruption.

I need to think calmly.

I thought a lot.

Falling back into this state is of course looking for death. I also know that it should not be, but I am out of control. When I encounter this ten thousand-year snake spirit, I have never had the initiative. Pressing the continue or stop button is at his place. I have always been Passive, like a paper kite, the rope is pulled in his hand, if it is far away, it will be far away, if it is close, it will be near. One day he will get tired of it, he will let go, and let me fall/fall.

Nothing, staying away from him is always the only correct way.

Continuing to make it clear which way I want to go, I'm heading in his direction, and I've slipped too far.

Let it go.

Drink some wine.

Last night, after drinking, he and Cuihua comforted each other, and they really slept well.

After going through too many things, I traveled around Southeast Asia, saw men, women, and now transvestites, and my horizons became wider; after my grandma passed away, I went back to my hometown for the funeral, and the person who loved me lay stiff and cold In the refrigerator; when I return to Shenzhen, I feel that the world is different, and mundane things will make everything fade away and shift.

It turned out that the mood of ups and downs has calmed down, maybe this is God's arrangement, which made my heart ripple, and my heart was turbulent, and then my heart was like still water.

Thank him for not replying to the text message with my address, thank him for making me completely cold.

Like grandma lying in the refrigerator.

in the end.

But so.

It can be seen that fighting also requires everyone to stand on the ring to face each other. It is useless for one person to stand on the stage no matter how hard he swings.

I've punched the void long enough, too hard, and it's gone.

I still obediently, find a step down automatically, eat and sleep, even if I can't sleep, take two tablets of diazepam.

To put it bluntly, how bland.

I'm an emotional person, and sometimes I feel like a frenzy, and most of the time, like now, it's flat and boring.

The sun still rises.

In fact, nothing can change this relationship between each other, he is still like that, and I am still like this.

I love him as much as he doesn't love me.

Mine still has to change.

The world keeps moving forward, how can I stand still.

The burnt old house has long been unable to rekindle the spark, and I had fantasies, and it is not too late to be disillusioned now.

Goodbye to the past, goodbye to memories.

Goodbye Wing On.