I want to have a relationship with you

Su Jingming thought to himself, if he held back and didn't reply to Wen Yan that day, Wen Yan wouldn't have come towards him.

Maybe now the ending will be different again.

In the end, I couldn't bear it.

Su Jingming thought more and more. Standing in front of the agreed hot pot restaurant, he didn't even notice that it was raining lightly.When Wen Yan hurried over, he saw Su Jingming standing in the rain in a daze.He strode forward with an umbrella, his breathing was a little unsteady, and he asked in a gentle tone: "What are you doing standing here, wake up?"

Su Jingming came back to his senses, the tip of his nose turned red from the cold.

Autumn was coming to an end, the autumn he hated the most.

Su Jingming asked him in a muffled voice, "Why don't you go abroad." He still couldn't hold back these words.

Surprise flashed across Wen Yan's eyes, and then he returned to normal. He rubbed Su Jingming's head twice, "Ren Wei told you, so you should know the reason, don't you?"

It was only then that Su Jingming realized that in the end, it was Wen Yan who did what he wanted, and he himself fulfilled the blessing of the year.

Everything went well.

After the two of them ate, the last autumn rain came to an end.

Wen Yan walked beside Su Jingming holding an umbrella, and the two of them intertwined their fingers hidden under the umbrella, and the heat from their palms filled the gap in their hearts little by little.

"When do you plan to visit your father?" Wen Yan asked him.

Su Jingming's original plan was to visit Su Qicheng on the second day after he came to Liangcheng, but the plan couldn't keep up with the changes, "Tomorrow." He paused, "You and I will go."

Wen Yan was slightly taken aback, then smiled and said hello.

Su Jingming added: "After all, it's someone who is going to get married, so it's not good if you don't take it with you to get to know each other."

Wen Yan postponed the meeting with the client the next day, and came to the largest cemetery in Liangcheng with Su Jingming.

Su Jingming felt that he was not filial, and after Su Qicheng died, he never came to visit him once.Cheng Hui was still in charge of Su Qicheng's death.

At that time, he avoided all these completely.

I also regretted it, but it was of no use.Especially from what Cheng Hui said, the final trigger was the scene of embracing Wen Yan, thinking that she was unforgivable.

Su Jingming felt that he was a very hypocritical person, no matter in which aspect he was the same.

The seniors of the same major told him that this is a typical low self-esteem, he attributes all bad things to himself, and solves everything by avoiding.

He keeps saying that he likes Tiga and wants to be Tiga.

In the end, he does not even belong to the shadow of light.

Su Jingming looked at Su Qicheng's tombstone, stood there silently, put in front of Su Qicheng's favorite wine and food, and lit his favorite cigarette in his hand.

His memory of Su Qicheng was only this.

Wen Yan: "I'll wait for you over there."

He thought that their father and son would be alone for a while.

Su Jingming began to recall the scene, Su Qicheng who once loved him, Su Qicheng who beat and scolded him, and Su Qicheng who repented.Magnified in my mind at this moment.

"Tsk." Su Qicheng took a deep breath, "You know, I don't dare to think of you these past few years. I'm not as brave as you, I'm a coward. When encountering things, I just bear and run away. For a while I You often appear in my dreams, you always stand far in front, looking at me quietly. At that time, I was thinking, at this time, do you want to love me, or want to hit me. I am like this Thinking of you, isn't it mean and shameless?"

"I'm not a good person, nor a good son. The mirror is broken, no matter how you repair it, the cracks will still exist. But whoever calls me your son, I am willing to do all of this. Accept it, these few I have experienced it personally.”

"After you left, my mother took care of everything in person, which can be regarded as fulfilling your wish." Su Jingming pursed his lips and remained silent for a moment, "Then why didn't you fulfill my wish? Ask, is it really that difficult? Can’t face the guy I like? Just choose this way, is it revenge on me, or is it redeeming yourself.”

He didn't understand Su Qicheng, just like Su Qicheng didn't understand that Su Jingming liked men.

Su Jingming suddenly wanted to understand where the character of avoiding things came from.He laughed, very loudly, and his laughter echoed in the silent cemetery.

Then the laughter stopped abruptly and there was a dead silence.

The winter in Liangcheng is long and deserted.

When Su Jingming came back to his senses, tears were streaming down uncontrollably.When the wind blows in winter, it is a biting pain, the pain is numb to the heart and the whole body, without any consciousness.It turns out that I will feel sorry for you.

Maybe the doubts in my heart will never be answered, or maybe the depression accumulated in my heart has been released.

He obviously didn't say anything nice to Su Qicheng, but he felt very relaxed.

He was right, not a good man, nor a good son.

Every word punishes the heart, this is him.

Just like back then, when he finished eating Su Qicheng's sweet and sour pork with no expression on his face, he still told Su Qicheng that he didn't like it.

The thrill of revenge?

Su Jingming couldn't feel it at all.

"Our father and son didn't talk well before, you see, I can't talk well now either." Su Jingming sniffed and stared at the photo on the tombstone. In the photo, Su Qicheng was younger than his actual age. According to Cheng Hui, it was taken by Su Qicheng when he first got married.It was also completely different from the Su Qicheng in his memory.

Suddenly, Su Jingming said hoarsely, "Dad."

"I regret it, do you regret it?"

I regret not reconciling with you earlier.

I also regret not telling you that I have a boy I like very much.

Su Jingming didn't know what Su Qicheng thought in the end, and he didn't know what kind of mood he had in his lifelong leap.His question went nowhere, and never got a response.

In the end, Wen Yan handed over the tissue.Su Jingming wiped away his tears, held Wen Yan's hand again as usual, and said to the photo on the tombstone, "This is my partner, the one who is going to get married."

Wen Yan's heart ached so badly, he held Su Jingming's hand instead, and said to Su Qicheng solemnly, "Hi Uncle, I'm Wen Yan, and I will definitely take good care of Su Jingming."

Hearing Wen Yan's solemn introduction of himself, Su Jingming suddenly felt his heart soften a bit, and instantly dispelled the haze in his heart just now.

He took Wen Yan's hand and laughed, "Actually, the sweet and sour pork ribs you made are delicious."

Now, he can no longer eat the sweet and sour pork ribs that he remembered.

I think he should be relieved.

The author has something to say:

I've got an old problem

The closer it is to the end, the more you will get stuck

There is a high probability that I can't bear these two sons.

TAT