You can eat it but you are not allowed to miss it

A special room must be arranged for her old man.Brother is good or bad, what do you think? "

"My mother is coming, is it counting as a new addition to the family? I thought you were planning to give birth to a fat boy for me?" He joked, he had already put down the box in his hand, wrapped it around my waist, and touched me intimately nose.

His gentleness is always very useful to me, "The house is ready, and it is indeed time to put the baby on the agenda. If it is not too late, let's do it now!"

"I'm sick, I can't give birth! I'm not serious!" He slapped my butt, it hurt so much, he put his hips on his hips and gave the order like the "hostess" at home, "I must finish moving things today!"

After a hard day's work, the two of us were almost paralyzed.He was resting on my arm, his eyes could barely open, "Go to sleep." I hugged him into my arms, "In the future, you don't have to worry about bad guys harassing you, and you don't have to travel across the city for dating."

He closed his eyes and murmured intermittently in my ear: "Heqian, I'm really sorry to let you bear such a huge amount of mortgage expenses alone, and you don't want me to pay you rent. From now on, I will bear all our household expenses. Well, although it is definitely a drop in the bucket compared to the mortgage, this is what I should do..."

"Fool," I said, not sure if he listened.What a fool, you are all mine now, do you think I still care about you "living" in my house?This is your home too, and you are the one I take care of.

The fool soon fell asleep.But I was thinking about the "Danish Girl", tossing and turning, so I got up quietly.The story of the movie happened in Copenhagen in 1926. The female painter Gerda asked her husband to wear stockings as a temporary model because of the absence of female models.At first, the husband was not willing to put on a full set of women's clothing, but gradually, the hidden female consciousness in him was awakened, and he began to try to imitate the posture of women, and was immersed in creating a female character named Lili.Paper can't hold fire, after Lili was accosted by a man at a party, he couldn't help kissing that man, and happened to be caught by his wife.The wife "ordered" her husband to stop wearing women's clothes and play Lili.Although the husband verbally agreed, he still couldn't resist his instinct.Behind the scenes, he still dressed himself up as a woman, and went to find the man who showed his favor to him.At the time of deep love, Lili found out that the man did not pursue her as a girl, but a gay man, who kissed Lili because of her male body. Unable to accept the truth, Lili chose to push the man away and run away. .

Lili realized that she was not gay like this, but that the girl's soul had existed in her body since she was a child.Unlike his wife's bold initiative, he, the husband, is shy and passive. Even the relationship between men and women is initiated by his wife.On a stormy night, the broken wife faced Lili and begged her, "Ineedtotalktomyhusband.Ineedtoholdmyhusband.Canyouatleasttry." Lili said to his wife with tears: "I'm sorry."

The story has a tragic ending. Although Lili bravely accepted the operation and had a short period of happy life as a girl, she eventually died after the female genital replacement operation, and her wife was always by her side. Gave Lili tolerance and strength.

After watching the movie, my brain was not able to think much due to exhaustion, so I lay down on the sofa and fell asleep.

I had a dream.In the dream, he was Lili and I was Gerda.

He stood in front of a floor-to-ceiling mirror with his back to me, wearing a classic little black dress, red-soled shoes, and seductive red lips. He looked at me proudly through the mirror, like a queen.

"Brother." I called him.

He gave a strange smile.

"Ah Qian, do you think I'm pretty?"

"pretty."

"They say I'm pretty like a girl."

"Ayu..."

"I'm going to be a girl. Then, your brother will disappear."

"Can you keep him from disappearing? We fell in love with great difficulty."

"I'm sorry, I can't. Nan Heqian, does he really love you that much? Maybe it's just you. Only you can change him from a man to a woman. No matter if it's Xia Ting, Momo or Luo Xuan. not."

Indeed, if a person's orientation is a spectrum, then he must be on the heterosexual side (if he is male as a premise).Even if he is dating a man, he chooses a boy who is more feminine.If he wants to turn himself into a real girl, he must need a "tool" to help him explore other possibilities for himself.He "coincidentally" met me at this time.He succeeded, not only made a man fall in love with him like a woman, but also wanted to protect him, and wanted to build a nest for him.

"I believe he loves me." I said, I firmly believe he loves me.

"Maybe he loves you, but it can't be you."

"Why?" I wondered, "I can be a husband."

He still kept smiling, "Nan Heqian, you know he's not gay. You love a man, and he needs a man who loves women."

I couldn't deny his doubts, just like I couldn't let go easily.I can do everything possible to keep him, let him maintain the status quo for me, continue to be my brother, be my boy, just ask him not to hurt himself.However, I clearly understand that I am too selfish.

"Please don't hurt him. If possible, I would rather let me bear everything."

"I didn't hurt him, I just wanted to cut off what didn't belong to him." His smile in the mirror became more and more weird.

I just saw that he was holding a sharp weapon with a cold light in his hand. I wanted to run forward to stop it, but my body couldn't move, "Don't! Please, don't!"

Without the slightest hesitation, he raised the sharp knife and stabbed at his body. The splashed blood sprayed on the mirror, and the mottled blood flowed down the smooth mirror. There was a strange pattern on it, like The bright red rose seemed to be the shape of the tattoo on his leg.

That delicate and charming rose-like boy exhausted the nutrients of life and bloomed so vividly, it seemed to decorate my dreams for a short time, but it is a pity that the flowering period is coming to an end, and he will leave eventually.

"Aqian, why are you lying here?"

In a trance, I felt that someone was shaking my body. When I woke up, I found that I fell off the sofa and lay on the ground without knowing when. The movie screen was flickering with dim light, and I had already pressed the pause button.And A Yu was wearing a pajamas, sitting next to me, looking at me with concern, "I woke up in the middle of my sleep and found that you were not in bed, so I had to come out to look for you. Why do you want to wake up in the middle of the night to watch a movie?" He watched Watch the DVD box of The Danish Girl open on the desktop.

"Maybe because I was too excited about moving, although I was tired, I couldn't fall asleep. I just found a movie and watched it, and I fell asleep after watching it for a long time." I supported my body from the hard floor and touched my forehead. , covered with sweat, secretly praying that I didn't say anything strange in the dream just now.

"You seemed to be having a nightmare just now. I've been lying here watching you for a long time." He even smiled.

"I'm sleeping on the floor and you're just looking at me like that?"

"A-Qian!" He hugged me, his body was so warm and soft, "Don't be angry, just watch, I can't help but look at it for too long."

"It's okay, let's go to bed and sleep?"

"What about the movie, do you want to record the playing time for you and watch it next time?" He asked me.

"No, just take whatever you want, and fell asleep without seeing much."

It seems that the countdown has been pressed, which makes me uneasy. At the end of time, will I lose him forever?

21. Tentative

◎"In front of you who I love the most, I allow myself to show weakness."◎

I received a message from A Yu before I got off work. The furniture I ordered was delivered. I rushed home and waited to "receive the reward" in front of him, but what I got was a look of contempt, "Baby, what do you think?"

He took me to the second bedroom, opened the door, and there was a whole set of brand-new light pink furniture carefully selected by me, matched with gray decoration, which I thought was simple and sweet.Although, he definitely wanted to live in the master bedroom with me, but Ayu's mother didn't know that we were a couple. In order to deceive others, the only room with pink furniture in name was his bedroom.

"It's just that I didn't have time last weekend. Let you choose a suitable color yourself. Why do you think I like pink?" he asked.

I was sloppy: "Ah, isn't it cute? It's pink and tender, I think it fits well!"

He still looked contemptuous: "Cute is cute, but the other rooms are all log-colored. Suddenly there is a room with a different style, doesn't it feel awkward?"

"If you don't like it, just ask them to change it. I thought you might like a livelier color."

His expression changed from contempt to a meaningful smile, "You seem to have been behaving abnormally recently, sending me some strange things every three days, such as cosmetics, small skirts. Be honest, what is your plan?" He Taking advantage of my unpreparedness, I began to tickle my waist, and I kept yelling "Help!" You know, I was most afraid of this, so I quickly hid in the house. make one