Don't fall in love with the professor

Along the way, Jiang Xiaocheng remained silent. When he got home, he only said that his legs and feet were sore from walking, and he lay down early after washing.

Holding hot milk, Zhong Kexing stood at the door of the bedroom with his hands hanging empty. After hesitating for a while, he knocked lightly on the door.

"Small town?"

"Am I in?"

The room was dark, and the lights were not turned on. When he pushed the door like this, a ray of light came in. The white gauze that covered the window sensed the wind and shook lightly.

With his back facing the direction of the door, Jiang Xiaocheng covered himself in the quilt, his lying figure undulating like mountains.

Zhong Ke walked over, half knelt beside the bed, and asked, "Hot milk, do you want some?"

The voice was soft to the bone, and Jiang Xiaocheng felt sour when he heard it. He didn't want Zhong Kexing to see his appearance, so he just said, "I—"

The word "I" was squeezed out of his throat, and it sounded hoarse. He stopped quickly, took a breath, and said in a calm tone as much as possible: "I don't want to drink, I'm going to sleep."

He turned over and buried his head deeper.

Zhong Ke put the cup aside, sat down on the edge of the bed, propped his arms on the edge of the bed, and called Xiaocheng.

He went to lift the quilt covering his head, but was pulled by another force.

"Xiaocheng, let me see you."

After Zhong Kexing said this, he felt that the other party had let go of his strength. He bent down, moved closer, and said, "You don't feel well, you can tell me."

Jiang Xiaocheng lowered his eyelashes and said in a disguised manner: "I'm fine, the wound is a little itchy, maybe it's going to rain, I'll take a nap and it will be fine."

Zhong Kexing was silent for a while, and said: "At the supermarket just now, you saw that father hugging his daughter to study, and he was touched and felt uncomfortable. Am I right?"

He stretched out his hand and stroked Jiang Xiaocheng's face with his thumb.

As if drinking a bowl of hot and astringent soup, an indescribable feeling permeates from his chest to the bottom of his heart. Jiang Xiaocheng did not expect that there is really a person who can perceive his feelings.

I had already secretly wiped away my tears, but now I couldn't help it anymore, and the tears flowed down like beads.

Zhong Kexing's heart seemed to be pinched by someone, and it hurt suddenly. He hugged Jiang Xiaocheng, face to face with him, and kissed him one after another.

Jiang Xiaocheng seemed embarrassed, sniffed and said, "I don't know what's going on, I can't control it, it will be fine in a while, in a while."

At the end, he couldn't stop laughing, and buried his head in Zhong Kexing's neck, his shoulders trembling slightly.

Zhong Kexing hugged him tightly, patted his back, and said, "It's okay, face me, you don't have to bear it."

In the silence, the collar of the shirt slowly became wet.

After a while, a muffled voice sounded.

"sorry."

"Sorry for what?"

"I lied before, my... father is probably still there, I don't know, I've never seen him."

Zhong Kexing stopped slapping, and listened to Jiang Xiaocheng's intermittent confession.

"When I was young, I also asked, but at my mother's place, I never asked anything. Every time I asked, her face changed very quickly, telling me to have time to wash the dishes and sweep the floor. Don't think about it. It's useless."

"I don't dare to ask any more."

"I have heard some things from other people. The relationship between my mother and grandpa is not very harmonious. They say that my mother has good grades and has been admitted to university, but my grandpa refused to provide tuition fees and asked her to work in a textile factory. Apprentice, I hope she earns money early so that she can help the family share the burden."

"My mother didn't go to the job arranged by my grandfather, but ran away secretly, and came back two years later, and there was me."

"At that time, it was a very controversial thing to conceive without marriage. Grandpa was very angry and asked my mother to abort the child, otherwise the relationship would be severed."

"But my mother gave birth to me anyway."

"Ke Xing," Jiang Xiaocheng raised his head, looked for Zhong Ke Xing's eyes, and asked in an airy tone, "Do you think a mother would hate her own child?"

Zhong Kexing's heart shrank suddenly, and he said: "No, pregnant in October, no matter what, the mother will not hate her child."

Jiang Xiaocheng's tears flowed down.

"I think so too. In those days, there was nothing to eat, and the winter was so cold. The town was small, and no one had any secrets. I can't imagine how determined she was to give birth to me. I can't understand why. I still don't like me when I was born."

"She probably regretted it and thought I was a burden."

"You are not," Zhong Kexing interrupted him, "Xiaocheng, you are not."

"Listen to me." Jiang Xiaocheng has never opened his heart to anyone in the past twenty years.

"Listen to me, my mother is very beautiful and tall. Once after kindergarten, I ran out of the door and saw her under the willow tree, wearing a red floral dress, bending down to look at me and smiling, long The long hair hangs down, and she has such a beautiful smile, I will never forget it in my life."

"But she seldom smiles at me like this. More often, she is drinking. When I was very young, she only drank beer. I don't remember when it started, and she changed to liquor."

"Every day after school, when I passed by the grocery store, I had to fetch wine for her. If I had no money in my pocket, I could only pay her on credit. One summer, there was a big hailstorm, and the rain flooded my ankles. The other students were picked up by their parents. , I waited until it was dark, the rain was still falling, I ran home and forgot to buy wine, she smashed everything in the house, and the glass shattered all over the floor."

"She was not like this at the beginning. I still remember that I had a high fever in the middle of the night. She carried me to the hospital behind her back and comforted me and said that I would be fine after a night of sleep. Suddenly one day, she stared at me bitterly, and in my ears It was all her crying and yelling, and the sound of bowls smashing on the ground."

"Later, I thought it might be a dream. I couldn't tell whether it was a dream or not what happened at that time."

"The more she drank, the worse her health became. She lay in bed all day, so thin that only a handful of bones remained."

"I bought everything at home. I pushed the bicycle and put the rice bag on the back seat. When a tricycle came across the road, the bag broke and all the rice was scattered."

"Later she started coughing up blood. We had no money for treatment, and she didn't want treatment. One day after school, a lot of people gathered in front of the house. They covered my eyes and wouldn't let me see."

"Ke Xing, she is only in her thirties, she has not eaten anything good, she has not worn anything good, and she has not seen anything good. It is the first time I come to Hangning, looking at the high-rise buildings, heavy traffic, and people coming People are often dressed so brightly, I thought, if I could take her to have a look, it would be great."

"Perhaps she would have a better life if she knocked me out, but I have no choice. Before I was born, no one asked me."

"It's not your fault," Zhong Kexing kept kissing his face, "Xiaocheng, it's not your fault, everyone has their own choice."

Jiang Xiaocheng slowly fell asleep.

Zhong Kexing wiped away his tears, dipped a towel in ice water, and wiped away his red and swollen eyes little by little.

He felt heartache and powerlessness. The weight of this heartache and powerlessness was something he had never achieved in his past life.

It cannot be eliminated, nor can it be erased. It is only pressed on the chest, and there is nothing to do.

Unfortunate lives are different, and it is happening all the time on the news, in books, and even around you, but when some kind of misfortune happens to someone you care about, the feeling is indescribable.

Zhong Kexing has always known that Jiang Xiaocheng lacks the love of his parents, which is why he is so inferior and sensitive, and dare not trust others, so he has been working hard, trying to make up for it with his own love.

Only today did he understand that one kind of love cannot replace another kind of love, and the lost love is hard to make up for.

Zhong Kexing opened the bedside drawer, took out a notebook from it, pulled out the paper hidden in the interlayer, and slowly unfolded it.

Staring at the words "Paternity Test Report", he did not look away for a long time.

The author has something to say: This chapter is very difficult to write